SecondGuess
by to-love-is-to-lie
Summary: The events that led me to the Sound College were caused by sasuke, no doubt about it, after he ran off, Naruto & I had to find him... Was there any other choice? But time is running out, and i have my Gaara to find as well... GaaraXoc AU
1. Sound College

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, ect, ect, I do own Sora, ect, ect, don't own the quotes, ect, ect …. Conclusion? Disclaimers are ****BORING**

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_I'm all for keeping Dangerous Weapons out of the hands of fools, let's start with typewriters. – Solomon Short_

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**Day 4 in hell – Sound Selective School & University for Gifted and High-Achieving Students (what a name, speaks for itself, doesn't it?) – Sunday 26/1/18 – Sorano Takaski reporting. **

They say the more goodbyes' you get as you leave; the less likely you are to return. Well, I don't know if that is true, but it means I won't be returning to Konoha anytime soon.

Dunno what really led me hear, I mean, it was really a joint effort, I can't give all the wonderful praise to Sasuke, who ran off to get revenge on his stupid brother who be blamed for cutting his parents car brakes. There isn't any real proof, and Itachi very suspiciously moved to another country to join Ataksuki College (no long titles there, why couldn't have _he _gone to the stupid Sound Selective School & University for High-Achieving and Gifted Students?)

Naruto and I had a farewell party follow us to the gates, and I remember gripping his hand and refusing to look back. Not looking back has been my way out of everything lately. It's weird being in a dorm, my roommates haven't arrived yet, I'm very nervous over if they'll be nice or not. The school doesn't officially begin until February, but Naruto and I came early in a hope of getting to Sasuke before the college lecturers do (in case they are just as much of rapists as the principal, it was my suggestion.)

Life had been mostly a buzz of report cards and test papers, for the two years of 11 & 12 Naruto bunked with me and we had a blast.

A.k.a, it was horrible. We studied non-stop, worry made it hard to sleep, Naruto snores and I can hear it _THROUGH THE WALL_! And despite several pancake-making efforts on Sakura's part, nothing seemed to get through. But now we're here. It's all done, Naruto is a pro-studier and I just hope he can manage without me since I can't spend every waking minute of the day with him.

My wish is that I may be able to sleep here, but even though three nights here have kinda proved the 400 or so wall in-between me and Naruto _are_ think enough, I still don't trust them to stop his snoring…

I'm just waiting for it to make the pretty towers on the school/college collapse. Wait for it… wait for it…. nope. Not yet.

I read back through my old diary, and looked at how much I changed in one year, less, maybe. Well, I decided if that much happens unexpectedly, I better keep track of who I am this year too. And afterwards I can decide if my change was for the better or the worse. Ten bucks says it's for the worse.

Great, new low, making bets with myself… still. I think I have a good chance of winning this. I mean, last time I made a bet with myself the stakes were higher, but I have gotten out of that habit. I've found daring oneself to jump in a half frozen lake in le early thaw is _not_ a slightly sane idea.

Anyway, our plan to get to Sasuke failed and we have to spend an extra week or so being bored. Sasuke went 'home' for the holidays. Yeah. Sure. I wonder where he really is, I swear, by the end of this year I better either have Sasuke back home, or be the most intelligent person on earth, if one of those two things doesn't happen, I shall count this trip pointless.

And since that last one is practically impossible, Sasuke better be willing to come home. I have a Gaara to find.

And you know what? As soon as I moved away from home, the dreams kicked in too…. The endless dreams, dreams where he is just out of reach, and in a haze, so I can only just guess If it's him or not. And whenever I look at him straight-on he disappears, like it's only my imagination playing tricks on me.

Which, seeing as it's a dream, really, that's about it… but still. I wake up cold, not sweaty, or panting, (suss suss suss) just cold. Cold and silent. And the feeling of being lost lingers for most of the day.

It gives me shivers, and I sleep with seven extra blankets.

Anyway, this new diary came with a scented pen so I can sniff it. mmmm…. Pineapple-fresh.

Yuck. I hate pineapple. I need a new pen. Maybe grape. Grape is always a nose-tinglingly delicious scent.

God… I am still critically insane. So if I factor in the other three smells I like (being strawberry, apple & lemon, but lemon smells like dishwashing liquid, and apple is…erm… too apple-y. So I shall narrow it down to grape and strawberry), and my insane-ness, all conclusions point to me needing Naruto to help decide whether I should choose strawberry, or grape, both being sniff-worthy scents. _TO ZE BOYS DORM_!

(nanananananananana-BOYS-DORM-theme-musicccccc!)

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**Fives mins latersssss – still in hell, still day 4, still undecided on pen flavours**

Naruto told me to piss off. He has been very sour lately. I think somebody forgot to pack tampons.

No, not really, although t'would explain QUITE a few things.

But ever since it turns out Sasuke isn't here at ze moment, he has locked himself away and only let me in to deliver ramen I smuggled out of ze kitchens. I hate sad people, they annoy me as much as I annoy myself, so I threw pillows at him. His dorm peoples are used to seeing me in their dorm, they actually just wander about now, only _occasionally_ giving me shifty glances.

Well, not exactly _they_, more like just whats-his-name, who doesn't talk anyway. At first I think he was mildly concerned his roomie was attempting to drown himself in his own misery/the squishy chairs, but after a while (yeah, four days, this is a very caring guy) he just shrugs. I sometimes hear him wonder aloud when his girlfriend broke up with him.

Ahh. So he recognises le symptoms of love. How sad. But he has misread the 'girlfriend' part. And the 'broke up' since his 'girlfriend' wasn't even considerate enough to formally 'break up' because he/she is a stupid craptastic 'girlfriend'.

Anyway, after coming in an launching into a long pointless conversation, he threw an old coffee cup at me, which I (very, very, VERY strangely) caught. And then I started happy-dancing because I was co-ordinated and tripped over a pot-plant.

What-s'his-name laughed at me. Erg. I must find out what-s'his-name's name.

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**Day 5 in hell, 27/1/18- another boring day. People should start arriving soon, you can see Naruto get more and more stressed with every day…. **

Us newbies were given sheets of our classes, last year we selected courses to take, even though I don't plan on using this education. And as soon as Naruto get's Sasuke back on the right side, I'm dropping out for more important things.

But despite that, I took courses I'd like, I have art, English, and surprisingly the course on therapy came up; with an ironic smile on I had ticked that box too. Who knows, it may come in useful if I ever take up my old role in Konoha again.

Math is mandatory for the first year, which is hopefully all I'll be staying for, which sucks as well because a year without maths would have maybe even been fun.

Eh, bored, going to drop in one Naruto…

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**Hahaha. **

Naruto has ROOOMMIIIEESSS! Mine hasn't arrived…. YET! (dundundun). What-s'is-name is very quiet. The only noise I've heard him make really is that snort of suppressed laughter when I fell over the pot-plant.

He just sat and stared at the wall…. Naruto's other roommate is…kinda, well… obese. To put it kindly.

As all College attendee's are over 18 (or turning 18 in my case) we are free to do what we want, which is good because I know the Schoolies (highschoolers) are forbidden to go into ze boys dorms) I'm allowed to just pop over as often as I like (or as often as welcome) but my visits might be…erm, refrained, as El Fatty is a whore.

I had bounded in the door, happy as my usual happy self (which isn't very happy in this dump) and immediately got a 'Oh, so the first of my Fanbase has discovered my dorm.' From an obnoxious voice.

My face went red and I turned to face El Fatty, okay… words to describe El fatty? Obese, fat, overweight, podgy, high in cholesterol, salad-dodger, ect… If you look past his rolls, I'm sure you'd find some tall creep with a bad haircut made of oranges.

What-s'is-name raised his eyebrows and for the first time I noticed the two red tattoo's above his eyebrows. He shook his head and retreated to his room in the apartment/dorm.

El fatty just surveyed the oh-so-short me. I scowled at him. "Fanbase? No, I'm here to see Naruto." I snap, I resist the urge to say 'about this tall, slender, half your size, doesn't live on burgers, has less then seven chins…'

El Fatty smirked. "Oh, the blonde one? He's in his room. He seems awful quiet." Does this monster say anything _quietly_!?

Just then I was saved from conversation with ze new Doughboy because I heard a strangled cry of "Sora?" from Naruto's room, and I bowed quickly to ze Man with 7 Chins and slipped off to Naruto's room.

"Naaaaarutooooooo." I coo as I enter the room happily, grinning. "Surprised ze man with 7 chins hasn't accidentally inhaled you by now."  
"He's only been here for three hours." Naruto answered sourly, ignoring my hilarious intro. God, he needs cheering badly. My personal theory is his PMS'ing is caused by built-up sexual tension. But nobody ever listens to me when I put that theory foreword. Especially not Naruto, he just swore at me and threw stuff.

I grin. "Exactly." I sit on the end of his bed and sigh. "Seriously, _he'll_ be arriving any minute now. Aaa-ny minute. Just relax, otherwise your going to look stressed and like you've been missing him or something silly like that." I joke. We both knew what I meant by 'he'll'. Sasuke.

Sasuke had run off here two years ago, two whole years and now Naruto and I had worked our way up to the Sound School & College for Gifted & High-Achieving Students to find him and talk sense into him, we'd worked for years to add up to this moment, when he'd arrive. I knew Naruto was nervous, heck, I was nervous….

I roll my eyes and lie back on the bed. "Well, could be worse, you could have to share a _room _with ze eight wonder of the world."

Naruto throws me a sour look. As if to say 'stop joking, I'm about to explode from depression.' (Or sexual tension, either one.)

You see, through the two years we spent studying, Naruto was happy as Larry (and Larry is pretty happy) and I was a stressed mess. Now we have switched roles, and I am Larry-happy and he is a stress-mess. I mean, even the day I sung 'don't worry! Be happy!' and what-s'is-name caught me didn't make him laugh.

WHAT HAS HE BECOME!?

"Seriously, Sora, just go. I'll come and visit, your room-mate should have arrived." He said, rolling over and scowling at the wall.

I frowned intensely at him. He didn't notice my intense-frowning so I grumbled and headed back to my room, bowing to the man with 7 chins and What-s'is-name on the way out.

What-s'is-name seems very quiet. He also has a multitude of pills on the counter. I'm worried. If he's a druggie, I didn't see _ANYTHING_.

Well, he is also the hottest person on earth compared to the man with 7 chins, he's tall, and has shoulder-length silver hair, dark unsmiling eyes and those strange red tattoo's above his eyes. He is a curious person.

Anyway, I slipped out of ze room and down the hall into my own dorm, and as I opened the door I got the biggest shock of my life. There was a strange woman in my dorm. My mouth flew open and I forgot to breath (as one does when they are surprised).

Eventually I gasped for air and she turned to face me, a look of curious disdain on her face. "So you're my Dormmate?" she asked, eyeing me.

She was tallish, so I had to look up to see directly into her eyes, which were half-covered by the fringe of red hair (not orange like the man with 7 chins, red, auburn-ish), she had a look of 'I'm better then you' permanently plastered on her face, and she dressed in shorts and a plain white T-shirt with big sleeves.

I nod dumbly. "I'm Sorano." I say after a while, meeting new people never really made me comfortable.

She eyes me again. And shrugs. "I'm Tayuya." And with that, she turned back to packing, as if I wasn't worth her time, I scowl at her and head for the showers.

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**FIRST CHAPTER UP! Wow. It's good to be back! I can tell you all that, if any of you haven't read 'SecretKeeper' it doesn't really matter, and if you are half as lazy as I am (and I'm pretty lazy.) then don't bother, but if you are super-amazing-doing-stuff person, then go and read my perrrrrty! It got a quite a few good reviews, so I think some people liked it…. hehe. **

**ILOVEYOUFORREADING! Recommend to your fiendish friends. (and un-fiendish ones too) **

**Byyeee, love, to-love-is-to-lie. **

**(p.s. please review.)**


	2. Sasuke Search

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**Chapter Two: **

_It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.__ -__Douglas Adams_

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**Day 6 in hell – 28/1/18**

Tayuya is a bitch. That I have established. But we were the two odd ones out, and so there's only two in our dorm, instead of three or four. I guess that's one positive. I don't really mind because I am an expert on avoiding people, but I would rather not have to hide in my own apartment/dorm (apartment seeing as they are MASSIVE! They are like bloody SUITS man!)

Three more days. Then it will all fall into place, Sasuke should be here, as most people come two days early ( not a bloody fortnight, we were so stupid) to settle in.

Naruto is going to go bald. With stress. Don't men go bald when they are stressed? Well, I know pigeons do….

Hahaha. Naruto is a bald pigeon. I might have to go inform him of his bald-pigeon-ness.

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**four minutes later **

…. OHMYGOD! IT'S LIKE A FREAKING CITY OUT THERE! I'M NEVER VENTURING OUTSIDE EVER AGAIN!

I had stepped outside my dorm room confidently, only to be nearly swept away in the king tide of students, I have thought rush-hour at Konoha High (bogen school of the century) was scary, here it was like 2309480293million Konoha-Rush-hours put together, and that still didn't describe it. I had thought finding one person in this school was going to be easy, but really it was going to be more of a challenge then thought.

I had surrendered after trying to fight the tide of people and retreated back to my dorm, where I saw Tayuya walk out and the tide parted for her easily, I sigh.

Invisible girl is baa-aacckkk.

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**Lalala. Bored bored bored. Naruto hasn't gotten my mind-messages to come and rescue me. **

This is going to be harder then I thought….

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**YESSS!!!**

Eventually Naruto came over, he looked just as pissed off and irritable as usual, but I was still glad to see my bald pigeon friend.

We sat on my bed together, occasionally sighing, feeling depressed. He didn't know I had other places to be, people to find… but I know if he did, he would let me go and release me of any commitment I had.

That's why I'm not telling him I need to find Gaara. Because if he let me go, freely to find the person I loved, I knew I couldn't refrain from packing and leaving that very day.

So he must never know, and as soon as he's found Sasuke I can leave. But you know what I'm most afraid off? What if I can't leave… I need to try my hardest to not create any bonds. I need to be able to pack and leave on a whim, the more time I lose, the further away Gaara will float…. I can't risk losing him because I've been careless here and have let people tie me down.

So here I promise not to make any… _unnecessary_ commitments.

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**29/1/18 – day 7 in Hell. **

Today Tayuya brought over a really creepy friend of hers, (I just sat at the table, and pretended to be memorising my timetable) he was really tall and creepy. He made me wanna whip out the fly-spray like when I see a spider.

But it wasn't what he looked like that was really bothering me, it was what he was saying…

"… This is the year, Tayuya, he'll join us. And if he doesn't, it's his loss."

"He's perfect. I know he'll join, how long can one resist the sound four?"

"Soon to be five. I agree, he is the perfect candidate."

I shudder, this place had it's own social system. Maybe my roomie wasn't the normal person I had expected, either was Spiderman. After a long while of pretending to read I gave up and left with a feeling of uneasiness to fight the new crowds to naruto's dorm.

When I got there he was breathless and his blue eyes were wide. "I was about to find you!" he said, panting. "GUESS WHAT!?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"All students have to be at school by today. It's mandatory!" He said breathlessly, and for the first time in a long time I saw my exact emotions mirrored on his face, and the scowl that had been living on his lips for so long broke into a grin.

"He's here." I whisper, realization hitting me.

Naruto nodded. "I do believe we have tracking to do today." He said, grinning. I think it was not being able to do anything that was driving him insane, the fact he was here and Sasuke wasn't, he had worked so hard, and travelled so far expecting that the day he arrived he would see the love of his life, only to be let down… but now the playing field was even. And the game had begun.

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**Five hours later **

_Five hours later _

Five hours later 

Five hours later

Sorry, but I thought I'd rub that point in….

FIVE HOURS LATER!

FIVE FOOKING HOURS LATER!!! AND STILL NO SASUKE!!!

Naruto and I had retreated to my dorm (which had a better chance of being empty of annoying roomies) and had lunch, ( at the one hour point) then spent another four hours searching the school for any sign of our cockatoo-haired friend. No hope. Nothing. Zilch. Nadda. Zip. None. NOTHING!

Not even a mysterious twin brother to cause scandal! Erg. Naruto is here now, and he is looking depressed. He had his hopes up so high… I pat his head sadly, he swats my hand away and says something mean under his breath, I glare. "Seriously Naruto, we're going to find him. We are. So don't stress." _Otherwise you will turn into a pigeon_ I add in my head.

"Yes. But the longer it takes, the worse." He said, his words covered by the pillow.

I sigh. "Does it matter? No. he's no going anywhere, and either are we." I say, and then remember my promise. "Well, not until we get him home, at least." I finish.

Naruto grumbled something, and rolled over, I leant against the backboard of the bed while he once again attempted to drown himself in his own self-pity.

After a while I venture out to make instant ramen to feed him, and find Tayuya at the table not with Spiderman this time, but with The man with seven chins. I almost drop the old cup I was carrying out.

They turn as I fumble with the cup, lose control and it shatters on the tiled floor, Tayuya just raises an eyebrow and shrugs I knew what she was thinking, the message came out loud and clear.

_Freak. _

I cringe, and shudder. I had always thought this kinda stuff stopped at highschool. Turns out I guess we never really grow out of it. After making ramen for Naruto and discussing how we would meet tomorrow at his dorm to have another Sasuke search, Naruto sighs.

"A Sasuke search won't help." He said finally.

"What?" I ask, frowning.

"Think about it, this is Sasuke. Would he really be out socializing?" He raises his eyebrows at me, and sigh.

"He may have changed?" I say hopefully, a pathetic excuse.

Naruto snorts. "Yeah, and Shika will fail a test." He looked at me. "Think Sora, there's no way we'll see him outside until school starts."

"Well what do you propose we do then!?" I snap.

Naruto grinned, and I felt the anger that had been building release and I grin back automatically. "We use those stalker skills of yours. It's time to find us a room number."

I laugh, and feel the tension ease, I was surprised at the sound of my laughter. Feels like a long while since I've heard it.

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**Hellooo! Thanks so much for reviewing! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU! I'm really glad to see familiar names. THANKS HEAPS FOR READING!!! **

**Love, to-love-is-to-lie **

**P.s. I'm going away tomozza so I may not update for a while… sorry!!!!**


	3. First Glance

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**Chapter Three: **

_A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. - __Herm Albright_

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**30/1/18- Friday – second last day in semi-hell. Real hell begins soon. (aka, school.) **

Naruto and I went on a stealth mission again; it's good to see Naruto is now Larry-happy and not a Balding-Pigeon.

That is a very strange sentence….

Anyway! On our quest we found many amazing people. It turns out What-sis-name does leave the dorm occasionally. With his pills. Seriously, this guy is addicted! He needs professional help.

No, I am _experienced_ help. Not _professional_. That's right. I can read your mind you stupid scented diary. I recommend professional, because they don't freak out and run away. Anyway, we found many amazing people but not the person we were looking for. We also got lost and spent another 4 hours navigating our way back to our dorms.

You see, there are Uni-dorms and there are Highschool-dorms. Highschool-dorms keep boys rooms and girls rooms totally separated. Uni-dorms have the dorms along the same side of the building (in one long row) and it goes all the girls rooms, then all the boys rooms.

Since Tayuya and I were the last one's on ze wonderful list of roomie's, we were the odd one's out and are the last girls dorm. Which is good for me, and apparently for her too since all of her friends seem to be guys too.

Naruto turned into a Balding-Pigeon soon after returning to his dorm. I know this because the Man with seven Chin's said 'what'd you say to the poor guy? He's crushed.' In his fat obnoxious way. I hate him.

I _really_ don't like him. I think he has chins on his chins, but because that are covered by his first set of 7 chins you can't see them unless you look from a certain angle. And because I am short I get more of the lovely view of his second set of chins then other people.

Well, that's my theory anyway…

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**11:00 **

I hate to say this, but I miss home. When I get lost in writing in this diary, I suddenly wake up and freak not to see my old room. I miss Sakura's visits, miss Shika's reasoning with me when I'm hysterical, I miss kakashi's guilty grins when he sees me watching him and Iruka.

Most of all I miss Gaara. But he doesn't belong to home anymore, he belongs to wherever he is. My whole being just wants to run now, run and never stop until I find him. But I can't, because I have Naruto to look after, and Sasuke to slap.

Naruto doesn't know I let him go… this whole mess was primarily caused by me, because that night I had the power to stop him leaving… but didn't…

Naruto would never forgive me if he knew, he'd never speak to me again. I know it. I remember that night so clearly, and I remember the day after so hazily. I know Naruto came over, and I know I felt the words cut my throat as they wanted to get out. To tell him. To explain.

But I couldn't. I couldn't if I wanted to help him, because he would never accept help from me once he knew I'd betrayed him. Hadn't I promised myself too, that if Sasuke ever hurt Naruto again, he's dead meat?

Well, wasn't I really the one who had hurt him? It doesn't matter. Naruto won't know, I'll fix what I messed up, and then go find Gaara. It'll all work out.

But I cringe none-the-less as the memories come floating back…

_He walked, slowly towards me, I swallowed and stopped running, I knew he wouldn't say anything, I knew I was too late… I clenched my fists, looked down. And resisted the angry tears. _

_I had lost another one. That made three._ Three_. One to death, another to regret, and now the third to revenge. My shoulders shook, and I wiped the tears away angrily, I saw his shadow pass under the dim light, past me, without a word. _

_I turn around angrily. "SASUKE!" I yell, he turns. I swallow, and look at him through bleary tear-blurred eyes. "We'll miss you." I whisper, "And remember, two years, we'll see you then." I smile weakly. "We'll see how much we've grown. Two years." I remind. _

_He smirks, an obvious challenge, I laugh weakly. "Bye, Sora." He said, smiling. _

What went through my mind!? Why did I let him walk away!? It was stupid… this whole thing could have been STOPPED!

Erg. It's not true… I know it's not. Scratch that. I know he would have left anyway, Naruto may have been able to stop him… but I couldn't have. I know that. Maybe I did what's right. I'm not sure.

I wonder if he's forgotten us. I wonder if he has forgotten my promise. …. I wonder if he is expecting us…

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**31/1/18 – last day before all hell breaks loose. **

Crowds are everywhere. I'm working myself up to going to Naruto's dorm and convincing him it's worth another stalking-session before he goes balding-pigeon on me. I really don't know what he'd do without me.

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**8:00 – I saw him. **

After a pointless day of pep-talking Naruto (which failed) I went scowling out, tripped over that stupid pot-plant (What-s'is-name laughed again, why does _he_ always catch me doing stupid things!!??), then went out to do some Sasuke-stalking myself.

At about 5pm I headed back, staring pointlessly at my feet and avoiding the people who were going to run me over. I was bumping shoulders with every pair of feet that passed me. And I knew it was because none of them could see me properly. Why!? WHY!?

Then I saw another pair of shoes walking towards me, I braced myself for the impact as usual, but then they stepped to the side. My head flicked up, sending blonde hair flying, I whipped around and my eyes widened, why the hell had somebody avoided me?

Now _that_ was just a freak incident, it was what I saw when I was looking at the person who had avoided me. I looked up and saw the Snake-Rapist, and hissed under my breath. If it wasn't my fault he left, it was most defiantly _his_. Then walking next to him, was a tall, confident, cold looking version of the person I once knew.

My breath caught in my throat, and it was suddenly like I couldn't inhale. My head swum, and I pushed uselessly toward him, the crowd swept my backwards, and I swore, and I went to the wall where I was less likely to be pushed around, and made my way towards him.

I didn't know what to think, I was angry. But I hadn't seen this person, one of my best friends in over two years now. What could I say? My heart beat faster at the sigh of him, I had missed him. But still, before the mad hugging I would give him, I would make him so sore that when I did hug him he wouldn't even be able to move his mouth to complain.

He was defiantly taller. His features had changed and he had shorter, spiky hair now. He had a black T-shirt on over a open white one, and black pants. He was still the hottest person on earth, but I really didn't care because a) I knew where his interests lay and b) I was so mad at him right now my main aim was to kick his ass.

Then I ran right into what-s'is-name. I swore loudly at him, and he looked shocked. "I didn't think you talked." He said. Then I looked surprised too. There was an odd feeling of déjà vu about this situation…

"I was wondering the same thing." I respond, then my mind snaps back to where my target was and I jump up, and swear again. He was gone. I could have almost cried in anger, I hit the wall, forgetting What-s'is-name.

"Erm…" he said, blinking at me. I turn to glare at him.

"Great! Now I've lost him!" and then slap my hands to my mouth. He blinks again. And I sigh, I knew I'd cry soon if I didn't get out of here. Failure hurt more then anything else. I had been so close… "Goodbye." I said bluntly and power-walked to my dorm.

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**11:34 **

I know why it was familiar…. The situation with what-s'is-name. my heart aches thinking about it.

_Gaara sighed, and plucked the knife from my hands. "You have to cut side-ways, other wise you'll cut right through the part we're meant to be looking at." _

_I blink at him, and he looked up, raising an eyebrow. "You talk?" I ask._

_"I was wondering the same question about you." he told me, voice bland. I smile, and shrug, we continued on with our usual silence_

When I realized why it felt strange, I nearly died. What-s'is-name wasn't like Gaara, he seemed shy. More reserved. Gaara was feared sub-consciously by everyone. Everyone avoided _him_, what-s'is-name seemed to avoided everyone.

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**11:46 **

I won't tell Naruto I saw him. I think he wants to have the first glance. Plus, if he knew he had let the chance to see him go because he was being a bald-pigeon he'll never forgive himself.

Lessons start tomorrow. It all really depends on what classes we have. Naruto sucks at the subjects I'm good at like art and English, so I had managed to persuade him it was more important that he did well in tests, rather then be with me. We were in the same Math anyway.

So Naruto took Biology and science, business & math (and I advised him against this, but I knew he was picking the one's Sasuke would have taken)

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**I decided to quickly post this before I leave! LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH THANKS FOR REVIEWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Really, I do love you!!! **

**Love, to-love-is-to-lie **


	4. Encounter

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Chapter Four

_Let Not the Sands of Time Get in Your Lunchbox – National Lampoon_

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**11:50**

I need to speak to Naruto damnit! Like, NOW! Maybe I can make it across…. Hmm… too risky. They do have a curfew here.

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**11:53 **

Maybe I can crawl through the vents. That would be fun.

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**1/2/18 – ohgodohgodohgod. – I'm not even going to bother to count the days in hell from now on. It will just make me feel more depressed. **

Tayuya had showered early, and left. We don't talk, and I have a feeling we both like it that way.

I have half an hour before we meet in the hall. I had rushed around like mad for a while and now I'm just sitting and focusing my energy to get me through the day (with toast).

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**After Lessons – 9:00 **

I'll start from the beginning. Naruto and I stayed close together as we filed into the hall, the high-schoolers had half of the building for them, this side was for college students only.

I felt Naruto go tense too, as we filed in and saw that stupid Rapist-Snake on the stage. We took seats and settled, still high-strung, as if as soon as we saw Sasuke we'd grab him, throw him in a sack and cart him home.  
On stage there were Five students. I recognised four of them, to my surprise I had encountered all of them in the last four days or so.

Tayuya, The man with Seven Chins, Spiderman and What-S'is-Name all sat on chairs, and a little over, just enough to make him more important then the others was a boy a few years older then me with glasses and long silver hair, he had a self-satisfied smirk on his face as he surveyed the hall. I grimace. Great, all our student-council leaders were up themselves.

Except for maybe What-s'is-name because I haven't actually heard him say much about anyone, let alone himself.

The on who was obviously more important then the others stood, adjusted his glasses and stepped foreword with grace that I didn't this men had. He smiled. "Welcome to the new term, to those who don't know me, I'm Kabuto, school Captain…" he trailed off, well, he didn't, I just stopped listening, and immediately scanned the crowed for any crow-black heads. I found many…. Just none that perfect shape. Not exactly perfect size because in my perspective Sasuke's head is too inflated for his body and needs to be popped.

I sigh, and prop my head on my heads, bored already. Kabuto seemed to still be rattling on about school spirit or something, and those that were listening seemed genuinely in awe. I blow the air out of my cheeks a touch too noisily and get some dirty 'how could you interrupt him?' glares.

After what felt like years we were finally allowed out. And I headed straight to my first Lesson. Math… great.

It felt like High-school all over again. Haven't I already passed your damn tests!? I pout as I enter the room, knowing I would never see Sasuke here. He was probably in 1st level math doing stuff like 94209834923492374 – 23894729387489237492379842 in their heads. Which no normal person does. Well, at least one who is crap at math like me.

It took basically everything out of me to tackle the arithmetic given to us be the Sensei. College is different, not Mandatory, it's like here we are in total control of our own learning, and I can sit and draw on my margin and they don't care.

You know, I could get used to this…

I got through the day with stress, true; because each class I was in I had to scan the room to see if Sasuke was here. Then I walked into the Art room. It was beautiful. It makes being here almost bearable. It was the last Lesson of the day, and after this I could go to the dorm and sleep off my worries. But as soon as I walked into that art room, my worried disappeared instantly anyway.

I seriously am planning on pitching a tent and living here for good. I'd rather be sharing a room with paint then Tayuya. As soon as I saw its massive brilliantness I almost died. I felt like going and hugging the room, but then composed myself, took a seat closest to the paint so I could smell it (yes, I smell paint. Shh.) And relaxed. It was almost like being home, so when Sasuke sat next to me I hardly noticed.

Infact, it was only until I reached down to get my VA book, and opened it, that I realized A) it was empty and B) Sasuke _shouldn't_ be next to me. I go pale, and turn to him, and immediately fall off my seat, nobody else was here yet, so I was free to sit on my ass and stare at him.

He laughed, and my heart went into overdrive, I've missed him, my plans of slapping him melted and I leaped on him and hugged him. I felt his arms wind around my waist and I buried my nose in his (now short) hair and smelt the familiar smell I'd missed. _Sasuke_.

"I've missed you." I whisper, and try my hardest not to cry. I hate crying but I seem to do it an awful lot.

When he finally pried me off him he surveyed me, I'd changed too and I knew it…we not much seeing as I used to be at eye-level on him and now he looked down to see me. My blue eyes were the same, I was still pale, short and didn't have much in the chest-area, and I still wore my hair in the same pony-tail after so many years, I guess it was mainly how I held myself. I was different.

"I've missed you too." He replied, to my true surprise. It wasn't like Sasuke to be so open. I hardly expected a hug. Or a laugh. Or anything. I thought he'd hate me for coming. "You actually made it." He said, half in disbelief half in awe.

I frown at him. "'Course we did. What'd you think?"

He frowned too. "We?"

I look at him, confused, of course Naruto had come, would he let me leave without him? I don't think so. "Me-" I was cut off as more people entered the room, I shuffled back from Sasuke, reluctantly, noting how close I'd gotten. To tell the truth I never wanted to be this far away from him again. And I can imagine if I felt this strongly about him as a friend, Naruto must be in all hell right now.

And he said he didn't wanna take art class. Hmph. Serves him right.

Sasuke's face suddenly shifted. It was like a cold change coming over, bringing the afternoon storm after a blisteringly hot day, I felt suddenly betrayed, and I realized by the way he now held himself slightly away from me, nobody else knew the Sasuke we did.

I'd gotten the message, and now the urge to slap him returned, and I got up and moved across the room as other people filed in, I saw his eyes change to regret as I moved, but I didn't care. I was angry. He _had _changed.

I spent the rest of the day making a title-page, it was such a juvenile activity, and yet they still made us do it. I reckon it's a sly way of sussing out the good artists from the bad.

I tried to hard to just bury everything into my art, but just ended up breaking pencil after pencil until the Art Sensei made me clean desks. Great. In the wrong already, I saw Sasuke cover a small smile at the scowl on my face. It must be like being home for him too. I almost smiled back, then my scowl just deepened and I resumed breathing in paint fumes (albeit, willingly) while wiping desks.

By the end of the day I was light-headed, and I saw Sasuke hang back. He wanted to talk, really? Well, this ship had sailed. He better go find Naruto if he wants to talk. I rush out of the room and see him follow swiftly.

He caught my wrist. "Don't be stupid, Sora, I haven't seen you in _two years_!" he said, look at me hard. "Please, let me just know how stuff is going back ho- in Konoha." He had almost said 'home' I had heard it, my angry resolve nearly was washed away, but then hardened again. I shook my head.

"Go find somebody else." I hinted. In my head thinking '_narutonarutonarutonaruto_' over and over. Well, last time mind-messaging worked, either that or Naruto got bored over being a bald-pigeon alone.

Sasuke glared at me, and it was like being 15 again. In the batcave, I almost got to looking for an orange or something to throw at him, but found only the cold marble window-ledge. "Who else is there!?" he said, but I just kept walking, and walking, until I found my dorm.

And now I'm here, on my bed, seething at his bloody 'I can treat my old friend who loves you enough to come all the way here just to slap sense into you but instead hugged you madly which was a bad decision like she will just come back.' Uh-ah. Nup. No way.

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**HELLO ALL! Thankye for being patient!!! THANKYOU FOR READING!! Thankyou SO MUCH for reviewing ze last chappie! THANKSTHANKSTHANKSTHANKS! It means SO MUCH! Really. It does. You are all more hilariously hilarious then you think. Most of your reviews make me laugh out louudd. (in ze good way). **

**Luurrvvee, to-love-is-to-lie **


	5. Kimimaro

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**Chapter Five**:

_Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad.__ - __Norm Papernick_

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**Ahhh!!! Who am I kidding? **

I CAN'T DO IT! I love him too much. Erg. I need to see Naruto! I can keep seeing him in the halls from him, but not this. I crept out of the dorm, expecting to see Tayuya there, but when she wasn't, I made a bolt for Naruto's dorm.

I don't bother knocking, the man with 7 chins (who is really called Jirobo, I was informed by Mr. Assembally with glasses) and What-s'is-name (I didn't catch his name, I think by that time I was tuned out.) are used to me just coming in and out.

I sneak into naruto's room and sit on the bed. "Naruto." I whisper. "NARUTO!"

He jerks awake. "Wha?"

I slap his foot. "Wake up! I have news!"

He sits up immediately. He knew what I meant by 'news'. "What?"

"I saw him." I look him in the eyes. "In art class."

"And?" Naruto could tell I was reluctant to tell the whole story, I knew he'd agree that the mad hugging had been a mistake. I sigh, and start from the glimpse I saw the other day.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!?" he roared once I'd done. "IT'S FREAKING 10:00! AND YOU HAD ALL AFTERNOON!" I cringe. I knew he was right.

I heard stirring from outside, and muffled 'what the hell?' voices. I glare at him. "I know! I know, but keep it down!"

"I can't believe you Sora! What kind of excuse do you _even have_!? We work together in this!" that cut. I knew I knew I knew. I really did and I had no clue why I didn't rush straight to his dorm to report, because that's all I really was in this, a reporter. I wasn't the thing that could bring him back, only Naruto could do the persuading… and judging by Sasuke's tone at the 'We' I'd said, he doesn't even know Naruto is here….

After a while I gave up, Naruto had turned into an angry-pigeon now, and was clucking at me (Not really, but it was close).

I didn't even bother glaring at What-s'is-name after he laughed at me for tripping over the pot-plant.

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**2/2/18 – Tuesday **

Great. Naruto isn't talking to me. I shunned Sasuke so he isn't talking to me. Tayuya ate the last piece of bread this morning. The man with seven chins almost inhaled me when I went to plead guilty to Naruto.

This is not my day. But of course, me being the boring, uninteresting, totally _sane _person I am nothing happened…

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**Two minutes later **

Ok, on second thought, I did have a _rather_ strange conversation with What-s'is-name…. And I also found out his name. YAY! I am now saving ink. Because his name is shorter then What-s'is-name. I think…

Anyhoo, it's Kimimaro, and he is very quiet. To everyone but me, because I give off the 'I'm invisible' look. I think he _tries_ to be invisible. He wants it. Which is strange because I'd kill for his problem.

Apparently he has a fanbase. Woohoo. Gosh, isn't that HORRIBLE. I mean, seriously, I'd rather be totally ignored then followed by adoring attractive fan people (I say people because I'm not sure they're all girls.)

It all began because the fatman of all fatmen had left and I sat at the bench moodily. This was like my second dorm (When the man with 7 chins left) so I helped myself to coffee.

Then he sat down, Kimimaro. I looked up in surprise as there were plenty of chairs in the dorm to choose from. I shrugged mentally, and focused on my coffee and plans to make Naruto forgive me.

"Is the blonde one angry at you?" he asked simply, staring out the window.

I look at him, confused. "Yeah, I didn't tell him something I should have." I said, and then nearly choke on the sip of coffee. Where did that come from? Since when did I agree to tell him that?

STUPID BRAIN! You let my mouth off its leash!

I raised an eyebrow, I could tell he knew I'd let too much slip. I blushed. Damnit! WHO LET ME CHEEKS OUT OF THE CAGE!? My body was going into overdrive, and I was just digging a bigger hole for myself. I quickly looked for a topic-change, and found one on the counter. "Like coffee? I like coffee. It's very nice. Calming, almost. Caffeine really isn't good for me though, sends me a little nutty. Like that new ice-cream I saw in the freezer yesterday. Mmm. It was nice. I don't think I was supposed to eat it thought, I mean, I only ate a bit though. Not like the man with seven chins would have, he would have inhaled it and-" I stopped at the look on his face, I realize I had forgotten to breath. I inhaled and felt myself relax.

"You turned purple for a moment there." He said, eyeing me strangely. "And who has seven chins?"

I go pale again, and sigh, eyeing my coffee. "What kind of coffee is this!? seriously. You people drink insane-drugs." I eye it and tip the rest in the sink, then face him again. "Okay, I'm calm."

He restrained a smile. "So, what's your name? I just called you 'the potplant girl'."

Wow. He has crazy names for things too. Surprising. I thought I was the only insane one. Well, not really, but the only CRITICALLY insane one.

"Sorano. But call me Sora, Sorano reminds me too much of my mother." I say simply, then turn pale again. _WHY AM I SAYING THESE THINGS_!?

He smiled, seeing my inner-police-search to see who put my thoughts in the open. "Okay, Sora then."

I smile. "Yeah, it's better." I pause, staring at my empty mug. "Why isn't there coffee in here?" I ponder. Then once again, realize I said it out loud, and then almost instantaneously do the stupidest thing yet. I smacked my head on the bench-top as hard as I could.

Why? Because I felt stupid, and hurting myself of course made _all_ the difference. It must have looked SO WEIRD because there was no warning and I had given myself a concussion without a word.

He now gave me a 'I'm scared' look. I tried to reassure him but then got caught up with the red stuff coming out of my face, I frown at it, as the world spun. Maybe I hit my head a touch too hard on that bench-top…

Of course, when I could see properly again I was lying on the couch and Kimimaro was looking over me, holding a tea towel to my face.

I sit up, then regret it instantly and the world swum again. I fell back. He sighed. "You should see the nurse."

"No!" I say instantly. I have bad memories of school nurses.

"No way, you're seeing her. You practically _fainted_." He looked at me as if I was crazy. "Why did you hit your head anyway!?"

I blink. "I don't know…"

"That's it." he hauled me up. "You're seeing the nurse."

"NONONO!" I yell.

He sighed, looking at me. "Fine, then I'll take you to Kabuto."

"WHAT!? Why!? I don't _even know him_!" I say, I seemed not to care I was being carried along by a complete strange I had only learnt the name of an hour before, it was like it was familiar already. Like I did know him.

"But _I_ do." He said simply.

So I was forcefully carted off to Kabuto's dorm. He looked up, he had a '_private_' dorm. Ohh. Isn't he _snazzy_, and raised his eyebrows. I don't think it's a regular thing that a girl covered in blood is brought to his room.

"Er, Kimimaro?" he asked, not even bothering to voice the '_WHAT THE HELL!?_' question.

"She needs a checkup. You wouldn't believe what she did if I told you." he said simply.

I swayed on my feet as he let me walk, and then immediately my legs gave up and I ran into the wall in my last attempt to keep on my feet. Hahaha. I remember laughing when I hit the ground.

"Okay… maybe I do need to see the nurse…" I muttered. Kimimaro raised his eyebrow again and sighed.

"You think?"

Kabuto sighed. "So, what happened?" he said, stepping foreword, he was different ton what he was on the stage, more professional, like suddenly he had a job to do.

He put his hand on my head and looks me in the eyes for a moment. Nodded, and we around, asking me various totally random questions.

"She hit her head?" he suggested. Kimimaro nodded, like this was a totally normal talent.

I, for one, freaked out. "OHMYGOD! How did you know? Are you psychic? Can you read my mind!? Okay, tell me what I'm thinking….okay, go!"

"That my glasses are funny." He suggested.

"OHMYGOD! HOW _DID_ YOU KNOW!!??"

"You were staring." He said, looking at my blandly, then laughed. "Where did you find this one? She's something different."

"She came into my dorm and bled everywhere when I asked her what her name was."

He laughed again. "I have a feeling I'll see you again. Just have a good nights sleep and you'll be fine."

I nod. "Mhmm. _Fiiinnne_." I say, still giddy from the hit to the head I took.

"So what did she do?"

"She smashed her head on the counter."

"Why!?" he demanded, looking at me as if I were crazy. Gosh, who would think that? "Those things are solid!"

"I don't know." He said, he was awful cold all of a sudden.

Kabuto was still confused, but shook his head. "Anyway. Just make sure you don't do anything too stressful for the rest of today." He advised.

"Hey, why are _you_ telling me this anyway!?" I demand.

"He's one of the best doctors on the continent, Sora."

"Why is he still in school then!?" I demand

"Um, 'he' is still here." Kabuto put in, an amused look on his face. "Okay, get her back. She needs sleep."

"No I don't!" I counter instantly. "It's like …. Like…. Um… what's the time?" I look up innocently at them. The boys just sighed and Kimimaro hauled me up and led me back to his dorm, where Naruto was now sitting on the couch moodily, looking incredulously at the bloodstains.

"What happened!?" he demanded.

"She nearly broke her own nose." He replied calmly.

Naruto ran foreward and took my weight on his shoulder, looking suspiciously at Kimimaro, who was already half way to his dorm. Naruto shook his head. "You know, that's the first thing I've heard him say."

"What?" I ask. "We had a perfectly fine conversation earlier before I ruined it with my minor concussion." I said, leaning against him.

"Really? That's strange, he doesn't talk to anyone." Naruto grinned. "You still attract the quiet dangerous ones."

"Shh… Now, I wanna sleep." I told him, and he sighed and walked me to my dorm.

When we reached my dorm room, he paused. "And Sora, your forgiven." He told me, I grinned at him and slipped inside.

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**…**

Okay, maybe I under-estimated when I said nothing happened….

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**My head still burnnnns.**

Maybe I should get some ice…

Nah. Ice isn't fun. Ice is cold and hard. And hurts when you drop it on your toes.

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**I enjoyed writing this chappie. God knows why, I am a sick person who finds amusement in minor concussions? Probably. Hehe. Anyway, I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING!!! THANKS SO MUCH!!! **

**THANKS HEAPS FOR READING TOOOOOO!!! **

**Lots of luurrvveee, To-love-is-to-lie **


	6. Anger

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**Chapter 6: **

_A person's abilities are tested best when Defending rather then attacking – Animal Crossing_

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**Wednesday 3/2/18 **

Today we had art, as much as I hated it, I didn't wanna see Sasuke so I skipped it and went back to my dorm, then returned for Math.

You know, you'd think it would be the other way around for me, but it's not. Which sucks.

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**Thursday – 4/2/18 **

Today I nearly blew something up in Chemistry. And I found out Kimimaro is in my Science, we sat together and then my mind went into 'let Sora's mouth do whatever it wants' mode and I told him the whole story how I got lemon juice in my eyes one time and ended up falling on the teachers desk.

He seemed kinda glad I was insane at home too. And it wasn't just me being around him that made me hurt myself.

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**Damnit. I was caught. **

Well. I lasted three days, and I call that a pathetic effort. I am a pro Sasuke-avoider. I'm TRAINED! But _noooo_. I was discovered.

He found out my dorm number. Stupid Tayuya.

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**Finefinefine. I'll tell you what happened. But it's a long story and I'll get handcramps so you better be grateful. **

Okay, I had hugged Naruto g'night and had retreated to my dorm to be depressed over not being able to go find Gaara, then I heard a knock on the door, and I heard Tayuya squeal.

She had been tarting up for the last ½ hour as I had been doing my Calculus homework, and so I had already assumed it was a date.

But the date wasn't for her, it was for me. Which she obviously wasn't happy about, because I think when the hottie of the century asked for her dorm number, she interpreted it as 'let's go out'.

Which is understandable. I need to lecture Sasuke on the effect he has on girls who don't know he swings the other way.

I recognised his voice, which automatically made me step out, I was just in time to hear the "Is Sorano here?"

Tayuya threw the me the dirtiest, back-stabbing 'I'll get you for this' look she could manage, and she is pretty good at dirty back-stabbing 'I'll get you for this' looks. And me being me, I cowered for a while before Sasuke grabbed my wrist and dragged me outside.

"I've been looking _everywhere_ for you for the past three days, what the hell are you doing!?" he demanded angrily, as we walked.

"I am an expert at hiding. But you cheated; you used Tayuya who _isn't _the expert at hiding." I glare at him.

"I did what was necessary."

"You do realize she'll kill me for this." I warn.

"Yep."

"You mean, cruel bastard." I say, glaring again.

A grin flashed across his face. "Now, can't we be civil?"

"No."

He looked me in the eyes, the gaze was pleading this time. "Please. I haven't seen you for two whole years, Sora. Can you tell me what happened? How you got in, what course are you studying? Please."

"I didn't think you wanted to know these things. I didn't think you cared about anything that was connected to home." I put emphasis on the word 'home.'

He winces. "I left because I had too. But first answer my questions."

He had led me to the posh courtyard, and we sat. I sigh, and begin. "Well, it was a hell of a lot of hard study to get here, trust me on that. And then Sakura, Shika and Naruto and I all worked on overtime to raise money to get us here, and then, well, then we're here."

"How is everyone?"

"Good. Shika and Sakura are still happily together, in my opinion, they're in it for life. Kakashi is doing awesome, him and Iruka are happy as ever-" I stop, and then look at him, I had forgotten he hadn't been there for that part of the year.

He had his eyebrows raised high, and a small grin had made itself out on his lips. "Well, Kakashi and Iruka?"

"I was delivering a late report." I said, answering the unsaid question. "Déjà vu." He laughed, and it was good to hear the sound. I grin in answer. "They are grown though, so I was only invited to be an excuse occasionally."

"What else?"

"Choiji has lost weight. Ino is still a whore," I pause, thinking. "We all did well on our tests and…" I had been about to say 'I saw Gaara' but decided against it. Judging by the look on my face he had known so well when Gaara left he knew what I was thinking.

"Have you heard anything?"

"Not since Graduation." I say, looking at the ground. "He came."

"And?"

"He left." Sasuke sighed.

"I'm sorry. Be probably wouldn't have left if I hadn't… hadn't been stupid in the first place."

"Don't worry. What's done is done and I'll go around and fix it anyway." I sigh, and lean against him, before we start fighting over how to get him to come back, I'd like to spend a night with Sasuke, just talking, catching up. "They all miss you…"

"Hm?" he asked, he was staring at me, I swallowed.

"You have no idea the havoc you caused by leaving." I muttered. Looking at the ground, he joined me in awkwardness.

"How is he?"

"Naruto?" I ask, surprised. I start to glare. Why can't he ask him himself? "He misses you, he misses you more then anything else in the world, he _loves_ you."

He looked up, surprise and joy flickered across his features for a spilt second, then returned to the mild curious look he had going the whole time. "He does?"

"Damn right he does! You left him in pieces, Sasuke, he loves you. _You're his_ _world_." I say, trying to make him understand. "Will you please go talk to him?"

"What? I can't!"

"WHY!?" I demand, getting angry now.

Sasuke looked shocked. "He's all the way in Konoha."

I pale, I felt the blood rush from my face, and then I laughed. It was humourless and cold, he looked at me, surprised again. I shook my head. "No, dearie, he's _here_."

He went cold too, and pale. "What? Here? _Now_?" he asked sharply.

I incline my head. "Yep. We travelled all this way, buddy. Together."

He had stood, looking as if he wanted to bolt, but then he sat down hard and the plain shock on his beautiful features turned to rage. "You brought him here." He whispered intensity in his voice.

"I did." I admit.

"You brought him here, Sora, you fucking brought him here! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!?" he stood again, and in one fluid movement knocked the delicate vase that was sitting on the walls base two meters away it shattered loudly, and he swore.

"We told you. Two years." I stated.

"_You_ told me two years." He corrected. "I remember that night, Sora, and I waited two years. I waited for you. Not him!"

"Why the hell don't you want to see him!?" my voice rose to meet his, and I stood, we were less then a few inches apart, both bristling with anger.

"I just don't! I can't!"

"Seriously, Sasuke, I promised myself if you ever broke his heart I'd never let you live with it. I let you leaving slip, but I'm not letting this slip. You love him too." I state. "I know that."

"It doesn't change anything! Why the hell did you let him come!? He belongs in _Konoha_!"

I laugh coldly again. "No. he doesn't, he belongs _with you_." I look him right in the eyes. "And if you can't see it, you belong with him."

"I need to be here. Whether I suit or not!"

"You are being a 5-year-old! GROW UP!" I spit out. Then regret it, I close my eyes. Great, now you've done it Sora. Who didn't chain up my mouth again?

That had hit a nerve, and I knew it would "How, how Sora, do _I_ need to grow up, I do recall you were the one who nearly gave herself a concussion on a counter-top?"

"I don't care _how_ you know about that, but I know I take care of the people I love, Sasuke. You don't. Grow up, stop seeking petty revenge," I pause, to make him look me in the eyes. "And most of all, _forget fucking Itachi_!" I rage took over, I had said the magic word. 'Itachi'. I knew there was no going back now.

"I can't Sora." He narrowed his eyes, deadly quiet, venom seeped into his voice. "And I won't until I see him in the same pain he caused me."

"You are causing more pain to Naruto now! Do you expect _him_ to hunt you down with a rifle or something? No. because he is not a stupid, self-obsessed bastard. Think about other people for once in your god-damned life, Sasuke."

"Like you, of course." He smirked, and I nearly screamed with agony. His smirking was horrible, he had a good blow coming and he knew it. "Where's Gaara now, then?"

That had hit the mark, I winced, and shuddered as if his words had rocked my being to the core, which, in everyway but physical pain (and it was cutting it close) they had.

"Don't even mention him." I breathe, I was so angry, I had never been this angry in my entire life. When mum left, I was sad, when Sasuke left, I was sadder, when Gaara left, I was depressed. This time I wasn't being the self-controlled person I had been of so many years. I was _angry_.

"Then don't mention Itachi, and we're even." The smirk didn't leave Sasuke's face. I didn't notice the tears on my cheeks until it was too late. I wiped them away angrily.

"You are the most _immature_, _self_-_centred_ _asshole_ I have ever met, Sasuke; God knows why I even waste my _breath_ on you. God knows why Naruto _wastes_ his _life_ on you." I turn, and take two steps away, meaning to go back to my dorm, then stop, and turn. "And because I know Naruto will never do this, I will."

And with that, I raised my fist and smashed it with all the effort I had into his face. I looked at him as he threw his hands to his eye, which would be black tomorrow.

"Now hopefully you can be as blind as you actually are for a few days." I spat at him, and then walked back to my dorm.

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**Ohhh. Somebody's annggrryyyy. Hehe. How are we all? Maybe I should go back to my posh mood, seeing as I think I spoiled the ending. Oh well. **

**How are we all today? THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING!! Pleeaasse reweiw, perty plleeaasee?**

**Anyway, I LOOBBEE YOOUU!! Love, to-love-is-to-lie**


	7. Venting Adventures

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**Chapter Seven: **

_Remember that happiness is a way of travel - not a destination.__ - __Roy M. Goodman_

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**Errgg. What have I done? I need to speak to Naruto. Now. But it's past curfew…. I'm trying anyway. **

Why why why. Why for the first time couldn't I control my stupid temper? Why did I hit him? I need to beg Naruto for forgiveness. I'm trying to sneak past hall patrol.

………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Damnit.**

I got caught. I'm wiping desks from 11 to 2 tomorrow. AHHH!! _I need to speak to Naruto_. He's only six dorms down and yet I can't damn-well make it past the monitors.

I stare at the ceiling, eyes on the dirty spot near the air-vent. Maybe…. Hmm. Could I?

………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4am. **

I have a new personal record on the stupid-meter. I can't believe I actually pulled that off. How? How did I? It feels like a crazy dream.

I had gotten a chair as soon as the idea struck, after flicking threw my diary, I'd found the page.

_**11:53 **_

_Maybe I can crawl through the vents. That would be fun. _

Inspiration had stuck. And I had gotten the tallest stool we had, stood on it and taken off the vent-cover, and crawled into the pipes. They were big enough for me to crawl through. On my hands-and-knee's I would make it. For the first time ever, I thanked the lord I was short.

I had scrambled up noisily into the large square passage, it was six rooms down… I can count that. On my hands and knee's and shuffled along the pipe, my high was keeping the fear away. Really, I think that hit to head I got was still with me, for I felt dizzy.

I got to room 5, and checked through the vent, everyone was fast asleep, I had actually gotten away without waking anyone up, I kept going, and looked down, and cursed. The opening was into Kimimaro's room. I sighed, and took the cover off anyway I am stealthy as a mongoose. I can do this.

Mind of the mongoose, mind of the mongoose, mind of the mongoose… I thought to myself hysterically as I lowered myself down onto his bedside table, watching him for any signs on waking.

I almost forgot to breathe, and then let out a sigh as my feet touched the carpet. And edged towards to door, opened it, and then slipped out, I was just opening Naruto's door when I started to actually breathe normally.

I immediately leaped for his bed, and shook him awake roughly. He sat up when he saw me and muttered 'Sora?' groggily.

"Naruto! I have something important to tell you! Listen, please be awake." I say, shaking him again.

"I'm dreaming, aren't I?" he muttered, rubbing his head. "How'd you get in after curfew?"

"I'll explain later, I've done something really stupid, Naruto." I sigh, and tell him the whole story, editing a few details to spare his feelings.

"He-he …he thought I was in Konoha?" he said blankly. "He didn't think I'd make it in…"

"I'm sorry, Naruto." I whispered.

He shook his head. "We expected this. We shouldn't be surprised."

"And… um… Naruto?"

"What?" he asked, I moved over so he could put his arm around me, we'd spent days recovering from being left by the people we love in this position, he knew it must be bad.

"I think I was a bit stupid…"

"What did you do?" he asked, eyes narrowing.

"I gave him a black-eye." I looked at the blanket sheepishly.

Naruto nearly chocked (on god knows what), and then burst into laughter. "What!?"

I looked shocked. "I punched him. In the face."

"Y-You, you punched h-him?" he burst into laughter again.

"Shhh! Keep it down!" I whisper angrily. "What's so funny?"

He wiped away tears of mirth. "I just didn't think you had it in you."

I narrow my eyes. "You should have known better, then."

He became serious. "I do, now, for sure."

I sigh, looking at the blanket again. "I probably shouldn't have, though."

"No, you shouldn't have. But he still deserved it, what'd he say, anyway?"

Pain flashed across my face, and Naruto instantly knew he defiantly deserved it. What did he say, Sora." He said seriously now.

I repeat the conversation to him, and Naruto hugs me closer. "I'm sorry, Sora. But good job. He deserved the black eye." He grinned again. "Still can't believe you did that."

I glower. "It's not that funny."

"Yes it is." He laughed again. His happiness is contagious, and I grin too. Naruto and I know everything about each other, the smallest hint of any emotion is plain for either of us. We notice everything about one-another.

Well, I guess that's why best friends are for.

After a while, I snuck back into Kimimaro's room, and Naruto helped me up onto the bed-side table and back into the vent. There was a scary moment when Kimimaro rolled over, but then he went back to sleeping peacefully.

When I returned to my room, there was only two hours until sunrise, but thankfully it was Saturday so I could relax. And now I'm here. Writing this.

Well. I'm sure that conversation is something both Sasuke and I wouldn't forget. But I have to find a way to worm my way out of his bad books.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Saturday **

I slept in until 3pm. Stayed in bed until Naruto came in and made me get up.

"Just tell me something, Sora." He said, sitting on the edge of my bed.

"Sure."

"Did you actually come into my room through the venting system and tell me you punched Sasuke in the face at 4 in the morning?" he shook his head. "God that sounds strange."

I laugh. "Hate to say it, but yes I did."

Naruto makes a face. "Hm, we'll have to fix some stuff up then."

"No, Naruto, I've been thinking…" He raised his eyebrows as if that was strange, and I hit him in the shoulder. "I think I know why he was angry when I brought you here."

"And?"

"Well, I reckon he knows that you are the only person on this earth who could sway him from his chosen path."

Naruto cocked his head to one side. I roll my eyes. "He's scared of you; he knows he loves you enough that to see you in pain would make him immediately run home. It's going to be harder now."

"Oh…" he seemed to be withholding a happy-dance. I knew he was so happy to hear they still loved each other. "Well, when do I get to see him?"

"As soon as I suss out his time-table..." I frown. "It'll be hard to get you two in the same room. you managed to pick all the classes he's not in. Only _you _could do that!" I grumble.

"I wouldn't put it past you, so what have we gotta do?"

I grin. "We just have to get you to seduce him now."

He glares. "Well, your paying for the lingerie." And with that, the tension eased and we both broke into fits of laughter. Hope had rekindled itself, even if I had punched it in the face.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Sunday 7/2/18 – spent today sitting on Naruto's couch while he slept in. seems he was up all night worrying too. **

Kimimaro sat down next to me. And frowned. "I had a strange dream, the other night." I look at him, strangely. And then held up my hand.

"Wait." I moved the glass table away and surrounded myself with pillows. "Okay, go." I grin, and he grinned back, then stopped. It seemed I got to see one of his inner-fights. He didn't mean to grin then.

"Well, you were standing on my bed-side table, and Naruto was there, and he said something about… about finding Sasuke Uchiha." He frowned. Then shook his head. "Crazy dream."

I was pale, I knew I was. "Wow. Yeah… strange." I curse. When I actually need it my lying-stealth-skills fail, I knew he would have picked my lie if he had of thought my crawling through the vents was possible.

His eyes were on mine, assessing, confused about my blush. Wait, my blush!? I went redder. Erg. My _everything_ goes spaz when I'm around him.

I shake my head. "Well, I better be off before I do anything stupid. Tell Naruto to come around when he wakes up."

Kimimaro smirked, and inclined his head, he seemed slightly disappointed I was leaving, but I reminded myself of my promise, and kept walking.

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**Monday 8/2/18 – hahaha. **

Sasuke seems to attract insane fangirls. Like I attract invisible sad people with drug addictions.

I really do prefer my problem. Anyway, he had a massive black eye, it ran all the way above his eyebrow down to his cheekbones. I wince. Wow. I didn't think I had it in me, either.

The fan girls scream around him "What happened!? Sasuke-kun!? We'll get whoever hurt you, trust us." I let out a bark of laughter at this, being defended by fangirls, how sad…his head turns at the sounds of my laughter, I think it was automatic. I doubt he meant to do that.

When he saw me his face turned cold, and he turned around again, the fangirls turned to see what he had been looking at, but I had the sense to be gone by that time.

I kinda regret losing my temper, I miss him, but I know he doesn't stay angry for long. And now we're even for when he broke my rib.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**In my dorm. Boredboredbored. **

Tayuya seems to be stalked too, except I'm worried, because she is stalked by three girls especially. Naruto hears more gossip then me, because he can find friends and the such, he says they are whores that follow Tayuya.

People call them her 'Doki'. I reckon she has a dog-whistle for them. Hahaha. Anyway, they are those type of people who shouldn't exist because they are so pretty.

Anyway, Naruto is working on switching his classes to be in some of Sasuke, if I'm only in one, and Naruto is in all the others, he must be in the rest, I start trying to swap tomorrow too.

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**HEELLLOOO!! Running outa time. Gotta go. LOVE YOU ALL!! Please review. I shall love you forever. Again. Hehe. Enjoy chappie. LOVE TO-LOVE-IS-TO-GOTTA-RUN-BEFCAUSE-I'M-LATE!!!**


	8. Plans

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**Chapter Eight: **

_It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'__ - __Sam Levenson_

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**Boredboredbored. SO BORED! Hmm…. Wonder if I can learn to travel through vents. **

I know I'll get smashed if I get caught, but I am so bored I am willing to try. Okay, if I die in there, whoever reads this should tell Hanuro Sakura she can have my shoes.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Wow. **

I never knew so much could be done through a venting system. Naruto was so happy to see me, he nearly yelled 'SOORRAA!!' at the tope of his lungs. Kimimaro had been on the couch so I could slip past nicely.

Naruto had inspected the vent "How in the name of Sasuke's Giant head do you fit in there?"

"Short-ness, member?" I said, looking at the vent. "I can crawl through there without much trouble at all."

"Awesome. You have access to like the whole school. Can you-"

"No. no muffins, I'm not going to the Cafeteria." I scold, he looks disappointed, and we head out to raid the fridge.

Kimimaro looks surprised. "I didn't see you come in." he frowns, and I could feel myself blush and prayed he wouldn't put two and two together.

"Oh, I'm practically invisible, you wouldn't notice me anyway." I assure him, Naruto rolls his eyes.

"Depending on what she runs into." He finished, opening in the fridge, I glare and shut the door on his head.

"OW!" he whines. I stick my tongue out at him, and grin at Kimimaro, who is still looking wary.

He shakes his head and turns back to his book, and Naruto and I go to his room to plan another 'subtly and accidentally run into Sasuke' session.

"..Okay, so, if I change classes to-"

I hold up my hand, an idea had struck. "Wait…." I pause, thinking. "Hey, ever thought we might not have to do that?"

"What?" he asked, suspicious at the grin on my face.

"I think if we tread carefully, we can make Sasuke come to us…" I say, eyes twinkling.

"You know sora, at times you could pass for a brilliant military mastermind." He said, smiling too. "So, when are_ you_ changing classes?"

I nod "Tomorrow. You stay in yours." I grimace. "Let's see which way he runs."

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Five minutes later **

In conclusion: as you can see, I came out of my venting expedition fine, and I think this whole situation will be improved heaps with a little help from my friend venty.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Tues – 9/2/18**

In Arts we are doing more druggie-artist work. It's surprisingly boring without Tsnuade and her swearing. You know, colourful language makes everything more interesting when it comes from teachers.

I switched Biology and Chemistry classes (saying I had a problem with the Sensei) but I hesitated on science, I didn't mind sitting with Kimimaro and I don't want to ruin the one class I have with somebody I like.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Wednesday – 10/2/18**

Sasuke has run, I repeat, Sasuke has run. If he wasn't in my Chem class, and he wasn't in Naruto's (before) he must be in my old one. We had Naruto switch to mine today, so he'll be there tomorrow, just in case Sasuke changed to his class by some strange accident.

We are so cool. Outsmarting the Uchiha genius. Hahaha. I feel strangely proud.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**I knew it couldn't last long…**

I had taken the hallway route to Naruto's dorm for a change, nearly gotten run over, and knocked on the door, Naruto looked genuinely surprised to see me walking, I roll my eyes at his face and come in.

"Hello loves." I say, putting my coat on the counter, The Man with Seven chins is out often, you know.

I turn to Kimimaro. "Hey, where's the fat one?"

He snorts with laugher, and I flush, realizing I'd said that out loud. "He's with Tayuya, Kidomaru and Kabuto." He said.

I frown. "I really don't like the idea of all of them in the same place…" I say slowly, then shake it off and go to Naruto's room.

"Hey, does Kimimaro ever get out?" I ask, as I close the door.

"Not really."

"Why?"

"Dunno, ask him yourself." He blows my question off. "He doesn't do anything exercise-wise either."

I frown. "Strange…" then shake the curiosity off. "So, back to Sasuke…"

After our chat, I had sighed and ventured out to go back to my dorm, of course, I am pissed off now because I had tried extra hard not to fall over the pot-plant, but in my extreme concentration (while looking at my feet), I ran into the door.

Now I have a nice bruise forming on my forehead. What-s'is-name- I mean, Kimimaro laughed, he didn't even try to cover it this time.

I glared at him while gathering what was left of my dignity and stormed from the room.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Thurs 11/10/18 **

I'm really nervous. Like, really. I can feel the importance of today. Sasuke is going to see Naruto, fall madly back in love, and run home.

And I can go find Gaara. It's all gonna be over today.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Nothing happened**

We can't find Sasuke. He must be in the class Naruto isn't in. I move now to Naruto's class and he moves to the blank one. DAMNIT!!! We need an extra person. Sasuke will keep getting away.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Naruto came over**

"Okay, screw the red lingerie idea." He muttered moodily while I made coffee.

"Let's try hot pink next time." I suggest. "Black trimming would look awesome too."

He glares. "Don't joke."

I roll my eyes and hand him the coffee cup. "Fine. Well, what's the plan?"

"Change your science class, I'll move back to my old one." He said.

"Ohh… Science? Do I _have_ to?" I groan.

"Yes."

"Fine." I grumble, seeing no room in that '_yes_' for argument.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Friday 12/2/18**

Changed science. That office lady is going to get fed up eventually with hearing I was emotionally abused by the teacher.

Come Monday I'm in another science… great. Not even Kimimaro to make sure I don't explode myself.

Can one even explode themselves?

…

I'm sure I'd pull it off.

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**HELLOOO!! Sorry for such a short update, but at least I got it to you!!! I LURRRVE YOU FOR REVIEWING!!! Please, continue with your amazing-ness!!!! **

**Hehe. You guys don't give yourself enough credit. Seriously, stop lurving me and start saying 'I lurve me. Thanks for me. Yay! MEEE!!' you deserve it. **

**Anyhoo, I lurve you eternally, lurve to-love-is-to-lie**


	9. Chocolate Hearts

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**Chapter Nine:**

_We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh.__ - __Agnes Repplier_

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**Saturday 13/2/18**

I spent the day with Kimimaro, surprisingly, we sat down- well, he sat, I lay on the floor, as one does, naturally- and just talked, really.

"You moved from my science, didn't you?" he asked.

"Yeah, sorry about that." I apologize. "But I have to be in the other class."

"I don't mind. I'll just have to choose one of the girls to be my lab partner."

"I'm sure they'd be fine with that. Your fanclub will most likely reject her though. They will be jealous as hell."

"Great."

"Do me a favour, pick the annoying blonde one." I tell him. He grins.

"I'll try."

"So, what are you studying?" I ask, propping my chin on my hands, and focusing my blue eyes on him.

"Teaching, science." He said, grinning. I had no idea why, so I just smiled back.

"Awesome." I said. "Why'd you wanna teach?" I ask, wrinkling my nose at the idea.

"I want to be able to pass on knowledge. Do the same to people as Orochimaru-Sensei has done for me, I want to be principal here one day." He looked wistfully around the room.

Anger rose in my chest as I heard the name 'Orochimaru' "You want to take after the snake-rapist?" I mutter angrily.

"Don't call him that." He whispered, his voice barely audible, his eyes burnt into mine. I could tell I had hit a soft spot. What the hell did he owe Orochimaru?

I shrug, trying to shake off the uneasiness. "Just don't abduct small children, okay? You don't know the trouble it causes." I mutter.

The corner of his mouth twitched, and I sigh relief. He is scary when he is angry. "I'll try not too."

"That's all I ask." I grin.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**11:00 I just vent-wayed to Naruto's dorm**

Kimimaro is getting more suspicious about how I can just 'slip' past him all these times. I just laugh it off and pull his cheek or pat his head patronizingly.

"Okay, so what happens if we still can't find him?" I ask, sitting on Naruto's bed.

"We know he's psychic and go back to the plan with the red lingerie."

"Great. But like I said, I think hot pink would be much more alluring-"

"Like I said, don't joke."

"You started it." I grumble, and then sigh. "How long do you think this'll take?" I ask, I said it as if I was wondering for Sasuke's sake, but I was really thinking about Gaara, my mind was wandering.

"I don't know." He said, sighing, he fell back on his bed and I lay next to him, we stared at the roof. Suddenly he turned to me, looking into my eyes, a kind of guilty pleading look in them, I grinned back, confused. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"What?" I ask, tilting my head to one side.

"For keeping you here. I know you want to go."

I shake my head. "I'm here for you. I _want_ to be here." I lied confidently.

He shook his head. "No, you don't. Don't lie." He said sadly. "It's just I can't …. I'm afraid, to do anything without you."

I smile, and took his hand. "Don't worry. It'll be fine. I'm here for as long as you need me."

"You know how bad I feel?" he said softly. "I know you're in exactly the same situation as I am, except you don't even know where he is, or if he's safe, or what he's doing…"

"I can deal." And then I took a deep breath to say the biggest lie I had ever told. "He wouldn't mean as much to me as Sasuke does to you anyway."

I think, only because this lie was bigger then any I have ever told, and would ever tell, that he believed it, because there is a point where lies get so huge you wouldn't ever think one would say them. This was one of them.

"You sure?"

"I'm sure." I repeat, swallowing. I knew the most important thing was to keep him from saying it. Saying 'go find him. I'll manage.' Because as soon as he did, I wouldn't be able to stop myself. I'd run. And I'd run and wouldn't feel an ounce of regret. But, twenty years from now I'd look back in agony and die inside for ever running out on Naruto. No matter what he said.

"Because if you aren't, you know I'm not keeping you her-"

"NO!" I almost yell. "I mean, no, your not. But I am. I promised and I want to stay." I lie again. It seemed to be getting easier with each lie, as if I already had 100kilo's of extra weight in deception, why not another 20 or so more?

He seemed to just accept it this time, and nodded. "Thankyou, Sora. I wouldn't be able to get him back without you." I smile, and he grins back, his blue eyes shining, and as I look into them I'm reminded why I'm here. For those eyes. For Naruto.

After a while, I VENTured back (Hahahaha. I'm quite the comedian), and found the man with 7 chins with Tayuya.

I shudder, trying not to picture him drowning people in his flab. And go into my dorm.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**11:04 **

OHMYGOD!!! DO YOU EVEN REALIZE WHAT TOMORROW IS!?!!!! DO YOU!!!??

…

I didn't think so.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:06**

oh. Suspense. Leaving you hanging.

………………………………………………………………………………………….

**11:08**

I can't take it! I have to tell you.

…. It…. is…

…

VALENTINES DAY!!! OHNOOO!!!!

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:11**

I better get some chocolate for Naruto.

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**14/2/18 **

HAPPY VALENTINO DAYS MON AMIGO! (Which is a mix of French, Spanish, something else & Sora languages) hehehe. Anyhoo, I have a chocolate heart for Naruto, and he better have something chocolaty and goodness-filled for me too!

…Otherwise I'm eating his.

.……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4:56**

How could he? He had nothing of chocolaty value! Though, he is good with excuses.

I had walked down to his dorm, and he had come out with a bright smile. "Hello Sora!" he beamed at me.

I grinned back "HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!" I yell, and, just to be sure, I keep the precious chocolate in my pocket.

The "Wha?" I got in reply wasn't convincing that he deserved the deliciousness hidden in my jeans.

…. Yuck. Not as suss as it sounds. Yuck yuck yuck.

Anyhoo, I frowned. "You didn't… forget, did you?" I ask, mock-hurt on my face.

He looked around desperately for an excuse. "No! no, I just… decided, Valentines day was one that… erm, didn't need material thanks! I mean, there was that time that me and Sasuke gave you six years worth." He reminded me. I roll my eyes.

"Oh, okay! Well, if Valentines day doesn't need material thanks…" I pull out the chocolate, and pout. "I'll just have to give this to someone else…" I sigh dramatically, and naruto's eyes widen.

"NOOO!"

I look up, grinning. "Noo? So you _are _celebrating with material thanks? You got me something?" I hint.

He pales. "Er… well…"

I sigh again. "Well, I'm sure somebody else is celebrating with material thanks," I pout again, as if in thought. "Oh! I know!" I had been about to say 'me!' but then Kimimaro strode into view, and I grinned. This would be even better. "Kimimaro-dearest!" I said with over-cheer.

"Yes?" he asked, looking down at me strangely.

"Happy Valentines day!" I say in a sing-song voice, Naruto's jaw almost hit the floor and he swore at me, I turned around to poke my tongue out at him.

After giving a chockie heart to a surprised Kimimaro, I skipped out, and Naruto followed, telling me that just because he wasn't celebrating with Material gifts doesn't mean I should abandon my beliefs.

I laugh "Gosh, you take Valentines Day so seriously."

He grumbled. "Nah, I just wanted chocolate." He mumbles.

I grin. "What was that, Naruto?" I say, cupping my ear.

He scowls. "Nothing." And goes back to his room to sulk in peace over not getting tasty valentines chocolate.

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**Hello my loves (no, I'm not lying. My name must be because I truly do lurrve you all) sorry for not updating in a while!!! THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING!!! Pleeaase reveeiww!!! I love themmm!!! **

**Xoxoxoxo, to-love-is-to-lie**


	10. Bald Pigeons are the Worst

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**Chapter Ten: **

_Dance like it hurts, Love like you need money & Work when people are watching – Scott Adams _

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**Ohmmyy. It seems to be raining. **

Seems to me that Kimimaro has a fanclub too. My sad valentines 'gift' was put aside, but it was hard to pay attention too a chocolate heart when there was masses of roses next to it.

My eyes widen. "Whoa." I say, blinking at the massive pile. "What exploded in here?"

He shrugged. "Fangirls?"

"Hahahaha. Fangirls are made of roses and plastic goo." I laugh, Kimimaro looks at me strangely and I laugh more. "So if you peeled off their outside, the inside would be like, conversation hearts." I grin.

He smiles back, confused, so I launch into my logic about how fan-girls must be made of conversation hearts seeing as they are kinda short and plastic-looking.

He raises an eyebrow and shakes his head, I sigh. "God, boys don't get anything." I mutter angrily. He laughs at this.

"Valentines day is so boring." I complain after a while.

Kimimaro doesn't talk much, but I'm used to that. I mean, look at Sasuke, he hardly talked, and I punched him in the face. Everything works out fine.

"I dunno…" he looked at the pile of disgustingly colourful and sweet-smelling flowers and candy.

"Yeah, but for the rest of us who don't get mounds of love from people in the form of deliciousness, its boring." I tell him, scowling at the pile of devotion from fangirls.

He grins. "You can take it, if you want."

I shake my head. "It's not the same." I sigh, dramatically. "I'm sure it would taste better if it was given with love and devotion." I grin.

He rolls his eyes and we sit and devour plastic stuff until we feel sick and he takes up the couch so I'm forced to lie on the floor and stare at the ceiling.

"It's strange, you know." I grin. "Naruto and I were only just barely friends until this day two years ago."

"Hm?" Kimimaro asked.

"Well, he and Sa-sam! A friend of ours." I was about to say 'sasuke' but then thought better of it, but it was a bit late, Kimimaro already had raised his eyebrows at me questioningly, I shrugged. "Anyway, they wanted me to do them a favour and help them out with family matters, and since _Sam_'s family is disgustingly rich he bought about a million valentines and had them delivered every period." I laugh. "And then I got all the chocolates and stuffed them in his locker. When he saw me ten minutes later he was covered in melted pink chocolate. I couldn't stop laughing." I had to stop talking there, because the memory was painful, the best pain there was, addictive, almost, but still pain.

Kimimaro grins. "I love it when you talk. You talk different to other people."

I raise an eyebrow, too. "As far as I can tell, I speak the same language as you all."

"No, but you _speak_ different, you speak with emotion, you forget you weren't there yourself."

I smile. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should." He said, nodding.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Monday 15/2/18 **

Everyone is either superhappyamamazingsmilyperson because they got a Valentine, or superscowlyangryperson because they didn't. Naruto was the latter.

"What is wrong, Naruto!?" I ask angrily, he had been sulking.

He scowls. "Nothing. Go get to Human Mind." he insisted moodily.

. "Seriously, if you are still mad that Kimimaro got the chocolate I will go get you another one!" I call after him as he walks off.

I haven't mentioned HM (Human Mind) have I? Well, it's a mix of Philosophy, Logic, and things like Therapy and the such. It's usually boring, and they obsess about trivial things like 'who are you?' and 'where did the world come from?' too much.

In my opinion there are more important things, as far as we know we only live once, and if we waste it on finding out how the world was made, especially since it doesn't really matter because it was a long while ago, it seems wrong.

To me, the most important thing is not _to be_ loved, but _to_ love, because if nobody loved nobody _could_ be loved in the first place. Human beings have wrecked so much of our world; the only thing left in us that is good is our ability to love. I think that is the only thing that keeps the world from just exterminating us full stop.

Anyway! Human Mind is usually boring, unless a good topic comes up, which is rarely.

Today I was actually thinking as I tuned out to our Sensei as he made the stupids (aka, students) think over-muchly about what really created the earth.

Memories, they hurt, but I can't stop thinking about them. Everything is a reminder of the past, and I know, right down to my very bone, it is _never_ good idea to make your past part of your future, but I can't help it.

It's so addictive, like I'm so obsessed over not forgetting, it's like wonderful pain. Glorious in the fact it's a sweet, bitter reminder of times you took for granted. It's like remembering tears you apart, but so rapidly, that you don't notice.

It's like smoking, you can keep inhaling dangerous chemicals, and not feel the difference, but three years later, you will. When it's too late to turn back, you realize your mistake.

I know my mistake, and I can turn back, but I don't want too, I want to keep staring into the massive black abyss that I look upon to fondly. I take care of it, as if I leave it for more then a few days it might disappear, and memories from when I was whole, from when I had everything in the world one could want.

I'll never forgive myself for taking that for granted. So everyday, I curse myself about taking those days for granted, and two years from now, I'll do the same about now. It's an endless circle, a whirlpool, and I have the chance to steer clear of it now.

But I can't. It would mean letting go of Gaara for the time being, and concentrating on Sasuke, but I can't. They both have to be with me, I can't choose one or the other. I don't work like that. They are both an essential part of my makeup. Of whom I am.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Five mins laterss.**

I think Human Mind is turning me Emo. Maybe I should change classes.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Two mins laters. **

Nah. I think the office ladies hate me enough already.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Tues Arvo. **

Both Naruto and I haven't seen a TRACE of Sasuke, and we had switched English classes (after discussing class switches in the _official_ place – my dorms kitchen) and we still haven't found ANYTHING.

After finding my Kitchen wasn't as inspirational as usual, we retreated to the couch in Naruto's dorm.

"Where, oh where is he?" I whine. "How can he keep avoiding us!?"

"Dunno. But we'll find him somewhere…" Naruto said, he was laying upside-down on the couch, head falling over the bottom and resting on the carpet floor.

We sit around sighing for a while, before I retreat back to my dorm to sleep on the problem.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Wednesday 17/2/18 **

Switched another class. The Office ladies are getting REALLY pissed off now, we need to wait for the new one to start taking shifts before we make another change.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**6pm **

Naruto came over to my dorm, and we sat on the kitchen table drinking Lemonade from the bottle.

"Okay, I switch English, you change Math and I go to the other Art. We haven't tried that. And that's the first class I found him in." I say, taking another swig from the bottle.

"Nah, let's move me to Science, you to Math."

"No way!"

"Yes way!"

"Nup. I go to English, or I aint going nowhere." I say stubbornly.

He muttered angrily, and then nodded. "Fine. Deal."

At that point, Tayuya entered, looking smug and gave us a 'I'm better then you' glance and then shuffled off to her room. We watch her go with raised eyebrows. She is quite the strange one.

But not me-strange, not the 'run into doors in moments of intense concentration while avoiding pot-plants' strange, the 'creepy popular dero' strange.

I don't know which one I'd rather be…

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Monday 22/2/18 **

AHHH!!! I'M GONNA GO INSANE!!! We have been changing classes like there is no tomorrow!! And we STILL can't find him!!!

He is the mongoose of the social world. Like Naruto is the Pigeon.

… Don't mongooses eat pigeons?

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**11:14 **

Maybe I should warn Naruto.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**11:20 **

Maybe Sasuke isn't a Mongoose. More like an insane parrot you find in pet shops that go mad after saying '_Polly wanna cracker_!' too much, and end up screaming hoarsely & crazily at passing shoppers '_POLLY WANTS A FUCKING CRACKER ALREADY_!'

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**11:23**

Bet they would still eat a Pigeon like Naruto. Especially a balding one.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Wednesday 24/2/18 **

I'm seriously going to go insane if nothing happens. I need to see improvement. Need to. Seeing nothing happening is like hell, I need to see things happening because it shows that it's another step along to getting to Gaara.

But nothing is happening. Things need to happen. And soon.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**HEELLOOO! Wassup all? I'M GETTING KAYAKS!!! Woohoo! Kayaks! IT'S GONNA BE AWESOME! Hehe, so, I'm assuming your all good? Nobody is in luurve? Because if you are, you have my DEEPEST sympathies. Anyway, past that, hope you liked ze chappie and hope you are happy! **

**Love to-love-is-to-lie (no, not lying ;) )**

**p.s. since no A/N is complete without it –REEVIIIEEWW!**


	11. Letters

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Chapter Eleven: **

_Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better.__ - __Anonymous_

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Thursday 25/2/18 – ohmyyy. Two months till my B'day. **

Yess!!! NEWS!!! For once we have a trail to follow! SASUKE HAS BEEN SPOTTED! Last time we were in Ze Room of Inspirational Plans ( R.I.P.) we had nearly called the police after convincing ourselves that Sasuke was actually dead.

Then we came to our senses.

Anyway! We had abandoned the R.I.P. and gone to the Thinking Couch (located in Naruto's dorm) and sat down to think.

After a while I had snapped. "WHERE THE FUCKING HELL IN THIS FUCKING SCHOOL IS SASUKE!?" I had yelled, kicked a footrest across the room angrily.

Naruto soothed me with smoothies and chocolate. "Shh… calm. 'Calamity calm calm calm', as _you_ would say." He said, grinning.

I glare. "That is really _quite_ infuriating." I mutter.

"I know." He said, laughing.

"That still doesn't tell us where Sasuke is hiding. How the hell has he avoided our searches!? There are only 3 science classes, and he can't not take science." I say moodily.

"Maybe he is still unbelievably lucky and is swapping at the exact time." Naruto suggested.

"Yeah, totally." I snort.

After a while, Kimimaro immerged. "Hate to say I was listening in, but is this Sasuke Uchiha?" he asked.

There was no point in denying it; Naruto's mad stuttering gave us away already. "Yep." I say, sighing.

Naruto glared, Kimimaro just sat down. "I don't know why you want to find him, but he was in my Science yesterday." He said, facing me, I look up, eyes alight.

"Oh, really?" I ask.

"Yes."

"Care to help us out a tiny bit, old chum?" I ask, grinning.

Naruto mouthed angrily, too agast to say anything, I hit his shoulder. "WHAT!?" he choked out.

"Hm?" Kimimaro asked.

I smile brightly at Kimimaro. "Excuse us for a moment." I drag Naruto into his dorm. "Naruto you idiot! There are _three_ classes, with _three_ people we would be UNSTOBBABLE!"

"But-but-but-"

"NO! No 'but's. This is the perfect plan!"

"He can't _know_!"

"Who says he will? All he needs to do is tell us if Sasuke was in his class. And we switch."

"But don't you think he'll be suspicious? We do we care about that kid that came half way through year 10?"

"I trust him. Okay? This is the only plan we've got, and unless you think of something better in the next ten minutes I'm adding him onto our Sasuke-watch." I say, putting my hands on my hips and glaring.

"Sora, think about what your doing!"

"I have, and I am. We'll just keep going around in circles until his psychic-ness slips and we catch him, but who knows how long that will take! All year maybe!" I shudder at the thought. Luckily Naruto mistakes it as a fear of the office ladies, which I have too, but not seeing Gaara before Christmas is a bigger fear.

Naruto paused, and took a deep breath, thinking, eyes narrow and then sighed. "I don't trust it, but okay."

I smile brightly. "This is finally _going _somewhere!" I practically bounced out to Kimimaro, who was waiting on the couch, looking confused. "Kimimaro!" I call.

"Hm?" he asks.

"Hey, can you do me a favour?" I ask, smiling.

"Depends." He replied, eyebrow raised, I grin. Of course.

"Well, if Sasuke is in your class any time, think you can tell us?"

"Um, sure." He said, looking freaked out, I smile so brightly and the exitment over takes me and I leap on him and hug him madly.

"THANKYOOUU!!!" I yell, and with that, I bounce out the door to leave a nice awkward silence between Naruto and Kimimaro.

So I left that afternoon skipping down the hall, when nothing was happening things were almost unbearable, it was like being stuck in Emotional Jelly. I couldn't move. Now I am out of the Emotional Jelly and into the Emotional quick-sand, which I much prefer because it goes quickly. Suffocation by Emotional Jelly is a slow, painful death.

YESS!!! GAARA HERE I COME!!!!

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Sat 27/2/18 - Yayy!!**

YYAYY!!! Naruto is the holy mail-man. We share a locker (costs less) and he always checks for mail, and our stupid friends never write. But Sakura & Shika sent a letter!

Naruto and I yelled frantically, he had come running into my dorm at full speed (not bothering to knock and getting a dirty look from Tayuya) and hugged me screaming "MAILMAILMAIL!" of course, at this I went insane and danced too until we retreated to my room and argued over who got to open it.

Naruto and I wrestled over the letter until we agreed that he got to open and I got to read (aloud). I watched in anticipation as he broke the seal and then his look of excitement changed to annoyance. "Trust Shika." He muttered, and handed me a separate envelope titled '_Sora_' I laugh, knowing Naruto wanted to read mine as well.

There were two letters inside, I knew one would be from Shika, and another from Sakura, I knew one would contain latest gossip from sakura and the other would be information about how people were going (because Shika is perceptive and listens to his heart not the latest scandal.)

I unfolded the paper and read the letter that was written in Shika's neat cursive writing:

_Sora,_

_We decided since you haven't written to us, we'd write to you_ (Ha! WE didn't write to THEM? Pfft. We were waiting for them to write first!) _I sent this separate seeing as I know it would piss Naruto off_ (god he's mean) _and also know that you two would have a shouting match over who got to open the envelope. _

_Of course, you both get too, this way. Everything is good here, Sakura and I are doing amazing and Kakashi and Iruka said 'best of luck' with your 'mission'. They say it's a long shot but it's worth it. _

_Ino is taking over the flower business, not going to Fashion School after all, she seems quite happy being single, surprisingly. _

_Kakashi and Iruka are doing well, their secret is still safe, but people are getting the hunch and don't seem to care. Everyone remembers you here, you know. They remember the big stand you created and have left Kakashi and Iruka alone, I did try to tell them that once but they didn't pay attention. _

_Anyway, I hope your well, and thankyou. You've done so much, I really hope you find Gaara soon. _

_Love, _

_Shika. _

_P.S. Write back _

_P.S.S. ignore anything Sakura says, I tried to stop her writing most of it, but couldn't._

I laugh at that last comment and smile at his letter affectionately before moving onto Sakura's. It was hard to read, as she'd dotted all the 'i's with hearts and made her letters curly, I sigh, and she was always trying so hard.

_HEY SORA!_

_Wassup, Honey? I hope you're all good! Because I am, I love Shika, he is a darling. I don't know what I'd do without him, Sora, I really don't. How I survived before he went anorexic and I was being bashed up I don't know. It's been a miracle; I can never thank you enough!_

_Anyway! I know Shika's letter will be boring, so I will include all the goss, love! I know you dying to hear about it! Well, Ino hasn't gone to Fashion school, ha! I bet she didn't get good marks. Anyway, according to my intuition she is miserable! I bet she is totally jealous of Shika and I. She doesn't want to be single at all. _

_Kakashi and Iruka say Hi, and everyone knows about them. Everyone. And boy, are they talking! Seriously, you wonder if people have forgotten about the fuss you created over Sasuke and Naruto! _

_I told them you say hi, because I know you do. Anyway, I LOVEEE YOU!! Keep sane. Well, as sane as you can keep, Sora-darrling. _

_Good luck with finding Sasuke, slap him a few times for me. _

_Love you lots, _

_Sakura _

_P.S. WRITE BACK!!! Tell me about the boy who starts with G and ends with A. have you seen him? TELL MEE!!!_

I laugh at hers, seeing it was the complete opposite of Shika's I knew I trusted Shika more with people, seeing as he notices everything. Sakura is hilarious though, and she will be absolutely gob-smacked to know I actually did slap him for her. hehe. And her complete failure at subtlety at the end with the 'Gaara' thing. I sigh, and reach for a pen and paper.

Naruto is laughing too, I grin. "Sakura?" I ask.

He laughs more. "Hers is the _complete_ opposite of Shika's!" he grins. "I really do love them both."

I nod. "Me too," I hand him some paper. "Get writing! They deserve a good letter!"

It took me a while to think of a decent response, and after a while I just decided to give up and tell them everything that had happened. My writing is so messy, I'll be surprised if they can read it. oh well, they (being Sakura) spent six months copying my HSC notes and reading (being Shika) over my answers to check if their right.

_Hello all, _

_Weellll. Everything is semi-awesome here. Though there is an evil pot-plant that seems to be plotting (HAHAHAHA! I'm so funny! Get it? POT-plant? PLOTTING? It's nearly the same so it's funny) my death. Seriously, I trip over it every time I get out of Naruto's dorm. _

_You didn't write for ages! I expected updates every week! And that was a PATHETIC letter! There is an awesome guy here Sakura, he is very hot, you would be jealous. He has seven chins. Mmhmm. Sexy. (Be jealous Shika! AND GROW SOME CHINS!) _

_Yarr, Naruto's dorm consists off Kimimaro, who is totally awesome and rad and is my buddyyy, and the man with seven chins, who is the opposite and swallows innocent children with his flab. _

_In my dorm is Tayuya, who Sakura would get along with. (hehehehe) she plays flute and is here on a music scholarship. She is a whore. I hate her, and she keeps on giving me and Naruto dirty looks and listening in on our conversations._

_Anyway, we are trying to find Sasuke, he seems to be invisible. Not Sora-invisible, more just superman-invisible. I think he hasn't been telling us something. Next thing we know he'll have red eyes and will breathe fire. _

_Hahahahah. Dragon-sasuke. Anyway! You will find this part ESPECIALLY entertaining Shika, because while Naruto hasn't seen Sasuke yet, I had a lovely conversation with him that ended up with him having a practically broken nose. I am actually quite proud, even if he doesn't speak to me ever again, I will rest peacefully knowing I've achieved my life goal. Punch Sasuke in the face. _

_Hehe, Anyhoo! Spent days in hell, we have a pervert math teacher who is like Kakashi but 80, which makes it ten times worse. People like that should die at 45, because 45 is the best age for a rapist, creepy enough to be creepy, but young enough to still have genitals that function. Hehehe. _

_Anyway, I have discovered vents are fun too, and have had many ad__**vent**__ures (hahah, hilarity again! I am on a roll!) plus, I can get to naruto's dorm when it's past curfew. Very proud. _

_Anyway, I have given myself a minor concussion ONLY ONCE! And have been learning nothing, fancy schools don't give you the education you paid for! Just free sex from the Rapist-Sensei and co.  
Anyway! Feeling good, hug Kakashi Iruka Ino (for the hell of it) madly for me, and tell them I luurrvvee them. _

_Lot's of hugs, _

_Love Sora. _

_p.s. you two are both QUITE hilarious. But write longer letters next time! AND WRITE BACK __QUICK_

I re-read this a couple of times, then put it in an envelope and put that in the other envelope. Naruto was scribbling his reply hastily, I sigh, knowing they would have to get Iruka (as he knows how to de-code Naruto's writing) to read it to them.

I walk Naruto to the mail-box, and we chatter on about how we'll go visit in the holidays.

"I wanna see how pink Sakura has made Shika's house." I laugh.

"Their both at Konoha College, right?" Naruto responds, thinking.

"Yeah, Shika is a super-brain, so he could get in here _eaassy_. But didn't, he really loves Sakura, you know."

"Duh." Naruto rolls his eyes. "I can see that."

"We have so many scandalous couples around. I seriously hope life as an elderly person isn't this exiting, I may suffer a heart-attack at this rate." I say seriously, Naruto laughs, and slings his arm around my shoulders.

"Seriously Sora, I really don't know what I'd do without you."

I pat the hand that was resting on my collarbone. "Well, you won't have to worry. We'll find Sasuke, together."

Naruto sighs. "Yes, and after that, I don't know what I'd do without you. I really can't imagine life without you now."

I grin at him, guiltily. "I'm very flattered." I say, avoiding the subject of 'after we find Sasuke.'

He looks at me, smiling sadly. Then shakes his head. "Now, I bet you 10 bucks that their next letter will be in like seven months."

"No way!" I shake my head. "Shika'll write back."

"Nup."

"Wanna lose ten bucks?"

"Shake on it!"

I offer a hand, and we shake, grinning, both certain we'll win. "See, they won't write back till at least next month."

"It's on, I am gonna be ten bucks richer!" I say confidently.

"Yeah, but I'm still ten miles faster!" he grins.

"RACE YOU TO YOUR DORM!" I yell, then race off, he swears at me then follows quickly, we run up the hall giggling and shoving each other madly. Until he pushes me into a wall and I nearly get another concussion, and I make him carry me back, where I jump out of his arms at the last minute and win the race, laughing at him insanely.

He scowls. "No fair! You cheat!"

I grin, and stroke my chin thoughtfully. "I prefer to call it 'Outwitting'." He swears at me and I skip inside, where a 'what ze hell?'-ish Kimimaro is waiting for me to bounce up to pat his head then bounce off to Naruto's room.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**HHELLOOO! What is up out there? The wide wild world not doing too much harm to you all I hope? Good. If not, I shall say what a person said to me once '**_**sit still and look until you see with laughter'**_** which you may interpret as you like. It may help. **

**Anyway, Animelover07821 has asked for tips on fanfiction-writing, I am VERY AMAZINGLY flattered. And I seriously don't know If I'm ze person to ask, buuuut I'll answer as much as my brain will make sense of. I guess ALL writing really requires a few ****fun****damentals: **

**. It has to come from ze heart, for me, writing an OC has to really come from **_**me **_**and portray a person as they really are: totally imperfect and annoying. **

**. you have to plan ahead, don't just write on spur-of-the-moment idea's, write down your plans and think about them, because the first idea's you have are usually the first idea's everybody else has, and the further you get along the track, the better the story will become, talking stuff over with an amazing friend always helps. **

**. Have fun. Don't make it a chore, because then it's boring and not fun, and usually readers can tell. I am an insane reader too, and I hate it when you can just feel the un-enthusiasm. (But don't give up when you hit a hard bit, just keep on going! If you totally hate it, sure, drop it, but otherwise just have a break and think it over). **

**.Write a good 3-4 chapters **_**BEFORE**_** you publish, then you are sure that you are along the right track, and off to a good start. I find it INSANLY depressing when you read a good first chappie, then the writer gives up. **

**Don't know if it will help, but yooh asked so maybe it's good, dunno. But I LUURRVVEEE you all SO MUCH! Seriously, my eternal devotion is all yours. It really is. Thanks heaappss! Thanks for the reviews and thanks for reading! **

**Xoxoxo to-love-is-(not to in this case)-lie. **


	12. Venting Injuries

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Chapter Twelve: **

_Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.__ - __Mae West_

…………………………………………………………………………………………

**Moooonday - 29/2/18 – DAMNITTT!!! Why can't we damn-well catch Sasuke!???**

Kimimaro said he was still in his Science, and he hadn't moved just on expecting us to move. How the hell did he damn well know our every move!? Naruto and I sat in the thinking-kitchen (being my kitchen) and Naruto opened and closed the fridge door obsessively.

"Why, why Sora!?" he complained.

"He can read your mind; you should put up a wall."

"How!?" He asked, glaring.

"Well, you start with a hat, then add bricks." I tell him matter-of-factly. He glowers and I grin at his sulky-ness.

"Fiine. Well, he has to take science, so you change back to your old one, and I'll move to your one. He'll move to my one, since he knows my every move, and then we corner him! BAM!" he smacks his fist on his open palm for emphasis, seeing opportunity, I grin excitedly.

"Wait, wait, wait!" I say, then run over to the fruit-bowl and pick a grape. "Now, do that again." I say, placing the grape on his open palm.

"I'm not squishing a grape everywhere!" he said, glaring.

"No," I say, sighing as if it were obvious. "It's Sasuke! That's the BAM! In our plan!" then I forget totally about the grape and start laughing. "Hahaha. Grapes put the 'Bam!' in your plan!"

Naruto rolls his eyes and flicks the grape, here he makes possibly the BEST shot in the history of good shots, it hits my forehead where it bounces off and lands in the bin, I gape. "Did you _see _that!?" he asks in disbelief.

"How the hell did you make that shot?" I say eyes wide.

He blinks. "I don't know, strange burst of co-ordination?" he says, grinning. I laugh.

"Something I'll never experience." I sigh over-dramatically. "Oh, life is cruel!"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Tues 1/3/18 – NEW MOONTH! This month is called MMAARRCHH. It stands for 'fiinding saasuuke.' It's true. It was named after Sasuke. Because we will find him. **

This month will be good. I can tell. Today will be awesome.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Fuckity fuck fuck fuck. **

I have a problem. A big one too, it may take explaining. Unless you find being locked in an English that smells of old peanuts a normal situation.

In English today we were asked to 'brainstorm'. Kimimaro has switched Englishes, strangely, and I was sitting next to him and staring at the paper.

"Hey, what _is_ brainstorming?"

"Thinking of ideas." He said, looking at me as if I was stupid.

"No, no, in the _literal _sense. Seriously, can one's brain actually _storm_!?" I ask, blinking at the paper.

He laughs. "I don't know."

I frown at the paper, before picking up my pencil and drawing somebody with a cloud for a head and lightning as eyes, I laugh, and the English Sensei picked up the paper from behind me. "Brainstorming." He read, then looked at me as if I was crazy.

Hasn't anyone here heard of originality? Gosh. Some people.

"Ms….?" He looks at me.

"Sorano," I fill in. "Takaski."

"Ah, well, Ms. Takaski, glad to see you are looking at words in both emotional and literal senses, but, I would save the illustrations for after school." He frowned at me and I grinned in response.

"A picture is worth 1000 words, I heard once." I reply. He glares, and pulls out a detention slip.

Dangit.

So now I find myself in the English room at lunch time and I'm supposed to be writing out an essay on talking back to Sensei's. He just said to leave it on his desk, and I'm already done but I can't leave because he has locked the freaking door.

And hasn't left a key. Which I find quite vexing, and since all the windows seemed to be quite locked, I am, as one would say, quite SCREWED!!!

And I am going to suffocate soon, this place smells of old lunches and peanuts. Like the sensei, I swear, that sensei is like, a cucumber that was left outside for too long and grew legs and a brain. Hahaha. That's why he smells like old lunches.

But it doesn't explain the peanut-smell. That is one of life's many mysteries. Why does a cucumber with legs and a brain (and possibly arms, with a stretch of the imagination) smell like peanuts? We shall never know.

I never really noticed peanuts had a smell anyway. Errgg. I'm going mad(der). I need fresh air, not mouldy cucumber air.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**You know, Air vents are quite handy for many situations. **

After thinking of fresh air, my eyes at gone towards the air-vent, and I had immediately put a chair on the desk, and crawled into the opening, but then half way through, I realized there was now a chair on a desk under a slightly-open air-vent in a locked room. Hmmm. What would one think when coming into that room? So, I thought, I know! I'll just turn around and lean down and fix it….

Of course, things aren't that simple. Turning around in a small, confined space is kinda hard. Especially when you are high above the ground where people are walking. It is quite disturbing, I imagine to hear mad clattering and cursing coming from an air vent above you.

So I ended up with my legs crossed over each other, my head bent down near my hips and my arms strapped to my sides. Stuck. "Fuck." I breathe, trying to move, but failing miserably.

Okay…. Okay….calm… calm…. Calm…. FREAKING CALM ALREADY!

Then I decided it was all or nothing, I didn't care if it hurt! So I just twisted, and ended up smack-bang on my stomach, the breath knocked out of my and now on it's way to Konoha. A massive pain bolted through my leg, the whole entire left side, and I lay on my stomach with my face scrunched up resisting the urge to cry. Okayy… okay…. Calm…

After I had composed myself, I army-crawled the way back, and found the air vent opening, and took off the lid, I eased my face down first, feeling the uncomfortableness of blood rushing to your head, then my torso and arms, and reached to grab the chair. I got hold of the two rails on the backboard of it, and slid it down to the teachers desk.

I looked around to admire my handy work. Well, my leg was half torn apart, but I am quite proud, if I do say so myself!

Of course, none of my plans ever go right and by this time my whole face was hot and bright red from being upside-down for so long, and it was about then that Sasuke stood up and walked foreword.

"You know, for a moment there you scared me. Then I realized it wasn't a random hanging from the roof, it was you, so it was acceptable."

My face, gets possibly redder and I scowl, we seem to have forgotten the whole punch thing for the moment, seeing as me hanging out of an air-vent is too entertaining. "Oh, so only finding _me_ hanging out of an air-vent is acceptable." I glare.

He grins. "But, that's you, Sora, nobody else would get themselves into this type of situation." He motions to the chair and the desk, then to me. I was, by this time, in excruciating pain due to leaning on the edge of the air-vent, which was cutting of my circulation and my leg was (actually, thankfully) quite numb, and my head was getting dizzy from the blood rushing to it.

"Sora, you look a bit red…" Sasuke said, raising his eyebrow.

"I guessed!" I gasp, and immediately scramble back into the air-vent

"So, why _are_ you in an air-vent?" he asks, calling upwards now as I gasp and touch my numb legs. Nope nothing. Can't feel a thing. Greeaatt.

"I thought it would be fun to try." I gasp. "Maybe I'd find you in here while I'm at it."

"Oh, haha." He said sarcastically. "Why _are_ you in there?"

"The door was locked. It was the only way out, this place smells of old peanuts and I was about to commit suicide, then remembered Naruto would kill me if I did."

Sasuke is quiet, and I decide to leave knowing I couldn't do much without Naruto. "See ya around, Sasuke. And I'm glad that bruise healed up nicely!" I call back as I crawl through the vent back to my room.

Of course, this is the hard bit. You see, I know my way _to_ Naruto's room, and my room, but not _from_ the English room.

So I wandered about for a while in the venting system lost as a goose in a snowstorm. Yes. A goose. That was how lost I was.

Eventually I decided I was going to die in here and somebody would find my body rotting away in the vent pipes one day, but then my savoir arrived! NARUTOO!! He was walking down the hall, and I moved to the nearest open vent.

"Naruto!" I hiss.

He stops, and shakes himself, before he keeps walking, I curse, and move up to the next window to the hallway. "NARUTO!" I hiss louder, in that kinda whisper-yell you do when you don't want anyone else to hear, but they hear anyway.

Naruto, and several other people stopped this time, all shook themselves and kept walking, Naruto paused, and hit his ear incase he was hearing things, I took this opportunity to get his attention the only way I could. I spat on him.

Of course, at this, he looked up, and saw a very angry face. And naturally, when one sees a very angry face looking at them from a vent unexpectedly, they scream.

Which is what Naruto did. I hissed at him to be quiet, and explained my situation, saying I'd tell him the whole story later, he nodded, and let me follow him to his dorm, where I practically fell out onto Kimimaro's bed, and gasped as my leg hit the mattress.

"SHIT!" I let out, grabbing it and wincing.

"What happened?" Naruto asked, running over. I was still breathing heavily.

"I've just spent over 3 hours in a vent, ten I spent hanging upside-down talking to our favourite emo, 2 hours was spent wandering uselessly, and a whole twenty was wasted on being a contortionist while trying to turn around." I snap.

"What's up with your leg though?"

"I'm not a trained contortionist, what'd you_ think_ happened?" I glare.

"Oh…" he said, frowning. "Maybe you should see the nurse."

"No!!!" I say, shaking my head. "What would I tell her? I was crawling around lost in the school's venting system?"

"Okay, true…" Naruto said, drifting off into thought.

Eventually I make him carry me back to the couch because it would be bad to be caught on Kimimaro's bed. Then he stops and faces me. "…. Did you spit on me back there?"

I grin. "Erm… well, how else would I get your attention?"

He goes pale. "YUCK!" and rushes off madly to the shower yelling "EW EW EW EW!"

I laugh, and sit up to inspect my leg. I touched a spot where the bruise was forming, and go pale. "AHH!" the whole left side of my left leg has practically committed suicide when I had touched ONE PLACE! You know how WEIRD it was to touch somewhere and then feel it somewhere else? VERY!

In the middle of my screaming, Kimimaro had walking in; he saw me with ice on my leg and sighed. "What happened?"

I grin. "Well… I tripped. And now my leg is insane. I touch _here_-" I touch the place, and swear madly again. "- and then I feel it here!" I motion to the place this time, knowing better.

"You know what? Kabuto knew he'd see you again." Kimimaro sighed. "Come on."

I smile brightly. "Good-oh! Kabuto seemed nice."

Kimimaro rolled his eyes. "_Seemed_."

So we made our way ALL the way down the hall, and I could feel it all over my whole leg when I stepped down. It's HORRIBLE! I limped down and Kimimaro knocked on Kabuto's door. I wait impatiently.

Kabuto opens the door, a look of astonishment appears, but it quickly replaced with a smirk. "How did I know I'd see you again?"

"Because I'd given myself a self-inflicted concussion for no particular reason?" I suggest, scowling.

He laughed. "Maybe."

I limped over and made myself at home on the couch (much like Naruto's, since nobody is original with the room layouts here) and scowled at the wall moodily.

Kabuto brought down a medical kit. "So what happened?" he asked, I launch into a take about how I tripped and landed on a pointy stick. He sighs, and shakes his head (_hopefully_ at my 'clumsiness' not my lie.)

"…And so, if I touch it here-" I point this time, not touch. "I can feel it here!" I finished, looking distraught. "WILL I EVER WALK AGAIN!?"

He laughs and Kimimaro sighs. "I told you."

What he told him, I will never know, because I just faced him with crazy eyes. "Is it that bad, doctor? Come on! I can take it!"

He shakes his head, and for a moment I was scared I _wouldn't_ walk again, and then I realized he was smiling, and only a sick, sick, SICK, person would smile at somebody who was condemned to a wheelchair. "Yeah, you've just bruised a nerve, that's why you can feel it over your leg." He said. "I'll bandage it, but it'll still take a few weeks to heal, you'll feel it for a while." He said, getting out a bandage.

He wraps it up and I complain the whole time about my 'aching bones' and how I'm getting old so I deserve respect, Kabuto just shakes his head and pushes up his glasses. I sigh. "Done yet?"

"No."  
"Yet?"

"No."

"…Ye-"

"No!" he snapped, glaring, I grin.

"Done?" I ask when he stepped back and glared.

"Yes." I pat him on the head, and attempt to skip off, but just hurt myself and grip my leg insanely.

"OOWW!" I groan, regretting the 'skipping' decision.

Kimimaro thanked Kabuto and shoved my arm around his shoulder. "You should really hurt yourself less." He muttered.

"I try."

"Not hard enough." He said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey! I can look after myself!"

"Sure. And look, you are the one in bandages."

"Shoosh." I say, sniffing, and ignoring him.

He escourts me back to my dorm, and I tell him to tell Naruto I'm sorry for spitting on him, and my leg is cared for. He grins, and goes off, Tayuya immediately attacks me with questions.

"What are you doing with Kimimaro?"

"Where did you two go?"

"Why is your leg bandaged?"

"Did the fangirls attack you?"

"Are you two going out?"

"What happened!?"

I sigh, and start from the beginning of her list. "Kimimaro was helping me back because I was hurt, We went to Kabuto so he could fix my leg, I fell over, no, they didn't, we're not going and I fell over!" I say, and then take a deep breath as I'd said that all in one sentence.

She looks disappointed, and yet relieved. "Oh." She said, scowling again. "Okay then."

I glared and limped to my room, where I am now. This has been a horrible day. When too many things happen it's always horrible. And A LOT happened today.

And my leg hurts.

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**HEELLOO!!! Thanks HEAPS for reading reviewing the last chappie! I LUURRVE YOU SO MUUCHH!!!! Hope you are all gooood. How has your daysss been? Awesome I hope! **

**Lots o lurrrve, to-love-is-to-lie. **


	13. Polly

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**Chapter Thirteen: **

_Sometimes the Questions are complicated and the Answers are simple – Dr. Seuss_

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**2/3/18 – New leaaddd.**

Kimimaro spotted Sasuke. Me and Naruto are switching. We decided it in the R.I.P (Room of Inspirational Plans) so it has to happen now.

The idea is, I go into Kimimaro's science and chase Sasuke out, while Naruto stays where he is (unlike the other days, when we have travelled in a pattern) and BAM! Sasuke is caught like a mongoose in a mongoose trap.

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**Thursday - 3/3/18 (twoo thhrreee's!!!!) – hahahahaha. **

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Possibly THE most hilarious thing OF THE SEASON! HAHAHAHAHA! It's too funny! I can't take it! I can't say it! it's just too much! HAHAHAHAHA!

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**Hahahaha.**

Okay, I can… Tayuya…. Thinks….. SHE IS GOING ON A DATE WITH SASUKE! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! How funny CAN YOU GET!? Not much more, and even if she is, like, it's probably because she like pays him in something.

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**½ later**

I wanna see this, I made out I was madly jealous and sat on the couch waiting for the door to open, mainly coz I wanted to laugh at him. Tayuya seemed glad I was 'madly jealous.' And went around thinking 'aloud' about what she would wear. I just laughed, luckily my laugh is horrible so she may have mistaken it for crying.

Anyway, I'm now waiting. Un-patiently.

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**Dangit.**

I meant Impatiently. I am too exited to think about spelling.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

…

Un-patiently isn't even a WORD is it?

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**HAHAHAHA! **

The door rang, and she said 'can you get it?' to rub it in my face, which I was very glad off because this was the opportunity I had been waiting for. I opened the door, my face smug with pent-up laughter.

He was wearing black pants and a white button-up top, I am just starting to get used to his perfect-ness again now. I swear, I should REALLY tell him what he does to girls mental states. I would hate to have him in front of me in a test or something. I would fail.

He looked surprised, and was half way between saying 'Sorano' but then Tayuya came out so he quickly changed it to 'someone.' And I had to cover my mouth from laughter. He glared. Fortunately, Tayuya didn't notice our exchange and took my red face (from pent-up laughter at him having to go on a date with TAYUYA!) as mad jealousy. Sasuke put up his finger at me on the way out, and I just grinned and waved like an exited mother.

Now I'm here and very borreedd.

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**8:56**

Wonder what Tayuya had to pay to get a date with Sasuke.

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**8:59**

Can't be money. Sasuke has inherited a whole half of the Uchiha wealth.

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**9:02**

Bet she paid him in conversation hearts.

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**9:03 **

HAHAHAHA! No even better, she fed him CRACKERS! Polly FINALLY got his cracker. Hahahaha.

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9:14

Hahaha. Sasuke is now Polly.

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**9:20 **

I do wonder what Tayuya had to of done to get Polly to go out with her. Even HE wouldn't go that far just to piss Naruto and me off. She must have like, done his homework.

…. Nah. He is too genius-y. Maybe she has been paying him in, erm, cleaning his room? Giving him a wardrobe make-over? Haircuts? Secrets? Manicures?

Wait-wait-wait. Secrets. Hahaha. She is paying him in secrets. Nah, what secrets can he get from her that he can't get from me?

Well, Naruto's for one…

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**9:23**

Shit. 

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:45 **

I had walked to Naruto, and had got caught by the man with 7 chins (he had gone on a Prefect camp, no wonder I hadn't seen him! He was 'chosen' or something, that's why I didn't get three days of Tayuya-free-ness, since she is a prefect too.

Anyway, I had gotten to the door, but the man with 7 chins was like, authority-plus now, and was all 'IT'S THREE MINUTES PAST CURFEW! GET BACK IN YOUR DORM! RAH RAH RAH! BLAH BLAH BLAH!' and so Naruto came out at all the yelling to find me scowling. I winked at him, trying to convey my 'open the vent' mind-messages, and storming out, the man with 7 (it's verging on 8 now) chins looks proud.

Here is where I usually say 'and then I tripped over the pot-plant' but on the place where the pat-plant was, was a piece of paper with Kimimaro's neat cursive writing on it saying 'Watch out for the door.'

I grin, and wave thanks to him, he grinned back and I walked to my dorm.

And now I'm just waiting until I find it safe to crawl through the vent. I now know how Sasuke always know what we're gonna do. Tayuya was perfect. And the fact we used the kitchen for our R.I.P (Room of Inspirational Plans) made it all the easier. We were SO stupid. Erg. _I need_ to speak to him… That's it, it's like 11 so I should make it okay.

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**HELLOO!!! Hmm. How am I? Well, I am good! I have some tests n stuff coming up so I'll be a touch busy. Buutt otherwise I am larry-happy! Hope your all well, and happy as ever (or happy as never, if you are never happy, if so, BE HAPPY!) **

**Lurrvvee, to-love-is-to-lie. **

**p.s. tell me what you think of the quotes, somebody did it on another story (kudos to them!) and I lurvved the idea so I stole it. hehe. ;) **

**p.p.s. plus these quotes are awesome. I lurrve them. **

**p.p.p.s. and just for the legal reasons, I don't own them or have anything to do with them besides reading, ect, ect. Hehe :D **


	14. Showdown

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**Chapter Fourteen: **

_Fall Not In Love; it will stick to Your Face – National Lampoon_

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**2am **

Well, I found him, and made it through the vent successfully, which KILLED since my leg is still painfully painful when I lean on it. Like a bruise on my whole leg. AND had to sneak past a sleeping Kimimaro too. Which was nerve-racking since I am crappy at being subtle and sneaky, Naruto wasn't expecting me; it seems he missed my 'wink-wink'ness.

I had burst in and had to smack him awake (he is a DEEP sleeper, and he snores.) he nearly screamed but I shoved a pillow in his mouth in time. Hehe. He wasn't too pleased.

I had sat down, and waited until he was awake, when I was sure he was listening I explained my logic. "It was Tayuya, Naruto. It was all her. She's been telling Sasuke all our plans. _That_'s how he's always one step ahead!" I say quickly. His eyes widen.

"…Shit." He muttered.

"My reaction _exactly_." I say, sighing. "Okay, tomorrow you switch to the other science and I'll go to Kimimaro's. He doesn't know, we do it as soon as the office opens. I'll sneak out before Tayuya does." I say.

"Deal," he agrees, rubbing his temples. "God, Sora, we were so stupid."

"I know." I said, grimacing. "And to think I was thinking Tayuya paid Sasuke in conversation hearts."

"Paid Sasuke?" he frowned, and I saw my mistake. Shitshitshit.

"Oh, don't worry." I say dismissively. "Nothing."

"Sora," He said warningly. "Tell me."

My voice raises an octave. "I told you, nothing."

He fixes his blue eyes on me and I swallow. "Sora…"

I crack. "FINE! Sasuke took Tayuya on a date! But don't freak out! Please! He was just using her, nothing else!" I say, trying to cover the mistake of telling Naruto that.

Naruto was pale. "He took her… and a _date_?" he whispered. "You sure he doesn't actually like her!?" he said, worry creasing his brow.

"No! He doesn't! He was using her!"

"Are you sure!?" his voice rises, and I shove a pillow over his face again, he gets the point. "Stop smothering me! Now tell me EVERY-" I shove the pillow over his face again.

"SHH!" I whisper angrily. "Keep it down! And yes, I'm sure. Tayuya is a red-haired whore. Seriously, even Sasuke can do better!" I laugh at my idiot-ness. _Even Sasuke_. Pah, Sasuke could get any girl he liked when he wanted. The only people on earth I think that wouldn't be swayed by his amazing-ness are me and sakura. And even I have my moment of 'shit….I forgot how perfect he is.'

Naruto looked depressed again, and flopped back down on the bed, covering his face with his hands. "Errgg. Sorano, how the hell do I compete with these people?" he said, staring blankly at the roof.

I sigh. Knowing he needed a pep-speech. "You don't, you don't need to."

"Yes, I do. Sasuke is so… so perfect! In every way!" he said, exasperated.

I incline my head. "Yes, he is… it's true, but it doesn't matter because you are to him too."

"What?" Naruto was obviously confused.

I sigh. "In his eyes, your too perfect to be true too." I explain. "It's all point of view."

"But unfortunately a hell of a alotta people share my view?"

I grin. "I doubt that."

He glares. "Not funny."

I sigh, and lie down next to him, and join him in staring at the ceiling. "You know, I've always wondered something…" I start.

"Hm?" Naruto asked.

"Well, you hated each other so much at first, how… how did it happen?" I ask, curious.

A half-smile appeared on Naruto's face. "Heh… well, you see…" he stopped, and laughed again. "We were… 14 I think. Remember how Sasuke used to have all that long hair?"

"Yeah…" I grin too. "And you had such a round race. And you were short too!" I glare, as his feet we all the way to the end of the bed where mine reached his ankles.

He grins down at me. "Anyway, it was after soccer practise, it had been an extra-hate-filled one too, and me and Sasuke had been pushing each other and shoving and swearing all day, then Tsnuade caught us and said we had to mop the tiles until we worked out our differences…"

At this I laugh. "'Worked out your differences'?" I ask.

"Yeah… Anyway, he teased me telling me to stop 'undressing Neji with my eyes'" Naruto glared at the ceiling. I laughed. "And then I don't know, we were too close, and we couldn't help it."

"But wasn't there that time you two accidentally…."

Naruto waved a hand. "But that was different."

I laugh again. "And hilarious!"  
he hits my stomach and I laugh louder. He glares. "Shut it!"

After a while, I VENTtured (hahaha. Hilarity) back to my dorm, and now I'm here, thinking. I know we'll see Sasuke soon. He can't hide forever since now we know we have to switch rooms away from Tayuya and her crazy spying techniques.

I can't help feeling nervous. What if everything goes wrong? And how are we actually going to get him home? Just throw him in a sack and cart him back? Hmmm. Might work, buuut his new man-muscles may pose a threat seeing as I am puny and short.

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**Sattersss 5/3/18 – switched classes.**

T'is done. Come moooonday we shall catch Sasuke. Naruto is throwing a fit. He is as nervous as a pigeon in a …erm… blender. My leg hurts. Nothing new really.

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**Wednesday 9/3/18 – Polly Ze Parrot (aka, Sasuke) has been DESTROYED! **

Not really. But Naruto is now in severe depression. And I am going to kick Sasuke's stupid little ass. Seriously, I promised him some time back that he can do what he wants, but if he harms one little emotional hair on Naruto's balding pigeon head he would wish he never lived. And trust me, it WILL happen.

Well, we had caught him on Monday. And I was too angry too write for two whole days because I tried and the pen went through four pages. Now I am with Naruto, and still pissed off as anything, but calm enough to write. I have to keep reminding Naruto to breathe. I seriously do HATE Sasuke. He has broken Naruto's heart for the last fucking time.

Anyhoo, we had science last period and he had been there, Naruto had seen him for the first time and I remember he just gripped my hand hard. Sasuke didn't notice, he had no worries, he just expected us to be in Kimimaro's class, still wondering why the hell he was 'psychic'. Then at the end of class we cornered him, and he knew his mistake.   
I just remember the first time they saw each other, before the fury in Sasuke's eyes and the betrayal in Naruto's, there was a flash of longing, Sasuke's features just screamed 'I'm so sorry' for a split second. It tore me apart, because I knew then Sasuke wouldn't go down without a fight. I sigh, knowing this was a horrible idea. I shouldn't have approached it this way. Sasuke hates surprises.

I saw the traces of his black eye still there and clenched my fist, not in a threatening way, just in a 'control yourself, sora' way. No-one spoke. Sasuke then calmed his features and tried to walk past, for a moment, we almost let him, then we came to our senses.

"Sasuke." I acknowledged.

"Sorano." He replied, a faint smirk on his face.

"I trust you've been good?" I smirk back.

"I've been worse." His eyes flicked to the silent Naruto for a second. Who stood, stony-faced, hands in his pockets.

"Nice bruise you've got there, what happened?"

"I ran into a wild-cat." He replied, grinning. I resisted a laugh.

"Seems it was an angry one." My voice turned cold there, and our 'friendly' talk ended.

He inclined his head. "It was."

"It's been more then two years. Time to come home." I said fixing his gaze with mine. Naruto still didn't speak.

"I never agreed to come home. Just that I'd see you in two years."

"Doesn't matter. Time to come home." I say again.

"Well, we have to agree to disagree on that one." He said. My frown deepened and turned into a glare.

"I doubt that." I muttered.

"And you will continue to do so." Sasuke said, inclined his head to both Naruto and I and started to walk off. This time I snapped. I'd had enough of games. And I could tell Sasuke knew he was getting away too easy. After this, we wouldn't catch him again.

"Sasuke you ASSHOLE! GET BACK HERE NOW!" I yell at the top of my lungs, and I saw Naruto cover a laugh, and Sasuke turned and glared. We all suddenly felt like we were at home, like nothing had ever happened, and I can tell it was that feeling, and that feeling only that made Sasuke walk back.

I stepped up and looked up to face him, he smirked at my short-ness, I stepped on his toe. "Sasuke, you listen now and listen bloody well good, we have worked our asses off to get your girly legs back home! So damn well sort out your differences now or you BOTH-" For the first time, Sasuke and Naruto fully acknowledged each other. And I was glad, step one done. "-Will regret ever bringing me into THIS." I motion to them both.

"More then I already do?" Sasuke said, eyes not leaving Naruto.

"Yes." I said, glaring at him.

"Well," Naruto started, stepping foreword

Sasuke's face contorted again, at the sound of his voice, agony reading plain, he wanted to go to Naruto, he wanted to hold him again. It was good that was still there, it was our only hope. Sasuke had seen him. How he wasn't like a little kid anymore, he was tall now, taller then Sasuke and mature.

"Hi, I'm Naruto." He introduced, I resisted a grin. Sasuke looked pissed off. "Who are you?" he finished.

"He _was _Uchiha Sasuke." I said sourly. "Don't know who he is now."

Naruto raised his eyebrows "Oh, I've heard of him."

"I knew him once, you know."

"Musta been a long time ago. I heard not many people see him around these days."

"Yeah, it was-"

Sasuke had glared this whole time. And eventually he snapped. "You shouldn't have come, I don't need you here!"

"Obviously you do, if that's your answer." I snapped back. "Come on Naruto, let's go before he gets beaten up by a short, weak girl again."

Naruto looked pale still, and nodded, before walking back to his dorm, I stopped, and caught Sasuke by the shoulder. "Don't you dare pull a stunt like that next time we meet, Sasuke. Okay? Once Naruto said to me 'Sasuke needs us, you know him, he'll sit on the shore and deny the fact the tide is rising, it's up to you and me to carry him out before he drowns.' And trust me, buddy, your drowning." I glare one last time, before walking to catch up with Naruto.

I lace my fingers with his. "Calm, your shaking." I say gently. He was still pale. And I sigh before pulling him back when he took the wrong turn to his dorm.

Now we are here. Both kinda shaken, both worried and most of all, both scared. Was it true? Did we really know Sasuke at all anymore?

I need coffee. But first I need to cheer Naruto up some more.

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**Helloo!! Thanks for waiting soo loonnggg. I LUURVVEE these questions!!! Seriously, I will be even MORE forever in your debt if you humour me by asking questions. So if your just bored, or you actually wanna know something, ASK AWAY MY FRIENDS!! **

**Hmm… Where did I get inspiration for Sora? Welll. I would have to say from my friends (who are awesome) and from the story-line, sometimes you need to look at the storyline before you look at the character. And Sora just came gift-wrapped with this one. Though it took ages to find a name, but it means 'Of the sky' so I thought 'it's the closest I'll find, I'LL TAKE IT!' hehe. **

**Anyhoo, LUURVVEE YOUUU (yes, YOU) SO MUCH!!! Thanks HEAPS, luurve to-love-(ISNT!)-to-lie. **


	15. Mailll

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**Chapter Fifteen: **

_Don't knock the Weather. If it didn't change once in a while, 9 out of 10 people couldn't start a conversation. – Kin Hubbard _

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**½ hour later. **

"…Naruto, here's my logic, if Sasuke was worried that we COULD convince him to go home, he wouldn't be scared, and would probably be here right now with us. But he IS so, a) we can get him home somehow and b) he doesn't FREAKING HATE US! STOP MOPING!" I yell insanely for the 609th time.

He says something inaudible from under the pillow he was holding to his face I glare at him and drag the pillow away again so he could breathe. "Stop it! Seriously, I'll smother you personally in a minute! Your crazy depressions are driving me INSANE! ERRGG!! INFACT IT DRIVES ME SO INSANE I NEED COFFEE!" I yell and then stomp outside, and shove a scared Kimimaro out from the coffee-cupboard, finding no coffee there, and turn on him and yell "WHERE'S ZE FREAKING COFFEE!?"

He looks scared and points to the table-top. "Er, there."

I blink. "Oh." And smile brightly. "Thank you!"

And so I wandered back to Naruto's room, force-fed him coffee, then picked up ze pen diary again.

Now I'm bored. Naruto is sad. And Kimimaro is confused.

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**Some time laters.**

Happy days.

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**10/3/18**

Great. Naruto is all 'there's no point, let's just go home, rahrahrah, blahblahblah.' And I'm now the one who has to refuse to leave. Errggg.

Naruto says again how he'd never do anything without me and I can't ever leave… erg. I wish he'd stop that. It makes me so guilty-feeling. Once he has Sasuke it'll be fine. Just you wait.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

** Fridders 11/3/18 (Hahahaha. Fridders.) **

Boredboredboredbored. Human Mind made me depressed again, we sat and argued wether god was real again, and I just had time to think.

What happens when I go? Will Naruto really just let me leave? He'll understand, it's what I NEED to do. It's not like Sasuke leaving or anything. I'll visit, I just need to find Gaara first. It's not that bad.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**2 mins laters.**

Is it?

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Saturday 12/3/18 – MMAAIIILLL! **

Yess! Mailll!! Shika Sakura sent replies!! Naruto got his sperate too, and I opened my letter from Shika.

_You punched Sasuke__? Well. Times _have_ changed, haven't they? Anything else new? I expect there to be, knowing you. Everyone is good here, Kakashi and Iruka say hi, and that Iruka is slowly decreasing Kakashi's dirty book collection, I thought you'd be proud. _

_Don't hurt yourself too much. Naruto can't really stand to look after you as well. Once again, ignore 90 of what Sakura will write, tried to stop her, but couldn't. _

_Love, _

_Shika _

I grin at his letter, they argue a lot, but really I know they couldn't surivive without one-another. How strange, I wonder if they will stay together forever, but their both so young. T'is impossible, at 18 (19 in Sakura's case) I don't think anyone can stay together forever. Can they? Well, I really do hope they prove me wrong.

Smiling, I fold up the paper, put it back in it's envelope and reach for the scented pink paper that I know sakura would have written on.

_Hey hon, what's happening? Don't give yourself too many concussions, Naruto is throwing a fit over your casulties_. _Venting system's are fun? Hmm. Strange thing to say. Shika looked worried, but I just reckon your being random like you always are. Hehe. Venting systems. BTW, Shika laughed for about 4 hours straight when he heard you beat up Sasuke_

_ Kakashi Iruka say hi, god, Iruka isn't helping his dirty book addiction AT ALL. Seriously. Shika keeps telling me he is, we just don't notice, but as if! Seriously, he can't even go out to dinner with us without bringing one! _

_…Shika says he just did that to tick me off. Pah, as if. _

_Anyway, hope your good. Sorry my letter is puny and small but nothing much has happened, I got good marks on my test though, and Shika is taking a philosophy course. Once again, love you! _

_Loooove,_

_Sakura. _

_P.s. Shika's letter seems all sophisticated but really he spent 2 hours straight laughing over you punching Sasuke. His first attempt at a reply was just random scribble that when you turned it to the side tilted your head looked like Kakashi's hair. _

Grinning, I look to Naruto, who is also smiling, I shove the letter back in the envelope and grab a pen and start to write a reply.

_Hello all, _

_Glad to see your both well and interesting as usual, and I do TRY to keep myself out of trouble, I do, really. In the last few weeks (because you guys SUCK at writing fast!) I have only got… hmmm… on bruised nerve and gotten stuck out in a vent. I do believe that is pretty good for me. And the bruised nerve is healing nicely, though when I touch this spot on my leg (you can't see, but I'm pointing) I can feel it HERE! (once again, I am pointing). _

_Naruto is holding up nicely. I think. Though he keeps telling me not to leave, and I'm not really going anywhere until Sasuke is insane again. Hmmm. Kimimaro is super, though we haven't really talked much lately, though he did move that evil pot-plant that kept trying to assassinate me. We are English buddies, and spend most of ze period laughing. _

_Question: Can one's brain actually storm? _

_Hehe. NOOOO! SHIKA DON'T DO IT! Philosophy makes you emo. Sakura, keep the anti-depressants handy, he may come back amazingly sad. We have Human Mind here, which is like the same thing and it's quite boring, but when it DOES hit an interesting subject it makes you unbelievably cynical and you go around doubting everything for the next few days. _

_And you guys SUCK at letter-writing. Seriously. And Sakura, you spelt 'Casualties' wrong. It has an A in there. Next time just say 'stop being an accident magnet.' _

_Tell Iruka he has my support and he shouldn't be so subtle and just get the books and freaking BURN them. _

_Things are as good as things can get in this hell-hole, wish me and Naruto luck, and I hope you two are happy as Larry (when Larry is happy, that is, because I assume he might be sad at times.) _

_Lurrrve, _

_Sora_

I shove the letter in an empty envelope and wait for Naruto to finish his reply, eying his letter I scowl. "No fair, you got a longer letter!" I complain, reaching for it.

He leaps on his letter. "NOO!" He glares at me. "No reading!"

I pout. "Fine."

He finishes his letter and I go and post it, he looks shiftily at our locker as I open it, I give him a weird look. "Your always so nervous around the letter box." I laugh.

He glares. "I am not!"

I pull his cheek. "Nawww, you're so angry today! Somebody needs a nap!" I grin, and skip off to my dorm, but only make it half way around before my left starts to hurt.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**5:02 **

He is so strange…

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**6:00 **

Boredboredbored. I think I have Math work I was supposed to have completed, you see, in most of these stupid after-school-school's we are 'in control of our own learning' but because this is so excusive they expect a certain level of work every lesson, and if it's not done by next lesson we are s-c-r-e-w-e-d.

Damnit. I hate math.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**6:08**

It's actually quite hot today. And flies are EVERYWHERE! Errrg. I hate flies.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:22**

I have officially names the twelfth of the third 'national fly day'. Infact, I'm going to put it on my calender….

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:25 **

Hey! It's Easter in a month. Mmm. Easter. Yumyum.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:31 **

I HATE FLIES!

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Hellooo!!! THANKS SO MUCH FOR YOUR REVEIWS! **

**Ermm.. Could Sora ever chip her tooth on ice-cream? (Hahahaha. That made me laugh, truly, it did, you must be awesome to have managed that) Hmm. I reckon she could, she can get herself stuck in a vent and give herself concussions for no reason. Maybe there was an extra crunchy choc-chip. Hehe. **

'**When I said 'closest name I could get, what was I looking for?' Well, what name was I looking for… well, I was looking for something really Quiet, really. And then 'Of the sky' really just stood out for me. **

**THANKS SO MUUCHHH!!! THANKS HEAPS! Any Q's. I shall answer without a second through! (without even a first, really) hehe. Luurve you. **


	16. Caught Out

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Chapter Sixteen:

_Love isn't a decision. It's a feeling. If we could decide who we loved, it would be much simpler, but much less magical.__ - __Trey Parker and Matt Stone_

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

**13/3/18 – Sundders. Very bored. **

Wondered over to Kimimaro/Naruto's dorm since I was bored, Naruto was in the shower so I sighed and told Kimimaro to shove over.

"Hey Kim." I said.

"Kimimaro." He corrected.

"Yeah, but that is like a whole…" I stop to count on my fingers. "Three syllables more then 'Kim.' And am I really that energetic?" I face him with raised eyebrows, he grins.

"Not really."

We sit and talk for a while more, just about random things like school and the such, what English we have to do, what English we don't, English class in general, English teachers, things to do with English, and possibly a touch of English seeing as it's the only subject we have together.

"Did you find Uchiha Sasuke?" he asked.

"Yep." I say without thinking. Then freeze. "Shit. I mean… no! We weren't looking for Sasuke."

He laughed and I scowled. "Shh. Don't tell Naruto I said anything, but yarr, we did."

"And?"

I tap my nose. "Classified Information."

"Don't tell me you're another fangirl, he has enough of them, especially with Tayuya and all."

"Hm?" I sit up, seeing opportunity for information.

"They went on a date. And it was a mistake because she stalked him extra for a whole week and bragged to all the other girls until he publicly dumped her yesterday." He shook his head. "At the Prefect meeting she was crushed. Wouldn't even address the problem of appropriate tampon disposal units." He grins. "She's been nagging about that topic all year."

I laugh. "I didn't know he dumped her…"

"He said 'something came up.'" Kimimaro told me.

I think. Maybe there was hope left… "Really now, did he?" I said, grinning, then stopping and looking surprised again.

"You know something I don't…" He said accusingly, looking at me as if I was mad.

"Course not, you are too smart." I grin, tap his nose and skip off, once again regretting it and holding my sore leg.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**12:23pm**

HAHHAHAHAHA. Something 'came up'. Hmmm. Wonder what? Hmmmm. Hmmm. Thinking… oh! SUCH A HARD QUESTION!!! What to do… what to do…. Oh! I know, maybe HE SAW HIS GAY-LOVER!

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**1:53pm**

Naruto is here; he heard the news and got annoyed at me for calling him gay. I just stared at him until he was all "What!?"

"Naruto, you _are_ gay."

"I AM NOT!"

"Must I explain to you the difference between girls and boys, because it seems you are quite mistaken with Sasuke…"

He glared. "But I'm not gay!"

Then I took the opportunity to kindly point out that against popular belief, Sasuke was a man and that seeing as he was 'supposedly' a man too, it would kinda mean they were homosexual. And 'gay' meaning happy, but also being slang for 'homosexual' would mean he is.

Then he glared, and I laughed and said "Oh, slap me with your handbag!"

And then he complied and used a pillow instead.

………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:21**

I AM SO BOORREED!! This week is proving to be very boring, DO SOMETHING YOU STUPID WEEK! Be interesting! Individual! Amazing! ANYTHING BUT BORING!

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**7:00 **

Nup. Still boring.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**7:18**

Damn you, you stupid boring week!

…………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Tuesday – 15/3/18 – Still bored. It's like 11:00, and I have bloody 'after-class completion assignments.' **

Errgg. Hey, reckon Naruto'd mind if I dropped by and made him do my Math work?

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**16/3/18 - 2:00am. Dangit. **

I knew it would happen sometime. I really did. Somewhere inside, I knew it'd happen. I guess I had it coming. With crawling through Kimimaro's room and all that…

Well, I had crawled along the vent, ignoring my painful leg which still disagreed with crawling through confined spaces, and finally reached Naruto's dorm, and done the usual 'listen for Kimimaro being awake' check, then not really bothered to check further and lifted up the vent-cover, and swung down onto the bed-side table.

I had grumbled and dusted myself, off, but never really noticed the fact that Kimimaro's bed was quite empty. Noooo. That didn't matter, I didn't think to go back, instead I just kept on a walking. Stupid points for Sora!

I walked to the door and twisted the door handle, when it seemed to twist back the other way, I frowned at it, and twisted again. It twisted back again. This time I glared, rolled up my sleeves and twisted REALLLY hard, it did the same, eventually I went into super-angry-my-leg-hurts-so-don't-mess-with-me-mode and just ran at the door madly and this time it opened. Of course. THAT time it opened. I ran straight into something I was quite positive should have been a door, I look up and smile guiltily into Kimimaro's eyes.

"Well, hello there… you know, I always assumed this, but never really believed it…" He started.

"Gosh! What are you doing up so late!?" I demand. "Tsk, tsk. Some people, truants." I stick my nose in the air and go to storm past him, he catches my shoulders and swings me back around to face him again.

"Can I at least know _why _you're in my room?"

"Excuses, excuses, you should be in bed young man!" I shake my head sadly. "The youth these days has no respect for the elderly."

"Okay, granny, tell me how you got into my room." he glares, I grin.

"Well, back _in my_ _day_…" I start, then hear a random grunting sound from the other room, and heavy stomping. I narrow my eyes then go pale. "Minor earthquakes… could only mean one thing!"

I was shoved madly into his room and he closed the door, I mouth angrily, then see his point and flatten myself against the wall behind the door and listen. "What was that noise?" The man with 7 (going on 8) chins asked.

"Nothing, I was just annoyed because my door was stuck." The usual tone of humour in Kimimaro's voice was gone, or maybe when he was around me the usual cold in his voice was gone… hmm.

"I could swear I heard a voice…." He asked suspiciously.

"And I think your fat covered your ears, where would a person come in?" He asked sarcastically. "It was just the door."

"Want me to give it a hand?" The fat one offered. I giggle, inside my head I was saying 'I think you meant "give it a CHIN!"' and Kimimaro had to yawn extra-loud to cover my laugh.

"No, no. it's okay now."

"You sure? Maybe you need somebody a bit stronger…" The fat one asked, and I could hear the earth-tremors coming as he stomped towards the door and twisted the handle. "Seems fine…" he opened it, and I saw it swing towards me and sucked all my breath in to make my stomach flatter as the door handle on the other side swung into me.

I look at Kimimaro frantically through the crack near the door hinges, he sees my plea for help and quickly pulls the fat one back. "It's okay! Now let me sleep!"

The man with 7 chins grunts. "Okay, you're a girl, I bet the door wasn't even stuck." He glowers. "Woke me up for no reason…." Grumbles, and earthquakes off. Damnit, who knows what hungry kids in like Land-of-waves are being hit by a tsunami now thanks to his walking?

I let out my breath as he walks away, and Kimimaro walks in and shuts the door behind him I sigh and grin. "Well, you might be a good actor after all."

I walk over and sit on his bed, leaning on the other bed-side table. He glares. "You owe me."

"Owe you what?"

"Explain how the hell you got in here, and I'll call it even."

I grin. "Gosh, you let me off to easy, I was expecting to have to clean the man-with-7-going-on-8-chins room or something drastic like that."

He rolls his eyes. "Now, explain."

I sigh. "Well, in the last few weeks I have found vents are actually very handy things…" I start. He goes pale.

"…._Vents_…" he starts. "Do you know how _dangerous_ that is!? No wonder you get hurt 24/7!"

"Well, it is a handy way of after-curfew travel…" I explain.

He sighs. "Okay, go on."

"Well, that's about it, Naruto's room's vent-opening is wayyyy too small, so I have been coming in through your room…"

"So that is how you kept getting in!"

"Yeppp. I am _quite _the sneaky genius." I say proudly.

"So that's why you turn up at midnight and turn the door handle when I turn the door-handle?"

"Yes!" I say, grinning.

He rolls his eyes. "_Please_ be careful, now I see maybe that you are actually quite accident-proof since you find trouble, not trouble finds you."

"Huh?"

He rolls his eyes. "I used to think that you were _accident-prone_ since trouble seemed to _find you_, now its vice-versa since I know you go looking for it."

"I do not! It's not my fault venting-systems are a breeding ground for trouble!" I sniff poshly. "Maybe _you_, being the prefect, should get ghost-busters or something in to get rid of all that trouble in there!"

He laughs, I grin, his laughter seemed very familiar, like I'd heard it in a dream, or sometime a long time ago. It made me happy to hear him laugh, since he didn't seem to do it often around other people.

"So how long have you been doing this for?"

"8 weeks or so…" I say slowly.

"Ah. I see… so your leg?"

"Well, I tried to turn around… and those vents are quite small…"

He chuckles. "Bad idea."

I nod knowingly. "Yes, I have first-hand experience on that one, my leg still burns!"

He grins. "Okay, so why are you here now, at midnight?"

"Well… you will laugh."

"Probably."

I glare. "Aren't you _encouraging_, anyway, I needed math homework help…" I grin.

He laughed. "I see. Well, Naruto is fast asleep," he paused and frowned. "I could hear his snoring from the bathroom…"

I sigh. "Finally! Somebody who agree's! Both Naruto and Sas-sam!" I go pale again, then try to cover it and start again. "Sam both think that his snoring isn't that bad!"

Kimimaro chooses to ignore my slip of ze tongue and nods. "I'm waiting for the towers to crumble."

I grin. "My thoughts exactly."

We stayed there for a good 2 hours while he helped me with my math h/w, you know, he took finding me coming out of a vent quite well. I guess most people get used to me, and as soon as they recognise it's me in the vent then they relax. Damnit. I have made a reputation for myself.

… Well at least now I have something to live up too.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**HELLOO ALLL! Thanks SO MUCH for reading reviewing, it really DOES mean ze world to me! Like I remember reading a/n's and going 'pah, as if' and then I started writing and now I'm like 'okay, sorry, I believe you now! NOO! DON'T RUN AWAY! I REALLY MEAN IT!' so THANKS SO MUCH! **

**Glad you are liking it! Okay, some questions I can't answer because I would be stupid to. If yours isn't answered…. Shhhh. You never asked. ;) you are also a pretty cool plot-guesser. And shhhhh. You never asked. **

**(P.s. I LUURRVVEE your questions. The sad thing is I am actually quite proud of you if you guess right because… well, I don't know, but I am. Hehe.) **

**1. When is Gaara coming back? Hmmmm. You shall see, my child. (haha, like 19 people asked that Q.) **

**2. How do I find inspiration to write this? well, in ze world my dear! Once you look hard enough I find it is quite hilarious, infact, the other day I got attacked by a spitting 4-yr-old! It was quite a traumatic experience. But really, I find inspiration in my friends, and music. Music is possibly the best thing ever, if your ever stuck, find somewhere totally quiet then make it loud with awesome music. **

**3. Will I ever stop writing? Well, I don't plan too! Not yet, anyway, hopefully one day I will be able to write my own book and not crazy fanfiction :P **

**4. Yes, Australia is FULL of kangaroo's. EVERYWHERE. I have some in my backyard. They are quite evil, if you ask me. And as much as I wish we aussie's COULD ride them, we can't. They are actually really nasty and killed my neighbours dog:O I really don't want to be the one to try riding kangaroo's. You can, if you want, just make sure I'm there with the video camera :P **

**THANKS HEAPPPSS!**


	17. Exams

**It's DISCLAIMER TIME!: Don't own Naruto, do own Sorano, conclusion: DISCLAIMERS ARE LLLAMMMEE! But yet, so legally binding…. :D **

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Chapter Seventeen: **

_If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either – Dick Cavvet _

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Thursday 17/3/18 – YESS! THEY ACTUALLY WROTE BACK QUICK! **

My letters looked a touch crumpled, Naruto was quite sad when he handed them too me, and really nervous again. I patted him on the back, I think he musta seen Sasuke in the halls somewhere.

"What _happened_ to these?" I examine the edge of the envelope, it seemed torn. I frown.

"Oh, I think the Postie musta got them wet…" he said, almost guiltily, and pointing to the edge that was a kinda of musky yellow colour. I grimace.

"Stupid Postie…" then shrug, and tear it open. It was wet too.

Naruto looked nervous again. I punch his shoulder. "Seriously, stop fretting, you are so jumpy these days." I grin at him, and he smiles back, and relaxes a bit while I lie back to read my letters, Shika's was first as usual.

_Hey Sora, _

_What's up, nothing much here, yes, I wrote back quick this time. Vents. Great. I should remember to de-vent any house you choose to live in from now on. _

_Sakura is happy, she got high-grades in most classes she takes here. Haha. I hear at your school if you don't take certain classes you're screwed. Hahahaha. Sucked in, I just like school being over because I can sleep in when I want too (I work late). _

_Oh! And something weird happened the other day, somebody was enquiring at the school (Konoha High) to where you'd gone. She look- _

Here I stopped and frowned, it looked like there was white-out on the page. Strange, not like Shika to make a mistake… oh well. Maybe he is becoming more human and less superbrain, my theory is he is 80.1 brain, 10 famous books, 4.5 Human and 6.4 hair.

Yes. That's right. He is more hair then human. DUNDUNDUN! Anyway…

_She looked about 40. Know anyone related to that? I don't know, just thought you'd like to know about strangers asking where you were. _

_Write back, Hope Naruto isn't too schizophrenic, _

_Shika_.

_p.s. no, your brain can't storm. Don't listen to Sakura. _

_P.p.s. I'm worried about why you ask… _

I grin, put the letter aside and move onto Sakura's letter. It was only a touch wet, less then the other one. I open the seal and it comes off easily.

_Hey Sora! _

_How are ya babe? Good? I hope so! Shika is awesome, Iruka says thanks for the support on the anti-dirty-books front. Shika was worried about your … erm… ad__vent__ures. He says we need to take out the venting system in all yours homes since he doesn't want to clean the remains out from the gutters. He is quite the nice friend, isn't he? He is just lazy. He isn't fit enough to fit in a vent anyhoo. Haha. _

_Anyway, Yeah, there was some random asking for you at Konoha Hell High. Weird. Can your brain storm? YES! I mean, when I'm angry I have a little me that is very stormy and storms about the place. Shika disagrees, but I'm right. _

_Kakashi is here, and says that he has a little anti-social person who reads the gossip on the wall in his rollcall. He says the boy's a touch emo and seems to have skinny-jeans glued to his legs. _

_I reckon you two were separated at birth. Except you want to glue a mattress to your legs… not jeans. _

_I don't know which is worse. Oh well, I said as long as they are cool jeans I can deal. But mattresses are very last season. Gosh, keep up with the times Sora! Hehe. Anyway, we are all happy here, Hope Naruto isn't driving you too insane, slap Sasuke for me. _

_Love Sakura. _

I grin and put the letters with my others and sit by Naruto, lying down next to him. "Cheer up emo kid." Say, pulling his cheek.

"Why, what's the point?"

I laugh. "You do that well, now smile." I pull his mouth into a smile, then laugh at the agro-ness in his eyes that gave away my happy-pulled-up-smile.

He glared, then sighed and grinned. "Fine, smiling."

I nod. "It's an improvement, I guess…"

We stay in my dorm just talking for a long while, until the conversation turns once again to what we're doing once Sasuke is found. I don't like this topic.

"Where you gonna go?" I ask, staring at the roof.

"Home, probably, I miss everyone there." He said. "You?"

"No clue." I admit. "I try not to plan that far ahead, I find long-term plans should not be plans but guidelines, because fate seems to like seeing us grasp pitifully at our dreams and then shove them away at the last minute…"

Naruto grins. "Yeah, it does that, doesn't it?"

"I prefer to let the tide carry me, fighting the waves can be dangerous and I always seem to inhale water." I grumble. "If that makes any sense…"

"None at all, you have been listening too much in Human Mind haven't you?" he asked. I grin.

"I should really stop that, it's a bad habit to get into."

Naruto nodded. "I agree, waiting and seeing what happens is a good choice."

I look at him funny. "Yeah, maybe." And grab a pen and paper to write my reply.

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Sunnders – 20/3/18 – YAY FOR SUNDAY! YAY FOR SLEEPING! YAY FOR IT'S 4PM! **

Mmm. I love sleeping. It should become a national sport. I would win at sleeping. Mmmmm.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Monday 21/3/18**

Ohnuuu! EXAMS! Term is nearly ovverr and I have a tonne of exams coming up! OHHNUU! Naruto is throwing a fit because they just sprung all these crazy exams that are like next week on us out of nowhere. We were quite comfy in our shell. But nooo.

Anyway, point being I have to studdyyy. Nooz. STUUDYYING! It requires so much effoorrtt and interest! Which I have none for 90 of my subjects.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**7:29**

Ohnuuuu. Stressss. Ohnuuuu.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**9:46**

Ohnoooooooooooooo! I might have to go and find Naruto or Kim. They'll know how to make me feel better when I am stressing.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**12midnight**

I vented to Kimimaro's room, he was in bed reading and I kinda just dropped from the ceiling, it is a lot easier now I don't have to worry about being secretive and the such.

I just landed next to him all pale and crazy and started talking away about tests. He blinked a few times, and then shook himself. "Erm… hello."

"Oh, hello, anyway! Back to what I was saying…." He grinned and nodded as I launch into my exam-stress-speech.

It had gotten cold so I made him share the blanket while he confidently reassured me I'd pass HM (human mind) because there was no wrong answer besides 'Humans are smart.' Which meant all I had to worry about was science and math, because I was in the top 20 of our year for English, and should pass easy.

"Yeah, but your in the top FIVE percent, so I'm probably a dumb shit to you." I grumble, he shakes his head.

"Smarter then me, trust me."

I shake my head now. "Uh-uh, would you crawl through a vent if you had the opportunity just because you were bored?" He opens his mouth to reply, but I go on. "and THEN try to turn around in said vent, after realize you had left a chair on a desk under the open vent, in a room where a teacher had locked you in that smelt of old peanuts?"

"Okay, possibly the first part…" he frowns and I laugh. "But the second part, erm, no I think that's only you."

We talk for ages, and eventually I notice the pills on the bed-side table I was next too. "Erm, what are these?" He seems to blush, I tilt my head to one side and try to say the crazy words in italics on the front of the container, then fail. "Okay, in simply English, please."

"I just need iron," he says dismissively. "Nothing much."

"Hm? That's alotta iron tablets…"

"It's nothing!" he says a bit too sharply. I raise my eyebrows, he looks away. "It really is nothing. Don't worry. You have exams for that."

I stop my small questioning session at that. "Okay…" then shrug. "Anything new?" I ask.

"Jirobo is trying to diet." Kimimaro went back to the grinning person I knew, not the cold one. He was so different. I'm not sure which one was the real Kimimaro.

I laugh. "I'm sure the hungry kid's in the land-of-waves that get hit by tsunami's when he earthquakes around will be glad."

He grins back. "He complains more and more about how he is wasting away."

"Which is impossible." I say, grinning, then sigh. "You are really two different people, you know." He moved his head to one side in question, I shrug. "You are so cold, then you smile, and it's like I am seeing two different people." I explain.

"_You_ see two different people, everyone else only sees one." He says, his eyes turning cold again. "I don't know why, you seem to be easy to talk too, like I could tell you all my secrets without one second-thought _if_ I could."

I smile wryly. "I get that a lot."

He grins. "I'm sure."

"You should be." I assure him, then smile. "I should go, it's probby like daylight hours in a few minutes."

He nods. "Go on, the vent is there."

I shiver. "The vent will be soo cold! What happened to summer, man? It's only a bit into autumn."

I complain all the way as I crawl into the small space, you know, I am quite glad I am not claustrophobic because that would take all the fun out of life right about now.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Hello All! Okay, okay, okay, you've cracked me! GAARA WILL TURN UP! Okay, I did put this story under 'Gaara' so yes. Hahaha. But I'm not telling you WHEN!! MWAHAHAHAH! When and HOW being the main questions, I'm open to guesses because most of the time they are hilariously close and awesome. Anyway, how are you all? Good I hope, I am fiiiine. Cooking tonight, so I need to hurry. **

**Luurve you all THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING READING! **

**Love to-love-is-to-lie (no lieeess, I promise) **


	18. Studying

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**Chapter Eighteen: **

_Most people would rather be certain they're miserable than risk being happy.  
- __Robert Anthony_

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**Wedders 23/3/18 – end of term in 21 days. Tests next week. I am very worried. Why didn't they tell us BEFORE!? Usually you get a touch more notice damnit! **

Ohnuuu. We were given revision sheets from our Math-Sensei, who feels sorry for us, and English, who doesn't but his pay will get reduced if we fail. Better get studying.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4:37**

Okaayy. Englishh. Hmmm. He seems to have given us a picture of a shoe.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**4:38**

It even isn't a cool shoe! God. Great way to inspire us mr. English sensei.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**4:42**

What did we even have to do anyway? Or is the test just a shoe?

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**4:45**

Ohhh. I see. There are QUESTIONS!

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**4:56**

_Evaluate: How does the advertisement use AIDA to bring in potential buyers? _

Answer: IT DOESN'T! IT IS A SHOE! ON A HILL! Now, if it was that snazzy huskvana ad with the chainsaws and the 'na, I don't want any other stinky chainsaws!' I would say it is just plain awesome and it doesn't matter, buuuuuuuuuut it's not. It's a shoe.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**5:04**

That's it. I'm finding Kimimaro.

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**9:17 **

I walked there, seeing as it was under curfew and Kimimaro does exactly approve of my crawling through vents. He was glad to see I used the door, Naruto was glad I visited too, I realized with a guilty conscience I hadn't really talked to him lately.

We all sat near the lounge and I asked them about English. Naruto said that it was a good ad. I said he had no taste in good shoes. He moped. I laughed.

Kimimaro and I swapped answers (being as I told him I had something, then ran off with his book, then realized he had my book and just had to scrawl down his stuff on a piece of Kleenex. And writing on Kleenex is quite hard, it requires SKILL. Skill which I _don't have_!)

So I have now, a book and a few pieces of Kleenex with pen on them. Anyway! It was a nice afternoon and I helped Naruto with his Science study, and Kimimaro tested me on my knowledge on druggie artists. Then I made coffee. And Naruto demanded some, so I made Kimimaro a cup, because that's just the way I work. Hehe.

Eventually Naruto looked too sad, so I made him some coffee anyway. Life isn't so bad here, I guess. Tests make me SOOOO nervous though. Seriously, like one tiny thing can upset me when I am in test-mania.

Errgg. Need an early night for once, I have been going to bed at like 3am lately and I am really dead.

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**Friday 25/3/18 – It's exactly a month till my Bday, you know? 19 days left of term. 3 days until science exam. **

Naruto is over. We are studying like studybugs on studydrugs. That's how hard we are studying. Science isn't too hard for me, but Naruto hates it. I sigh. "Okay, elements, you do know all the basic ones off by heart, right? Because you get extra marks for using their abbreviated names." I tell him.

"Er…. Copper is… erm… L?"

"No, foolish fool! You didn't learn these? We were made to learn at least the first 15 or so in year ten!" I snap. "Errrg… okay, Hydrogen…?"

"H?"

"Bingo… Carbon?"

"….C?"

"Good… Nitrogen?"

"….N?"

"Silver?"

"…S?"

I glare. "You don't know these, do you? You were just telling me the first letter in the name."

"Hehh… heh…" he grins.

I sigh, and dig through my science notes to find the sheet I had photocopied out of my old book. "Periodic table. Learn it." I say, handing it to him.

He studies it for a second. "Yuck. Whoever made this was stupid. Why would you call Iron Fe?"

"Because I was taken." I say, flicking through my science book.

"No you weren't…." He looks at me funny. "You make no sense."

I sigh. "No! 'I' was taken! Not _I_." I glare. "Sometimes I worry about you, you know."

He grins. "I can say the same, Mrs. I crawl through vents."

"Hey, at least I FIT in a vent fatty!"

He gasps. "You did not just say that!"

I grin. "Oh yes I did!"

He goes sombre-faced. "You do know what this means."

I join him in sombre-ness. "I do believe it would mean…" I edge towards a pillow. "WARR!" And throw it at his face. He laughs.

"Well, I was going to say we would have to weigh ourselves, but… if you insist!" he throws the pillow back at I laugh.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**27/3/18 – Sunday. Oh shiiiit. I NEED to study. I can't even remember anything! ANYYYTHINNGG! I think we have Human Mind too, but I aint studying for that. No way. **

Errrggg. I hate study. I need chocolate. Lot's of it.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:34**

Ohnuu. I need an early night, but I'm only half way through Human Mind! Okay, so I said I wouldn't study… but I was too stressed! Anyway, I need to sleep… but I can't! ohnuu! INDECISIONS!

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**Monday 28/2/18 – I bet you anything failed. **

Okay, I was so stressed in Science, I broke four of the supplied pencils until the Sensei told me that I only got one more and If I broke it that was it. Then I worked really slowly and carefully.

Betcha those pencils were just shotty. Grrr.

……………………………………………………………………………………….

**10:17 **

English on Wed. Need to study. Okay… verse… rhyme and verse…. Ohnuu! WHAT IS A SOLILOQUY!?

Damnit. Seniors are coming back from their excursion soon. I might be run-over.

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**Tuesday 29/3/18 5:55 (haha. Five five five!) **

Went to Naruto's to study for Math. He isn't in my math but we do the same stuff. Kimimaro was reading a book on the cough while I lay next to Naruto and he tested me on Math. Kimimaro and Naruto don't talk, but seem to accept each other's presence well, like they both have this unspoken pact that I am both of their property and can be shared. I'm not sure I like it, but as long as they aren't biting each other's head off I can deal.

"Okay, the product of X is the same as Y times L, is Y is 76 and B is 12,-"

I blink. "Okay, I can understand why X & Y are at the party, but when did B get invited!? And why did he only bring $12 when Y brought $76!?" I demand.

Naruto sighs. "Okay, I don't know HOW you set that question out in your head, but I think you are seriously confused…"

"Bet L is more popular then B anyway. B shouldn't even BE at that party." I grumble. Kimimaro chuckles. Naruto glares.

"Focus!" he snaps. "Now, question 2, if Gerry walks twice the length of a 100m football field and Lenny walks an 8th of Gertrude's-"

"Yuck. Gertrude is an ugly name." I wrinkle my nose.

"Listen! Okay, what about, A walks twice the length of a football field, B walks –"

"Erg. Not B again, he just turns up everywhere! Seriously, was he even invited to the footie game?" I ask.

"No. now listen-"

"Then why was he THERE?" I demand. "It should be _S_. _S_ is never taken anywhere."

"Okay okay, S walks an 8th of what N walks, what is A's –"

"This is _boooooring._ Go back to the way with Gertrude."

Naruto snaps. He throws down the book and storms off. "YOU ARE IMPOSSIBLE SORA!"

I grin. "Good, now I can study in peace." Kimimaro chuckles again.

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**Thursday 31/3/18 - YESS! TESTS NEARLY OVER!**

I only have Chem! Which is eaasssy. Since our Chem teacher just sits there and says 'this is …. Uh…. Chemistry…. And… we do… uh… stuff in… chemistry.'

Yay. I may have to go out and navigate my way around the crowds to celebrate with Naruto, who still has Advanced Math & biology.

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**HELLO ALLLLL! Thanks SO MUCH for reviewing! Really, means the world! I LOOVEE your long reviews (hinthint, nudgenugde) thanks heaps. Yes, the plot thickens! Hehe. Hope you enjoyed it! (p.s. OHHNUU! We have Cervical Cancer vaccines soon! OHHNUUU!!! Not NEEDLES!) **


	19. Voice

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**Chapter Nineteen: **

_You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is FINALLY better then your dreams – Dr. Seuss _

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**6:28**

I grabbed my jacket (as it is quite chilly tonight) and headed over to Naruto's dorm, it was kinda empty…. Maybe the bus hasn't arrived yet… everyone wants the Seniors to come back, they are the 'life of the party'. I don't it is nice and easy to MOVE without them.

Kimimaro had finished all his tests now, and the man with 7-going-on-8 chins has a cold. I was nearly blown away by his sneezing and went purple because I was trying to breathe as little as possible around him.

"Still wanna teach?" I ask, we were sitting in the lounge again, Naruto was studying hard for his Biology test, and angry because all ours were done.

"Yeah, but the other prefects all hate that idea." He said, grinning wryly.

I nod my approval. "Keep it up then." He laughs.

"Kabuto asked the other day why he hadn't seen you in ages. He actually doesn't mind your injuries, usually he hates it when the Sound Four bring in patients to his dorm."

"Hey, he's like 25 and is still doing his degree, isn't it like illegal for him to practise?"

"Yes, but nobody else notices." He grins, I smile back.

"Urrggg! I HATE BIOLOGY! I thought I'd never say this, but I wish bloody Jiraiya-Sensei was teaching!" Naruto cut in.

"Yeah, but he was a perverted frog-obsessed attempt at a man." I say.

"But at least he was a good Blodge sensei! This one SUCKS!" Naruto complained. "I think she is an English sensei." He grumbled.

I laugh. "Really? Are they THAT understaffed?"

"No-one likes biology, so they had to put a semi-competent English sensei in." he grumbles. "And she sucks."

"You'll live." I grin. "You know who I miss?" I say, changing the subject.

"Who?" Naruto asks moodily, flicking through his notes.

"Anko-Sensei, she was always so delightfully evil…" I say wistfully. "And Iruka Kakashi of course, but they are more friends now."

Naruto nods. "Yeah, Anko was quite insane, remember when she told that freshmen that if she stepped on her staffroom step she would explode?" he laughed. "The look on the girls face! hahaha"

I glare. "Naruto, that was me." He stops, looks at me, then laughs even harder, I glare. "It wasn't funny! I WAS SCARED!"

He just laughs harder. "Hahahha… You! Hahahah… it was!... hahah!" is all I make out before I get a pillow from the couch and stuff it over his face, contemplating over whether to use his pillowed-face as a seat.

Then Kimimaro spoke up. "The seniors are back…" He said, sighing.

I glare, removing the pillow from Naruto's face. "Damn, I was enjoying being able to move."

Kimimaro chuckled and I sat up next to Naruto, who was gasping for air… hmmm… maybe I held that pillow on for a touch too long…

We listened and heard the rumbling laughter and footsteps come running up the hall. "Well, Naruto, continue studying." I say briskly, dusting myself off. "I'm getting out of here before I'm trapped by fat seniors forever."

I walk out the door, and nearly run into a solid muscly thing, take one look at the crowed hallway (which isn't much seeing as my short-ness only allows me to see shoulders and occasionally hair) then walk back in.

"Back already?" Naruto grinned, seeing my mussed hair and distressed look.

"I think I'll be staying a little longer…" I say.

"Figured." Naruto grinned.

I stayed there for the rest of the arvo, until I heard the noise die down, and judged it safe to go outside. "Okies, buh-bye!" I waved and stepped outside the door. Once again. I returned two minutes later looking dishevelled.

They laughed. "Still no luck?"

I glare. "I'm taking the vent."

I crawled into the small space using the bedside table, and grinned down at the hallway, listening to the cheery voices of seniors. Hahha. That's right, they are probably lying in wait to crush small girls. But no! NOT ME! Hahahah! I am too smart to be crushed! I grim smugly, and poke my tongue out at the nearest opening.

"…Yes, yes, I know, test on Thursday.  
"He said that?..."

"…. Lobsters like to eat prawns!"

"But isn't that like, cannibalism for crustations?"

"No, never…"

I laughed, I had paused for a second and so much conversation could be heard.

Then a voice my ears were well attuned to floated by, all the mental-stitches I had sewn myself up with seemed to be strained, pulled, my whole body wanted to fling itself at the owner of the voice in desperation. The whole world was silent for a moment, as I listened. But the voice was gone. And I sat and gasped for a moment, trying to dull the pain, making sure the stiches weren't broken, or stretched, because if they were it would take a while to sew all the wounds come back up again.

It was just like a dream. Bad dream, a very bad dream, but a dream none-the-less, even now I'm not really convinced I heard it, mainly since it is quite impossible… it's like I can't even say the name, for fear the dream will vanish all-together, and I won't even have that to hang onto. It was a catch 22, I couldn't totally let go of hope, but I could never move on if I didn't. So I just stitched the wounds that would never heal, and learnt to live.

I shook myself, when I was in the vent I was in a daze, all that mattered was to be out of that spot incase the voice came back, if I did, I knew I would have to tear my self out of the vent then and there and find the owner.

So I got home, I didn't even think once, I was totally silent, it was like my body was running on instinct alone, so I got out of the vent, walked silently to the bathroom, took a shower, brushed my teeth, and went to bed. And then I woke up, and suddenly started to think again. And now I'm here, still afraid to look at what happened.

I'm going to sleep, maybe real dreams can replace waking dreams.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Saturday 2/4/18 – Studying **

You know, I had the strangest dream on Thursday, and seem to have written it down. I am quite insane, you know. Sometimes I can hardly figure out what reality is and what is dreaming. Hahaha. I am quite the strange one.

Studying for Chem, it's on Tuesday, Naruto is freaking out about Biology since he is quite certain he failed, which I disagree on since he studied from here to the-land-of-waves and back.

Seniors are quite distracting and I keep being run over in the halls.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**3:23 - Hahah! Guess what? **

On mooondi the Highschoolies are having their swimming carnival, and we get the day off to cheer and eat fatty food from the canteen! YESS! It was just over the College-PA system then! YYYAYYY!

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Sunday 3/4/18 **

Went to Naruto Kim's dorm. Stayed there and watched Naruto fret about 'failing' Biology. Me and Kimimaro ended up played cards (I forced him too, he didn't seem to enthusiastic but I assured him the game was easy-lemon-squeezy) while Naruto brushed up AGAIN on biology so next time he'd be okay.

I put down my Queen. "I think I've created a monster, I taught him study tricks and now he is over-obsessive."

Kimimaro handed over his other Queen. "Damn… Yes. Maybe… hmm, eight?"

I hand him over my card. "You suck. Naruto! Seriously, you're becoming a balding pigeon again!"

"I'm going BALD!?" he said, and went pale, running immediately to the bathroom to check his scalp yelling "THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN FOR ANOTHER 45 YEARS!" I sigh.

"Jack?" I ask.

He shakes his head. "Go fish."

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Monday – 9:00am **

YESS! Day off. On a … MONDAY! Yay for swimming carnivaaaal. Going to meet up with Naruto then head down.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**9:05**

I might need actual shoes. Fluffy slippers don't do well on wet surfaces….

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**Hello All! Had a wonderful weekend away! IT WAS SO FUN! It involved Disabled Trolleys, electric lint-removers & G-stings… :P hehe. But it was less kinky then it sounds, I swear, I just have about 7 pairs of quite awesome undies now. Hehe. Anyway! How are you alll? Good I hope! Thanks heaps for reading! **

**I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOOOUUUUU!!!! **


	20. Certainty

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**Chapter Twenty: **

_I shot an arrow into the air, and it stuck. - __Graffito_

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**6:54**

It was really fun! The pool is more like a full aquatic centre because this school is too rich for it's own good, all the Highschoolies are so cute! Seriously, they're all so small and adorable! Hehe.

Anyway, the pool has two 100m pools with 12 lanes EACH! Most Colleges were there because it meant a day off, we all sat and cheered for our favourite team, mine just being Green coz it's the best colour ever. Naruto went red, and then yellow won so we were both sad.

Kimimaro was there with the rest of the Sound Four, giving out medals to the winners and awarding the trophy to the captain of the house.

One of the little year 8 people (I am now JUST taller then most of them) slipped over and I ran over madly and hugged them. "AWW! ARE YOU OKAY!?" I yelled madly. "DO YOU NEED A BANDAID!?"

The little kid was shaking. "Er…. n-n-no!" and ran off.

Naruto was there killing himself laughing and I glared. "Well, who knows, he might have needed a band-aid!" I say, sulking.

Also, I have made a shocking discovery! NARUTO HAS A FANCLUB! I was coming back from the canteen with Cola and sausage rolls when I heard the unmistakable mating call of the fangirls, uncontrollable girly giggling…

I wander over, and shove the roll in Naruto's hand, and sip my Cola, when I hear it again, gosh, I survey the area for any hot guys, so that I might be able to enjoy the view, but find only a crazy guy with a bad case of acne. I frown, then turn to look at the fangirls, then turn to look around… hmm.. there was an acceptable guy in front, but he wasn't exactly fangirl material, I turn, look at the fangirls, and then do the same… weird, I think, then shrug and sit back to enjoy watching year 8 people fall over.

But soon enough, the increase giggling starts to piss me off, Naruto doesn't notice, to I turn and glare at them, they don't notice so I trace their eye-contact and it lands on Naruto, I shake myself, then try again, still I couldn't find any hot guys… I shrug again, getting more annoyed.

I repeat this process like a million times before they finally leave because they're out of bounds. I finally relax. "I hate fangirls." I mutter, Naruto nods.

After a while I excuse myself to use the bathroom, and eventually snap when I come back out to find them back again. This time I snap. "What the hell are you guys looking at!?" I say angrily.

They turn and blush, one of the more outgoing ones giggles. "Your boyfriend there, he's cute as!" they all giggle again.

I blink. "My boyfriend? I don't have one…"

They smirk. "Even better, the blonde is so hot. Is he new?" they ask.

"Yeah…" I say, then grin. "Girlies, I wouldn't get your hopes up though." I smirk, and wave and walk off.

But how weird!? NARUTO! HOT!? Like, he's never been ugly, but he is my best friend! EWWW! Not right! Naruto! Of all the guys! NNAARRUUTTOO! I mean, like, yeah, he IS cute, he has huge blue eyes and perfect skin, and nice hair, but I mean that in a friend way! Not in the HOT way! Seriously. Ew. It just doesn't work!

Now, infact, he is sitting next to me reading (Advanced math, was s'pose to be today but he gets an extra day to stress thanks to the swimming carnival) and keeps being worried because I keep looking at him and shuddering.

"What is your PROBLEM!?" he snaps after like the 5th look-and-shudder session.

"Well, you know those fangirls today?"

"…Yeah, you got really pissed off after a while."

I glare. "Well, turns out they were YOUR fangirls." I tell him.

He gapes. "I have a fanclub? _I _have _a fanclub_!?"

I nod. "Yeah, seems so. Isn't that hilarious? Like seriously! Who would-a thought?"

He glares. "I'll take that as a compliment, if I can be… But really?" he grins excitedly. "Haha! And they _all_ had fanclubs in high-school, BUT _NOW_ WHO HAS ONE!?"

I sigh. "Naruto, may I point out _you_ can't exactly have a fanclub and enjoy it?"

"I have a fanclluub, I have a faanclub! I have a FAAAANNNCLUB!" he sung.

"Great, now your ego is inflating even more." I sigh, and throw his book at him. "Go back to reading, blondie."

He hums his tune of 'I have a fanclub, I have a fanclub.' Over and over until I snap and kick him out.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**10:18**

I have a fancllub, I have a fanclub… dum dum de dum dum… hmm hm hm hm hmmm…

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**10:20**

I hate Naruto. He got his stupid fanclub song stuck in my head.

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**Wednesday 6/4/18 – I heard her. I know I did. **

Hope. It hurts, hope hurts more then despair, you'd never think it would, but it does. It kills in the nicest possibly way. And today gave me hope. I heard her, I heard her and I know it. I was in the Cafeteria, and was walking over to Naruto with the tray, Seniors take up the left-hand side of the lunch area now thanks to them being back from excursion, and as I was walking through conversation once again reached my ears…

"Yeah, snow is really cold and I got it down my…."

"Ew. Details."

"… Yeah, he said it. I know, I was listening."

"….Hey, heard the rumour about the big rat in the vents…"

Then the voice came back, I wasn't dreaming, it was real, I heard the voice I knew so well in the vent, and the stitches pulled again and strained as the cut's threatened to break open and bleed again. Naruto looked at me questioningly, why had I stopped and gone pale in the middle of the room? The whole world was silent again, it was only her and me. Nobody else. I dropped my tray and wheeled around, running in the direction of the voice, ignoring the surprised cries of the people who got splashed with lunch as I pushed through the crowds…. But it was gone. I'd lost it again.

The noise came crashing back in like waves hitting the shore, I was the sand, and I got washed away, back into the ocean I'd tried so hard to escape. There were people everywhere, and I just wanted to think, so I ran. And I ran, and I ran. And I reached the garden's outside the pool area, and I sat.

I'd heard her. I knew I had, and I rolled up my jeans to shove my legs in the pool and lie back and sigh. I had heard Temari. I wasn't mad. I was right, and I wasn't sure which I would have preferred.

I heard Gaara's sister, I know I did. I don't make that mistake twice.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**9:00 **

I spent all afternoon knocking on doors. I need to find her dorm. I am so happy! Think! If Temari is here, won't Gaara be here? They are NEVER separate! EVER! He's HERE! I don't have to leave, because he's come to me! All I need to do is find Temari's dorm! Easy-lemon-squeezy!

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**9:23**

I'M SO EXITED! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! HE'S HEERREEE!!!

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Thursday 7/4/18 **

Once again, I knocked on doors 7-18 today. 11 dorms down, (because when I'm at a door I need to wait an extra ten mins while the person stares at me and tries to make conversation to get out of exam studying.

I told Naruto, too. I had run to his dorm first thing when we were let out in the morning before class, barged in, and leapt on him. "NARRUTTOO!" I'd screamed.

"What!? Freaking hell, this better be good!" he said irritably.

I grin. "Oh, it is!" I assure him.

He sat up and rubbed his eyes. 'Well, go on, what is it?"

"Temari is here." I say excitedly.

"Really?" He asks, surprised.

I nod. "And they are never separate! Gaara and Kankuro must be here too!" I exclaim.

Naruto frowns. "Sor, I don't know… they can go separate ways…"

I shake my head. "Nah, they are always together! Gaara is here! All I need to do now is find Temari and ask her where he is!"

"Sora, it probably wasn't even her, you know."

"It was! I know it was. I know what I heard." I say firmly. "He's here."

"Just because Temari is here, wouldn't mean _He's_ here…"

I fix my gaze with Naruto's. "He is. I know he is."

Naruto looked at me, it seemed pain welled in his eyes, he closed them as if he knew they were w window to his soul at the moment, and he touched my cheek. "Just don't get your hopes up too high." He said softly.

I smiled. "Don't worry! I know these things!" I say, and run off to check another 3 dorms before school.

Not even Naruto's pessimism can make me doubt. I know their both here. Possibly not Kankuro since he wasn't the brightest of crayons, but Temari and Gaara, DEFINATLY!

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**Hellooo ALLL!!! Wassupp? I am very happy! For no particular reason, really, but being happy for no particular reason is always the best way to be happy! Hope you are all happy too, have a good day! Love me. **

**p.s. THANKS FOR READING!!! (Plus reviewing, hint hint) **


	21. Search

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**Chapter Twenty-one: **

_It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny.__ - __Jean Nidetch_

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**10:40**

18-23 of the Girls dorms down, only 25 to go. I know he's here. I know it. Naruto may doubt it, but I KNOW it! You know what I'd noticed, until recently I'd hardly ever mentioned Gaara, it was like my brain had made a pact to try and remember him as least as possibly, not forget, just not remember… if that makes sense.

But I don't mind thinking of him now! BECAUSE SOON I'LL SEE HIM! He's here! He came to me! It'll be like the good ol' days again. I can tell. Everything is going right again.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:00 – I neeed to make Naruto agree to help me check dorms! The quicker the better! **

Going for an ad-_vent_-ture. Be back soon.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**1:25**

Naruto doesn't seem too enthusiastic. "Sora, you sure it wasn't just a slip up? I know your ears aren't that reliable…"

I sigh. "For the seventy-millionth time, no! It wasn't! I KNOW what I heard Naruto, and I KNOW Temari wouldn't leave Gaara unless she was sure he wouldn't hurt himself, and that doesn't happen with Gaara!"

"I'm sure he can look after himself fine…" Naruto said, hinting at something.

I glare. "'Not hurting yourself' and 'Looking after yourself' are different things in my book." I say, sniffing primly.

He rolls his eyes. "Well, you look."

"I will!" I pout, and get up, storm into Kimimaro's room, and without even saying 'hi/bye' crawl into the vent and go, he looks mildly surprised but then just goes back to his reading.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Friday 8/4/18**

Naruto came over first thing in the morning with mail! I missed out on checking more dorms, but I can make up for it by skipping Human Mind study and looking then. Once again, they looked wet, but apparently it's been raining in Konoha so I guess it's kinda explained there. Naruto looked scared again, he hasn't seen Sasuke in ages so I guess it's okay, well, maybe HE should be out knocking on dorm after dorm to find his friend/gay lover!

Anyway, Sakura's letter was really short and had been cut off at the bottom, Shika must have got to it, hehe. Shika's wasn't there at all, but it did say at the bottom that he was studying and couldn't be disturbed.

Anyway, was kinda sad and sent a long reply back saying to make Shika write and that studying is for wimps.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**8:48**

Well, of course they don't know all I did last week was study…

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:52**

Well, then again, I could class myself as a vent-crawling wimp…

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**8:57**

Yeah. Vent-crawling wimp all the way!

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**8:58(.8)**

Or maybe – OR SHIIITT! I HAVE 1.2 MINS TO GET TO CLASS!

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**9:47pm **

Rooms 24-31, checked. It is quite strange, I am checking all girls dorms, but came across Kabuto's dorm somehow, he opened the door and I was so exited because I was so sure it was this one, he looked surprised. "That's strange, you look fine and there's no Kimimaro…" he said.

I knew it was stupid, but I asked anyway. "Is Temari here?" I asked.

He just looked at me strangely. "Okay, maybe I was wrong, what happened?"

"No, I'm fine."

"Come in, I'll get bandages…"

"No! I'm actually sane!"

"… Really now?"

"Okay, bad wording, but I am…erm, unharmed! … I guess." I say hesitantly. He grins.

"Okay then, here for anything? I really have to go, the pool is leaking and I have to check nearly every day now."

"Looking for Temari." I answer. "The pool?" I then ask.

"Yeah, We have a roster, I check today, then Tayuya then that new kid, Uchiha." He scowls. "But Tayuya never does it and that Uchiha kid doesn't look well enough for me to trust him so I look anyway."

I look up. "Really?" then smile. "Okay, well, I better be going then."

"Okay then." He half-smiled in his half-smiling way, adjusted his glasses, and I took my cue to leave.

I spent ages looking through various dorms until in the last one some random redhead tackled me shouting "BBABBY! You came! Hey, I've got an idea that could get us into lot's of trouble- oh…" and then I ran off screaming and had a long long LONG shower.

And now I'm here, feeling quite exited again because I'M FINDING TEMARI! She's gonna be here, and I get to see Gaara! Everything is going to be good and good and AWESOME again!

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**10:09**

I can tell. It's like I can FEEL it, everything is going to be good, the stitches are like, tightening and it's like I'm all nice and sewn up, but not in a hiding way, in a healing way, and it's kinda like I'm on a big pillar, and underneath is all this water I had been drowning in, but suddenly I'm not just floating, I'm FLYING, and I can laugh at the waves that had pushed me around before. I know I'll see Gaara again. And soon!

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**11:34**

I'M SO EXITED I CAN HARDLY BREEATHHEE!

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**Sunday 10/4/18 **

I found her. I am possibly exploding of nervousness. She was in Dorm No. 39 outa 45, I was over this morning on the usual dorm-run, and I was on the 9th door I'd tried that day, I remember thinking 'errg, I need coffee!'

Some random with blue streaks had opened the door, and I had blandly asked "Is Temari here?"

And she had smiled brightly and said "Yeah, I'll go get her!" I remember my stomach was almost exploding with excitement, it was like I had a butterfly farm cultivating butterflies in my stomach just to make me feel as if I was gonna puke.

I remember the breath I took as she rounded the corner and looked at me for the first time, I remember the look of shock on her face, I remember the feeling in my legs that just said 'run, run and don't look back' but I swallowed hard and managed a sad attempt at "Hello…"

She blinked. "S-Sorano?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.

I nod. "Y-Ye-Yeah…" my stuttery goodness had returned with a familiar face, and I curse.

She smiled. "Come in." she motioned for the couch, a lot like the one in Kimimaro/Naruto, Mine, and Kabuto's dorm, I seriously wonder if these people have ANY originality AT ALL.

"How have you been?" She asked after a while, I took a breath in and exhaled slowly.

"Okay, I think." I say hesitantly.

Temari had always been stunning, she was even prettier now, and she was wearing the most adorable red dress and heels, she smiles and I went dizzy. "Good, I heard you got into a bit of a mess." She looked concerned.

I nod. "I guess you could call it that."

"So, how'd you get here?" she asked.

I knew I was pale, I knew I was shaking, and I knew I was afraid to speak because of puking. "I d-don't know, just was the best op-p-tion." I get out.

She smiled sadly. And put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm glad, it's a good school, hey-" then the door bell rang, and our heads flicked towards it, she sighed.

"I better go-" I start.

She nods. "That's my boyfriend, sorry, you picked a bad time." She said apologetically. "We're going out for dinner, but it's a long drive so we have to leave early." She explained, I nodded dumbly.

I didn't even look at the boy, I was just walking, walking nowhere, I wanted to be lost, just to be lost and stay lost, because lost is a kind of limbo where getting out is the main ambition, and when your out, your free, but now I was free and wanted to be lost, and how can one deliberately get lost, when they know exactly where their going?

She waved and said something along the lines of 'Talk to you later, Sorano!' and I just kept walking, because walking was the only function my body could handle, and I walked until I smelt the scent of chlorine and woke up from the stupor I was in, it was weird, in couldn't quite expect what I had wanted in that meeting…

I mean, I was confused, I had really just wanted her to say "Oh, Gaara is next door, go have a look!" but one doesn't exactly say that without warning to a stranger that has searched 37 dorms for them.

I sat on the edge of the large pool, and took off my shoes to put my feet in. What could I expect? I had been so exited and I was just a let down, I guess I'd just have to wait until tomorrow to see her. I won't tell Naruto though, he'll just laugh and say 'told you so' but I know Gaara is here, if she is, he is.

I just need to ask, I guess.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Wednesday 13/4/18 – I can't find her again! Errgg! **

I have left about 30 messages and am CONSTANTLY on the look-out for anyone in that family, it's like she wasn't ever here damnit! Erg.

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**Friday 14/4/18 – at the poolside. **

It's really quite relaxing here, silent, and it's a nice place to think. Temari search is still going, the blue-haired roommate keeps saying 'I've just missed her' and she doesn't look like she'd be the type to lie.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Saturday 15/4/18 – poolsiding again. **

I'M SO NERVOUS! I keep randomly convulsing out of nervousness. Stupid Temari and her away-ness! Errgg. This place has become a real hangout for me, you know, I like it here.

Hahaha. Today I went to see Kimimaro and Naruto for the first time in what's ages for me, since I usually visit like 4 times a day, and they were so glad to see me Naruto even made me complimentary coffee.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:35**

I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM! I'M SO EXITED I MIGHT EXPLODE!!!

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**Hellooo ALLLLL!! How are we all? THANK YOU SOO MUCH!!! I got a FLOOD of reviews for that last chapter! Thanks so much if you reviewed! THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING TOO!!! THHANNKKKYOOUU!! I LUURVVEE YOUU! **

**Lot's o LUURVVEE, to-love-ISNT (In this case)-to-lie. **


	22. Before Lost

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**Chapter Twenty-Two (Half, really):**

_A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.  
- __Doug Larson_

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**Sunday 16/4/18 – you know it's like 9 days until my birthday? **

Oh myy. It's like 9 days until my 19th birthday! Wow. 19, how weird. It's like I shouldn't be 19, I should still be 15 turning 16. 

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**9:24**

Still no freaking Temari! Her roommate told me that she said to visit after 6 and I did and SHE WASN'T THERE! 

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Wednesday 18/4/18 – Errgg. Been on Temari watch all week! **

So bored. I haven't checked today, so I might wander over. I swear, even if it's been like a million years the stupid radio active butterfly farm in my stomach won't go away, I reckon they were all in the stitches, but now they are slowly receding in hope of seeing Gaara the butterflies are free now. Even mental-chainsaws can't get rid of them. 

Hopehopehope. I swear, everything is so much better now I know I'm gonna see Gaara. 

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**Read On, there is mooree…. **


	23. After Found

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Chapter Twenty-Three:**

_The best defence against the atom bomb is not to be there when it goes off.__ - __Anonymous_

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**20/4/18 – Saturday. **

It's been three days since I fell, I was due to be released the day after, but instead they kept me incase anything happened. Seeing as I looked terrible, I knew I did. 

I remember I had visited Temari's dorm for the third time that day, and she'd been there, she apologized for being away so much… and we walked. 

"So, how long have you been here?" she asked, as out feet carried us down the hallway. 

I shrug, impatient to turn the subject to Gaara. "Oh, since a few days before term started." 

"Wow, and to think I didn't notice you!" she says. 

I nod. "Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." I look at her. "How's life been for you?" 

She moves her head to one side, thinking. "Good, I guess. The move was… frustrating… but I dealt with it." 

We turn a corner, and start to walk down the row of boys dorms. "Yeah, we all did." I say quietly. "Anyway, what courses are you taking?" 

"Hm, well, doing: Cooking, Hospitality, Advanced Art, Biology, and Marine Science." She says. "And of course the basics like Math and English as well, just in case." 

I smile. "Yeah, English, art, and Human Mind are my chosen, but since Science and Math are mandatory for 'good results' which is necessary for maintaining my place here, I do them, as well as Chem just for fun and explosive things." I grin. 

She smiles back. "Yeah, it's nice here, and I'm on the Volleyball team, which is fun." I grin. 

"Volleyball?" 

She nods. "I got into it in year 12, it's really fun." 

I shrug. "I don't do many sports, I just walk everywhere and never sit still, and besides that I never do anything exercise-wise, I should be quite fat, really." 

She laughed. "Yeah, I agree, it's people like you who can just stay thin who shouldn't exist." 

I laugh too. And we continue to chatter mindlessly on about things like school, and we're both too scared to bring up the subject of Gaara. Our legs had seemed to carry us out to the pool, and it was really empty and our voices echoed. 

"So, how is everyone?" she asked, and then her phone went off, she growled at it and pulled it out and groaned. "Damn…" 

"Do you need to go?" 

"No, no, go on… how is everyone?" 

I shrug. "Good, Sasuke is here too, you may have seen him, he's the principals pet and Sakura and Shika are both happy as ever." 

She smiles. "Good, I'm glad."

"What about you? Is everyone good?" The phone beeps again. 

She smiles sadly. "Yeah, they are, actually. Kankuro is in an acting troupe, he really likes puppeteering." 

"I would never have guessed…" I say in surprise. "And…?" I trail off. 

"Yeah, me neither." She laughed. "And He's doing well… He is doing very well, actually. He is into politics really." She said, hinting at something. 

I frown. "They teach politics here?" I ask. 

"Here?" she says, and that's when two things happened, her phone went off for the third time, and she opened it. "Sorry, I have to go… I hate schedules." And then it suddenly hit my like bricks that there was a chance he wouldn't be here. 

"Wait! Do they teach politics, I didn't see it on the sheet!" I say quickly. 

She looks at me weirdly. "Er, no, not here, actually politics." 

"How does he do that?" 

"Er, in the government?" She said, looking at me strangely. "Now, I have to go, it was nice talking to you, see you around, Sora." She said, and hugged me quickly before walking off quickly. 

"But… Gaara!" I start to become a touch frantic, running up the poolside to her. 

"Yes?" 

"He's… here, right?" I say, my heart beating a million miles and hour, it was like I had been surrounded by glass, and now it was suddenly all shattering around me. 

"Here?" I prayed for the words she said next to not be true. I prayed and prayed to a god I wasn't even sure I even believed in. "God no, he's in Suna." She said, grinning. "Silly." 

And with that, she walked away. And I stood by the deep end of the pool numb. He wasn't here, the glass was roaring in my ears, it was shattering what I saw and cracking, sending little splinters into my skin, digging and tearing and ripping and scarring and suddenly the stiches broke, and they tore and they let the wounds rip right open and they bled. They bled freely and it hurt, it wasn't just like it was stretching, there was nothing I could do to make them hold the cut together anymore, they were gone, and they had failed to hold up when I had needed them. 

My head swum, I don't know why my reaction was so bad, but there was no inkling of anything else but seeing him in my brain, it wasn't possible that he wasn't here, it couldn't be possible… at all…. Really…. It had to be a lie. It was suddenly hard to breathe, and then the shattering stopped, and the glass lay still. The gushing emotion that had come flowing out of the cuts had stopped to a gentle flow, and I really did find there was no reason to keep breathing when it was so hard… 

And then my legs gave way, and my world went dark, and my head really swam because I fainted right into the deep end of the swimming pool. 

When I woke up I was here, silent, Naruto was at my bedside, and so was Sasuke, Kimimaro leant against the wall, looking blank. I didn't say anything, I just stared at the roof, I shouldn't be alive. I didn't _try_ to die, I just stopped trying to_ live_. There is a difference, but there was a pool, and that helped things along a bit. 

I remember thinking maybe this was just the afterlife, maybe it was all a dream and maybe I'll wake up and go to school and see Gaara and go get milkshakes in the arvo. Infact, I was so involved in this dream I rolled over and tried to hit the imaginary alarm clock on the bedside table, a hand instantly grabbed mine and I opened my eyes and sighed. No, I was here alright, here in the school hospital. Naruto squeezed my hand and I lay limp. 

"Sora…" He said quietly. 

All their eyes flicked to me for a response, but none came, and so he let go of my hand and I rolled over again to grip my blankets and stare at the white walls. What was even the point? He was in Suna, being popular and getting involved in politics. He was probably very rich and successful and he would never come to me… I was so stupid. 

I could feel the cuts, emotion still bled from them, not only where they open now though, they were infected. And it stung to even think about anything to do with him. 

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**21/4/18 – Sunday **

Naruto comes in everyday, he talks to me. But I don't reply. I stare at the roof. The nurse makes me eat, but because I forget to open my mouth most of it ends up on the clean bed. 

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**22/4/18 – Monday **

Today Kimimaro was in again, he talked to me too. Sasuke was here too, and Naruto, obviously. Sasuke was the only one with sense enough to save me another headache. 

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**23/4/18 - Tuesday **

I fell in a pool, I shouldn't even be here. Temari was here for a while, but the nurses said there were too many people and she volunteered to go, I heard the conversation. 

"I feel so bad, I should have realized…"

"Don't beat yourself, none of us thought it'd be this bad…" That was Sasuke. 

"But I should have known she'd want to know about him!" 

"Maybe, but we all thought she got over him a years ago." 

"Somebody once said 'true love lasts a lifetime?'" 

"Yeah, we should have been more careful…" 

"Excuse me, but I think she needs a quiet environment." The nurse had come in. "Can you please leave for a few hours?" 

They leave, and I go back to pretending to be asleep. 

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**24/4/18 – Wednesday **

The doctors said I'm better, but I look worse. So I'm stuck here longer. Naruto practically sleeps here. He talks to me, but I never reply. Sometimes when he thinks I'm asleep he talks to Sasuke about how worried he is, and how he knew this would happen, and that it was his fault…. 

I wish I really could sleep, then I wouldn't hear all of it. but I can't, because I know he'll be there, and I know I will spend my dreams in bliss, but when I wake up I'll fall all the harder. It's not worth the rest.

What kind of girl is afraid of sleeping because of good dreams?

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**25/4/18 – Thursday**

I didn't bother to open my eyes today, I just watched the back of my eyelids and tried to stay awake, eventually it got dark and he left on request of the nurse. I heard him whisper 'happy birthday' and tuck hair behind my ear, Sasuke murmured the same. Nineteen, nineteen and already given up on living. 

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**Hello All, Hope you liked it! THANKS HEAPS FOR READING! don't be too sad, hehe, please review! It means HEAPS! Thanks heaps to the people who have! **

**LLUURVVEE to-love-is-to-lie. **


	24. Alive

**Chapter Twenty-Four: **

_I have a rock garden. Last week three of them died. - __Richard Diran_

**11:39**

Once Naruto had left, the door opened again, I lay still, and then Sasuke's voice broke though the silence. "Sorano, I know your awake." 

I don't reply. 

"Don't even try, I know you're awake. Why won't you talk?" 

'_There's no point_.' I think to myself. 

"There is a point to talking, you know." 

'_No there isn't_.' 

"There is." He sat on the edge of my bed. "I'm not going to say the same crap Naruto said, because obviously that doesn't work." 

'_Good. You got the hint_.' I thought again. 

"But I will say this, I thought you were strong, but obviously you can't keep it up, if not for yourself, for Naruto, he needs you, you're his backbone, until we're all out of here, he needs you healthy and alive, and until he's semi-independent, I suggest you at least act like you are, because he needs you." 

I don't answer. 

"That's all I have to say, think about it," I hear the door open, and he pauses. "Happy birthday, there's presents by the door." 

He closes the door, and I lay still for a while, until guilt gets to me, he was right, I was sulking. Naruto needed me, and if I can't be strong for myself, I have to be for him. I open my eyes, and sit up, my head hurts because I haven't been eating properly I blink to get rid of the dots you get form laying down too long, and reach for the bread at the bedside table. 

I couldn't smile, not yet, I felt I didn't deserve it. I was a fool to think Gaara would ever come to me, it was obvious I'd have to find him, it was from the beginning, yet I didn't see it when a slim change came by. 

**Friday – 26/4/18 **

Today when Naruto came in, I was already sitting up, I knew I couldn't manage much more today. Sasuke inclined his head and half-smiled, I nodded back when Naruto wasn't looking. 

**Saturday – 27/4/18 **

I'm back in my dorm, Naruto has volunteered to look after me. I do basically nothing, stare at walls, hope for the best… 

**Monday - 29/4/18 **

"…Why am I alive?" I asked croakily when Naruto came in to give me soup. He looked startled, and then smiled brightly, then his face fell at my question, I wanted to elaborate and say I wasn't suicidal, I just wanted to know why I hadn't died if I fell in water and didn't breath at the same time, but couldn't. 

"Remember how the pool was leaking, and somebody had to check regularly?" I nod, and he continues. "Well, it was Sasuke's turn, he said he passed Temari in the halls, and then when he reached the pool, he saw you fall in, and something must have clicked, because he immediately knew you weren't just going for a swim…" Naruto said, putting the tray on the bedside table. I listened intently. "He dived in, and saved you, taking you straight to the school hospital." 

"Oh." Was all I couldn't manage, then ate a bit of soup and rolled over to stare at the wall some more. 

**Wednesday – 2/5/18**

Naruto had brought in all my birthday presents, today he put them on my lap and told me to unwrap them before he does. 

I pulled the bow on the first one half-heartedly, it unlaces and I take the stickytape off the green wrapping paper. "This one is from Kakashi and Iruka." Naruto told me, and took the card and read it aloud. 

" 'Have a wonderful birthday, learn something useful, get out of bed early for once and consider studying, from, Kakashi Iruka.'" A small grin twitches at my lips. 

Inside was a book on people who keep too many secrets, at this, had I been myself, I would have laughed out loud, but instead I smiled, Naruto was encouraged. 

He got the next one, put the present on my lap, and read the card. "Sora, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL! 19!! WOOOOOOOOOOO! YAYY!! Enclosed are balloons, we even blew them up for you! They may be small, but it's the thought that counts. Thanks lots for being an awesome friend love, Sakura." Another piece of paper fell out of the card, and Naruto picked it up and read. "Sorry, Sakura wouldn't let me 'taint' her card with my writing, so I had to get a new piece of paper. Happy Birthday, Sorano, hope you have a great 19th, sorry we can't be there, sure you'll see us soon, I tried to stop Sakura from blowing up those balloons, but she insisted that we did since it was rude to make the birthday girl blow up her own balloons. The package wouldn't fit so she just made them really small." 

I smile again, where I would have laughed, and undid the present, it was a 'Sora Survival Kit' weird, seems they knew it'd happen and it arrived on the right day, enclosed was several really tiny shrivelled balloons, about a year's supply of chocolate, matches, small amounts of flammable things, and small toy cars with people who seemed to resemble her, Shika, Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi and Iruka. Naruto laughed at this and picked one up and dropped it quickly. "Er, they seem to be… edible." He said, trying not to grin, he knew they were crazy voodoo dolls to burn, set on fire, engulf in flames, char, slightly melt, put under immense heat, surround with fire and possibly eat. 

I had presents from other people too, strangely, one of Kiba's old friends had sent some kind of card made of old cardboard, and it made me worry about how dero he really was. Sasuke had bought me a pair of shoes, heels, I knew he was thinking of the fact I'd given my cool boots to Sakura. And he owed me like a billion pairs of shoes for all the crap I do for him. 

And Naruto, he had given me his separately and I nearly cried then, after going two days of silence I nearly cried. 

It was a long silver chain, on the end was a loop of silver that ran loose around the chain with a kind of grey-silver stone in the middle. "It was my mum's." he explains. "It's really old, so the diamond is kind of dark, but I hoped you'd still like it." he looked so hopeful, and I wished so much I had the energy and enthusiasm to cry and yell about how nice he was, instead I just hugged him. He got the message. 

"Thanks." I got out, and he put it on the bedside table. He sighed. "I gotta go, Biology next and I can't miss it, sure you'll be okay." 

I nod, and he goes, and now I'm here, staring at the wall, feeling amazingly tired from sleepless nights. 

**Friday 4/4/18 **

I slept. I feel terrible and I really shouldn't have, but Naruto was happy. Of course I dreamt he was here, and I dreamt everything was happy, and I imagined that he still came over and laughed at me being insane and I always reach the part where he kisses me, and then I wake up, my heart still light and bubbly, and my face still smiling then I shatter again and I curl up and stare at the walls until I go numb again. I guess when you have an infected cut you need to flush out all the bad bacteria before it'll heal. How I do that, I don't know. But I have to find out somehow. 

**HELLOOOO! Thanks HEAPS for the heap of reviews I got! Seriously, if you reviewed, my eternal gratitude is yours. For life. Spend it on what you want. Hehe. Anyhoo, hope you liked it! The least I can do is write a good chappie in return for all you guys do. THANKS HEAPPPSSSSS!! Lurrve you, **

** Looove, to-love-is-to-lie**


	25. Freedom

**Chapter Twenty-Five: **

_There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past. - __George Carlin_

**Sunday 6/4/18 **

The nurse visited again and said I looked better in my own room, she didn't really think so, I can tell, she just wanted me to stay here and not in her care.

**1:23pm **

Sasuke came in and took 'Sora-Watch' while Naruto studied. They seem to talk now. My mind sat there and urged me to ask, to speak, but I was too busy trying to get rid of the headache I had from lack of sleep.

**Monday 7/4/18 **

I'm missing so much school, I'll fail soon… I don't care, if I fail I can go find Gaara…

**Tuesday 8/4/18**

Sasuke was back again today, and this time I asked. "Why are you and Naruto speaking again?" I asked blandly when he entered the room.

He raised an eyebrow. "Wow, it talks." I give him an 'I really don't care' look, and motion for him to continue. "Because of you, I was worried too, you fell into a pool for a long while, I wasn't exactly quick about saving you since I couldn't figure out why you'd fall in a pool and not come out again."

I nod. "And?"

"And so Naruto and I started talking again."

"And?"

"'And' what? Isn't that it?"

"No, _And_." I didn't ask this time, he knew what I meant.

He sighs. "I don't know, he wants me to go back to Konoha, Sora, _with_ you." he fixes his gaze on mine. "He has plans that don't exactly run along the same lines as ours, and here we have a choice, to follow what we have in mind, or give him what he wants."

I understood what he was saying. "You've had your freedom, _two whole_ years' worth, go home." I tell him. "Itachi is long gone."

Sasuke's fist clenched and he goes deadly quiet for a moment. "I… I don't know what you mean; I'm here for a good education."

"Yeah, aren't we all?" I look at him and smile wryly.

He returns it and sits on the edge of my bed. "If I go back, I'll never leave again. That's why I can't return."

"I would say the same. Until I let go, I can't return. And who knows when I will." I say sadly. He nods.

"Your awful talkative today, poor Naruto has been longing to hear you talk and you save it all for when I'm on Sora-Watch."

"So I don't slit my wrists?" I ask.

"Yeah, but it's not like we _ever_ trusted you with knives." He grins, and lies back across the bed, I shuffle over and he lies next to me. "It feels like home." He says.

"I know." I add quietly, and we stay like that, appreciating the fact that there is some common cause we're both fighting for, and a common cause we're not willing to give up on, the people we love.

**Wednesday 9/4/18 **

I got out of bed today. My food was on the table next to the door, and I couldn't stand smelling it and not tasting it any longer, so I got up, I felt weak. Really weak, and scared, as if the world was suddenly twice as big as it was before. Maybe I've shrunk. I opened the window too, the sunlight was really nice, like warmth after so much cold.

**Saturday 12/4/18 **

Kimimaro came in today, with a box of chocolate and a lovely pile of work from English. "I brought you work to keep you from getting too bored." He grinned.

I took it and glared. "Thanks for the lovely birthday present. Schoolwork."

"That's what the chocolates where for." He grinned and put them on my bedside table. "It's mainly poetry and metaphor work, word dissections too."

I groan. "Damn. They always use violent words to make English sound exiting then let you down when they hand you another copy of '_tiger, tiger burning bright_…'"

**Sunday 13/4/18 **

I slept again. I feel better, but sadder. I dreamt He'd been there, and he said "Follow me," and on the other side Naruto was there, and he said "I need you." and instead of choosing, I'd stood still and lost both.

**Monday 5/4/18 **

I got Naruto to get more work; English was actually quite refreshing to do. It took my mind off a lot, since I had a lot to do. I've missed heaps.

**Tuesday 6/4/18 **

More work. I have about a TONNE of math. Sasuke comes in, I like talking to him. I think he likes talking to me; because we can talk knowing the other won't throw a spaz or tell anybody in the entire world, unlike Naruto, who would report us to a psychiatrist.

**Thursday 8/4/18 **

"Naruto has another Biology test coming up, he told me to make sure you haven't slit your wrists." Sasuke said blandly as he entered the room.

He handed me a wrap (Mmmm. Chicken) and sat on the end of the bed. "So, how is he?" I ask through a mouthful of wrap.

"He's good, a bit nervous, but I guess he's always like that, you worry him twice as much as he worries about me, you know."

"Why?" I frown.

"Because I won't leave here, he knows that, but you will, and frankly, he doesn't mind where we are as long as we're all together, and I'm tied here, but you aren't, in fact, your more then just not tied down, you want to leave as soon as possible, _that_ is what makes him nervous."

"He knows I have to leave sometime." I say quietly. "He _always_ knew."

Sasuke had a tender moment, and put his hand on my shoulder. "I know," he said quietly. "He won't take it well, if you even do."

"What do you mean?"

"Leaving is just as hard, if not harder, then staying, Sora."

I shake my head. "No, being the one to watch somebody you love walk away is the harder, it kills."

Sasuke shook his head. "Just wait, walking away and knowing that the person watching feels that makes it twice as bad."

I snort. "No, and plus, you and him have made up, I know that since he visits you more then me now." I glare, Sasuke grins.

As realization hit, it was weird, I could leave soon, just until he settled in, I could leave…. Sasuke saw it, he was perceptive, and he knew what was going through my head. Sasuke and Naruto were friends now, well, more then friends, again, and that meant my job was practically done; all I needed to do was make a believable 'slow' recovery, and then go! I was free, I could leave… It was a scary, wonderful feeling, thrilling. Suddenly I could take control and find Gaara, not sit here and try to bribe chance in brining him to me, then falling hard when it refuses.

"Sora, don't move too quickly, once you do, you'll lose your chance, plan this." he said. "It's too important to screw up."

I nod dumbly. "I know… but, it's weird… I feel like I have an obligation still, but I don't, we found Sasuke… and Naruto has given up on going home… I have nothing left here that ties me…"

"Just be careful."

"You'll make sure he's okay, right?"

Sasuke smiled. "Yeah, I promise."

**Friday 9/4/18 **

It's weird, being free to leave. Suddenly I'm scared. I have no clue in which direction to travel. Where the hell IS Suna? What train do I catch? Erg. I need to go to the library sometime.

**7:14**

Not now, though, later. When I am '_better_'.

**Sunday 11/4/18 – Naruto AND Sasuke came today. **

Both of them. I usually see Naruto most days, and Sasuke occasionally, and on the days when Naruto can't make it in Kimimaro comes and gives me my work.

But both came. It's a good sign, if you ask me. Tayuya is insanely jealous that he cares enough to come visit me all the time.

After they left, Kimimaro came in too. "Haven't seen you for a while." I said, smiling in my now usual not-really-there smile.

And for the first time, I notice the fact that his smile is exactly the same, and my heart goes out to him, who is he waiting on? "Sorry, I couldn't get in." he apologized.

I smile, putting more effort in it in a hope to cheer him up too. "Sit down, and tell me what kind of torture you brought today."

"English, and I got your Human Mind for you as well as Art." He smiled at me, and I smiled back, and I don't know why, but for the first time in almost a month it seemed a touch realer then all the other fake ones.

"Art? Since when do we get work for that?" I asked, frowning.

"Don't know. I don't take art." He smiled. "You should ask that Uchiha kid who comes in so often, hmmm… wasn't it just a few weeks ago you claimed you didn't know him?" he asked, eyebrow raised.

I shake my head. "I don't know, I think I'm just loved by hot randoms." I sigh. "Oh, the cruelty of the world."

He laughs, déjà vu again, and my stomach exploded in butterflies and I grimaced. I know where I'd heard laughter like that. "Sure, but I'm used to you having secrets. I used to think you had none, you know." He notices my pale face from his laughing and stops smiling. "You okay?"

"Yeah… And no, _I _don't have secrets, none of my own anyway. _You_ just don't ask the right questions." I grin half-heartedly again.

He seems relieved I'm okay, and smiles back. "Really, I don't ask the right questions, do I?"

I shake my head. "Course you don't."

"Okay then, where did you live before this?"

"Konoha."

"Did you like it?"

"Loved it, up to a point."

"Who were your friends?"

"Naruto, who's my cousin, two other boys, and Hanuro Sakura." I smile, hoping he wouldn't notice I was happy to give the full name of one but not the others.

He noticed. "Two boys?"

"Weird for a girl, I know."

"No, I mean who wer-?"

"_You_ ask too many questions! It's my turn!"

"Where did you live before here?"

"Nowhere."

"What?"

"Nowhere. I didn't have a home; Orochimaru-Sensei found me and took me here."

"Oh… I'm sorry…"

"No, don't worry, I think you have a longer and worse story then mine anyway."

I half-smile. "I'd hope so, seeing as yours must be scarring if it was worse."

He smiled back, and our eyes locked, and there was just this pure understanding that went in-between, and déjà vu hit again, but this time it was dizzying, and for a moment I saw Gaara where he was. And instinctively moved foreword, then he said "Sora, you okay there?" and I snapped back, he was Kimimaro again, and I shook myself.

Weird… I smile. "Yeah… I'm fine…"

**HELLOOOOO!! WHHHAATTSSSSUPPPP!! How you all doing? Good? Now, I may have to ask another favour, do any of you know any good stories? Pleaassee. Recommend them!! I am SO bored occasionally. (actually, not really occasionally, more like …erm… always?) hehe, anyhoo, recommend stories, even if their your own, I don't mind! I review lots…. If that makes anything better… hehe. **

**Anyhooo, LUURRVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE YOU! Review puh-leaasee! Love, to-love-is-to-lie. **

**P.S. I LOVE YOU!! **

**P.P.S. Don't let me die of boredom. Recommend story (maybe even what it's about if you feel extra energetic in the typing-department). **


	26. Start: Holidays

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**Chapter Twenty-Six: **

_I know a lot about cars. I can look at a car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming. - __Mitch Hedberg_

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**Monday 12/5/18 **

'_Sora! I didn't hear back vis a vis your birthday! WRITE BACK! Seriously. God. Usually I get a four-page essay about what has happened in your day. Why not this time? Write back! NOOOWWW!!_

_Love, Sakura.' _

'_To Sora, _

_You didn't write back, is everything okay? I hope so. I hope you were just too busy with your highly social school life, I'll contact your receptionist next time. Hope your, well, things are more then good here… I have serious plans for the future for once. I'll see you soon, love Shika.' _

Of course Shika saw more then Sakura. But I had to write back. And make it sound convincing… but what to say? I'd told them before all my tests were over.

'_To Shika + Sakura,_

_SORRY LOT'S! I know this may sound like I am insane and impossible, but I forgot. Heh… heh… you see I've been busy, guess who I found!? Temari! We've just been, er, catching up and the lot. _

_Things are good here! Sasuke and Naruto are 'friends' again. He visits Sasuke more then me nowadays. But Kimimaro visits lots to make up for it though, since I've been ditched. Has Naruto written? Shoot him, he didn't remind me to. See you soon? Are you two visiting or something? I LOVED THE BDAY PRESSIE! THANKS SO MUCH!_

_Lotsa Loooooooove, (say hi to Kakashi + Iruka + everyone for me),_

_Sora._

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**Tuesday 13/5/18**

I gave Naruto the letter to post today, he was glad I was writing to them and I decided it was about time I left my room. "Naruto, I'm coming too." I say, getting up. "Just let me get changed."

He was even happier at this. and almost dived out of the room so I'd change faster, when I came out he was beaming. I grin back. "Stop looking so happy, you'll hurt somebody with a smile like that."

He laughed and we went down the corridor to the mail box. "What made you wanna come outside all of a sudden?" he asked.

"I missed the sunlight, and I thought it's time to drag myself outa here." I say automatically, the go pale. "Here being my, er, my room, of course." I quickly lie, no it's wasn't really a lie… it was just, an… explanation… really.

"Good. I was missing you." he said, and hugged me, the love butterflies were suddenly pushed aside in my stomach when the wasp nest of guilt came in. it stung, and I swallowed hard to resist that bloated heavy feeling you get when you feel guilty.

We went and found Sasuke in his dorm; it was the first time I'd seen his dorm room, and wow, guess what? It had the same freaking arrangement as all the other boys' dorms! THESE PEOPLE NEED IMAGINATION!

I sat down on the couch and saw myself in the mirror on the wall on top of the TV that's in every dorm room here for some kind of attempt at decoration. I was pale, really pale; I'd been out for about twice as long as last time. Because last time I had to take care of Naruto too… weird, it's like the only thing that pulls me out of my depressions is somebody else's need of me.

I was weak too; I hadn't been eating amazingly well when I did eat at all so of course I had some muscle to build up again vis-à-vis vent crawling. And large bags under my eyes showed my lack of sleep, I wondered how long it had taken for them to realize I'd been faking all those naps in the day, well, it only took Sasuke a few minutes.

Sasuke shares his room with a random with brown hair and the spider-man, Kidomaru; he has a giant empty fish tank with a huge hairy spider in it.

We stayed there for an hour until I was getting scared of open spaces and decided to make my way back to my dorm. He was no. 27 in boys half. 6 up from Naruto, I can vent there sometime.

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**Wednesday 14/5/18 **

It's the holidays next week anyway, I will call this my use of out-of-school break time and come back next term.

I told Naruto, he's glad, Sasuke just told me it was about time, and Kimimaro smiled. His was the best reaction, it was like he was too glad to speak really, it showed in his eyes, for once. Because I know something has to be nice and strong for it to get to Kimimaro's eyes.

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Thursday 15/5/18 **

Vented to Naruto's again, it was good to be back in that small dusty uncomfortable space. Naruto wasn't there, but I sat with Kimimaro for ages. I had another episode. He laughed again and I saw Gaara, and I reached out to touch his cheek, then he waved his hand in front of my dazed face and I snapped back. "Oh! Anyway, as I was saying…" and I continued with whatever I was saying before… not like it mattered then, but I need to get out, I'm becoming delirious.

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**Friday 16/5/18 **

Going to the library, gonna find train times on the internet and do some organisation.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:32**

I feel weird. I feel as if I'm walking into the dark, and I have the choice now to take a light but have refused. Why? Because I want to forget, once I leave, do I really have plans on returning?

I walked into the library, ashen faced, I know everyone thought it was just due to my depression (of course the whole school knew, Temari was involved) but it was really because I knew once I had the stuff, the information, I had no excuse not to leave. Why not on Monday? Why not tomorrow? Why not now?

I printed off times, train fares, a map of Suna and the land-of-wind in general, and then slung my bag over my shoulder and headed back to my room, Naruto was waiting.

"WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU!? YOU SCARED THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF ME!" He yelled insanely.

I laugh. "I just went to the library, for English work. I had to look up Shakespeare or something along those lines."

He calms down a bit. "Never EVER leave again! I nearly had a heart attack!"

I grin. "That's great, now I walked a whole 500m today, I need a nap to work off all that extra muscle I've gained."

He signed, muttered something under his breath and then wandered out. As soon as he left my smile fell. If he was this stressed now, what would he be like after 3 days of knowing I'm gone? I sat down on the bed hard to think. Maybe I should wait a bit longer, just so he was more comfortable with Sasuke and that. Spend more time with Kimimaro, slowly spend less time with Naruto… so he's more ready.

Yeah, I'll do that, and with that I stuffed my maps and train timetable into the draw on the bedside table and threw on a clean shirt to go visit Kimimaro in.

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**Sunday 18/5/18 **

I haven't heard from Shika + Sakura for a while, the place is emptying with holidayers. It's nice, it feels like when we first came, except with Sasuke… I spend lots of time with him, more then I do with Naruto, I love Sasuke. I really do, he understands so much.

Kimimaro is my next visitee. And I see Naruto there too, I'm just hoping he won't notice the fact I see him less and less. I just need to stay here for a while longer to make sure he's okay, is all. Then I'll leave.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Monday 19/5/18**

There are like only 45 students left in the Uni part of things. Most of them are the ones who failed there tests and needed to do extra-credit and redo them.

Naruto took a bad hit and just (by two marks) failed his English. He has to do twice as much study now and practically has a mental breakdown if you say the word 'test'.

And since Naruto insists he spend study time alone as to avoid distractions, I find myself with Sasuke and Kimimaro mostly, like today, we were all in his (Kimimaro/Naruto's) lounge room because Naruto was in his room being a study-freak.

"I'm sooo borred. Nothing interesting is happening damnit!" I say, scowling.

Sasuke grins. "That's what you always say, and yet in about 2 weeks you'll have done more and dealt with more the most do in their life."

Kimimaro had grown used to Sasuke being over, and that we all talk as if we'd known each other since birth. He doesn't ask questions, he just accepts. That's what I love about him. "You crawled through a vent to get here, and your still bored?" he said, raising his eyebrows.

I shrug. "The fun of it wears off after the second injury." I smile and Sasuke laughs.

"Good, I still have one more injury to give before you get bored with me too." he grins.

I laugh too, then smile. "Nah, that black eye was good enough for that broken rib. I'll call it even. More people stared at you then they did at me." I grin. "Not to mention your gained 'bad boy' status."

Sasuke glared. Kimimaro half-smiled in his half-smiling way. "Broken rib?"

"Don't ask." Sasuke and I say in unison, still glaring at one-another. Ok, maybe Kimimaro _does_ ask occasionally. But only occasionally. And that's still about a million times better then me, if I were him I would be exploding from not knowing-ness.

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**Hello all! SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN ABOUT LIKE 2398472389MILLIOONN YEARS!! I had friends and stuff over and many insane adventures (I ran into a pole while checking out a hot guy and some crazy old man laughed at me…. Heh) anyway! Hope you liked it! I WILL KEEP UPDATING better again! **

**FFOORRGIIVEE MEEE!! **

**Lurve you! looooveee LOOOOOVVEE loooveee LOOOVEEEE to-love-IS NOT IN THIS CASE- to-lie.**

**P.s. I have come across a minor error, in the last chaptor I have written xx/4/yy in the date (not the xx or yy, just the four) and it is actually april, so if you are super-smart and actually noticed, FOORRGGIIVEE MEEE!! **

**p.p.s. refreshing the disclaimer: DISCLAIMERS ARE BORING! And I possibly don't own Naruto. Possibly don't own Sora either, for all I know she could be real somewhere and getting ready to sue because I've been writing about her. DUNDUNDUN! **


	27. The Invitation

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**Chapter Twenty-Seven: **

_Happiness makes up in Height for what it lacks in Length – Robert Frost _

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**8:28 **

Lalalala. Very bored. Hmmm. Sasuke's dorm is like six down from Naruto's, right? Well, let's see if I can visit…

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**12:28**

Awesome, he has the vent-room, so I could just practically drop out of the vent and land on him yelling "SSSAASSUKKEEEE! WILL YOU SIGN MY ARM!? NO! CAN I HAVE A LOCK OF YOUR HAIR! PLEAASSE? I LOVE YOU! I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN!"

And of course, I expected him to reach and get out his 'fangirl-away' spray and suffocate me with bad deodorant or something, but then he realized it was me and just tackled me and smothered my face with a pillow. "Sora-you-id-i-ot!" he said, taking extra time in-between syllables to shove my face into the bed. "YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH! I THOUGHT THEY'D FOUND THEIR WAY INTO MY ROOM!"

I was nearly dying of laughter and collapsed off the bed to start crying from laughing too much. He glared so insanely, and then I got a good look of his baby-blue boxers and white singlet, and had to laugh harder. Eventually I calmed down, started laughing again, calmed again, and then finally stopped laughing so I could say "I got bored."

He threw his pillow at me and I started laughing again. "Remind me why I still talk to you." he glared.

"Because you luurve me." I grin and prop my head on his bed. He sat on it across from me and I smile brightly. "Ah, good times."

He didn't stop scowling. "So why you here?"

"I got bored, I told you."

"Is that all?"

"Well, no."

"….?"

"YOU HAVE BABY-BLUE BOXERS! HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA!"

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Tuesday 19/5/18 **

HAHAHAHHAHAHA. Naruto got checked out by the new science sensei! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA! Me and him went to hand in his extra-credit assignment and he opened the door and, well, if I was a guy I'd call her hot, but only because she had possibly the biggest boobs ever, long ebony hair and icy blue eyes with long naturally black eyelashes. Anyway, of course _Naruto _didn't notice and was all "Hey, is Kynshi-Sensei here?"

And she FULLY looked him up and down, smiled and said she'd get him. I was all 'OHMYGOD DID SHE JUST CHECK OUT MY NARUTO!? PISS OFF BITCH!' and Naruto waved his hand in front of my face. "Hey, Sora, you seem angry, what the hell just got into you?"

I glare. "Nothing… just as long as you don't get into her I'm fine."

He looked confused, then shook his head and waited for his science-sensei to come out. He handed in his assignment and we headed back to the dorm for cookies and food.

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**Oh my god. OH MY GOD. 20/5/18 - Wedders. **

OH MY GOD!! OOHHH MYYY GOODDD! YOU'LL NEVER GUESS! EVERRR!! I GOT A LETTER FROM SAKURA AND SHIKA!

'_Hey Sora! Glad you wrote back, hey, we'll see you soon, right? So I won't write a long letter, inclosed is an invite! Read it, I expect you there. Phone me, please, number is on the invite, just use the school phone or something. _

_Hello, we're getting married! (Us being Shika + Sakura) Please come? Details are inclosed, we REALLY want to see you there. _

_Date: Friday 29/5/18 _

And to tell the truth, I really didn't read past there, I just dropped the letter and one line form a previous letter came to mind immediately.

'_I have serious plans for the future for once. I'll see you soon, love Shika.'_

OOHHMYYGOODD! I was SOOO stupid! Why didn't I look into that? Ok, because I was chroinically depressed, but STILl! Oohhmmyycoodd! Hahaha. Cod. AHH! I'm DELERIOUS! But MARRIGE?! Their 19!

Wow. Love. But still! SQQUUEEEE!! I'M SO EXITED! NEED TO SEE NARUTO!! NOOOWWW!

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**12:14pm **

Naruto got a letter too, and he actually read his too, but never the less, I took mine, tackled him and shoved it in his face yelling 'LOOKKK!! OOHMYYGOODD!!'

He read mine too, just to humour me because he knew I'd never shut up. "I know! Isn't it great?" he smiled. I glared.

"Be more exited damnit!"

"I get to be best man!" he said smiling brightly. I gape.

"Why aren't I that?!"

He looked at me as if I was dumb. "Because as much as you wish you were, your not a man." He said flatly. I glare.

"Hey! You always say you can be anything you want!"

"Yes, yes. You go and reach that dream of being best man." He sighed. "Read the WHOLE of yours, like I did. You might like it."

And so I did, AND I'M MAID OF HONOUR! I nearly had a heart attack and ran around singing "Sakura's getting marrriiieeddd! I'M A MAID OFF HOONOOURR! She loves me more then YOU! because I'm HONOUR-AABLLEE and your just a MMAANN!" Naruto laughed because I must have looked very insane when the man-with-(now FULLY) eight-chins walked in to see me dancing with the broom and dustpan on the couch.

BUT YYYAYYY! WEDDING!!

So Naruto and I ventured off to find the school phone and to ring her straight away to say we'd be there whenever she wanted us there. Naruto and wrestled over who'd talk until he stole my lunch and put it on top of a TALL locker and made me jump insanely to get it, so I let him talk.

"Hello? It's Naruto."

(Insane squeaky noise you get when you hear people talk on the phone)

"Yeah! I got the letter."

(Bit of a louder insane squeaky noise)

"Yeah, we'll be coming! Sora is practically going… er, more insane because of the wait."

(Squeaky noise)

"Yep."

(Squeaky noise)

"Yeah."

(Squeak, squeak, squeak)

"Mhm."

"Man I hate this." I grumble. "Squeaky things should be shot."

(Squeak, squeaky squeakers)

Suddenly there was a REALLY insane SCREECHY noise and Naruto practically dropped the phone, we both look scared and don't want to touch it, then grin and sign. "Sakura." We both say. Then he picks up the phone again, and drops it almost in the same movement.

"Sakura." We both say again.

This time I pick up the phone and scream "INO LOST HER VIRGINITY TO ONE OF THOSE GIFT IRIS PLANTS IN HER STORE!"

This time everything went quiet. I grin. "See? You just gotta know what to say to her." Naruto laughed.

"Sakura! It's Sora!"

"SSOORRRAA!!"

"SSAAKKUURRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" I yell back, some randoms look at me strangely.

"SSSOOORRAAAA!!"

"SSSAAKUUURRAAAA!"

More randoms give me dirty looks for yelling in the halls.

"SOOORRAAAA!!"

"SSAAKUU-" I stop as Naruto hit's me with a book.

"Shh!" he scowls at me. I glare.

"Fine." I grumble. "Sorry, Naruto is being boring and won't let me disrupt classes."

Sakura laughed. "I have dresses here! come on Wednesday so we can try them on and catch up! You leave Saturday!"

"Deal!"

Naruto reached for the phone. Sakura continued. "Oh! And guess what!"

"Tell me when I'm there! Naruto wants the phone back!" I say as he grabs it.

We stay there for a while and get details before heading back to be exited together. suddenly a thought hit's me. "Sasuke?" I ask.

Naruto looks at me sadly. "You know he won't."

I sigh. "It was just wistful thinking, I guess."

Naruto half-grins. "Yeah, from both of us."

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**Hellooo!! I'm going off to Melbourrnnee this week!! So I'll be aways for a few daysss. Don't panic! Will update ASAP when I get back!! LOVEE YOU ALLL SOO MUUCHH!! Oh, and for the gally who wanted to know the no. of pages in my stories: **

**SecretKeeper: 167 **

**SecondGuess: 104 **

**Firefly: Is 145 long, but I've only published about 60… heh… **

**The Second Sensei: 72 **

**Hope that's what you wanted! THANKS HEAPS FOR REVEIWINGGG!! THANKS SO MUUCHHH!! Have a great holz! (for those in Oz. for those not in Oz. HAHAHAHAH!! Have fun at SCHOOL!!... Unless your holidaying too. in which case, WOOO!) **

**LOOOVEE to-love-is-to-lie**


	28. Exitement

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**Chapter Twenty-Eight: **

_Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face. -Dave Barry_

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**3:02**

OhhhMmyyyyGooosshh!! SO EXITED!! DAMNIT!! I CAN'T WAIT A WHOLE SEVEN DAYS TO GO HOME!

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**3:23**

Oh god. I said home. Home. That's not gooood. Not goood, what if I can't leave again? I can't go back!

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**3:33**

But I can't exactly not go to SAKURA'S WEDDING! WEDDING!

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**3:40**

Oh god. What if I get stuck? What if I fall in mental quicksand and I can't get out? What if I drown because I turn into Sasuke, the tide will be rising, but this time I won't have a Naruto and Sora to drag me out, seeing as I'm the one that's actually stuck.

Sasuke knows when something is too hard for him to achieve or beat, that's why he isn't coming, but I was never a good one when it came to knowing my limitations, and now I really have to think, glass half full, or half empty? Stay or go? Risk, or no risk? Be there for my best friends wedding, being maid of honour, see Sakura's most memorable day, or run. Leave when Naruto is gone and pretend nothing ever happened while I go and find Gaara…

I know which one I should do, but the questions remains: which one **CAN** I do?

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**21/5/18 – Thurs **

The wasp nest of guilt has officially made my stomach it's home, sometimes they fly up and sting my throat and chest too, but most of the time they just sit in my stomach and remind me of the decision I need to make.

Naruto keeps telling me how good it'll be to see home again, to see everyone again, to sleep in his own bed again.

Then I remind him a) this'll be our home for a while until Sasuke remembers where he really should be, b) I doubt we'll see 'everyone' seeing as 'everyone' has gone different places, just like we have and c) he doesn't have his own bed seeing as we sold our flats and nearly everything we owned so we could pay the money for a dorm room here.

At this he'll usually pout and stalk out of the room muttering 'your such a killjoy sora.'

Strange, seeing how in the last few weeks of Sasuke being back we've switched roles, he's the happy-go-lucky one who has all the fun and sees the Brightside and I'm the insanely moody one. Maybe Naruto had his own choice to make too.

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**22/5/18 – Friday **

I have to go, it's not like I can't. It's her wedding. That was pretty obvious from the start, I have just been so selfish lately, I've forgotten that right from the beginning I didn't belong to me, I belonged to everyone that ever needed me. I guess I'm just never my own self. I don't know if its god's way of a cruel joke or it's just how I work. Which is really the same thing isn't it?

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**24/5/18 – Sunday **

I'm packed already, as nervous and worried as I am, I can't wait to be there, and that feeling of just pure excitement and longing is what makes me more worried. If I didn't care, I wouldn't care about being stuck there.

But I am nearly exploding with excitement and that just makes my reasonable self twice as worried. I really hate my reasonable self. I wish it would just bugger off.

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**25/5/18 – Moooooooonday **

More like MOOOOAAAANNNNday. I am SOOOO nervous. (And PUNny. Hahahahaha. I'm hilarious. You know, I should be a comedian. For all my hilarious vent jokes too.)

Two days. Ergg. I think I need to go see Sasuke or somebody.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**3:23**

Sasuke was out, so 'Somebody' had to do, I wandered over to Kimimaro's dorm. It's weird, because you can always tell who I'm gonna see by who's dorm I say it is… like, when I go and see Naruto it's Naruto's dorm, and when I see Kim, it's his dorm. Weird anyway!

So I went over and jumped on him insanely yelling "YOU BETTER MISS ME!"

"What!?" he looked frazzled by being creeped up on. I laugh.

"I'm going on holidayssss." I grin at the look of despair on his face. "Only for a few days, don't worry." I ruffle his hair.

He glares. "I'm not worried."

"Suuuuure." I grin, and move to the coffee machine. "God, why doesn't MY dorm have a coffee machine? We only have a stupid kettle." I grumble.

"Because Jirobo brought it."

I drop the cup. "HE BROUGHT IT!?"

"er, yes…"

"YUCKYUCKYUCK!! I'VE BEEN DRINKING OUT OF THIS!!"

"..yes, you have…"

"I'M GONNA GET FAT!!"

"Sora, you can't get fat from-"

"YESYOUCAN! AHHH!! I'M GONNA BE OBESE FOR SAKURA'S WEDDING! NOOOOOOO!!"

Kimimaro sighed. "Sora, LISTEN! You cannot catch obesity from drinking coffee made out of the same machine."

"What about arthritis?"

"No."

"Tuberculosis?"

"No."

"… Ringworm? Come on. Just tell me, I need to know! EARLY TREATMENT!"

"No!"

"Okay, no ringworm then, what about Chlamydia?"

"…No, Sora, you won't catch Chlamydia from Coffee Machines, did you even LISTEN in high school?"

"Pfft, no! Who did?" I laugh when he gives me a dry look. Then turn serious again. "What about Cervical cancer? If it doesn't come from _him_, where DOES it come from?"

"NO! It's FINE! And I really don't feel like going into where Cervical Cancer comes from."

"Fine, well, you drink some too. That way when you catch Chlamydia or arthritis I can say 'I told you so.'"

"The people at the hospital know me, but I doubt it's from that kind of bone degeneration." He said dryly.

"Suuure." I say, disregarding his comment.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**26/5/18 **

WOOOOOO!! I CAN'T WAIITTT!! AS ANNOYING AND WORRIED AS I AM I'M SOOOO EXITEDD!!

Gonna go ask Naruto what train we're on.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**4:09**

NOOOOO!! We have to wake up at FOUURRR IN THE MORNING!! NOOOO!! Erggg. Fine, it looks like it's a 6 o'clock bedtime for me. Noooo. I hate early nights; you can never get to sleep quickly.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**5:56**

It's still freaking daylight. How is one suppose to get some rest around here WHEN THE SUN IS STILL UP!?

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**6:17 **

…. No change. The BIRDS are still a-cheeping. I tried shutting my curtains. Nothing helps. I HAVE NO REASON TO LIIIVEEEEEEE.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

…**.**

Yes. You heard right. I have no reason to live because the sun is still up at 6:20.

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……

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

……………………………………………………………………………………………

…**. **

NOT EVEN WRITING LOT'S OF 'ZZZZ'S MAKES IT BETTER!! Grrrr!!

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**Hello all! Baccckkk from Holiday Land! How have you all been? Good I hope! Sorry for the wait, and no, I haven't finished this story, I just told you how many pages I've updated so far. So all, hope you liked this chapter! III LOOVEE YOOUUU FORRR REVVEIWWINGG!! I REALLY DOO!! LOTS AND LOTS!! **

**LOOOOVEEEEEEEEEEEE**** to-love-is-to-lie. **

**p.s. loved this quote, it's SOOOO true. If you haven't been skiing before, unless you are super co-ordinated this is basically what happens. Though in the funnest possible way. **


	29. Welcome Home

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**Chapter Twenty-Nine: **

There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered. - Nelson Mandela

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**27/5/18 **

It's 4:30 in the morning. I am on some form of public transport. And to top it off, I haven't eaten since 5:30 YESTERDAY. NOT HAPPY!

Naruto seems chirpy and happy as usual. Well, not usual, more like lately. Everything seems to be going his way, really. He's got me tied down for now, and Sasuke is still raping him daily. Really, what more could one want?

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**5:03am **

Brrrr. It's cold in these parts. Land-Of-_Fire_ my ass.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**5:07**

I'm actually quite tired, I may have a power nap…

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**9:45**

"…Sora! Sora you fat thing wake up!!"

"…Grrmmmmpphh…."

"And speak like a normal person."

"Nyyehh…"

"Go on. _English_."

"No. goes away. It's been like 15 mins. Let a girl sleep."

"No, you've been asleep for FOUR HOURS! Get up fatty!"

I sit up violently and my head swims. "Whoa, I should sit up slower…"

"We're gonna be there in 10!" Naruto says excitedly, not listening to my complaints.

I wake up as exhilaration runs through my body. "REALLY!?"

He nods. "Yup! Oh, and just so you know you drooled on some random in your sleep." He informs me.

I go pale. "Why the hell didn't you TELL me!?"

He laughs. "The looks on their face was priceless."

I glare, tackle him and shove his face into the seat. "Next." I press his face into the cushiny bit of the seat. "Time." I do it again. "STOP ME DROOLING ON STRANGERS!"

He shoves me off him and glares. "Well, _Soor-ryy_."

"Yeah, you'd think so!" I scowl at him insanely.

………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:44pm**

The day, it was just pure AWESOME. Nothing else. AWESOME.

We arrived, and I was tackled madly by a pink haired loon. Naruto and Shika shared a _man_ly embrace. Of course, Sakura doesn't work that way and just practically rapes me instead whilst screaming "SOOOORRAAAIIIIMISSEDYOUSOOOOMUCH!"

And once I was hugged madly, she ran off to do the same to Naruto and I grinned and hugged Shika. "You've gained weight…" I say.

He laughs. "Inspirational, haven't seen you all for three months and the first thing you say is 'you've gained weight.'" He turns sombre. "I may have to go throw up now, I am quite emotionally unstable." He grins.

"I'd imagine, especially if your about to marry _that_ thing." I jab my thumb in the direction of Sakura, who was instructing him that he must never wear that jacket with those shoes every again.

Shika laughed. "Glad your back." And hugged me again. I felt like I could cry, because everything that comes from Shika counts 10 times more. No offence to Sakura, it's just that when you hear something from Shika you know he means it.

We made our way to Shika's house, which was now quite pink and had pretty things everywhere from Sakura living there for the past couple of years. It's feels like they just met, and that this isn't serious, but then you remember they've been together more then 2 years and their getting married in a few days.

Shika's house was the same, pretty open still, with blue walls, kinda beachy for such an inland home, clean, but now with pictures of him and sakura on the walls. "Gosh, look at you two, like an old couple you are." I tease. Sakura takes this as a compliment and Shika glares.

On the fridge I find all my and Naruto's letters, and nearly start to cry again. "You KEEP them_ all_? I thought I was the only one who did that!"

Sakura laughs. "Yeah, I wouldn't throw out YOUR letters. Gosh, Naruto's on the other hand…"

"Hey!" He pouts.

She grins. "Joking, they're all there too."

We drag our bags up to our room, Naruto and I were sharing the damned thing and had to wrestle for beds. "I BAGS THIS ONE!" I call.

"NO! BACK OFF! IT'S MINE!"

"hahahha. FIGHT ME!"

Which, he complied. And by the time Shika came upstairs because all he could hear was mad swearing and loud noises he had me in a headlock and I was about to kick him as hard as I could in the _shins_ (because I'm not mean and just in case he actually MIGHT for some strange reason wanna have kids.), well, as hard as one can when one is in a headlock.

Shika laughed. "You two haven't changed a bit."

"SORA GET'S FIRST PICK, SHE WRITES LONGER LETTERS!" Comes the call from downstairs, Sakura obviously guessed what'd happened.

I poke my tongue out at Naruto, who pouts, glares and unwillingly throws his bag on the other bed, I grin triumphantly and unpack my few things on the other (much better, window side bed).

We get downstairs and Shika hands me a cup of coffee, I grin at him and say cheers.

"To what?" he asks.

"To being home." He say longingly, like I'm not really home at all. "Oh, and to marriage and the lot." He grins and clinks his cup to mine and we drink.

Sitting down on the couch, he drinks and sighs. "So you are glad to be back?"

"Of course, just scared."

"You'll be fine."

"Will I?" of course Shika would guess. I don't need to explain anything to him.

"You will. Your strong, you have an obligation to fill out back at Sound, you won't be stuck just yet, and I have a feeling, knowing you, Sora, you won't be stuck anywhere unless you want to be."

I snort. "Sure. I wish."

Shika nods. "You're too stubborn; nothing can keep you down when you have somewhere else to be. Or when somebody needs you."

I smile. "It's nice thinking. It is, but I doubt it."

"Sora, we tried, remember? Sakura and I did our all. We failed miserably; there was nothing we could do. Because Naruto needed you more and so you instinctively went to him."

"I guess." I say, letting him win, knowing that he'd never give up otherwise.

"Trust me on this. But what you should be worried about is when you need to take care _of yourself_, and _not_ somebody else. Sometimes you need to be a little selfish, Sora." He said sternly.

I look down. "I know, really, I do. And I have to be really, really generous now to prepare for it."

Sakura and Naruto came down the stairs laughing and chatting away. "We changed your bed for you, lazy thing." She said to me. I grin immediately, the mood changing. Shika smiles at me.

"We'll talk later, now, what do you want to do first?"

Firstly, I insist on running off to go find Kakashi and Iruka. Sakura says that's fine because she needs to call the dress people and pick up the dresses. So I instantly shove my shoes on and run jog off. I still know every bit of this town, I just drink in everything. Konoha, with every step I take I see something else that stirs memories, whether good or bad. I purposely take the route away from the school, fearing what kind of feelings it might provoke.

I know Kakashi and Iruka's house. I've visited a few times before to hand in late assignments when Kakashi has given me an extension to do them over the weekend.

The people seems to look at me as if they know me, but can't really work out from where, like an extra in a movie they saw a long while back, that suddenly is put in one of the leading roles.

On the way I see _my_ turn off, and my legs seem to want to run there, automatically. Even after a long while it seems as if this is routine. I've only been back a few hours and yet it seems like I've never been away. I turn away from the long badly tarred road to keep running. I know Naruto would have wanted to come too, but really, I didn't wait for him on purpose. I didn't know how I'd react to seeing all this again. And I didn't want him to be there if it ended up badly. But I was handling this fine; really, it's just every time I remind myself of leaving I feel sick. I know it'll hurt. And I'll only have a few days to recover since I need to go back to class this starting term. It was just pure luck I got through my tests before I went into a depression.

Running though Konoha, my mind screams stop! Stop! I want to stop and look and feel and breathe and live! Let me just look at this, and see this, and smell this one more time… but my body is quite determined to not let me get distracted and runs on, not breaking stride the whole way to Kakashi's house, even while my head is turned to see a small shop or pavement side I have memories on into the distance.

Arriving on the veranda, I knock on the door and wait. Knock again. Wait. Knock again. Wait. I hear footsteps. I knock again.

"Wait up, seriously! Give a guy some time!" I hear the annoyed familiar voice from inside call. I grin.

"Hurry up Lazy-Ass!" I call.

"…Sorano?" I hear the surprise in the voice. And the footsteps quicken as the door flings open, I smile and Kakashi smiles back, until I laugh and leap on him.

"I missed you!" I say, hugging him.

He hugs me back and laughs. "You too. Iruka is coming around soon. He'll be especially glad to see you."

He invites me in and I sit down. His house is still amazingly messy, one story with the lounge room connected to the kitchen. I cringe. "Damn, you need somebody in here to clean!"

Kakashi laughs. "I did once, though the poor girl went insane with having to clean over and over and over because I kept making things messy. She even tried making a garden once, failure, of course. I didn't water the flowers once as soon as she left."

I shake my head. "Tsk, tsk. Poor girl."

He laughs. "That's what Iruka said."

"How have you been?" I ask, making him sit down.

"Great, really, you don't know how much you've done for us down here. Even if you never really meant too. People are much more… er, _accommodating _to couples like Iruka and I."

"I should be a lawyer for Gay Rights." I grin at the disgruntled look on Kakashi's face at the fact I'd implied he was gay. "But I'm glad, even if most don't remember who that girl actually was, I'm glad that they remember what she did."

He smiles. "Well, they do. You seem to leave a mark on people everywhere, even if they don't really notice you."

"You know, besides Tsnuade, you were the only one who really remembered me. Oh, and Anko-Sensei, but she was creepy." I make a face, and Kakashi laughs.

"Yeah, not many people mess with her."

"Not many people messed with you either." I say, raising my eyebrows at him. "When you actually were bothered to be angry people listened mighty well, you know."

He shrugged. "Being angry always caused so much hassle. It was never really worth it."

I roll my eyes. "Nothing is ever worth _effort_ to you." I pause. "Well, except the walk down the road to the corner store for dirty magazines."

He laughs. "Iruka is still fighting about those."

I shake my head. "I admire the guy's tenacity but it's a losing battle."

Kakashi grins. "You try telling him that."

"Nah, I wanna see how long it takes till he gives up."

"Another month or so."

"No way! He'll be at it for years! Iruka doesn't give up that easy!"

Kakashi snorts. "Sure."

I groan. "If you've made him lazy I'll cry."

"No, it isn't that bad yet."

I sigh in relief. "Good."

Just then Iruka comes in, holding several boxes of paper and yelling "Damnit Kakashi! Get out here and help me! Seriously, you need the exercise!"

"You'll manage."

"Here, I'll help." I say, getting up. But it was no use, seeing that as soon as he heard my voice he dropped the boxes and the papers went everywhere.

His eyes were wide. "I know that voice." He looks up and I grin brightly at him. "Sorano?"

"You bet."

"We didn't expect you back here." he said quietly.

"I know, but I couldn't really pass up on a wedding. There would be free cake!"

Iruka laughed. "And you haven't changed a bit." And I hugged him.

After exchanging the usual 'you look great!' kinda greetings, I help pick up all the paper while Kakashi takes a swig from a bottle (most likely containing alcohol) and lazily changes the TV channels.

Iruka makes coffee and I go for my third cup today.

"I would offer whatever Kakashi's drinking, but it still doesn't seem right to offer alcohol to a student."

"Eh hem, close friend. Student days are long past." I say, almost sadly.

Iruka smiles and pats my back. "I know, but it's hard to forget. It's like you've never been gone."

"I know, down to the exact feeling." I say grimly, taking the offered Coffee cup.

We sit "So, tell me how you have been, what the news is?"

I grin, and launch into my long story of finding Sasuke, Kakashi pretends not to care and to watch TV, but I know he's listening, mainly by the way he covers a laugh to hear me crawling through vents and being scared of the man-with-8-chins.

"So they're together again?" Iruka says at the end, after hearing the whole thing, even the Temari incident. It's nice to let it out to somebody who hasn't a clue at all, I know Shika and Sakura know from Naruto, but it's just plain nicer confiding in people who have been kinda kept in the dark from the whole thing, and I love Kakashi and Iruka to bits, so there aren't many other people I'd tell this much too.

I nod. "Yep. He visits him more then me." I say rolling my eyes. "They grow up so fast." I say, wiping away and imaginary tear or two.

Iruka grins. "But, I don't get it, why aren't you all back then?"

"Because Sasuke has got Naruto under a spell. Completely hoodwinked."

"How?" This was Kakashi, finally admitting to have been listening by responding.

"Sasuke says that 'after all this hard work, why pass up such a good education?'" I imitate his voice. "And Naruto is head over heels for the boy, so naturally he believes every word. He'll be there for a while yet." I say.

"And you?" Kakashi asks, noticing the sadness in my voice.

"I don't know." I say, purposefully vague. "There are things I do want to do, but they might have to wait." I say, the pain striking in my stomach, as the lead weights of impatient longing settles in my stomach along with the wasp nest of guilt and the butterflies of excitement, which are awful painful for butterflies. You know, they way things are going my stomach is going to be very full. I may have to digest all this before my next good meal. And wasps aren't fun to digest. Especially when practically alive.

"You know, he loved you." Iruka says, knowing where my mind was. "You could see it. everyday."

"I know." I say quietly. "I was a fool."

Kakashi turns to see me. "I agree, for this one."

And you know, I grin, it was very refreshing to hear that, it's nicer then the usual 'oh, don't feel bad, it wasn't your fault, really it wasn't, you were perfect, I wouldn't have done any different.' I tell him that, and he laughs.

"You could have told me though." I say, glaring at them both.

"Like it would have made any difference, didn't Shika and Sakura tell you many times?"

I flush. "Shhh. And how do you all know this anyway?"

They look at each other "Art teachers." They say in unison.

I frown. "Wha?"

"You'd be surprised how much kid's say in art. The art teachers usually tell the rest of us what's going on in the student's lives." Iruka says.

"Seriously, students say so much in art, because it's such a nice environment. Really art teachers know about everything that's going on in the whole school, ever."

"Damn, we always trusted the quiet ol' art teachers."

"Tsnuade?" Kakashi asked. "Quiet?"

"Okay, okay, fine. But we still trusted them."

"Yeah, but teachers usually know a lot more then the kids think, we just like to humour you guys by being surprised when anything happens."

"God, you're all so cruel." I say dramatically.

"We know." Kakashi grins. "It's surprisingly fun."

I laugh. "So, what's happened here?"

"Tenten and Neji hooked up." Iruka said, I gape.

"Finally!" I say.

"Yeah, we know." he replies.

"And that insane little kid that used to follow Naruto around everywhere, the old Hokage's son, he's quite the wild one and keeps getting into trouble." Kakashi said.

"Reminds me of Naruto." Iruka laughed.

I smile. "Ah, the luxury of small-town gossip, how I've missed thee."

They smile and we chatter on about things and how everything is going and about the new kids and if any of them were as messed up as our year and if there was a little invisible kid who needed the timetable handed too her personally every year by an insane science teacher. Of course, there wasn't. It's only me who was that unfortunate.

Eventually, after another cup of coffee (bringing today's count up to 4 cups) Naruto found me, and tackled me and yelled at me madly for running off. "I CHECKED FUCKING EVERYWHERE!"

I shove him off me. "And you didn't think to check here? Loser." I say sighing.

"Am not!"

"Are too."

"Nup."

"Face it; love; only a loser would find watching an innocent stranger being drooled on entertaining."

Kakashi and Iruka muffle a laugh, I scowl. _Boys_.

Naruto grins. "Yep, _love_, and only a true loser would fall asleep and _be_ the one drooling on the innocent stranger."

"You could have stopped me!"

"What can I say? I'm a loser."

I glare insanely and go to make myself another cup of coffee. Not bothering to ask if anyone else wanted one and made one for everyone automatically.

So after, a good long chat, and a long promise I'd be back later to talk, Naruto and I jogged back into town. Sakura and Shika had left, Naruto had informed me while glaring, since he had waited until they left to be polite, of course, I didn't really care.

We got ice-cream at a shop and walked down the street. Naruto already complaining that his was melting.

"Gosh, stop whining. I swear…" I mutter.

"Stop being a whining Nazi!" he complained back.

I roll my eyes. "Fine, fine, fine, fine. What flavour you get?"

"Pistachio." He says proudly.

I stop. "Wait, _pistachio_?"

"Yep!" he nods.

"What the hell!? What kind of freak makes PISTACHIO as an ice-cream flavour!" I laugh at him.

"Well, I would…" he said, glaring. "It's genius."

"Pfft. I'd hate to be a genius then."

"Good thing your not." He sticks his tongue out at me and I grin to catch up as he starts walking again.

"Well, what'd you get?"

"Rainbow, like a normal person would!"

"…_You're_ _normal_?"

"Shut up."

"Anyway, as if rainbow is normal, seriously, _RAINBOW_! It probably has pistachio in it anyway; you see that ugly green colour there? Yuck. You know all that food dye can turn your shit blue? That'd be disgusting, but if it happens tell me so I can take a photo…" he continues on and I stop listening, I know this road. I know it well, how had we walked here?

"Shut up! And we've taken the wrong turn." Naruto looks up and stops his rainbow-pistachio war speech.

"No we haven't, look- oh…" he stops. "Oh."

"Come on," I say, tugging his sleeve. "Let's go. Sakura will be waiting. We spent ages at Kakashi's."

He nods dumbly. "Yeah… yeah… wait, what?"

"Let's go!" I say again sharply, pulling him along. "Hurry up." Naruto shrugs and launches back into his ice-cream speech, but I'm not listening. Of course we had ended up on this road, it's not like we'd really been paying lots of attention.

I shake myself, but the long straight badly tarred road fills me with longing. I want to go back. I have too. just for a quick look… no! no! NOOOOO!

I shake myself again. Naruto is still speaking. "…You know that bubblegum flavour? It's 'spose to be the BEST! Let's go back tomorrow and- Sora? Wakey, wakey! Are you even LISTENING!?"

"Yeah. Ice-cream." I say. "Go on."

He glares. "Don't lie. And that was just a good guess."

"I dunno, it's just being back here."

"Don't go back, Sor, it's not good for you."

I sigh. "I know."

"Promise you won't?"

"…why?" I say, trying to get out of it, god knows why, but I didn't want to promise.

"Because…I dunno, just do it." he looked at me pleadingly. "Please?"

I give in. "Okay, I promise."

"You know you shouldn't go back. The past is in the past." He said, feeling happy to have said something so action-hero like. I grin and pick up the pace.

"Come on, I think we can con Shika and Sakura to treating us dinner. Let's go check out that nice Thai place."

He grins and we walk back.

And so we got home, had a shower, and I collapsed on my bed and began writing. Now I have MAJOR writers cramp. Seriously, I need coffee. That'll bring my count up to 6… I should really stop, eh, oh well.

I shall write after dinner.

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**I decided you guys deserved an insanely long update. Well, not really insanely long. But a good 3 pages more then the usual updates. Anyhoo! How are you all? Good, I hope, I really liked writing this chapter, it was heaps of fun! I hope you LOOVE it tooooo. THANKSSOOOOMUCHFORREVEIWING!! THANKKK YOOUUU!!**

**Loooooooooooooove, to-looveee-is-to-lie. **

**p.s. thanks for the long reviews!! I LOOVEE YOOUU!! (yes, YOU.)**

**p.p.s there were a few quotes I really liked for this chapter, but this one really stood out. Hope you liked it!**


	30. Dresses

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**Chapter Thirty: **

_Almost Nobody Dances sober, unless they happen to be Insane – H.P. Lovecraft_

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**1:03am **

Hhahahahahahhahaha. I nevah noteicd howe murch fun a lampshade can bee. Do you sea ittt? I do. Wow. My rooofe is even better… HEY! IT'S NAROTU! Hahah. I'm munna shoew him my lampshade.

Hahhahahahahhaahahahahahhahahhahha. I should sweep. Narotu said shhooo. Sweeppyyysleepyyysweeppyy. Beddy biesss. LOOK! It's shikerr. He shays I shoulde shweeep. I showed him my lampeshape. He says it goes on lampes. Whooaaa….. hahahaaha…. Do yoh no there's a FIHSS… haha… I mean FISHHEE call'd lamprey? I do. I'm a intellecteee. Cozzaa Lampeshade is nearly Lamprey but diffrent.

Hhaahhahahaahaaaa…………….

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**26/5/18 - Thurs**

Sooooooo… Tiiiredddddddd… My only experience of being drunk since my going away party…. Errggg… forgot how crap you feel afterwards…. Errgg…. Did you SEE what I wrote before? My god. I don't even REMEMBER writing that.

They hosted a welcome back Dinner and EVERYONE was there: Lee, Neji, Tenten, Shino, Chouji, Ino Kakashi and Iruka. Neji seemed to have been forced to come, but nobody really WANTS to argue with Sakura, so I think he just came because he had nothing better to do.

Of course, Lee had a fit and tackled me and told me my face was youthful as ever and we should have a game of tennis sometime. I tried as hard as I could to politely decline, but he insisted to the point I have to enlist Sakura to tell him she had a busy schedule for me, for wedding preparation. Lee was so enthusiastic about the wedding, 'a CELEBRATION OF YOUTH AND LOVE!' he would call out happily.

Ino is happy, you can tell, she is still stunning and pretty as always, but the way her nails have soil under them and that her hair is slightly less shiny tells the world she is ready to live more and stress less about trivial things like nails and hair.

And Tenten, you should see the way she looks at Neji. I told myself firmly to stay out of it though, and just enjoyed the dinner and the feeling of being with the people I love. Of course, Lee couldn't help it… Nobody else wanted to say it, but they all stopped whatever they were doing and turned their heads to Naruto and I once it was asked. We couldn't get out of it now.

"So, Sora, Naruto, how is Sasuke?"

We both cringe, then decide it's best to just tell them. But now I see that Naruto and I see different points of view of the situation, and now I see that maybe his is a little mislead. Naruto smiled brightly. "We have great news on that!" he said, grinning.

"Really?" Ino said, tilting her blonde head.

I shoot a look at Naruto, knowing he isn't just pleasing the crowd. He means it. I let him continue, since this seems to be news to me too. "Yes…" I say slowly.

"We do!" Naruto confirms. "I think he'll be coming back soon! He visits our dorms now and we talk to him heaps, I think he's finishing these tests and then coming home!"

"Wow. You did it!" Sakura says happily.

"Thanks so much guys, we've missed him!"

"Cheers to you!"

And Lee lifted his glass of sake in joy. "TO SORA AND NARUTO, WHO ARE BRINGING OUR FRIEND BACK!"

"Hear hear!" they shout and we clink glasses before drinking down a good half of them in one go. Our food arrives and the chatter continues relentlessly. New rounds of Sake come too; I now start to realize maybe I did drink too much.

After the toast to our unachieved achievement, which I felt really guilty about, but couldn't say otherwise after Naruto had just bragged out details about what he looks like now and how he's doing and everything. He was so proud. What was Sasuke feeding him?

I know the real story… because the one Naruto's telling is bullshit. I know it. Shika catches my eye and I nod at his doubting look, the rest of them smile, even Neji and Shino who rarely smile anyway. Shika doesn't drink, he has a full glass still in front of him, and took one sip I think the whole time, maybe not even that. But he drove us home, which was good.

"So what are you up too?" I ask Ino, who was to my left.

She grins. "Florist. I love it, not just selling them now though; I actually work with the flowers and everything."

I smile. "That's great, you in a relationship, any boys?"

"There's one or two who come by the shop religiously," she mused. "But their only fun to flirt with."

I laugh. "You slut, gosh." I grin.

Then Naruto stood. "And I think, since it seems quite rude to forget why we are even here, a toast to the nearlyweds!" he grins and ordered a new round of drinks and sakura grinned and blushed.

"You don't have-" she began but Naruto silenced her.

"To Shika and Sakura, the perfect couple." He said solemnly. The group laughed, because they knew well enough that they were so mismatched it was a wonder they were together at all.

And down goes another glass… erggg… how was I so stupid? I need coffee. Bad.

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**7:45 **

It was like 5:07 when I went downstairs, I woke up early, ze hangover isn't too bad at all, once I had about 4 cups of coffee into my system. God I'm unhealthy.

Shika was downstairs reading the paper, he looked surprised when he saw me come down. "Wow. Was expecting YOU to sleep past the wedding."

"Shut up." I grumble and put the kettle on. "It's not funny."

He laughs anyway. "Seriously, you know last night you shoved a lampshade in my face and said it smelt nice?"

I smack my head against the fridge. "Yeah, I know. I can't remember it but I found a diary entry."

He laughs again. "Haven't seen you that drunk since your going away party, you hardly ever drink, even at your 18th you only had one and a half weak ones."

"Ehh…" I say and sit down with my coffee. "I have to go and try on the dress Sakura bought, don't I?" I said.

"It fits, we asked Naruto for your size." He said. "_It's tomorrow_, it's not like we haven't organised things."

"Shhhh." I say. "You talk soooooo loud."

"And you suck at drinking, you have about three and then start talking like there's no tomorrow."

"Oh god, what'd I say?" I say, taking another huge sip of coffee.

"Nothing much, told stories, about vents and made lots of bad puns about ad_vent_ures." He laughed.

"Dear God…" I say, rubbing my face.

"Don't worry, everybody else was tipsy, so they laughed. But besides that you talked lots about a guy called Kimimaro." He gave me a look. "You do realize now nobody thinks you'll leave. Everybody just thinks your gonna hook up with him instead."

"NO! No, no, no! I don't like Kim _that_ way!" I say hastily. "We're just great friends!"

"Yeah I know." He said, looking at me intently. He was a lot like Sasuke with perceptiveness. "But you do know that nobody even hints at thinking that you'd ever do something as horrible as Sasuke did."

I sigh. "I know."

"How are you going to pull this off?"

"Wait until Naruto is completely safe with Sasuke, he is afraid I'll leave, you know. He _knows_, somewhere deep down, that I'll go, just is too afraid to look at it just yet. He thinks we'll be a trio forever and life with be great and the sun will shine everyday." Shika nods and I let out a huge sigh. "He never notices that when the sun shines everyday you'll be left with a drought."

Shika ruffles my hair and takes the coffee cup. "You need a rainy day every once in a while. Another coffee?"

"Yes please, yeah, rain is good for the soul. He just has this pretty happy perfect world in his head and doesn't want to let go of it." I say quietly. "But it hurts to leave him, he needs so much care and protection."

"Then he does _need_ this, Sora, you _are_ still looking after him by going. He can't live in his happy perfect world. And you leaving will wake him up. Sasuke leaving was crap and useless, yours isn't. Hopefully he'll see that."

I sigh and take the new cup of coffee. "Thanks Shika, I've missed you. Sasuke is good to talk too, but he never says things that make me feel better. He just listens."

"That's a good thing. Too much advice can ruin things. When I was going to ask sakura to marry me I got tonnes of advice, and you know what?"

I smile. "What?"

"I ignored it all and just asked her straight out. No roses, no fancy dinners. And it was perfect."

I smile. "She would have liked it you know."

"The roses and things? I know-"

"No, the honesty. She keeps up the act a bit. I think she would have liked it that you treated her so normally and unlike everyone else would have treated her, it shows you really know her."

"Thanks Sora, I've missed you. Nobody is good to talk too, but he never says things that make me feel better. He just listens." Shika imitated me.

I laugh. "Shut up! And I'm sure Nobody is much nicer then Sasuke when it comes to asking advice."

He laughs. "Probably."

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**6:12 pm **

Feel much better, Sakura and I went to the dress shop where the clothing was being kept and I tried on my bridesmaid dress. The theme was of course pink, as everyone would have expected it too be. White and pink.

Sakura's dress is beautiful, simple but beautiful, strapless sleek white at the top, close fitting to show her amazing figure, and it fans out at the hips, going long at the back with an underskirt of flat white material. Her veil was a net of stones with white lace running into a long veil. I squealed when I saw it.

"You. Are. Such. A. Sexy. Saucy. Minx." I said, examining her.

"Have you been drinking again?" she asked.

"No! You are, you sexy thing, though why is it so long, your hiding your hot legs!" I complained.

She laughed. "Coz I'd rather not look like a slut at my wedding."

I pout. "Damn… you take all the fun out of it."

"But you can, my dear. Check out your dress." I pale.

"You didn't, did you?"

"It's just a little shorter, don't worry…" she grinned.

I take out the mass of pink material, it was tight at the top again and got to above my knee before curving around to become longer at the back. Except in mine, there was no underskirt. A big white bow ran around the waist of it. "See, now _you_ can see your hot legs!" she teased. I pull it down a bit. "Here are the shoes and gloves are there too."

They were _quite_ high strappy heels of hot pink with white stones at the strap. "I will never be able to walk in these, love." I say meaningfully. And I don't think you'd really like a clumsy maid of honour.

"Sure I do. Put them on. I made them extra high so you're not so short." I glare insanely at her as I shove them on my feet. I was brought up to nearly her height, she scooped my hair up with her hands. "And hair in a messy bun, but we have make-up artists hired for the day. You'll be gorgeous, just watch out for the boys." She teased.

I glared at her. And hitched up the boobtube of the top to try and reduce the cleavage-look. "What next, do I have a tiara and peacocks on a leash to wander around with?" I say sarcastically.

"Peacocks, no, but we do have a tiara if you want it."

I twitch. "I'm right."

"Oh, just try it!" she said, and got it from the box and put it on my head, it was just a plain white-silvery circlet. I glared at my reflection moodily.

"Do you really not like it that much?" she said, hurt.

I sigh. "No, it's wonderful, I really do like it." I say, smiling, I would just deal, it's her wedding. "It's just a bit short, you see."

She waved her hand. "Pfft. You never wear anything above knee-level, I decided to open your horizons to the perks of short things."

"Short? Or slut?"

She smiled. "Both."

And then I was dragged off to a manicure session and a haircut, it was nice though, because we just chatted the whole way though, I feel quite insane and pretty and I smell horrible, Naruto laughed when he saw me drag my dress back to the house and put it on his bed. "Look." I said.

He held it up. "You'd look good."

"Okay, now look at the hemline." I say, pointing.

"Bit short, don'tcha think?" he grinned. "I may have to fend off the boys. This may be the first time in history that anybody has seen above your knees."

"No way! I have shown above my knees before!"

"What, your really way-to-big teddy-bear boxers?" he asked. "I think that's the only item of clothing you have that's above the knee. And I'm interested in knowing how many people you have shown those too…" he said, raising his eyebrows at me.

I hit him. "You, Sasuke and Sakura." I said. "To everybody else they don't exist." I say, purposefully leaving out Gaara. "I have no above-knee!"

"Point being I think I've seen your thighs once, and that was the time you had to come out of the shower without pants on because you'd forgotten to bring them in." he laughed. I blushed.

"I do too have clothing above the knee." I snap, putting the dress away.

"As if."

"What about swimmers?" I say pertly.

"Which you wear board shorts with." He said.

I flush. "Well, I can wear what I want!" I snap.

He laughed. "Not here you can't, this is Sakura's wedding."

I glare. "I know." And snapped the box shut. He caught sight of my manicured nails and laughed more, wandering out of the room laughing.

At which point I decided to take out his suit. And as I little revenge I went downstairs with the traditional suspenders and tie from his suit and put them on and walked around the house until he noticed and tackled me and made me put them upstairs.

Hahahaha. Revenge. Now I need more coffee. Shika makes good coffee.

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**Hellooo!! I'm going away for a while!! So don't stress if I don't update for about 4 days or so! It's end of MY holidays and I'm off to visit friends before I am thrown back in school! OHHNOOO!! **

**Anyhoo, hoped you luurved it! THANKS HEAPS!! THANKSSS SOOOO MUUCHHHH FOR THE REVEEIIWWSSSSSSS!! **

_**LOVE**_** LOVE love ****looooove**** LUUURRVVEE love **_**LOVEEEE**_** to-LOVE-is(not)-to-lie! **

**P.s. I LOOOVEE YOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU (That's right. You. you right there. YOOOOOUU!! Just you.) **


	31. Wedding Bells

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**Chapter Thirty-One: **

_I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.__ - __George Burns_

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**7:25pm**

Soooo nervous. The venue is in a church, to my dislike, but it's a pretty old cathedral-like one with beautiful windows and platforms. We wake up at 7 to get ready and go to the church, where we help set up (most of it is already there, all we need to do is help with flowers, curtesy of Ino) then get hair and make-up done. There are two other bridesmaids, Ino and Tenten are the other bridesmaids and their dresses are basically the same as mine but with little differences, like no stupid tiara and with a white underskirt and no bow. Why can't I have their dresses? Their heels are lower too, to even the height difference. Stupid short-ness.

Naruto and I have a speech ready, since the best man is supposed to make one, but of course Naruto sucks speech-wise and so we both made it. Well, I made it and he didn't bother me. Which is how things are 'spose to work anyhoo.

NervousNervousNervous. So nervous I even said no to COFFEE! Naruto is asleep and I can hear him snore… geh…. Hate his snoring.

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**Wedding Dayyy!! I CAN HEAR WEDDING BEELLSSSS!!- Friday 27/5/18**

Wowowowowoowowowoowow. Nervous. Sakura should come in soon to get me out of bed. Naruto is already up. Wowowoowowowow. Nervous.

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**Almost Midnight**

It was magical. I'm really jealous, as any girl would be, literally perfect wedding. At 7am Sakura came in and got me to just shove trackies and a jumper on, we raced off in a really stylish car to the church, which wasn't really a church anymore, just a wedding and special occasion venue, so it had special rooms for prep and the such, Sakura, being bride-like, goes to another room to have her dress put on properly and fixed and be make-up'd first, while us bridesmaids go to another room to get out of our trackies (Tenten being still in her PJ pants) before anyone sees us.

Dresses in hand we raced in, Ino and Tenten already being there half dressed, I slip into the dress and Ino stares. "Man, I didn't even know your thighs existed." She said.

I glare, but before I could snap something back Tenten put in. "They don't, look how skinny she is." Tenten pouts.

"Yeah, but I'm a midget so you can't blame me." I say, sniffing.

They all laugh and continue dressing, once we're all in our dresses we fix tops and the such, of course Ino doesn't mind her cleavage-causing dress, but I do! And pull it up and adjust my bra so I don't jiggle as much. Glaring insanely at my reflection. "I never thought it'd have this kinda boob problem." I grumble. "I'm short, I shouldn't have to worry."

"It's me too, don't worry." Tenten says, hitching to boobtube up as well.

Letting our hair out, it's weird to see Tenten with her long brown hair out of its usual bun, and Ino's hair out of its pony-tail.

The make-up artists are still doing Sakura's make-up, so Ino and I decide to take a sneak-peek of the room, it was stunning. Long, wooden themed with a white carpet running down the middle of the hall, wooden benches for seats, not too comfy but they looked good. White roses were attached to each seat, every second bunch had a few bright pink roses in the bunch. The alter was draped with white and slight additions of pink here and there. There were still people adjusting flowers and putting up veils of white fabric, they kept giving us dirty looks so we went back to the room.

After what seemed like years of waiting Sakura came out. She has always been beautiful, truly, but now she was practically breathtaking, she smiled and we all nearly fainted, before we started screaming insanely.

"OHMYGOD! YOU LOOK SOOO HOT!"

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! Well, actually I can… BUT STILL! OH MY GOD!"

"YOU SAUCY MINX YOU!" At my last comment they stop to look at me weird, I grin. "It's true, look at her! The sexy thing."

They laugh and agree. "Yes, defiantly."

And after we finish obsessing over Sakura's amazingness we are shuffled into the make-up and hair room too. It was weird, having all these people cluck over you and touch you and mess with your hair and face.

The bow at the back of my dress needed to be wired and adjusted so it sat just right, and my hair was put up into a loose but formal bun with the tiara on top. I do use make-up, it's not like I'm some kinda insane tom boy, but not even half the amount that was piled onto my face today. Concealer X 100, about 100 tonnes of a mix of foundation, powder and bronzer, combined with about 11 pounds of mascara, a touch of pink eyeliner on the top lid and clear lip gloss made us like those mannequins you see in shop windows that look too perfect. I smile half-heartedly at my reflection but then shrug. This is what Sakura wants me to look like, and it's her wedding after all.

After the make-over, we wait. Really, the decorators don't like people getting in their way and so we just sit and squeal excitedly. Somebody delivers bouquets of roses for us and the bride to carry, ours pink hers white.

The Photographer that they had hired for the event came in and took some photo's of us all, then just Sakura, then just us. And then we waited again. We were all jittery, Sakura especially.

"Wow. Your _wedding_." Ino sighed happily. "I really can't believe it. Marrying a high-school sweetheart, how cliché…" she said, grinning.

Sakura hit her. "You're just jealous."

"The sad thing is; you're so right." She laughs.

And then we heard people arrive, the flower girl was that girl that Naruto's old stalker kid hung around with, she was about 15 now, and we handed her a basket of flowers and she sat with us, fussing over Sakura and telling her how pretty she was. Sakura deserved it; a wedding is a bride's day.

And then after what seemed like days, it all went so quickly, before we knew it Sakura was walking down that aisle, and then on the alter, and then saying 'I do' and then listening to Shika return the vow, and then kissing and then running out. My head spun with it all going so fast, was all that long hours of dressing and make-up all for what seemed like two minutes of standing in a daze at what was happening?

I remember walking out like a stunned mullet Naruto in front of me, we had a group photo, and then I remember Sakura threw the flowers up, and they landed in my face. That woke me up, of course, forgetting where I was I picked them up and threw them back saying "You dropped these!"

The crowd of watchers stared for a moment, then burst into laughter, I remember realizing what I'd done and flushing red. Whoops…

"Oh! Oh… sorry…" I said, grinning.

Sakura threw it back, laughing. "I think you earned this." she said, I caught it half-heartedly.

"You sure? I don't call that much of a catch."

She nodded. "Sure." And grinned. "Enjoy."

And so we waved them off, as they drove off in the car. I see no point in this, mainly because we'll see them tonight at the dinner/ after party. After savouring the jealous looks I got from other girls here, (seeing as not many weddings occur in Konoha, this is quite special) I wander off to find Naruto. He looks at my flowers.

"So you'll be the next married, ay?" he asked.

I smile at him. "I'm not sure if married would be the word, that's only for people who _catch_ the bouquet. I got hit in the face with it, what'll that mean?"

"You stay with your best friend forever instead?" he joked, even though I saw the hints of truth in his eyes, yearning.

I laugh, ignoring his hidden seriousness. "Sure, and then I'll agree to celibacy and stop drinking."

He laughs. "Your too entertaining when your drunk, you wouldn't wanna deprive the world of that, would you?"

"No, because me losing brain cells is always entertaining." I roll my eyes and take off my heels to walk with bare feet. "Ahhh… that feel so much better, you have no idea."

We walk back to Sakura's house, it all feels like a dream, I wish I could go into detail about what happened. But I can't. Not like when I arrived, it's like here, it went so quickly, I had no time to commit to memory the details. It was a wedding. It was magical. It smelt of roses and lots of people came. I really don't' know what else to say, is there anything else? Was a wedding worth all the fuss, I don't know, I guess it depends on you. but if I had the choice I'd get married with jeans on in some kinda of drive in chapel whilst pregnant. That's the way ta gooo.

Well, not really. Minus the preggers. And the drive-in chapel. But still jeans + T-shirt all the way. And maybe sensible shoes, just for the special occasion and all. But to tell the truth, there's only one man I'd marry, and I don't think he'd approve of a jeans and T-shirt wedding at a drive-thru chapel while I'm pregnant. Infact, for some weird reason I have the feeling that he'd be the proper and neat type who'd like something more official and less drive-thru.

But it's not like I have to plan for that anyway, so really all I have to do now is marry a rock or something that wouldn't care if I was pregnant with little twin pebbles and was in jeans and a T-shirt.

Infact, this just proves it, how dazed and stunned-mullet I was, I spent more detail on my marriage to a rock then I did on details of Shika and Sakura's _non_-imaginary WEDDING.

Now, now I'm getting into the stupid little party dress Sakura picked out for me, knowing quite rightly that if she didn't pick one out for me I'd turn up in (surprise surprise) jeans and a T-shirt.

….. Really, what does getting hit in the face with the bride's bouquet mean? Is that a good sign? Or a really horrible sign, was it just the flowers way of yelling 'DON'T DO IT WOMAN! COME BACK AND LIVE HAPPILY HERE WITH LEE OR SOMEBODY!'

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**HELLOOO!! Back from Holidays! I will be a diligent and commited updater from now on!! PROMISE!! Coz I'm not going away for ages now!! Thanks soooooo much for reviews!! THHANKKKYOOUU!!**

**IIII LOOOOVVEE YOOUUU!! **

**Love, to-love-is-to-lie**

**p.s. hope you liked it!! (hint hint, review nudge nudge) **


	32. Dinner

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**Chapter Thirty-Two: **

_The human brain starts working from the moment your born, and never stops until the first time you stand to speak in public. –George Jessel _

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**28/5/18 – 11pm**

The dinner was really amazing, this I CAN go into detail about. Naruto and I spent ages getting ready, while I knew others would be re-doing make-up all over again, I screwed my skin for once and just left the professional stuff on. The party dress was short. Again. Naruto laughed at the fact my thighs might be getting some kind of tan. I pointed out it was night time and he pouted and went off to find his less-fancy suit. What the hell is the difference? SUITS LOOK ALL THE SAME!!

I do forget how 'hot' Naruto is, but he's my best friend, as if you'd think of him that way. To me, he's Naruto, I only notice Sasuke's 'Hotness' because he is so amazingly hot that even me (best friend) is forced to notice it. But it's a good thing, because I can warn him over and over not to wear flattering things because it's ripping girl's hearts out as he walks by them.

But then again, I still reckon if I put him in a clown suit and flippers he'd make girls swoon, but I'm sure they'd recover in less then 2 hours, unlike when he wears nice things, where it takes the poor things over a day to think clearly again.

Since ages ago Naruto had agreed to be my date there so both he and I (mainly him since I didn't plan then on wearing this sultry little number that shows my thighs) weren't harassed by people who just want a shag/marriage and have sex and babies with the bridesmaids and best man.

And so we head out, me wearing smaller green heels to match the tiny fitting green dress that flipped around when I walked and turned my hips, showing more of my legs. Sakura planned this, I bet.

We got picked up by Shika and Sakura, who had to come back here to get changed too, to every other guest they would look like they had been for a romantic drive through the countryside, having passionate sex at various intervals, but of course we know the real story and that's that they came home, snuggled up by the couch and drank lots of coffee.

Add that to my wedding list. Okay, so now my requirements are:

Pregnancy

Jeans + T-shirt

A rock or some kind of inanimate object

A drive-thru chapel

Coffee

A thing of foil to make some kind of wedding ring out of. It has to be sturdy foil too. Not that cheap stuff you get from those corner-stores. Trust me; I know their foil is shotty. I have experience here.

And possibly a hillbilly accent. And a 2 year old baby (from another husband). OH OH OH! And a tooth missing.

And so we drove off with them, all exited, Sakura in a much shorter dress and higher heels, this look is a look which I find is hard to pull off without looking like a very expensive hooker, but she did it.

The venue was white again, huge, with round tables everywhere and flowers on each of them, assigned seats found Naruto and I at a table with Shika, Sakura, Ino, Lee, Chouji and Tenten.

The food arrived, and before we started, Lee decided to make the toast. Of course, lee, I saw Sakura freeze as he stood, but I patted her arm. "Don't worry; Lee makes amazing toasts, doesn't he?" I say, grinning, she smiled back and relaxed.

To our surprise, he just stood, called for attention, and said "To what should be the happiest couple of them all, Sakura and Shikamaru." He raised his wine. "Cheers."

Everyone else raised their glass and murmured "Cheers" back and drank. Then the chatter rose, and people laughed and got to know one-another and ate and as the night went on things got louder, and eventually Naruto nods to me. We stand and Naruto tries to be posh and taps his glass. I roll my eyes. "You know nothing." I tell him and stand on my chair. "OI! LISTEN!" I yell, silence as people turn to stare. "Speech." I said, pointing at Naruto.

"Ah! Best man's speech!" People call.

This irks me, because really it's the best maid's speech too. But I shrug and let Naruto start. "Well, I guess they met out of really unusual circumstances, I remember the highschool days of staying at Sora's-" I sigh loudly. Naruto turns to me. "What, you think you can do better?" he snapped. The people here (mostly) know us, and they chuckled.

"Yeah, I do. Who knows why they get the best _man_ to make a speech." I say, rolling my eyes, and standing. "Okay, really, I did write a speech for him, but he seems to have either totally forgotten it or ignored it, but I assure you, it was short and hilarious." I say, glaring at him. "Who knows what words of amazing wisdom were lost. I even wrote it down on palmcards for him, but he told me that that was too shabby for a wedding. Well, so is your speech buddy." I glare at him, and he sits. People laugh again. And I sigh. "Well, after that interesting story of how Naruto screwed up my amazing speech, this is Sakura and Shikamaru's night, and really, I wouldn't wanna screw it up with a last-minute speech. So all I have to say is that if anyone, anyone at all thinks that these two amazing people don't deserve the best of everything life has to offer, step outside for a moment." I say, glaring at the crowd. "And I'll show you how vicious short people can really be." The crowd smiles lovingly at me, which kinda just makes me annoyed, they smile as if I'm some kinda little kid who is still being childish. "No, I'm seriously. I love these two. A lot. And if any of you, anyone at all, even the under 10's here, -that's right I'm watching you lot- can name something bad about them, no, more appropriately, _will _name something bad about them, then yeah, step outside." I glare. "Anyway, all I gotta say is wow. And since I have a really slow reaction time, in about two weeks I'll wake up in the middle of the night and yell 'SHIKA AND SAKURA ARE MARRIED!?' insanely, but until then, while I'm calm, I say, good luck, even though you don't need it coz your both perfect, best of luck to both of you!" I say and raise my glass. "Cheers!"

Slow applause rose, and Naruto pouted. "That was my speech!" he grumbled once people had stopped clapping and nodding their heads in approvement.

Sakura was teary, and hugged me from over the table. "Thanks so much Sora, really." She hugged me tighter. "Thanks."

Shika patted Naruto's back. "At least it was only Sora, being upstaged by Sora is something to be proud of." He said, Naruto just glared.

After a while, people drank more and talked less and then started to move to the dance floor. I only have 2, since I really didn't wanna leave with a hangover. But I did sit still for about 2 seconds until the hopefuls started working on the bridesmaids, Ino was the first to go with a cute brown eyed curly-haired guy, Tenten was swept away unwillingly by a mad dancing lunatic who wouldn't take 'no' for an answer and I gave off such a glare that it took Naruto to get me to dance, but of course, once I was out of my chair and my brooding-hen face, people started asking for the next dance. But what really pissed me off is that they asked _Naruto_ and not _me_, so every time somebody did that, I'd yell. "OI! BUDDY! I'M DOWN HERE!" until they got freaked out and just left.

But then I drank another one, and just let myself be thrown around the dancefloor from partner to partner knowing that at least Sakura couldn't say I was antisocial.

And so the night went on, really, I went home early, sneaking out the back to creep home, running through Konoha, which is quite dangerous at night, if you ask me. I ran past my road, stopping as I passed it.

My legs, well, not just my legs, my whole body, really, it was leaning foreword dramatically telling me 'go! Please! Just one look!' in the direction of my house. I shake myself. Remembering my promise to Naruto.

"I'm sorry… another time, another place." I grin, thinking that was kinda impossible, and jogging off.

I was home alone, and had refused to get a key, so after getting a window open with a bobby pin, I discovered Shika was quite posh, and had invested in flyscreens, which made it really quite hard to fit in the window.

So after trying to think of an alternative, I decided if I stayed out any longer I'd get raped and just got my stiletto out and punch a hole in the flyscreen, made it big enough to just squeeze though, and got through into the house.

After getting clear tape and fixing it, I got a mug of hot chocolate and went to bed. And now I'm here. Thinking.

It all went so fast… so fast. I go home tomorrow, and I really don't want too. I want to move back here now, and once I've got my house I'll go find Gaara. And then we'll both move back here and it'll all be like it used too.

I'm really tired… you know, maybe early tomorrow, I'll go have a quick look at my house… you know? Just to check on it… see if the people renting it are doing okay…. Just a quick look….

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**HEY ALL!! Quick update for ya! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING! WOOO!! THANKS!! I LUURVVE YOUUU!! Really, you are all HILARIOUS, truly. And in the good way, you guys make me laugh! **

**And just because I think some of you (you know who you are) are going to have nervous breakdown if I don't assure this, take a look at the summary, Gaara ****WILL**** be in the story, so don't stress too much! And no, can't tell you when. That'd just ruin the story :P but she'll have a good reason to go, I can say that in the least. **

**So, hope your all really good! Continue being the wonderful people you are! OHHNOO!! I HAVE EXXXAMMSS! HALF-YEARLY!! NOOOOOO!! Anyhoo, while I go and have a screaming match with my friends over who's study technique is the best, HAVE A GREAT DAY! **

**THANKSSOMUCHFORREVEIWING!! LUURVVEEE to-love-is-to-lie**


	33. Home Is Where the Heart Is

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**Chapter Thirty-Three:**

_The reason lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn't there the second time. - __Willie Tyler_

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**27/5/18 – 6am, I REALLY shouldn't be doing this. **

Naruto, I think, was smashed, so he'll sleep until at least midday. Hopefully. Sakura has a bad reaction to late nights and'll be sleeping until at least 1 or 2, but Shika is who I need to get past. Wish me luck!

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**4pm **

I'd got downstairs and found Shika on the couch reading the paper, gulped, and the walked back upstairs. I knew he wouldn't want me doing this either. Nobody would.

'_It's a stupid idea, Sora._' Sakura would reprimand.

'_What were you thinking_?!' Kakashi would say.

'_What a drag…_' Shika would roll his eyes.

'_You promised me_.' That last voice in my head made the wasp nest of guilt in my stomach pick up, Naruto would be cut. I just needed to make sure I was back early, before anyone noticed. I got into the attic, the end room that was just full of junk, and found a rope, tied it too an old wardrobe doorknob and tested my weight on it. No way. Not trusting that. I untie the rope and test other objects around the room until I come across a sturdy old dressing table, which I loop the rope around, put it near the window and then slip out, it immediately presses against the window, but it's too big to fall out the little window, so it's okay. After reaching the outside, I tip-toe around the back, before picking up my joggers and running off.

Maybe I shouldn't be doing this, I think to myself. Infact, I really shouldn't be doing this. At all. There's still time to turn back, you know, pretend I just dropped something out my window, they'd believe that…

Why am I taking this so seriously? As if it even matters, I'm just curious. Maybe my cats will remember me, but I think the old ladies down the road might have run them all over by now.

My road was so familiar. Exactly the same, so the same that I felt out of place in it. that made my hands shake. My eyes stung already and I shook it off and kept walking. Imagining with relish that I was walking back from school. Ah, how the image slipped in so readily, how my mind wanted to think that. How relaxing it felt.

I was _Sora_, 16…. Happy, maybe I could visit Gaara later, and see Temari and make Sasuke take my shift at work…. No! I couldn't. I open my eyes quickly before I get too lost in the past. I fix my vision on the road. Bad gravel. It was always horrible gravel.

The bad gravel turns to tar, and I look up, and my heart lurches. This has changed, it used to be the place I worked, what was it now? It was a server station. I glared at the stupid pumps and shiny automatic-doors. Before turning my head to a small warehouse near it. Kiba died there, I saw him, I remember because I was driving the van home. I lick my suddenly dry lips and turn again, to see a broken down old compartment at the back of the server stations, wood over the windows. My eyes widen and I run up.

"No way…" I breathe, my hands shaking more. "No…. way… The Batcave…." I say, wrapping my hands around a plank of wood and pulling, it came off easily, the nails shabby and rusted. Inside it was dusty, but still had the same tall cabinet and brown bench at the end. I look around quickly, who would be around at 5 in the morning? And crawl in through the broken window. I cough instantly, it was dusty beyond all belief, I sit on the benches. These would usually be covered with grain sacks… possibly corn, the comfiest place in the building….. I touched the walls, where engraved in there was big '_SORA ROCKS_!' and _'NARUTO SUCKS_!' and various games of naughts and crosses scrawled all over it. I smile at it, and slip off the bench and around the corner and sigh, looking at my poor Batcave. Nobody will ever appreciate your amazing brilliance at bringing people together ever again, I open the cabinet as I go to leave, knowing people would arrive to work at the server station soon, on the inside of the door was a roster, I stop to look at it. It was mine… on it we'd all written, Sasuke, Naruto… Me… I look around, as if somebody would call this stealing, and pry it off the door, coughing more at the amount of dust I inhale. Folding it, I tuck it in my jeans pocket and crawl out the window, fitting the plank of wood back across the window, gently slipping the nails into the same holes they'd been in.

I sigh at it sadly. Somehow I knew I wouldn't come back to the Batcave again. There was nothing left there for me, nothing but a few graffiti'd notes across the wall and a roster, which I'd removed. All the good times there had been removed, the corn bags, the stacks of produce…. The people….

I pat the storeroom and keep walking, feeling faintly proud, despite my shaking hands. I'd been fine, as if it's some big deal, why should I not come to visit? I own the house, you know. I'm allowed to check on whoever is renting it. I'm not really breaking a promise, just fulfilling a job as a landlord.

So I continued my walk down the road, putting my feet in the same places I knew I'd walked before, seeing the same patches of grass and feeling as if I knew them, as if we shared a secret. Puddles were still there, it must have rained recently. I just wished a car would come by and soak me. Just for old time's sake.

Gaara's turnoff came up first, I saw the tall pine tree's that line his driveway, his like the Batcave, his house held nothing for me without the people in it. It hurt more to find that these places didn't hurt me. They should. It's not me getting stronger; it's these places getting weaker. And that scared me.

My breath came out misty as I walked straight to my driveway, and I frowned. There was no car, no nothing. It was empty… But I'd still been getting rent, the whole time. I'd never met the people who rented my house, just liked the money they sent every month.

I walked slowly, hesitantly up to the big main livening room window, seeing the barely covered front door, and remembering the time I found a small half beaten to death girl there. Why was it empty? People should live here…. and if they don't, I shouldn't be getting money. I sigh, this is technically breaking and entering, but I don't care… I get a bobby pin from my pony tail and run around the side door, looking for the window I knew couldn't lock. I slid the bobby-pin under it and then once it was wide enough fit my nail in it, and then got my finger through, then two, then three, and then my palm and it was open. I try to get in, but then I realized I'd never broken into my own home, and realize that the window was too high, and I was too short. Cursing, I search around in the wintery scrub for a rock, finding something semi suitable but not really safe, I stand on it, and get one leg onto the windowsill, and wince, it was like doing the splits sideways.

Then just sigh, muttering 'fuckitt.' And jumping in, landing on the cold dirty tiled floor of what used to be the bathroom. I let out a long sigh, and dust flies foreward. I roll my eyes and sit up, to survey the room. There was no time for pain and hurt, only confusion. Why would somebody pay rent for a house their not using?

I mean, that money had really gotten us into the sound school. Truly, it was a godsend at times, and now it just goes into my account, which is even better, Naruto had sold his flat, but I couldn't do it, so I just used the excuse of a 'constant income of some kind.' And let it go out to be rented.

But what I don't understand is why? The person who had rented this hasn't even been here. At all. I can tell, this place hasn't been disturbed until now. No-one has come and then recently left, nobody has come in the first place. They just rented it out as if I was some kind of charity to give too.

I wander upstairs, there are things I left… small things, things like hairbands and marbles and earrings. In the cupboard I find paper, lots of it, and coathangers. There was a coat of dust heavier everywhere but spaces where furniture once was, like the TV cabinet, and the sofa. The kitchen was the only place practically unchanged, since you can't remove benches and stoves. In one of the cupboards there was a moth, and an old frypan.

My deep thought of who the hell was renting this place was disrupted by a loud meow. _This_ jolted emotion in me. I run straight to the back door, my shoes sliding on the dusty floor in my haste to find the owner of the meow, I run out the back door, after spending some time trying to open it, it's always been rusty, but lack of exercise has made it fat now too. Outside was something that did stir the love and emotion I wished the Batcave had, outside was a little mangy stray cat, I pick it up and held it. "I'm so sorry! I had to leave; you're probably all hungry and flea-infested…." I say, hugging it tighter. "Where's everyone else? Have they been run over? They all can't have been!" I say, scratching the cat behind the ear, it was an orange and white thing with scabs all over it from fighting other cats around the neighbourhood. It was a tiny little thing too, god knows how it was still alive.

I tuck the cat, it was pretty small and had little resistance, into my jacket and walk upstairs, I sit in what used to be my room. I remember this… here was where the bed was… I touch the empty space where it was supposed to be and then turn to the window, the cat mewed and I petted it. A car went by, I wonder what time it is? I'd been there a while. A long while…

Maybe just a little longer, I sigh and walk to the windowsill and sit outside it, my feet dangling down against the outside walls, watching the road. In my mind I saw it how it used to be, with amount of snow here and there, old tree's and cat's about the place, in my mind I heard footsteps coming up the road.… from where Gaara and I had been…

_Maybe I should clean up… just a bit, before he gets here… Nah, it's not like he'll care. Hey, I hear footsteps! _

_Running outside I quickly shove on a large coat and gumboots before wading out into the show and leaping on Gaara. He laughs as I call "GGAARRAA!! I missed yoouu!!" _

_"You act as If you haven't seen me in years." He says and pry's me off him. _

"… I haven't…" I whisper.

Why wasn't I sad? Why wasn't I crying? I wanted to, but I couldn't, why couldn't I? These places where supposed to make me bawl. But they weren't. Was it that true, that the memories where with the people, and not the places? I shook and rocked back and foreword, the cat in my jumper, just glad to be somewhere warm, mewed in protest. Footsteps… footsteps… there they were again, in my head, but so much louder this time. I open my eyes and Shika was staring up at me.

"How'd I know I'd find you here?" He said.

"How long?"

"Four hours." He says, checking his watch.

I nod slowly, numbly. Why wasn't I sad? Was it because these places suddenly weren't mine anymore? "You really shouldn't be in there!" he called up again. "Somebody else does live there you know."

"No they don't." I say quietly. "It's empty. All empty."

Shika frowns. "But you have been getting rent money, haven't you?"

I nod. "Why would somebody pay for a house they're not going to live in? It's quite a bit of money too."

Shika nods, deep in thought, and the cat in my jacket meows loudly, more footsteps, this time I knew they weren't in my mind. "I'm sorry." I say, knowing who was down there. "But I was curious…"

"Whatever Sora, just come down." Naruto said, I heard the mistrust, and the hurt in his voice.

"Sora! Please come down, it's cold!" Sakura said, I heard her teeth chatter in her voice. "I'm f-freezing!"

I stared out into the icy blue sky, my hands going numb, I felt the cat purr against my stomach and sighed. "You probably want some breakfast…" I say to it, it meows in return and I turn around to walk down the stairs and come out the front door, not the window.

They all look worried, glaring insanely at me as I walk down the driveway, you know, something in my is sadder that I can't say 'that same ol' drive way' if I could, I would be crying, yes. But it's like I'm numb from shock, why did I come here? _To_ cry? To be sad? Curiosity? I have no idea. But I have neither of those feelings now, and that's what scares me, if these places can't make me remember and feel, what can?

The cat in my jacket meows again and I smile at it. "Well, you of course." I say to it and join the group down at the end of the driveway.

Lee, Kakashi and Iruka came running and then stop when they round the corner and see us. "Oh, we thought we'd check here- oh, Sora!" they pant, obviously they'd jogged here.

I frown at Shika, knowing he was the only one I could look in the eye at the moment. "Why are they all here?"

He narrows his eyes. "Why'd you think?" when I don't answer he continues. "You, Sora, we wake up in the morning and Naruto comes running downstairs mad as hell saying your gone, and the answer to my 'But I didn't see her leave…' was a rope in the attic. Of course, first thing we do is call Kakashi and Iruka and Lee and see if you're with any of them, then when –to our surprise- your not there, then we panic." He sighs. "You can't just run off like that."

"You could have at least told us! Left a note, anything!" Sakura chided, like an angry mother.

I flush, knowing they were right, but how could've I? I glare instead. "You wouldn't have let me go. I would have had half the time I got." I say.

"Doesn't matter! We were worried!"

And then I frown, and something clicks, I look up at them all accusingly. "You all think I can't look after myself…" I say, I'm not asking, it was a fact.

Kakashi looks guilty, Lee and Iruka fix their eyes on the ground while Shika and Sakura look at me like worried parents. Naruto does nothing. "Sora! No, it's not like-"

I cut them off. "Don't lie. I'm a grown woman, you let me drink alcohol and stay up all night and yet you won't even let me go for a walk? Infact! I shouldn't even have to ask! You shouldn't have to '_let'_ me do anything! You all think I can't look after myself…" I trail off again, sending glares around the circle of people that I trusted, but had it been something all known between them? That Sora is emotionally unstable and needs surveillance at all times?

"Sora-"

"No, not like-"

"We don't-"

"Seriously-"

They all start at the same time, trying to say otherwise but I know better. They treat me like a kid, but I'm the mature one who pulled them out of whatever they were in before, how dare they! I should be the one watching out for them – and I am! - Not Vis versa and I'm not a little kid! I don't know what they see in me that need be protected, but I hate it. They all stumble more with words, but Naruto speaks above them.

"Yeah. We do." He says, staring right into my eyes.

I hadn't expected that, and I nod, silent. "Why?"

"Because you need to be looked after, who says that a little tiny thing like, say, Temari showing up could come up while we're not around and you could feint into a pool but this time there is no Sasuke to save you, what then, Sora?"

"I can save myself! Stop looking after me!"

"We can't Sora, what do you think you'd do? You can't save yourself or make reasonable decisions! We all wake up and you'd taken a rope out an attic window! And to god knows where! You could have been anywhere from Sound to Suna, for all we knew you'd ran off!"

I open my mouth to retaliate, but nothing comes out, so, the truth is revealed. Naruto thought I had left. He now knew, it was all in the open. I nod. "Yes… I was childish, selfish, I should be grounded and restrained to my room only, go back to Sound without me, Naruto, I'll stay here where I'm safe." I say, quite seriously. If he thinks I need care, let's see him realize how much care he requires.

"No, I didn't mean that…" Naruto starts. "Just that you should be more considerate of the people who care for you."

My mind rages, care for me? _Care for me_? I knew he didn't mean that in the 'we really care about you' sense. He meant it in the 'I go to day-care' sense. I shove the anger down into my stomach and along with the wasp-nest of guilt and the butterflies of excitement, is shoved the bull-terrier of anger, and it was tearing things apart in there. "I am quite considerate." I say, smiling in that 'way-to-pleasant-for-arguing' way. "And that's why I think I should tell my renter that he or she has to move, I'll come back here and visit Shika and Sakura everyday. I can go to this Uni, and this way, I won't be hurt, and you won't have the burden of me on your mind 24/7." I say, still smiling.

The lot stare at me, they'd never seen me talk this way, but they'd never given me reason too. I'd only ever _really_ been angry at two people, one was Sasuke, and the other was Gaara, which soon subsided into a vicious loving self-loathing feeling that rises up every time I think of him. Now Naruto was added to that list, all the others, they just care _about_ me. Naruto had this thing in his head that he cared _for_ me, and I wanted to teach him well and truly that he had it wrong, and that he couldn't last a week without me, because Sasuke isn't tender and feelings and love enough for Naruto.

And seeing this go through my head, and the slight triumphant look to my pleasant I-don't-want-to-be-a-burden smile, shook his head at me, and went to save the day, soon following the realization of what I was doing was Kakashi, who glared and agreed wholly with Shika went he spoke.

"Look, whatever we have problems with- actually, whatever you two have problems with- can be worked out inside a house with coffee and tea, it's freezing and Sakura is about to lose her fingers to hypothermia if we stay here much longer." He says, reasonably.

I smile, still over-pleasant about things, now Naruto looked quite pale and worried, and I knew right down that the fact that I _didn't_ _need_ him was there, it was just along with the fact I would leave one day in the piles of knowledge he refuses to look at because he's scared of what he'll see.

I follow the others back, Lee, Kakashi and Iruka, not wanting to stick around for what they thought would be a shouting-match, made bad excuses, hugged me, told me to come back soon and went home.

I walk to Shika and Sakura's and pack my things, go downstairs and Naruto chooses that moment to pack his too, and wanders upstairs without saying a thing. Sakura sighs, puts down her coffee, looks at me apologetically, and wanders upstairs.

I sit quietly, and Shika wanders over with his tea and my coffee. "Sakura is always better with Naruto then I am. I suit talking to you more."

"Sakura is good with kids too, and of course you do." I glower into my coffee and watch the steam rise up before taking a sip. "He deserved it, Shika."

Shika looked away. "It's not really my call to say whether he did or didn't, but lucky for all of us it stopped before anything clicked."

"Why?" I say, sitting up. "Would it really be that bad? He'll find out sometime and maybe it's better to hear form me."

Shika raises his eyebrows. "You really thing so?"

I sigh. "No… But one day he'll come here in a frenzy, and once he sees I'm not here, he'll know. Or maybe he won't even get that far before Sasuke tells him. I don't know, but I just want to go home- no, not home. I have no idea where home is, you see." I say, staring at my coffee. "I expected to find it there, but it wasn't, and if it's not there, where is it?"

Shika put his hand on my shoulder. "Hey, home is where the heart is, and where exactly is yours?"

I smile at him, "Yeah, I guess. Maybe I'll find it there, but it's not until I can actually leave…"

"Yeah, wait it out a little longer, Sor, just wait and see what happens." I nod. "Does Sakura know?"

"No, of course not."

"What happened to the honesty and truth of marriage?" I joke.

He rolls his eyes. "She knows it too, just is too afraid to see it. She'll be with Naruto, out searching for you, until after who knows how many days they finally stop and think, and then they'll yell at me for a while, but then they'll see it's what you really wanted, and no matter how much trouble it causes, it's worth it."

I nod, and sigh. "Thanks Shika. Thanks heaps, really." I smile and drink my coffee.

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**HELLOOO!! Hope your all AWESOME!! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVEEIWING I LOOOOOOOVVEE YOOUUU!!**

**Xoxoxooxoxxoxo, LUUURVE to-love-is-to-lie**


	34. Knowing

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**Chapter Thirty-Four: **

_Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.__ - __Douglas Adams_

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**28/5/18 – Late Afternoon Sat**

The train home was silent. Not just quiet, it was silent. Completely, I think of what Shika said.

_Shika put his hand on my shoulder. "Hey, home is where the heart is, and where exactly is yours?"_

He was right; actually, he was more then right. The only reason those places matter is because of the memories, and without them, really my house was an empty shell, devoid of emotion or happiness. I'd gone expecting to see life and movement in it, but instead it was still and empty, which for some reason made it worse.

I was still proud, I didn't breakdown or cry, even though for a while I was wishing I could, just to ease the disappointment of finding the place bare. The cat I had saved is with Shika and Sakura now, it's still scrawny, but it loves Shika's lap because he doesn't move or fidget like me and Sakura do.

Naruto sat opposite me and stared blankly out the window, he hadn't said anything since our argument and I felt terrible, I was just being a bitch, a reasonable one, but a bitch none-the-less. I walk over an hold on to the pole in the middle of the train and touch his head. "Oi, stop sulking." I say jokingly.

He throws me a dirty look and goes back to staring out the window. I glare. "Seriously, I really don't know what _you've_ got to sulk about."

He totally ignores me this time, not even another dirty look. I sigh and sit back down in annoyance muttering "Whatever…"

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**3:30 **

It reminds me of returning home from that fateful holiday years ago, I remember just flopping on my bed and staring at the ceiling. Which is what I would have done if I hadn't of had Gaara to visit. I listened to the rain hit the roof with force, and slowly let me mind drift off.

It had been a long time on the train, we got home at 3pm, and I went straight to my dorm, still fuming, he'd finally picked up the guts to speak to me on the way through the corridors, I was nearly free, free to sit and burrow into my blankets and spent the last wonderful day and a half of holidays in warm comfy bliss with several family-size blocks of chocolate.

But he decided to ruin it, he decided to come over and say. "Look, Sora, whatever I don't know why you can't see that I care a lot for you, who sat next to you the whole time when you were depressed in hospital? Who helped you study? Who makes sure I've warned you about bad things before they happen?"

I had kept walking, and by the time he had finished his little patronizing speech, I was infront of him. I stop mid-stride and burst out laughing, then keep walking.

"And you can't even manage an 'I'm sorry I take all that for granted'!?" he calls out as I keep walking. I stop again, and laugh more, still giggling as I keep walking.

"Sora! I'm trying to be mature and all you can do is laugh, GROW UP!" he calls out and glares at me.

At this I give up, and swing around. "Hey, Naruto, in answer, are you saying that if you didn't care _for_ me you wouldn't have sat next to me in hospital? Was it something you just felt obliged to do? Duty, was it? You probably got out of the office and said 'Oh man, what a drag.' Hey, I'm sorry I'm such a bore, I'm sorry I take you for fucking granted, I'm sorry I can't seem to grow up and see that I am just a small child that needs looking after." I shrug and make a face. "Deal with it, because I don't plan on changing, so go care for somebody else!"

And with that I walk off, still whistling and laughing to myself, then I was happy-angry, but now with the rain pounding on the roof I'm angry-angry, and the bull-terrier in my stomach started barking again and tore around the bubble, just waiting to be let out so it could tear up all the people that make me angry too.

I sigh, and gently open my eyes and stare at the roof, it as going that kind of dull colour things change to when it's nearly evening and it's raining. I get up, realizing my window was open and it was blowing in freezing air. It was getting so cold, winter was early this year. Bad omen, maybe?

So after deciding that I'd just make myself a hot water bottle and call it an afternoon, I was just settling in and getting comfy when Tayuya comes bursting into my room and yells "SORANO! You're back!"

I roll over and glare. "Yeah, I also was trying to sleep!"

"Whatever, but come! Quickly!"

"Why?" I grumble, but getting out of bed none-the-less.

"Kimmimaro is in hospital again." My blood runs cold for a moment, and I leap out of bed and shove a jacket over my bright blue Pj's and without a second thought run after her frantically.

"What, When, Where… _Why_?" I say, stopping suddenly. "And what do you mean by '_again_'?"

Tayuya stopped and looked at me as if I was an idiot. "Iron deficiency Anemia." She said, glaring.

I don't move, suddenly thinking it was just a joke. "Yeah, and that is…?"

"Oh come on! I'm here on a flute scholarship and even I know what that is!"

"Yeah, well I don't, so explain."

"He has shit wrong with him, low iron, you know, weak nails, fainting, seeing bright colours, and weak immune system… ect." She glared even more. "Now, as a fellow prefect, I gotta go see him, and I thought –you know, because I am kind and caring – I'd see if you cared! Now either come or don't come!" and she walked off.

I decided it wasn't worth the risk and trotted after one of the bossiest members of the Sound Four ever in existence. I don't' really believe her, I mean, why wouldn't he tell me about something this important? He said his iron tablets were just because he didn't eat enough red meat… in fact, really, now I think about it I've never really seen him eat anything at all…

Why wouldn't he tell me this? He was one of my best friends here, and as mean as this sounds I think I was one of his only ones. Or just the only one who crawled through vents and gave him near heart-attacks by dropping out of the ceiling unexpectedly.

We rounded the corner and Tayuya shoved open the door into an oh-so-familiar hospital room, and I scowl at the walls, which I seemed to know every inch of off by heart. And my eyes found the bed. Tayuya was right, he was there, sitting up and staring at the wall a lot like I had done.

I didn't speak, he didn't move, he knew exactly why I was disappointed. He hadn't told me. He had something seriously wrong with him and he hadn't even mentioned it. All the other prefects fussed over him, and I could tell it's not because they cared, but mainly because if he left nobody would really be able to replace him. Would they?

I sigh, and take a chair in to sit down and stair at the wall with him. He said nothing, the sound four argued over various things like who'd take his shift on hall duty and all that jazz, I just sat. And stared.

Why? Something so important, he didn't tell me. Did he think I wouldn't like him if he had a terminal illness?

People left, Tayuya looked at us both, and then shrugged. "You staying here, Takaski?"

I look up, surprised, not used to being called by my last name. "Wha- oh, yeah…" She nodded curtly, and then left.

Silence.

"Kimimaro I don't know what-"

His head shot up, the cold glare I saw on his face was so familiar, mainly because it was what he used on every other person. But not me. Never on me… until now. "What? What to _say_? What to _think_? What to _do_?" he spat out. "Here's some advice, do what everybody else does and part in the halls when they see me coming, as if I need a clear path, or they'll get some disease from me."

"No… I was thinking 'Kimimaro, I don't know what the hell you do to get so damn unlucky.'" His face softens a bit, and I smile. "Sorry I came so late, I mean, I was in bed with a hot water bottle, like, I was gonna hit the hay and then Miss bossy comes bursting in with this crazy theory about you have Bone deficiency Anemia." I shrug.

He sighs. "I didn't tell you."

I nod. "I noticed."

"I was afraid you'd just treat me like everybody else does, you don't understand how good it was to have somebody who didn't mind crushing me and or pushing me or falling from the ceiling and scaring me half to death. I've never had that before…"

I swallow hard, and I wish to god I didn't know, because I'm human, and when a human cares for something I can't help but change what I do for the one who is cared for's favour. "Sorry."

"For what?"

"For knowing,"

"So you'll be like the others now, and just treat me like breakable expensive china?"

I shake my head. "Nah, I'll still drop from the ceiling and scare the living daylights outta you, but I'm still sorry."

He nods. "Accepted." He still wasn't looking at me.

"How long'll you be in here?" I ask.

"This is only a minor one… a few years back I nearly died because I caught some virus and low immune system made that twice as bad. I was here for one week before I was transferred to an actual hospital."

I wince. "So, four, five days at most."

"I'll be out tomorrow… I just, well, I fainted. So they make me stay here over night for no reason."

"I'm damned sure there's a reason, you _fainted_!"

"Not you too! I'm used to this, it's happened before this! I can handle it!"

I sigh. "Okay, but whenever you need my help, call me."

He glares. "I won't need too."

"I sure hope so."

And so I hopped into bed, and sighed. I felt kinda washed out, too shocked and tired to really feel much. I keep thinking, 'It isn't as bad as I thought it would be.' But then really, it is. It's twice as bad. Now I know, and now every time he moves in the wrong way, or steps out of line, I'll stress. And he'll notice. And I know he'll hurt.

He had a good reason for not telling me. Is that why he talked to me? Will he not want to be my friend now, he didn't like _me_, and just the fact I didn't know?

But you know what really bugs me, I was so close, so close to just being able to pack up and leave. But I can't, Kimimaro relies on me too much right now, just let me stay until he's better... But you know what the hard thing is? I need to stay detached from Naruto until then. Because as soon as he apologises, I'm screwed, I need some excuse to not talk to him, avoid him, and ignore him as long as I can.

I need sleep.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Ohhh. THE PLOT THICKENS! Hehehhe. Wassup all? How are we all? Goooooood I hope! THANKSSOMUCHFORREVIEWING+READING!!ILOOVEEYOUSOOOMUUCHH!!**

**xOXOOXOXOXOXOXOOxoxooxoxXOXOXOXOOOOXOOOOOOOXXXXXXX **

**Luuuurvvveeee, to-love-is-to-lie **

**p.s. I lurrve this quote, it's one of my fave's, hope you liked it. **

**p.p.s. DOUGLAS ADAMS RULES! If you havnt read at least three of his books, DO SO NOW! They have some of the best lines ever written. He should be on the hollywood walk of fame. And the moon. That too. **


	35. Deal

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Chapter Thirty-Five: **

_Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays.__ - __Oscar Wilde_

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**29/5/18 - Sunday **

Highschoolers have a Pupil Free Day tomorrow, and so the Uni staff feel this is unfair and take the day off too (well, not day _off_, but day without kids). Which all of us Students have no problem with, either.

I was in bed for 4 hours, just staring at the rainy window pane. It's still raining heavily, which makes it harder to get out of bed. I'll wander over to see how Kimimaro is doing once I can be bothered to move.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**5:03 **

Kimimaro was let out at 9 in the morning, the nurse that told me was very happy about it. when I commented on this, she replied: "Well, before around February this year he fainted or had bad dizziness so often he'd be in about every fortnight, and stay for about three days, this was his first one in four months and he was only here overnight. We're all very proud here, the poor kid…" She shook her head sympathetically.

I nod, and thank her. "So he's in his dorm?" I ask as I walk out the door.

She nods. "Yes, just don't be too noisy or anything." She said.

"Why?"

"I don't want to see him back here for five months this time, I really hope for a recovery."

I nod, and power-walk briskly off towards Naruto's dorm. When I reach it I go to knock, in case the resident fatman was walking around in his week-old boxers –or worse! BREIFS!- and I walked in, but paused. I really didn't wanna look at Naruto right about now, so I quickly ran back to my dorm, and crawled in the vent, and slithered my way along until I found Kimimaro's room, where he was doing his homework, sheets sprawled out over the bedcovers.

"Psst! Kimimaro!" I whisper, he looks up, and his face brightens, then falls again, I know what's going through his head.

"Yes?" he says, rather coolly. My heart seems to fall a bit when I hear this, it makes me sad that I'll have to win back trust over something I really didn't mean to happen.

"Is Naruto there?"

He seems to get even angrier at this, and frowns. I know what's going through his head here too, he thinks I want to see him. "No." he says, and then promptly goes back to his work.

"Good." I say, and he looks up again and I'm already removing the vent-cover, his face seems happy again, and I smile. And drop down onto his bedside table, and then onto the floor. "Coz I'd rather now run into him now."

"Why? What'd you plant in his bed this time?" Kimimaro asks, raising his eyebrows, it's never really occurred to him that we could fight, like _actually_ fight, and not just argue as we always do.

I shake my head. "Nothing. We had an argument."

This time, what I read on his face was a surprise. It was a touch of triumph. "Really? What happened?" he was really interested this time.

With a little doubt, I launch into my story, but censored, so he doesn't really know everything. "When we were visiting our friends I decided to go have a check out on my old house, and didn't tell Naruto-all-mighty, and so he threw a fit and…" I continue on with the story, and how Sakura and Kakashi and Iruka-Sensei had been so doubtful about my ability to look after myself.

I feel Kimimaro let down all the coldness he's held against me so far. "I know how you feel."

"I can tell." I say. "It must suck."

He nods. "It does." Then pauses, "So when are you talking to Naruto again?"

"When is he talking to me again? Once I know that, about two months later." I glare at the wall. "Depending on how much he grovels and says sorry."

Kimimaro smiles. "So you're stuck with me for company then?"

"I still have Sasuke." I muse. "But yeah, basically. Poor you." I grin at him.

"I don't think so; Naruto will realize what he's missing out on soon enough."

I slide onto the bed next to him, looking over his shoulder to the work he's doing. "What's this?"

"Medicine study, mainly on bone matter."

"I thought you'd want to follow in your idol's footsteps and rape small children?" I say, eyeing his bone notes.

He glares, but he'd gotten used to my remarks about Orochimaru-Sensei and my dislike of him for 'giving Sasuke a better future.' "This is the only school I'd like to teach at, and he runs it. He gets to pick the next principal. And he's made it clear I'm not it."

I stop in my tracks of leafing through his medical manual, grimacing at the detailed disgusting diagrams. "Ew, these are really gross- what!? Wait, you _tried_?"

He nods. "He's always looking for an 'heir', I tried, and I wanted to help people as he helped me. But he said he didn't want somebody in my 'condition.'"

I glare. "You know, that's minus another 50 points, he is now on something around negative 452 trillion on my liking-scale. Along with that kid who used to laugh at me when I fell in puddles, he is in the top five of people I would like to see dead."

"Isn't that a little harsh for somebody who just laughed at you falling in puddles?"

"Oh no, you weren't there. You wouldn't understand. I was possibly the only senior in the history of Konoha-High to be laughed and teased by a freshman." I glare at the imaginary kid.

Kimimaro laughs, and I'm glad to hear something familiar again, not just the distrustful tones in Sakura or Naruto's voice. Something happy, something I was good at doing, making people laugh.

"You liked High-school?"

"I _loved_ it for six months, four days, nineteen hours and, just a guess, thirty minutes." I say quietly. That was the exact time Gaara first spoke to me, to the last time he did.

Kimimaro looks at me intently; he knows that tone of voice now. He knows that 'mysterious past' voice. And every time he hears it he perks up and encourages me to go on, but I never do. It hurts too much to say it in my head; god knows how much it'd kill to say it out loud.

Somehow, the way I knew the exact time, as if I'd counted the minutes I'd had with him, hurt more then seeing my house again. I remember the last time, he had a black eye, I'd run into the water-tank trying to break into his house. There was a look in his eyes, I'd walked away, how could I have walked away? Why in fucking hell did I walk away?

And the first time, not counting when his sister had asked me where 'the usual places' were. It was in Blodge, we were dissecting chicken breasts. Jiraiya had said

Breast' in that creepy way that made the whole class shuffle our desks back.

_Gaara sighed, and plucked the knife from my hands. "You have to cut side-ways, other wise you'll cut right through the part we're meant to be looking at." _

_I blink at him, and he looked up, raising an eyebrow. "You talk?" I ask._

_"I was wondering the same question about you." he told me, voice bland. I smile, and shrug, we continued on with our usual silence_

After that I asked if I could borrow his scissors, I remember. And then Kipper ran away and abandoned me. I wonder where he is…

I seemed to wake up, and noticed I was crying, my face went red in embarrassment, Kimimaro said nothing, but edged the tissue box my way, I took one and muttered a wet 'sorry', he shrugged.

"Promise you'll tell me some day?" He asked, looking at me in that same longing way, as if he wanted to know every secret I ever knew, had, or told.

I smile, "Only if you promise to do the same."

He smiles back. "Deal." And we shake hands.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:04 **

I feel kinda weird, like I've forgotten something. Oh well. Nighty Night.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Monday 29/5/18 – 8:17am**

I know what I'd 'forgotten'! SASUKE! I haven't seen him! Let's hope Naruto hasn't totally gotten to him yet, having breakkie, I actually saw Tayuya in the dorm this morning, usually she is back late, up early, on social and official sound-four business, they actually run this school more then teachers. They monitor and control all social problems. It's like an evil dictatorship. Except I'm cool coz I have Kimimaro on my side.

I'll crawl to Sasuke's side of life once I've finished my toast.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Hello Alllll!! **

**Hmmm… What music inspired me? I never really thought about this… Hmmm…**

**The Postal Service, old band but still awesome. (Especially the tracks 'The District Sleeps Alone Tonight', 'We Will Become Silhouettes' and 'Nothing Better')**

**'The Meeting Place' by The Last Shadow Puppets **

**'Losing You' by John Butler Trio (I saw them live, :D…but I always feel sorry for the 'trio' in john butler trio because nobody knows who they are… well, I don't anyhoo.) Also 'Caroline' by JBT **

**'Fidelity' by Regina Spektor **

**'Everything will be alright' and 'Andy, You're a star' by the Killers (From album Hot Fuss)**

**'Invincible' by Muse (Mmmm. I love that song.)**

**And then some old tunes eg. Mrs. Robinson by Simon + Garfunkel (Even if he was the nicest most perfect awesome guy in the entire world, I would never take his last name. Ever. What kind of disturbed parent gives their child the last name 'GARKFUNKEL!?'), Let it be by the Beatles (o course, who else?), and Wild World by Cat Stevens. **

**I never really noticed the music that inspired me, but that's all I can name off the top of my head! I'm sure there's more. But yer, most o those are quiet songs, since now I think of it heavy metal isn't Sora kinda music. **

**THANKSOMUCHFORREVEIWING!!ILOOVEEYOUU!! **

**Hehe, THANKSSS SOOOO MUUCHHH!! Really, I cannot ever EVER ever EVER convey my gratitude enough. Ever. **

**Luuuurve, To-Love-Is-To-Lie **

**P.S. if any of you know ALL those bands tell me. Because you'll be the first. Somebody in the world has to know all of them!! SOMEBODY!! **


	36. Last Day of Holidays

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

_Be life long or short, its completeness depends on what it was lived for. - David Starr Jordan_

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**12:24 **

I decided to take the legal route there and walk, I knocked on his door, and the creepy spider-man opened it. In my mind he got another 4 legs attached to his body, I quickly shook my head to get rid of that image.

"I'm here to see Sasuke, is he in?"

"Sorry, I'm not allowed to let girls into see Sasuke." He said, blandly. "His orders."

"No! I'm his friend, seriously!"

"Sure, you know how many people say that?"

"No! I am! Just let him see me!"

"Go away kid."

"Come on! Is he in or not?"

"Can't tell you."

I start to get pissed off, and remind myself to tell him to damn well tell his bouncer to let short blonde girls in. As a group of highschoolers walk by, they look at me sympathetically. "It's impossible, we've tried." They say.

"Exactly, so get lost." He went to shut the door, but I put my foot in it.

"Oi!" I say, outraged, until I then shout as loud as I could. "SASUKECOMEOUTHEREANDTELLSPIDDLYMANHERETOLETMEIN!" I scream.

I hear the shower that was running in the background stop, and he came out in only a towel, hair wet, I could seriously see girls melt around me, I glare at them and Sasuke says "She's allowed in." and the spiddly-man let's me in.

"Finally." I mutter at him.

Sasuke puts on jeans and (I hope) some form on undies on under his towel and chucks it back in the bathroom. "Why you here?"

"Why has Naruto been here the last day?"

"How'd you know?" he asks, putting the kettle on.

"It was just an educated guess."

He smiles. "I see."

"Whatcha think on the whole matter?" I ask, propping my head on my hands, and grabbing a stool to sit down on.

"He's gonna fall hard when you leave, oh, by the way, why _are_ you still here?"

"You heard about Kimimaro?"

"Oh… you're kidding me right!?" he says, glaring. "You lost your best chance ever at getting away to care for him!? He's in and out of hospital every fortnight!"

I glare. "Yeah, I know, but he hasn't been for the last four months or so, and you know what?"

"What?" Sasuke said, still glaring.

"He's my friend, and I can't leave him right now, knowing he's fragile."

"So is Naruto!"

"Yeah, but he has you, who does Kimimaro have? The school nurses?"

Sasuke sighs. "Fine, but as long as you know that you're and idiot. A selfless idiot."

"Not really…" I grin. "Not according to Naruto anyway, now, I need a reason to stay angry at him for a week or so, tell me everything he's been saying."

Sasuke laughs. "Only you'd say that, that just proves my point."

I roll my eyes and pour the boiled water into cups with coffee. "Who cares, now, spill!" I pause. "But first put a top on, your making me jealous. You have a nicer stomach then me."

Sasuke laughs again and pulls on a familiar navy-blue top. I stare. "That's awful familiar."

He looks down. "It was the first thing I saw."

"Why the hell does it still fit you?"

"No clue. Maybe it was too big then."

"Weird." I smile. "Now, go on, what'd Naruto say?" I hand coffee to him.

"Just about how selfish you are, and why you don't see how much you rely on him, and how you'll never realize how much he does to keep you safe… ect, ect."

I start to get angry, and launch into my bitch speech, by the sigh from Sasuke I can tell he's really heard enough about the whole thing from Naruto.

I spend the rest of the morning there, until I hear a 'Hey, let me in!' from the door, where Spiddly man is restraining somebody who's voice is too familiar for my liking. I sigh.

"Naruto." We both say, I grin.

"I better go, you know, I don't think you'd like a dead boyfriend." I drain the last bit of my second coffee and put the mug on the counter. "I hear bloodstains are hell to get out of carpets."

He glares. "Not so loud. And get out of here; I'm not supposed to be talking to you."

"I've done all of the talking anyway." I grin, and walk to his room, where I jump on the bedside table and scramble into the vent, just in time too, as I hear Naruto grumble.

"What took you so long? Seriously. And I'd think your bodyguard'd know who I am by now."

"Yeah, maybe."

"You want coffee?"

"Er, no…" I cover my mouth, trying not to laugh, Sasuke was never a coffee fan, and I'd just made him drink several cups of it.

"Sure?"

"Yes. Sure."

"Oh. You already had some." I heard him say, I assume that he was looking at my mug.

"Oh, yeah."

"I thought you didn't like coffee…"

"Er, I don't."

"Then why'd you drink some?"

"Um," he starts, I start throwing my fist into my mouth to cover my laughing. "Coz, er, um, I was, er… tired. And caffeine wakes you up."

"So does a morning jog, as you tell me in the morning?" In my mind I could see him eyeing off Sasuke in the 'what the hell is going on?' kinda way.

"I slept in. It's the last day of holidays! I can do what I want."

In my mind, I saw Naruto shrug, and I took a few deep breaths to stop my laughing, once I was sure I could control myself, I shuffled closer to the vent and put my ear to it.

"…Has Sora been 'round here?"

"Nah, knowing her she's still sleeping."

"Probably." He said, kinda bitterly.

"What's your problem anyway?"

"She ran away!"

"She's also a grown woman."

"She's nineteen. Not really a grown woman."

"She's also older then you."

"By a couple of months."

"Still, whatever." I could mentally see Sasuke shrug. "Just maybe you should let her live."

"She'd die."

I hear the tone of annoyance in Sasuke's voice. "No, Naruto, she wouldn't. She'd live quite a long happy fulfilling life, and you know the only reason you'd have a problem with it?"

"Why?"

"Because for that to happen, it wouldn't involve you." Sasuke snapped, I put my hands to my mouth again, but this time I wasn't laughing. No! Naruto and Sasuke couldn't fight! Naruto relying on Sasuke was the only hope I had that he wouldn't apologize until Kimimaro was well enough so I could leave! They couldn't fight! Nooo!

I felt like crashing my way down there, telling them both to stay out of my life and running off to go camp in Kimimaro's room and never leave until he's better.

But then I realized:

Naruto not staying out of my life _is_ the problem

Sasuke'd then have to explain why he lied about the four coffee cups there.

Kimimaro is in Naruto's dorm, so it'd be kinda pointless.

Instead I go out, turn right so I am above the living room and tap on the grates, then wriggle silently out of sight. Sasuke got the point, Naruto was suspicious.

"Was that…?"

"Dunno. I'll check, she can't get away that fast." And he wandered to his room, stood on the bedside table and took off the grate and looked in, I motioned for him to say nothing, and he nodded, before yelling. "Nothing. Musta been a rat."

And motions for me to scramble away. Naruto, at the bottom goes "You sure? Let me have a look." And I scramble faster, once I'm around the corner I stop to make things go quiet.

Once I hear their voices die down, I crawl off to my dorm, and jump down onto my bed. Mmmm. Bed.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**3:26**

Spent a while at Kimimaro's, after a nap. I don't wanna start school. But maybe it'll be good, maybe it'll be something to keep my mind off everything. I stopped by the office ladies, keeping my head down so they wouldn't recognise me and tell me to get stuffed because I wasn't switching classes again.

I changed to Kimimaro's classes, which he seemed glad about, even if his math is about 100 times harder, he said he'd help me. Sasuke said he'd change back to my Visual Arts if I wanted, at which I leaped on him and hugged him half to death, asking what other classes Naruto hadn't taken over.

"…Wonder how much weight you gain by eating this…" I say, looking at the back of the massive block of chocolate I had brought with me to Kimimaro's.

He shrugged. "Not like you have to worry, you're tiny."

"Thanks." I say bitterly. "I am still trying to grow, you know." I mutter.

"Like that'll help."

"Sure, if chocolate doesn't, what will?" I ask, rolling onto my back and looking up at him.

"Exercise, especially in the morning," he said promptly. "Releases growth hormones."

I glare "So that's how Sasuke has been getting so tall…" I mutter. "He used to be my height, you know."

Kimimaro raised an eyebrow in disbelief, he'd also grown used to the fact I knew Sasuke previously. "Sure."

"He was! He used to be short! But now he's a giant." I grumble and take more chocolate, but that was a passion Kimimaro didn't share with me, he preferred sticking to healthy foods. Kimimaro shook his head, muttering something under his breath, I sigh and sit up. "When do we get our test results?"

"Soon." Kimimaro was studying again, as always. I really don't think he does anything else.

"Do you ever get out?" I mutter, glaring at his textbooks.

"Sure."

"On _non_-Sound Four business?"

"Well…"

"Didn't think so…" I grumble, and sigh and lie back down; Kimimaro was no fun when he was studying.

"Why don't you go visit Sasuke?" He suggested, guessing my boredom.

"Naruto's there." I say glumly.

"Oh…How can you tell?"

"He's not here."

"Who says he's not somewhere else?"

"Like Sasuke's?"

"No, somewhere different…" he trailed off, frowning at a particular passage in the text and muttering 'really? So that's why he marked me wrong…'

"It's Naruto; he's either here, or at Sasuke's. No exceptions."

"Okay then."

"Come on! Do you _ever_ do anything fun?"

Kimimaro looked up and glared. "What do you call 'fun'?"

"You know, getting out, doing something exciting." I say, looking out the window at the rainy sky.

"I'm not allowed excitement, remember?" He said bitterly.

I sigh "Oh… yeah, that." And resign to staring once again out the window and eating more chocolate.

"Why don't you just go for a walk? You're obviously bored with me."

"Rather be with you bored then on my own having fun."

"That makes no sense." He said, looking up, confused.

"It does to me, and that's all that matters."

Kimimaro shakes his head and mutters "No sense… none at all…"

I sigh. "You know what?" I say, sitting up again. "We're going out. Anywhere. Have you ever seen the forests around here?"

"No. I haven't really been out of this place."

I nod then. "Well, let's go see them."

"Not allowed."

"Why?!" I cry, now getting annoyed. "Come on! They have to let you live!"

"Forests is private property, the school doesn't own it."

"Even better." I say firmly. "Come on, let's go!"

"It's raining."

"Who cares?"

"Me." He says, glaring, he'd been extra-short with me ever since I found out; I sigh and go back to staring out the window. His stare softens. "Sorry."

"Its fine… probably shouldn't get kicked out of here…" I say, and trace the patterns on the white and cream bedspread.

And that's how the afternoon passed, Kimimaro is afraid; it never really had occurred to me that he'd be scared. He's always been kinda indifferent to everything. He shouldn't be scared… Has he really been couped up for so long that he is afraid to go out? To take a risk or two? My mum always said 'Quality over Quantity.' And I think that applies to life too, I'd rather live a short, full life, then a long drawn-out fearful one.

I reach for another piece of chocolate, and find only one there. "You know, after I eat this I'll have eaten a full count of three family size blocks of chocolate in two days."

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Tuesday 30/5/18 – 7:38am**

I don't wannnaa lleaaaaaaarnnn

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**5:47pm**

Hahahaha. I think Kimimaro was determined to make today better then yesterday's boredom fest. In English I threw a paper aeroplane at the Sensei's over-large hair in a last attempt to tell her her fly was undone, but she ignored the big 'YOUR FLY'S UNDONE!' on the plane and instead sent me straight to detention.

Now, that is perfectly normal, but the fact Kimimaro spoke up and said "Sorry miss." Was what shocked me, I turned to him, stunned, and the Sensei grimaced.

"Well, you both go." She grumbled. And ripped off the slip and we both walked off. Private education sucks. It's like highschool, they can blackmail you to obey rules, coz if your kicked out there are scholarship students who would adore the chance to be here.

Kimimaro is kinda safe, when I asked him why the hell he did that, he said "I thought you might be bored in detention."

I smile and link my arm with his. "Saving fair lady from the terrors of boredom, what a hero!" I swoon, but he just keeps walking and I fall on the stairs.

With this I run after him and glare. "Hey, when a girl swoons, you catch her!" I reprimand him. "You deserve detention."

He laughed and bowed. "Sorry madam, care to try again?"

I curtsey with invisible skirts, since I only ever wear jeans. "Of course." and I fall backwards, but this time he catches me. I laugh. "I'm surprised you can hold me, after the three family sized chocolate blocks I consumed in the last days of holidays."

He pushed me back up to a standing position. "You're too short to really gain that much weight, that's probably why your hairs so thick."

And this, at the time, I found hilarious. Really, you had to be there, I had to sit down because I was laughing too much."

"HAHAHAHAHA I HAVE FAT HAIR!" I laugh, holding my belly. Kimimaro, since this was really the first time he'd sent me into a really huge laughing fit, seemed to be proud, but soon the novelty wore off, as always, and he just glared.

"Come on, up."

"FATTYHAIR! HAHAHAHAHA!"

"You know, she'll double our detention if _she_ gets there before us."

"Hahahahahahhahahaha!"

"Oh, come on! Seriously, it wasn't even that funny!" and he puts his arms under mine and lifts me up, dragging me along as I laugh until I cry.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**31/5/18 – Wednesday **

You know how nice it is to have Sasuke back in my VA? None of his Fangirls picked Visual Arts because none of them thought he would, so he considers it safe to talk to me. I had made him stop smiling at me in the halls as I was receiving death threats.

"…Your apple is weird." He says, raising his eyebrows at my page, still life was always a dodgy topic with both of us.

"…Your apple is too perfect." I reply "It doesn't look like that apple at all!"

"You sound like Tsnuade." He said, grimacing.

"I should be proud, then." I muttered as the art sensei told us to shoosh.

"Not really. Plus you'll need to get boob implants if you wanna be like her anyway." I gape at him. He shrugs. "What?"

I cover my chest. "I'm still developing, thank-you-very-much."

He raises his eyebrows at me. "_Still_?"

I nod and shuffle over and keep working, hurt. It's not my fault my boobs weren't as big as all his fanclub, if I was this short and had huge boobs I would look like an anorexic baby hooker. And that's not a look that's hot-right-now.

Eventually I got bored and forgave him; he raised his eyebrows at me again. "Accepted the truth yet?"

I went back into brooding-hen mode and shuffled back. Stupid Sasuke.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Helloooo!! Hope you like it, just to say, for all those who are going 'Buuut I wannna see Gaaarraa…..' YOU WILL! Patience, my child, patience…. Those who sit through my rambling on about things that don't really matter, shall be the ones who are rewarded most by a happy ending… **

**Not really, but I like to think of it that way. **

**LOOOOVEEEEEEEEEEEEE to-love-is-to-lie **

**p.s. I LOVE YOU FOR REVEWING!!**


	37. Results

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Chapter Thirty-Seven: **

**A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of. - Burt Bacharach**

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**3:45 **

But I am glad to have him back, Sasuke, really. Just only when he's nice. And not harsh.

…Or commenting on my bra-size.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Thursday 1/6/18 –NEW MONTH AHOY! **

It's so weird not having Naruto around; I kinda miss the annoying bratty whore bitch manslut clingy stupid person he is occasionally. I vented to Kimimaro's after curfew had gone, the curfew isn't really for us, but when it wasn't there they used to be able to have dorm parties and the stupid highschoolers complained, and now the highschoolies are in uni and regret ever complaining because curfew sucks.

Anyway, I did the usual drop-out-of-the-ceiling thing and he only jumps a bit. Not as fun as landing on Sasuke, who isn't used to it yet and screams like a girl.

"Hey bub." I say, and glare insanely at the textbook he had on his lap. "Seriously. Ditch the thing for one night, so you don't get super-high-amazing-best-high-distinction-with-honours on one little topic test? It's worth it for a night not having to think."

"Why would you not think?"

"Have you any idea how relaxing it is?" I say seriously.

"Er… no." but he sighed anyway and closed the book. I smile and make him move over.

"Shove love." And crawl under the blanket because these days it's FREEZING. "So, how were lessons today? I only had Art. Today is a good day." I say.

"Why do you call me 'love'?" he asks, ignoring my question.

I put my head sideways in confusion then smile "Becaushh I loveshh yoohh." I say in a baby-voice and pinch his cheek.

"Have you ever been in love?" he asks, he usually doesn't ask questions. Let along emotion-based ones.

I blush. "Well, no." I haven't _been_ in love. I _am_ in love. Is that a difference? I think so. Either way that was my excuse for lying. I don't know why I did. But I did.

"Really?"

"Yeah…"

"Don't lie."

"What? I'm no-"

"Naruto sleeptalks, you know."

I sit up, and look at him. "What does he say?"

"A few nights ago I got up for a drink and he was saying, loudly, 'I don't care if she loves you, you can't have her. I need her more.'" He fixed his gaze on me. "I figure you're the main 'her' in Naruto's life."

"Oh… Well, I don't know what he's on about." I shrug, but I knew he could tell I was lying again.

"And then last night, I woke up in the middle of the night and he said 'No, she can't leave. I need her here.'"

I frown. "I dunno." I look away and pretend to see the clock. "I better go to sleep."

Kimimaro knew he'd hit a subject. And I knew he wouldn't let it go easily. I also knew I had to stop Naruto sleeptalking, otherwise I'd be in deeeeeeeeeep trouble.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Friday- 2/6/18 **

"…He's staying, Sora."

"What?" I look up from the toast I'd stolen from the spiddly-man. And frown at Sasuke. "Who?"

"Naruto."

I nod, approving. "Good."

"Just warning you," he said, and buttered his own piece of toast, suddenly mine didn't taste so good, his tone of voice seemed to be a warning.

"What do you mean?" I say, putting the plate on the counter, still with toast on it.

"Think, Sora, if he's staying, who will he want with him?" he fixed his gaze on mine.

"No… No, no, no!" I say, shaking my head. "You have to stop him!" I say pleadingly.

"Just go now, Sora. What are you waiting for?"

"Kimimaro isn't healthy yet!"

"Sora! He won't ever be!"  
"He can be healthier then he is now!"

"Go, now Sora. Tonight." He insisted.

I shake my head. "I need more time."

"More time? You've have months and months of it. And you already lost your best chance, who says this isn't the second opportunity?"

"I-I I can't. Not yet."

"Why?"

"Kimimaro still needs me."

"He'll always need you, what then? A lot of people will always need you. You need to choose yourself for once." Sasuke said firmly.

"I can't." I insist.

"Yes, you can."

"No!" I say again, this time I slam my fist on the table, Sasuke goes quiet.

"What's the real reason, Sora? Are you too scared?" he said. "Didn't I tell you this?"

"I'm not scared!"

"Leaving is sometimes as hard as staying, if not harder." He put a hand on my shoulder. "But sometimes, you have too. Just to prove to yourself you can."

"I'm not leaving for that." I whisper. "And I don't need too yet." I repeat.

Sasuke shakes his head. "Whatever, Sora, but time _is_ running out, and you have Gaara to find."

It hurt to hear his name out loud, since I rarely spoke it myself, and when I did I made sure I was prepared. "I have plenty of time." I say again. And with that, I leave before the spiddly-man comes out and asks where the hell his toast went too.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Saturday 3/6/18 **

"_Leaving is just as hard, if not harder, then staying, Sora." _

_I shake my head. "No, being the one to watch somebody you love walk away is the harder, it kills." _

_Sasuke shook his head. "Just wait, walking away and knowing that the person watching feels that makes it twice as bad." _

He did say it. I can't say he didn't. But it's not like it applies to me, I could leave now, but Kimimaro needs me too much. Sometimes I have to put him infront of me. If I ignore Naruto it'll be fine.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Sunday 4/6/18 **

Naruto tried today, I ran. He said 'Sora!' while we were in the halls, but I dove into the small, but still tall, Sunday crowd of people and ran as fast as I could to the pool. I guess I thought he'd never find me there, there where I had fallen in, there where I'd promised before I'd never walk too near the edge.

I sat on the edge and ran my finger through the silky water. I wasn't allowed in here either, but since nobody ever came in here coz it smelt strongly of chlorine no teachers felt it necessary to patrol this area, it was kinda safe. In a not-supervised-or-safe kinda way.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Wednesday 7/6/18 **

We got our results back. I stood with Kimimaro in his room with my test papers face-down, having not looked at them, and then confiscated his to make sure he didn't either.

"Can I please look now?" he asked, rolling his eyes at me, I was so stressed out.

"Wait, wait until I'm composed." I say, I'd been tearing my hair out all day, and I was a mess.

"Whatever. Just hand them over." He as losing patience.

I take a deep breath and hand him his. "Okay, on three…" I say. "One… Two…. THREE!" close my eyes shut and I flip them over.

"What'd you get for Chemistry? Sor- Sora? Open your damn eyes!"

"I'm too scared."

"Seriously! It isn't that bad, here I'll look…" he went to take the papers but I freaked out and yelled insanely.

"NOYOUCAN'TLOOKBEFOREMEIPROBABLYFAILED!" and opened my eyes and blinked at the page. "Chem. 84." I say in disbelief

"I got 95." He said.

I waved a hand dismissively. "Course you get the super-high-distinction-with-amazing-honours-and-stuff…. But look! 84! How? I never listen in Chem!"

He shrugs. "You're smart?"

"Pfft. Sure." I say, waving a hand.

"Okay, next…" he says, and watches as I take a deep breath and close my eyes again, counting to five this time before flipping it over, he grumbles, snatches the test paper and shoves it in my face and says "Human Mind! 87!"

I freak out again. "NOICAN'THEARYOUYOURLYINGYOUDON'TEXISTAH!" and cover my ears humming "lalalalalallalalallal" as loud as I could.

He snaps and throws a pillow at me. "LOOK AT THE DAMN PAPER!" I sneak a look and relax.

"Didn't fail…" I breathe a sigh of relief.

He does too, and rolls his eyes. "Next?"

When I set myself up for flipping over the page he's had enough and glares, grabs my papers and yells: "VA 93, BIOLOGY 71, MATH… ohh…" he winces. "52"

I yell at him as he reads them and tackle him to the ground, we roll of the bed and I lunge for my test results. "NOOOOOGIVETHEMBACKOTHERWISEI'LLNEVERLIVE!! EVVERRR!!"

"They aren't that bad! You didn't fail! It was just a real close call for Math…"

"AHHHHDON'TSAYITTT!!"

"… I already did…"

"…Oh… Really?"

"Yeah."

"WELLGIMMEMYDAMNPAPERS!" I scream and snatch them back, glaring at him insanely and flicking through my test papers to make sure they were all there. "Wanna compare answers?" I ask, after I'd calmed down a bit.

He pales. "Er, I'll pass."

"Come on! I won't freak for every question! I promise!"

"I don't trust you." He says. "I'll look at mine _away_ from you!" he tells me, glaring, I pout.

"I munna go make coffee." I say and grumble off into the distance (aka kitchen).

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**HELLOOOO!! Sorry, I went and crippled myself with boiling water and was out of action for a few days… heh… anyway! I'm better now and wiser from the experience: Never carry a bowel of boiling water up the hall with an insane standard poodle in the house. **

**Don't as why I was carrying a bowl of boiling water. **

**Or why I let the dog in. **

**Or why she ran into me… **

**But either way I'm okay now and better then ever!! Hehehe. **

**Hope you liked it!! THANKSOMUCHFORREVEIWING!!thankkyouSOOOMUCH!!I LOVEEYOU!! (yes, YOU!!) **

**LOOOOVEEEEEELUURVVEELOOOVEELUUUVVVLOOVEloooveLOOVE To-LOOOOOOVE-is-to-lie**


	38. He Never Was

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Chapter Thirty-Eight: **

_Those who flee temptation generally leave a forwarding address.__Lane Olinghouse_

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**7:45pm**

After I'd finished freaking out over my results with Kimimaro, I raced to Sasuke's room, where the Spiddly-man opened the door.

"Sasuke in?"

"You can't see him, he sick of fangirls, get a life." He said, as if he was reciting it.

"Hey, spiddly-man, it's _me_." I say, glaring.

"Oh, _you_." he stepped aside and let me in, I grumble at him.

"Stupid spiddly-man… Grr…"

I should have really gone the vent-way, it was kinda stupid to walk in as if Naruto wasn't there. I wandered into Sasuke's room to find him on his bed with test papers everywhere.

"Hey, I beat you in Science…" he said, not looking up, I cock my head to one side.

"Huh?" his head snaps up.

"Sora!" he looks around frantically. "What are you doing here?!"

"I thought I'd visi- whoa!" I'm shoved into the cupboard and suddenly realize why I was in a cupboard; Naruto's voice comes into the room.

"Hey, who were you speaking too?"

"Myself, I beat you in science," he says smugly, I hear the doona rustle as he lies back on the bed in his usual sultry-Sasuke manner.

"What'd you get?"

"93."

"Damn… you did. I only got 74."

"That isn't too bad."

"_Too_ bad?" Naruto's voice goes kinda panicky. "It isn't bad, is it!? I thought it was good!"

"Well, it isn't your best…"

"I was proud of that! Is it really that bad? You know-"

"Okay, it'd good! It's fine, infact it's really good! You should be proud!" Sasuke says, giving in.

But it was too late for that, just like the mean comment about my bra-size, the seed of doubt had been planted and now Naruto wouldn't shut up. I knew him, Sasuke shoulda known better then to have said that. "You sure? Actually now I think of it, it isn't my best, is it? I hope this doesn't count for much because…" he trailed off into worried gibberish, and I stopped listening.

But then, then disaster struck. I needed to sneeze. It was dusty and smelt too much of Sasuke for me to have not needed too. I held my nose, and my eyes started to water insanely.

I took in a deep breath and held it for as long as I could, but it was no use. I had to sneeze. So I like, kinda somersaulted over in the small cupboard so my face was in the clothes, with my legs like cramped up bending unnaturally along the cupboard walls and attempted to sneeze as quietly as I could, which was really loud, naturally. Even muffled by clothes.

"What was that?"

"Er, I dunno."

"It came from the cupboard…"  
"Nah, I think it was the roof."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, roof." Sasuke said, I heard a bit of strain in his voice, and I lay there as still as I could, my face still planted in Sasuke's shirts which made it hard to breathe. I tried to quietly turn around, but ended up kicking the side of the cupboard, Sasuke, in answer, I think sacrificed his dignity and fell of the bed, because all I heard was a "Hey, what was th-" THUMP! "Ah! Sasuke! You alright?!"

Once I was semi-comfy again, I settled down and stared at the side of the cupboard, bored to bits, scratching naughts-and-crosses games on the wall of it with a sharp bobby pin. Of course, I won every time.

I really don't know how long I was sitting in that cupboard for, an hour, maybe two. But it was uncomfy and hot, and after a while really I think I fell asleep, because I remember Naruto talking about how he wants to change to the other Science and then after that Sasuke kicked me.

"Wha? Huh? HEY!" I say, rubbing my side. "What was that for?"

"You needed to be woken up."

"You coulda just you know, been nice and said 'hey, Sora, dear, wake up, time for school…' in that nice motherly kinda way." I glare. "But _nooooo_, it was all 'hey! Sora! WAKEUP!... KICK!'" I say in a harsh-imitation voice.

He rolls his eyes. "Whatever." And helps me up, I notice a bruise forming on his arm.

"How bad?" I say, motioning to it.

"The bruise? Hardly anything. The fact I fell off a bed 'accidentally', terrible." He grumbled.

I laugh. "Niiiiice, well, test of friendship passed. I owe you."

And after all that, I decided I'd overstayed, told him his cupboard was nice, but he should probably wash the top layer of clothing, and vented back, deciding going anywhere but classes the allowed way was dangerous from now on.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Sunday 11/5/18 **

"…Sora, go now."

"Wha?"

"Now. He wants to apologize. Go now, today. Go pack!"

"What? No… not now!"

"Sora are you an idiot!?"

"Yes. And I'm staying a little longer, I can avoid Naruto, pfft, who can't?"

"Not many people. He learnt from the master on finding and avoiding people."

"Off who?"

"You, Sora. He's better then you would think at finding people after spending 2 years with practically only you."

"Whatevs. Still can't beat me at avoiding people."

"Sora, go now! I won't stall for you any longer."

"Okay, I can take care of it myself. Don't worry your sheeny little head."

"…Sheeny?"

"Sheeny. It has a certain sheen to it today…."

"Whatever, look, either go now or don't go at all!"

"I'll go later! Just give me time!"

"…Sora, you've had time. You've had too much time, I'm not stalling him for you anymore. He'll go find you soon, and unless you take to sleeping in that damned vent of yours, he will find you."

"Sleeping in the vent…. Hmmm…"

"Sora!"

"Wha- oh… sorry, look, Sasuke, I will go when I go. It's my choice."

Sasuke rubs his temples in frustration, for the last two days he'd been telling me this, and for the last two days I'd said exactly the same thing, give or take a few words or compliments to his hair. He continues lecturing me, and I stare at his bangs. They look very sheeny today. Maybe he washes his hair with Mr. Sheen… Maybe I should try that some time.

"Sora, you don't see- Sora? Sora! Stop staring at my hair!" He snaps.

"Huh? Oh! Yes. Go on."

He swears under his breath and falls back onto the couch. "You're doomed. It's too late. You're stuck here. You just wait."

I roll my eyes. "Some faith you have in me, whatever, I'll go when I wanna go." I pat his sheeny head and go to walk out the door, decide it's too risky and then head for the vent.

"Sora!" he calls, I pause as I was standing on the bedside table, the same one that's in 90 of all dorms, because their interior designers are unimaginative. "Can I just warn you, when you _want_ to go, might be too late."

"Too late for what?"

"What if he's married? What if he already has a family, I mean, as totally unlikely as that is, what if it happens? You might arrive after you graduate from here, head off and realize he's got pneumonia and died."

"What if, what if, what if he's grown wings and flown to land-of-waves to join in raising money for the animal shelter? What do _you_ know anyway?" I snap.

"Probably more then you!" He said, glaring, we were both getting angry now.

"Sure! As if, you hardly ever knew him! The only time you two were even close was when he nearly broke your face!"

This was a blow to Sasuke's pride, I saw him flinch inwardly. "And that was defending you, Sora, then he loved you, what now? What makes you even think he still does?"

"Nothing." I snap, and go to crawl into the vent.

"You can't be sure he's still yours, Sora." This was a quiet voice.

This hurts. I glare at him and then turn to face the vent angrily. "He never was mine…" I say harshly, but still quiet, and clamber into the vent, fighting angry tears, I only got half way back before I had to stop and bury my head on my hands and try to stop the relentless, stinging tears.

No, he never was….

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**Tuesday 13/5/18 **

Sasuke isn't speaking to me either, except occasionally in VA when he mutters 'Packed your bags yet?' or 'You're an idiot' or 'You drew that grape wrong, it's more oval shaped.'

But one thing he was right about was Naruto, and he was knocking on my dorm room door, but he never really suspected that 90 of the time I was next door to him; I'd taken to using some kind of charade/sign-language combo to talking to Kimimaro, so Naruto wouldn't hear my voice, which Kim always found amusing.

I'd told Tayuya that I'd do all the dishes all the time if she answered the door all the time, which she gave me a weird look, agreed because nobody likes doing dishes and laughed muttering 'sucker.' But it's not really an inconvenience for her because 98 of the time the people at the door are for her anyway.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Wednesday 21/5/18 **

Sorry haven't written for a while, been totally insanely on my guard 24/7 and have got no sleep whatsoever because I have to make sure I'm asleep after Naruto, which involved crawling to his side of the building, putting my ear to a door 3 walls down from his room (for safety reasons, I don't want a burst eardrum) and listening for his snoring.

It's weird to think that our roll has totally switched, the office ladies are angry at me again, but because I get reluctant updates on what classes Naruto is in from him. It feels as if life is going around in circles, but it's my turn to play Sasuke.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Friday 23/5/18 **

"Sora, get some sleep."

"Mrrggfhh…"

"That just proves my point, you need it."

"Mrrhhhpphhh…"

"Seriously. You do."

My head had flopped onto Kimimaro's shoulder, who was looking at me like I would explode at any minute. "Noooo I don't." I mutter, trying to roll over but realizing I couldn't for three reasons:

A) I was in English

B) I wasn't in a bed, I was in a chair. And,

C) If I did so, I would roll straight into the garbage can.

Kimimaro hoists me up into a sitting position again. "Sleep. No! Not now, later!"

"But later Naruto'll find me… and then I'll never get away… ever…" I mutter, and snuggle into his shoulder, which was really surprisingly comfy.

"Don't know where you'd be getting away to in this place," Kimimaro rolled his

eyes, thinking I was just rambling on insanely, like a sleep-deprived zombie. "But you need sleep or you won't remember any of this."

"Mrrghhh…"

He sighed. "Not like you'd remember it anyway…"

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**HELLOO ALLL!! Hope you liked it!! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIWING IT MEANS SO MUCH I LOVE YOU SOOOOO MUUCHHH!! **

**Really, I do. You have NO IDEA. I love you SOOO MUCH! I'd date you all if I could. (But I'd get jealous)**

**Looooveee, to-love-is-to-lie. **


	39. Deliriousness

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Chapter Thirty-Nine: **

_You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.__- __Colette_

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**4:59 **

When I woke up, I was in Kimimaro's room, I really realized it by the kinda dusty-book-smell that belonged to Kimimaro before I had seen the differences. Them mainly being where I put my clock on the table and the number of books on said table, seeing as every room in this damned place is the same.

"We had to ditch Human Mind." he said, looking at me. "You were wayyy to tired. Don't know if you remember this, but you fell asleep in your lunch."

I wipe my hands along my cheeks. And sigh. "Don't remember it, but damn do I feel it… why? Why mash potato?" I groan and roll back over.

"This really isn't healthy, Sora."

"Like you can speak, you're like the best Mr. unhealthy of the world."

"That made next to no sense." He sighed. "But I get your point."

"Mrrhhpphgg." My amazingly sharp and witty found it was trapped as my face was in the pillow, and was too lazy to fight it's way out, so just stayed there.

"And that made no sense _at all_…" he sighed again. "Look, tomorrow you stay here, and you sleep. I really don't care if it's Friday, but that way if you sleep all through Friday and Saturday and most of Sunday you'll be semi-functional for Monday." He said, sighing.

At this, I sit up. "Where will you sleep?"

"The couch."

"NOOO!" I say.

"No, its okay, I can manage."

I wave a hand. "Yeah, I know _that_, but it'll be way too obvious!"

"Of what?"

"Of Naruto! He can't find me!"

"No, _to_ Naruto, _to_." He corrected. "And I really think your taking this too far."

I shake my head. "No, I'm not. I'll sleep in the vent."

This, it seems, scares Kimimaro to bits and he shakes his head vigorously and pales. "How could you!? No! No, no, no, no!" He looked quite worried and dishevelled, so for his personal safety, I agreed.

"Okay, okay…. Fine, but just keep a mattress in here and I'll sleep on that." I say.

He sighed. "Okay, but how the hell do you plan to get your mattress here?"

I grin. "Elementary, my dear Kimimaro."

"I really don't like that look on your face…."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Minus T 1100 hours. God knows what that means, but it sounds cool. (Aka, it's 9:00) **

I think it was only two factors that let us manage to squish a whole mattress through a venting system and that was:

1) The poor quality of the Mattresses, so they bend like jelly

2) The poor quality of the vents, so they bend like jelly

And with these two advantages, we got a full mattress into Kimimaro's room. I do consider this a life achievement though, and am very proud, I only had one problem on the way there were it got stuck around half way, and I had to practically jump on it and push foreword to get it to move.

I looked quite proudly at the now dirty, disfigured mattress. And beam "On my gravestone, you need to write 'only living person to have fitted an entire mattress through the venting system in Sound School & College for Gifted &High Achieving Students.'"

He laughs. "You realize paying to have the school name alone on that gravestone would cost a fortune." He grinned "But hopefully I won't have too."

"Nah, the way I'm going with my exotic sports and all I think my life expectancy is 23 max." I smile. "And plus, you can start one of those charity concerts in my honour, you know, like _Live_ _Aid_, except call it Sora's Gravestone and Life Achievement Aid."

"Okay, I will." He said, smiling.

I grin and actually see the mattress. "Hey, got any clean sheets? This thing is pretty disgusting…"

"Nah, I don't, you'll have to go back and get yours."

I nod, and crawl along to my room, and grab my sheets and blankets and jump into the vent, and too my distress I see something I mustn't have noticed on the way there, the fact that there was a huge mattress-shaped dent in the stupid jelly-like vents, it also seemed to have too deeper patches where my knee's had gone into it to get it to move when it was stuck. I go pale, and touch the weak spot in the metal and wince as it felt dangerously unstable. I carefully reach all the way over it and continue on, checking for other weak spots.

I found no other major ones, but that bad one had looked pretty weak, I decide not to tell Kimimaro because he'd freak at my damaging of school property, and put sheets on and practically immediately fall asleep, finding sleep is the best way to avoid telling one's friend that they nearly destroyed a vent.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:00pm **

Moral of Story: When you want to move a mattress through a vent, don't jump on it, instead grease it up with butter or hair gel.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:04 **

Or Grease. That is good for greasing, so I hear.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**11:07 **

Not the movie, the ugly greasy stuff… though Olivia Newton-John was pretty greasy in some scenes.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:10 **

Infact, screw the ugly greasy grease, just stick Olivia Newton-John under the mattress and it'll slip slide right outta that vent.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

**11:12 **

Mainly because it's a well known fact mattresses are very much afraid of multi-talented people, like actresses who sing. Or singers who act, so sticking Oliva Newton-John under it should work.

If you can't find any available cans of Olivia Newton-John at your local hardware store, then resort to actual grease, you know, the greasy stuff.

…. If you can't find that, then go for hair gel.

… And if that doest wanna go into a vent, _then_ you jump on it.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**11:19 **

Man I'm tired… maybe I should sleep…

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4:18pm **

My god. I have never, ever, ever, ever, EVER slept in that late!

Wow, did I have anything to drink last night?

Conclusion: Not sleeping for a week and 3 days has the same effect as 4 glasses of sake.

This does kinda prove that alcohol isn't good for you, but I guess it explains the hangovers. Because that must be what alcohol's made of, people who haven't slept for a week and 2 days.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**4:20 **

HOLYSHIT I'M NEVER DRINKING EVER AGAIN! YUCKK!! I JUST REALIZED WHAT I WROTE! OHH MYY GOODD!! YUCKK!! ALCOHOL IS MADE OUT OF PEOPLE!! AHHH!! EWWWW!! IT ALL MAKES SENSE! Why beer tastes so foul, why wine is … is… RED! AHHHHHH!!

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4:24 **

I need to warn Shika and Sakura!

…. Especially Kakashi, now I think of it… maybe that's why he's so tall, because he's drunk so many sleepy people. Ewwww.

I have made a very important and shocking discovery, MUST TELL THE WORLD!

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**5:00 **

I ran straight into the man with 8-going-on-9 chins, who didn't seem really that happy to see a girl run screaming from Kimimaro's room yelling "HOLYSHIT SAKE IS MADE OUT OF REALLY REALLY TIRED PEOPLE!"

"What the hell are you on about?" he hurricaned, because when he talks he like breathes out more carbon dioxide then 40 cows combined. And that turns into a hurricane… somewhere over in the land-of-waves. So it makes sense.

"Wouldn't you like to know…" I mutter, glaring and running off out the door and through the hallway, getting to the intersection and realizing everyone was mainly gone because of the weekend and that most of the people who were left were too depressed because they were staying here or too tired to listen, so instead I switched to grabbing a crimson haired girl and yelling "DON'T EVER DRINK AGAIN! IT'S MADE OUT OF PEOPLE!"

Which she seemed to take literally, and went wide-eyed before diving out the nearest exist and made what I interpreted to be throwing-up sounds. From her throwing up.

I decide to run off before she questions me about it because people who have thrown up smell really, really bad.

So after writing a quick note to Shika and Sakura that read:

_'Dear Shika and Sakura, _

_DON'T EVER DRINK ALCOHOL EVER AGAIN! I HAVE MADE A SHOCKING AND DISGUSTING REVELATION! WHY IS WINE RED? WHY ARE HANGOVERS VERY MUCH LIKE STAYING AWAKE FOR A WEEK AND 3 DAYS? BECAUSE THEY ARE MADE OF PEOPLE WHO ARE REALLY, REALLY, REALLY TIRED!! _

_WARN THE OTHERS!! _

_Lots of love, _

_Sora'_

I knew Naruto'd find it and after some hesitation mail it, so, feeling I have completed a job I went back to Kimimaro's room and got back into bed.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**5:10 **

You know, I think I need more sleep….

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Hahaha, how are we all? Hope we're all good. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! WOOOO!! THANKS FOR REVEIWINGGGG!! THANKS SO MUUCH!! REALLY, THANKSS!! **

**Hope you all liked it, I know it's kinda short, sorry!! Will update longer next time, PROMISE!! **

**Love you, **

**To-love-is-to-lie **

**P.s. I really love this quote, somehow, me and it connect. :P**


	40. Turning Tides

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**Chapter Forty:**

_Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists? -Kelvin Throop III_

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**Saturday - 25/5/18 **

"…Hey, Jirobo said something about you yelling about how Sake is made out of people…" Kimimaro said, after I had woken up sometime in the afternoon, feeling a lot saner and better.

"Wha?" I say, confused, then I remembered. "Ohhh. Yes! I made a shocking discovery."

Kimimaro rolled his eyes. "So I heard."

"Well, you see, since a hangover is like spending…erm, a ….erm…." I pause. "You know, I think I was just really, really, really, deliriously tired."

"That's what I figured."

"Well, whatever I was thinking, that insane red-head believed it."

"Who?"

"Some year 9 girl I think, judging by height, but I think anything over year 8 is taller then me."

"Elisa." He sighed. "Thanks a lot."

"What?"

"She is very… gullible, and has an over-active imagination."

"I like her."

"I'm sure you would… anyway, point being earlier this year some other girl in dorm 24 told her the school was breeding mutants in the vents because she heard noises…. In the… vents… noises…" he turned to face me, with a very pissed off look on his face, I pretend to fix my pillow and look at him innocently "Oh god Sora, you know how much you've screwed up this girls life?" he said, glaring at me.

"Er, not really." I beam at him.

He sits down and rubs his temples, why do people even do that? Rub their temples… is it relaxing or something? He sighs. "Her friend told her the 'noises' were mutants in the vents…"

I think over this. "That's believable, I mean, if I saw me there I'd think the same."

He rolls his eyes. "Anyway, she had to sleep in the nurse's room for two weeks because she was so scared, and then of course the year 7's freaked out because if a year 9 girl was scared they should be too."

"Wow, have I been influential." I said brightly.

"Very." He muttered dryly, and handed me a cup that smelt of coffee.

I could have kissed him; there was nothing I felt like better then a nice cup of coffee. I smile blissfully. "I love you, you and your awesome coffee-making skills." It still didn't beat Shika's coffee, but it was damn good. What's it with people who don't drink coffee making the best coffee? Weird.

"Okay, but I can tell you I'll make sure you're on assistant nurse duty –I can rig these things- if she ends up in the nurse room because she's afraid somebody will … erm…."

"Come pour sake on her?" I offer.

"Yes, that…" he said, looking confused.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Monday – 27/5/18 **

It's quite hard avoiding Naruto, I can say chasing is much easier then hiding in a place like this, but the sad thing is I'm safest in the room next to his. Where a) he's too scared to look because he find Kimimaro creepy (god knows why, he's just unnaturally tall, cold and evil looking) and b) he wouldn't ever think I'd stay because I'd be too close. Hahahhaha. I am ze genius of the century.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Thursday 30/5/18 **

Woweee. This is getting close, haven't written all week because of avoiding Naruto, the little blonde pest he is.

And so the chase is on. He nearly caught me with Kimimaro in the halls, until I had dived into a patch of other (slightly taller) year 10 blonde girls and yelled 'Oh my gawd, Sasuke Uchiha is SOOOOOO cute. I wanna date him and have passionate sex and babies!' until he decided it wasn't me and walked off, at which stage I was left with a whole lot of really, really confused girls, I grin at them, tell them thanks for the help and walk off to an equally confused Kimimaro, but I can handle that. A Mob of girls who share the same dream as I'd pretended to have, I couldn't stand.

As we walked off to electives, he gave me another weird look and I grinned, assured him I loved him more and would sooner have passionate sex and babies with the man-with-8-or-slightly-9-chins then Sasuke, for secret shocking reasons.

Then, once he'd gone my reassuring smile dropped and I decided I'd have to be late for Human Mind and ran off to go swallow a bar of soap and try to confess my sins to the paper-towel dispenser since it was the closed thing to a religion I had at the time.

Human Mind was relaxing as usual, but this time I actually listened.

"And now a classic philosophy question, do we really exist? How are we not somebody else's imagination? Are we all nothing but small furry creatures that I occasionally find in my extensive collection of nose hair from various other members the philosophy and English staff?"

Okay, kidding. I didn't listen. And maybe the first sentence was a little off, but I swear that second one is true!

My mind was elsewhere, when was I leaving? When _could_ I leave? A little longer… I mean, it wasn't like I was scared or anything. I can leave whenever I want, and I _do_ wanna leave… It's not like I don't. It's just I _can't_.

If that makes any sense.

Which it does.

… SHUTUP!

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:46 **

Aww, I'm sorry for yelling. I'm just tense because Naruto is everywhere at once.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Saturday 3/6/18 – NEW MONTH AHOY!! **

Still have to migrate to Kimimaro's after-hours to get sleep. When Tayuya asked where the hell my mattress was, I told her it was at the dry-cleaning.

She, being the music-flute type, and not the dry-cleaning type, believed this.

I munna go to Sasuke's, he always knows what to do. I just don't' always do it, you see.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**4:34 **

Sasuke handed me the coffee cup, glaring at his own. "Do I always have to drink this when you drink it? Can't you just have one, I hate coffee!" he muttered.

"Yeah, but I hate drinking alone." I shudder. "Not alcohol though, I'm off sake for life." I vow.

"Er, why? Not like you can handle many, according to Naruto."

I lean close to him and whisper "It's made out of tired people…" I say seriously.

He rolls his eyes. "That's what that insane mental-hospital genius keeps telling the rest of year nine, you know how much trouble the sound four has been going through to convince everyone alcohol is a perfectly safe drink?"

"Wow. Dead brain cells. Totally safe." I say sarcastically.

He shrugs. "Year nine can do what they want…"

"So what's so bad about not drinking then? And their year nine! _Underage_ man!"

He shrugs "Nothing bad about not drinking I guess… but damnit! Whoever started that stupid rumour is gonna get punched, I can tell you that." He glared at the 'invisible person' he imagined to be right next to me. I felt like saying 'hey, glare a bit to the right buddy and you'll be fine.' But decided I like my face the way it was.

I shrug. "Whatever, but drink your coffee." I say dismissively, trying to change the topic. "So, how's Naruto?"

"He knows I know."

"He knows you know about what?"

"What you know I know your gonna do." He said.

I pause "Okay, so he knows you know what I know you know I'm gonna do." I say, looking confused.

"He knows I know something he doesn't." he rephrased.

"Yeah… that's better." I say, shaking my head. "Maybe coffee isn't good for you."

"Yeah… maybe I shouldn't drink it."

"Nice try, it's full of anti-oxidants! Drink up, buddy!" I grin.

He rolls his eyes. "Caffeine isn't good for you."

I shrug. "You sound like Kimimaro."

"Whatever… anyway, he does know. He's getting information out of me little by little. You need to go!"

"Why are you still putting so much pressure on me?!"

"Because I know how hard it is and wished there was somebody there to do the same for me!"

"If there was, you wouldn't have gone." I say simply. "I know it."

"Pffft. As if!" he said, looking annoyed in his usual Sasuke-self.

I nod earnestly. "Yep. You wouldn't have gone. And I would be with who I wanna be with, and none of us would be here, buddy!" I say, glaring.

"He still would have gone, it wasn't any of our faults over why he left, and I think he still had business with Suna, Sora."

I square my jaw "Then I have business with Suna, too." I say firmly.

"You're just slow about getting there." He muttered.

I drain the rest of my coffee cup and shrug. "I'm off, seriously, I don't feel like being bullied again today." I mutter and go to pick up his most-likely still full coffee cup; I get a surprise when it's empty.

"Hm?" he asks, when I pause to stare intently at the cup, for any signs of hidden coffee I might have missed.

"You drank it." I say simply.

"Oh… er, yeah."

Then I get suspicious, you know, to anyone else Sasuke can lie from here to land-of-waves but to me and Naruto, he's a terrible liar. I look around and my eyes catch on a pot plant that's soil looked awful coffee-brown.

I sigh. "You could have just told me you didn't like it, gosh. Don't waste coffee." I pat his head and walk to the sink.

"Told you I didn't like it!? Told you I didn't-! I did! Several times! Don't waste- ergg. What's even the point!?" he muttered angrily and stalked off, I grin at the leftover coffee. "Told her I didn't- I did! Didn't like it… eh!" it's fun to see him flustered, since you only get that privilege like once a millennium, it's even more satisfying when it happens.

"You, my friend, are always a great source of entertainment." I say to it appreciably, and let myself out.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Sunday 4/6/18 **

I knew this'd happen. I have no allies. The gig I up. It's over, there is no way I can do this without Sasuke.

I went over to his to share a cup of coffee and steal his English homework, but found a trap. After innocently walking in and searching through his bag, he came in.

"Oh, Sora, here you are." He said, coming in and automatically putting the kettle on.

I smile brightly. "Hello my love! Have any idea where those English notes of yours are?"

"In the bedroom." He said, making the coffee, I nod and walk off to the room and find the book on the bed, obvious.

I grab it and flick through to find the notes I wanted, and frowned. They wernt here, I sigh and go to walk out, my head still buried in the book, my hand reaches for the doorknob, I twist and open, but find no open walkway to pass though and run into a body.

I look up. "Oh, sorry Sas- What?!" It was a blonde figure, I go pale, drop the book and slam the door, shoving a chair on the outside and dive for the vent, but find it covered in duct-tape. Dear lord…

I tried ripping at it, but they'd secured it, knowing I'd go for the vent.

"…Sora! We need to talk!" Naruto said, trying to make the door budge, I didn't say anything, and looked desperately for a route of escape, finding only the en-suit bathroom and nothing else, there was a vent in the bathroom but it was half my size and up high.

I sighed, and now here it was, not flight or fight, fight or hide, and I chose hide like I'd been doing for so long, and dived under the bed as they opened the door and came in, they automatically looked to the vent to see if I had gotten out, but I heard their sigh of relief as the tape was still there. Damndamndamndamndamn. I

I edge to one side, cringing at the crap under the bed, eww… tissues. After they both went to check in the en-suit, I made a run for it, and quietly raced out the door and back to my room, panting.

Great, so now I'm alone in this. Sasuke thinks that by increasing pressure I'll leave… well I'll show him! I'm not being _forced_ out of anywhere.

Now, I plan to go do some spying. As nice friend would in this sort of situation.

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**Hello All! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING!! THANKS. SO. MUCH. I. LOVE. YOU! YES. YOU. YOU. RIGHT. THERE. THANKS. A LOT. :D. Wooo. Chappy 40. my story is middle-aged now. It might have a mid-life crisis and not want to live anymore or something. Either that or take up an extream sport. Maybe bungee jumping. **

**Special thanks thanks thanks to the hilarious reviewers, I really love to hear from you all, your are all comic geniuses and make me laugh on a 2-to-3 minute basis. **

**Also Thanks to Ink'd Fairy Wings, who's insane review made me laugh like a mad thing. and to Adecge, for writing possibly THE longest review I have ever seen that wasn't a flame. I think you should win a Grammy for that one. Or at least have your face sculpted into the moon forever. Because you deserve it. **

**Also to Celiatsu, baka hanyou raevyn, jjayno1 and MsLcloud just for your constant support. CONSTANTLY. It's great. **

**THANKKSS. Love, To-love-is-to-lie. **


	41. No more Adventures

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**Forty-One: **

_Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.__ - __Erica Jong_

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**6:52**

I had crawled though the vent with amazing skill and stealth, so they didn't hear me, and lay over the still duct-taped vent listening.

"…Don't give up, Naruto." Sasuke said encouragingly. I glared at him through the slits in the duct-tape insanely. Giving up? _Don't_ give up? Giving up is what I want damnit!

"She obviously doesn't want to know me anymore, Sasuke, what's the point?"

"Lots is the point, she's your best friend, it's worth chasing."

"Was, was my best friend."

"Is." He repeated and I glared more and thought about spitting on him, but decided against it since Sasuke is pretty thin and wiry and could probably just fit in here and get me down.

"Was," Naruto countered again and sighed. "You know, I reall-"

"Naruto! Getta grip for Christs sake! She is a short, feisty, albeit, but also quite unlucky 19 year old girl, why can't you just walk on into her dorm and say 'hey, can I talk?'"

"Because… uh… um…."

"Exactly, why not go try now?"

Naruto inhaled a deep breath and then let it out. "You're right! I can do this, I will go now!" and with that, he marched out the door and out of my view from the duct-taped vent.

Once I heard the door slam shut from him leaving, I decided to slowly make my way back, just to see his reaction when I wasn't there, but instead heard a voice calling me.

"Sora?"

I didn't answer.

"Sora, I know your there."

_No you don't… _

"I do. Your there, I could hear you glaring."

_Pfft. As if. _

"So at least come over to the duct-tape."

I did this, mainly out of curiosity.

"I'm hoping you understand, I warned you I wasn't covering for you any longer. You're running a risk, one I hope you understand well enough to leave soon."

_I will, soon. _

"Bye, Sora, see you eventually."

_Bye, Sasuke, see you _soon_, too. _

And with this, I shuffled back to my dorm just in time to hear Tayuya tell Naruto I wasn't there, and to check somewhere else. I grin as I swing down onto my bed and listen at the corner.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I can check again, if you want…" she said, angry at Naruto's disbelief.

"Can I check?"

"No! I'm not letting a strange boy into her dorm-room!" Now, usually I would have stayed in the vent until I was sure he was gone, but I know Tayuya, and once she's angry she's a stubborn biarch who won't give him what he wants on purpose. Naruto had no hope.

"Please? Come on! Just one loo-"

"No! Now piss off before I call Jirobo!" she snapped and slammed the door, huffing, and went back to her room.

When I was sure Naruto would have left, I went into the living room and open and shut the door to feign me coming in, she called from her room.

"Sorano! That blonde kid came, asking for you." she yelled. "He's annoying, tell him not to come back."

I muffle a laugh. "Okay," I say dismissively, knowing all this already, and put the kettle on. Everything was too quiet, too uneventful. I don't know why, but when you are winning by too much the game's not fun anymore.

It's always the best to be ahead by only one-or-two, that way the prospect of losing is still there, the opposition is still fighting and you can still plan things. Even losing is better then winning by too much. When you're losing you still plan and fight too, but winning by lots is no fun. At all.

Though it is relaxing, I guess…

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Thursday 8/6/18**

Dear lord! We were all herded into the school hall today, all us Collegers, and seated, Snake-Rapist-sensei looked livid, and approached the stand almost shaking with anger.

"Seniors, we appear to have a problem, I am quite sorry to tell you a second year student has been very severely hurt – and is now in hospital- at one of your, I think, fault. You see, it appears somebody has thrown something in the venting system and it's damaged one of the pipes, this fell on the boy and he is now in intensive care after it landed on his head." he surveyed the hall, some looking sheepish, some looking confused others just looking at the sheepish and confused ones to figure out who did it, I just looked down.

Oh no… how hurt was he? This was exactly like the time… the time… I broke that curtain rail… except this is extreme. There was only one course of action from now on, no more vent-travelling, because now all noises would be checked out for sure. It was all too risky. Errg. Why must I always break and hurt people through my illegal forms of travel?

Orochimaru kept talking as I kept thinking, and eventually he stopped, glared around the students once more and left the stand, at once chatter broke out, and then the next speaker got on the step and hushed the crowd, I noticed with shock it was Kimimaro and Kabuto. Kabuto adjusted his glasses and cleared his throat.

"From now on, any noise, or student found putting things in vents results in immediate expulsion. This is too dangerous." He continued speaking too, but my eyes were only on Kimimaro, whose face was laced with cry-humour as his eyes fixed on mine, he shook his head slightly and went back to helping with Kabuto's speech.

Well, that's it, isn't it? My ad_vent_ures are over. Now that I'll be kicked out if I'm found there … well, not like I wouldn't have been anyway. Maybe I shouldn't have tried to fit a mattress in there.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

**8:09 **

"…You could have told me! I would have got it fixed." Kimimaro reprimanded me when I went – the legal way- to see him.

"Yeeah….. But you would have freaked."

"Better then giving that poor guy a concussion. You know what that insane Elise girl is saying now? She's saying the giant mutants in the vents are going to invade soon, she's back sleeping in the nurse's office!" he glared.

"I'm sorry! I am, I shouldn't have fit a whole mattress into the vent, and you can take back that promise of the whole pro gravestone." I pout.

He sees I was quite cut about losing my gravestone, so he sighed, and shuffled over to sit close to me. "It's okay, it'll just be better now. It'll say 'only living person to have fitted an entire mattress through the venting system in Sound School & College for Gifted & High Achieving Students and given somebody a concussion without getting caught.'" He said.

I laugh and hug him, and for once, he hugged me back, which was strange. But nice, very nice. He was warm and comfy, unlike hugging Sasuke, which is like hugging a brick because he is so muscly and fit and if you hit him it'll break your hand in pieces. Kimimaro was just right, not absolutely so amazingly solid you die if you tackle them, but not fat like the man with 8-nearly-9-chins.

I close my eyes and lean against him, mmm… sleepy… He moves and lays me down on the bed. "Your tired after a long day of giving people concussions, go to sleep." He said, and smiled. And so I did, and I slept for a long while, and then later him and me snuck the mattress back into my dorm with skill and precision.

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**Friday 9/6/18 **

You know what I just realized? Naruto will know I can't use the vents anymore. I've lost, there is no way I can avoid him now, without my vents.

It's over. I've lost.

The little voice that sounds like Sasuke piped up here '_Hey, so that means it's the time to leave!_'

No! Go away!

_'Hey, this is your last chance, can't you see that?' _

No, I can't.

'_Loser_.' And I smothered it by humming 'girls just wanna have fun' until it got too annoyed and left.

It's over, why can't it see that? He'll find me, but I'll just have to leave after he knows I'm here. It's his hurt, not mine. He caused it, he didn't have too.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**2:11 **

Human mind. Can't concentrate. Supposed to be taking notes. All this time, did I really think I'd win? It was all the fact I could fit in a vent and he couldn't.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**3:34 **

It's like walking to my own funeral.

… No, more like walking to Naruto's. He'll be twice as cut as I will be, I'm being normal now. No after-hours travel, it's just a matter of time until he finds me.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Sunday 11/6/18 **

And what do you know, of course, it only took him a matter of days to find me now I was into a normal routine and slept in my own bed.

"Sora!" he said, surprised out of his brain to see me walking to normally down the halls.

I turned. "What?"

"I- er…" and then I laughed, and I laughed hard, in almost a bitter way, because it suddenly hit me that after all this he really didn't know what to say. I smiled, and kept walking, it's not like I was going to make this _easy_ for him.

"Sora!" he called out, but it was too late, I let myself be swallowed by the crowds of tall people.

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**Hello All! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING! It means the world! Thanks HEAPS, and OHEMGEE Hyper Angel Mary, your review rivalled adecge's! Which is pretty impressive. It's quite sad, I'd swear some of your reviews are longer then my updates… heh. **

**Lots of love, To-love-is-to-lie. **


	42. Forgive

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**Chapter Forty-Two: **

_Love won't be tampered with, love won't go away. Push it to one side and it creeps to the other. - Louise Erdrich_

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**Tuesday 13/6/18 **

He found me again, not like its hard, but it was the same, he walked, I stopped, he stuttered, I laughed. He glared. I walked.

No change. I spend most of my time with Kimimaro and he knows this, but he wants to talk to me alone. Sasuke is quite surprised at my behaviour, I knew with grim satisfaction I'd proved his logic wrong. I'm quite proud, really.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**Thursday 15/6/18 **

He found me _again_, this time he was fed up, I had been trying to convince my Human Mind sensei to give me another week on the essay that was due, but he was quite firm about it, no more time. Great, I thought, I only have four days now.

And so I ran into him, his face was stern; Sasuke was behind him looking just as angry. Who was I fighting? Naruto? Or Sasuke? I knew Naruto wouldn't know the quiet battle that was going on, I was not going to be leaving by force, and I was out to prove that. Sasuke was out to make me go, '_for my own good'_.

"Sora, wait!"

"We've been though this." I mutter, but stopping none-the-less.

"Just wait and listen!" he said.

I sigh, and turn around, I was tired. "What Naruto?" it was almost rehearsed. I'd done this so many times.

I couldn't help it, I quoted his lines too. "Can you just listen for a few minutes?" we said in unison, I smiled wryly.

"See, I know what comes next." I say.

He glares, "Well, humour me."

"I'd rather not." I say.

"Just listen, Sora." This was Sasuke's voice, stronger then Naruto's. And I stopped.

"Okay, go on." I sigh.

"Well- I, er…"

I smirk. "And the same thing happens. Can I go now?"

"No!" Naruto said, stronger this time, looking up.

"…Yes?"

"No, I'm here to apologize, Sora."

"For what?"

"For… for trying to control your life, you're right."

"Right about what?"

"About everything damnit! Now stop it!" he sounded agonized, and I wanted to hug him, to tell him everything was fine and I'd never hurt him again. That really I'd missed him and he was wonderful, how could I hate something as amazing as Naruto?

"Stop what?" I stuttered a bit, forcing the coldness now.

"Stop being so… icy, towards me. I'm sorry, why can't you forgive me?"

Because then I can't go. "Because I'm mad." No I'm not, I'm not really.

"Why? Why can't you just forgive?"

Because I can't leave, then. "Because I'm angry!" Promise I'm not. You're forgiven.

"Can't you just-"

Just what? Let go? "No!" Yes, I can. You're forgiven.

"You're my best friend Sora! I miss you!"

I love you too. "So?" I miss you so much, I do. You're forgiven.

"You've done so much for me; please don't end it all like this."

I won't, trust me. "What?" You're forgiven.

"I don't want to lose you."

I'm so sorry, but you will… eventually. "Why?" We lose everything we love eventually, isn't that just what happens?

"I'm sorry, for the last time. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He paused. "What more do you want?"

For you too smile. You're forgiven, of course you are. I was silent.

"Please, forgive me." He closed his eyes, and I couldn't reject him anymore. I glanced at Sasuke, who was shaking his head slightly.

No, I can't, you were an asshole and I need to leave! Leave you! Leave everything! "You're forgiven." It was out loud this time. Everything sounds worse out loud.

He opened his eyes, the wonderful bright blue becoming happy again. And for a brief moment, I was glad I made that decision, it was selfish, but just to see him happy, isn't it worth it? No, for the pain I'll cause later, it isn't. I was just selfish.

"Really?"

No! I was kidding, your not! I hate you, you and your beautiful, happy-go-lucky trusting eyes. I sigh. "Really."

And he sprung foreword like a joyous four-year-old, so happy just to see somebody, and he hugged me, and I bit my lip so I wouldn't cry as he held me tight. "I've missed you."

"You too." I whisper, and then choke back the tears again, how could anyone hate somebody so wonderful and trusting? Nobody could, at all.

And now I lie in my bed, shivering even though we have the heater on, it's so cold. Everywhere is cold. Is there anything else left? What do I do now? How can I hurt him like this? The pain this will cause me is every bit what I deserve.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Friday 16/6/18 **

All last night, Sasuke came in and lay with me, he knew he'd done wrong by telling Naruto where to find me, he didn't think I'd actually do it. Why'd I do it? Was it really just to prove Sasuke I wouldn't go?

"I'm sorry, too." he whispered.

"I'm _more_ sorry."

"For what?"

"Because you'll have to deal with the shredded, maimed cut-up mess Naruto will be when I leave him behind."

"He's stronger then you think, Sora, he'll be fine."

"You think so?"

"I know it."

………………………………………………………………………………………………**.**

**Saturday 17/6/18 **

Today was the first time we all sat together, me, Sasuke, Kimimaro and Naruto. It was weird, very weird. I mean, it's been Kimimaro, Naruto and me, but Sasuke has never been there. And it's been Sasuke, me and Naruto before. But never any Kimimaro.

It was quiet. But I'm sure none of us were bothered, Naruto's obvious pride and happiness radiated from him, he was glad to have me back. This just cut more.

We had lots of food, which made it easier. Kimimaro and Sasuke got along surprisingly well. Well, not really. Just they didn't talk to each other, him keeping near Naruto, and Kimimaro edged towards me, occasionally their eyes met in a scowl, but never anything more. I think Sasuke has learnt not to mess with the people I choose to be my friends.

Sasuke and Naruto left, after an extra-long and intense silence. Kimimaro and I sat together for a while without speaking too.

"You forgave him?"

"Unfortunately."

"Why?"

"I don't know, I guess I'm still mad inside." I lied, adding 'yeah, at myself.' Silently.

"Then why'd you accept his apology?"

"What else could I do? He was so distraught. He's like the brother I never had; I can't stay angry at him for too long."

"I'll miss you."

And fear caught me, making it hard to breathe and making my throat seem to close up. Great, another one. He knew, didn't he? He knew I was leaving. Oh no, I'd never thought about Kimimaro… "Miss me, how?" I squeaked.

It was all over. Kimimaro would tell Naruto, how long did I have? I'd have to leave tonight, asap! I had no time!

"I mean, you'll be spending so much time with Naruto now, are you ever going to come by just to see me anymore?" and the knot in my chest released, and my throat opened again and I could breathe, he was just thinking I'd ditch him! Oh, the relief was so great I laughed. He gave me a weird look and I leant over to hug him.

"Nah, don't worry, you can't get rid of me that easy." I said, still dizzy from the shock, and then fear and then pure relief.

And he seemed relieved too, it was all a very relieving kind of day. And he hugged me back, he seemed to be more affectionate lately, not so much the cold and distant person he usually was. I don't mind the change, it's nice. Sometimes you need somebody who feels a bit more. I could talk to Sasuke, but he doesn't feel enough, I could talk to Naruto, he feels too much. Kimimaro is right in the middle somewhere. And that's why I like him so much.

"No, don't worry at all." I assure him again. "Even if you wanted me to go I'd stick around, because that's just the kind of messed-up annoyed person I am."

"I'm glad of it." he said, and then did the weirdest thing, held my head against his chest and leaned his cheek against the top of my head. at first I was a little uncomfortable with it, but it was nice to be held once in a while and mentally shrugged it off, and closed my eyes, and moved a bit closer.

One thing I love about Kimimaro is how nice he smells. So clean, like soap. But nice, still, unlike 90 of soap, which stinks.

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**Friday 23/6/18 **

This month has gone so quickly, to my immense worry _and_ pleasure everything is back to normal. Like from where we started. At first I was really worried, but now I see I'm not really losing anything. Just going back to square one, which isn't as bad as I had thought.

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**Hello all! Going away for a few days to see some friends, do not worry, my darlings! I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!! And to Thornwrath, yeah, I know this is taking a while, but it's the way my story works, hope it doesn't bother you that much. **

**THANKS SO MUCHCHHHHHCHCHCHCHCHHHH! I LOVE YOUUU!! (YOU. YOU RIGHT THERE! And possibly you, too.) **

**LOVE. To-love-will-never-be-in-this-care-to-lie. **


	43. Forget

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**Chapter Forty-Three: **

_That's just the way things go. We meet people, get to know them and then they get up and leave us behind.__ - __Animal Crossing: Wild World, 2005_

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**Saturday 24/6/18 **

For the first time in ages I went to just see Naruto, seeing as Kimimaro is away on Sound Four business, (and I am blissfully free of Tayuya who seemed insanely determined to make me do the dishes _every single_ night, despite the fact I now didn't care who knocked on the door, or who answered) and I was basically just bored to bits, so I filed out of my room and walked to Naruto's.

"Sora!" he said gleefully when I answered the door, this made me feel selfish again. I shouldn't have come and gotten his hopes up.

"Hey, I'm bored to bits. I need entertainment." I said, walking into his empty dorm, because he had the other two guys from the Sound Four in his room, so he was alone too.

I wasn't really surprised to see Sasuke there, making coffee, he had probably stayed the night beforehand. I cringed at this, I wasn't used to all this anymore, I would have to become desensitised again.

"SSASSUKKEE! I have come to ease the awkward-ness of the 'morning after'" I wink at him suggestively, he scowls at me and I can tell he's resisting the urge to pour the scalding hot coffee all over me and my suggestive comments. To prevent this, I grab it and smile at him. "Aww, made me coffee? I love you." I say, and kiss him on the cheek to his obvious aggravation and take his coffee to the Sofa, and then something clicks. "Hey, I thought you hated coffee."

"I do." He muttered.

"The why…?" I inclined to the coffee.

"You have no idea how addictive caffeine can be." He muttered, scowling.

And then I laughed, and I had to put the coffee down because I was laughing so much. "_I_ got _you_ addicted to coffee!" I chirrup gleefully.

"Hey, I helped too." Naruto said, sitting next to me. "Give me some credit."

"Okay, okay," I say solemnly. "_We_ got _Sasuke_ addicted to coffee!" and for the brief moment, everything for forgotten, the past, and more importantly, the future, and we high five'd and launched into speeches, comparing the times we made him drink coffee and who gets the most credit for it and who deserves a trophy more.

Eventually Sasuke got fed up with being teased and left. I called after him "SORRY I RUINED YOUR ROMANTIC MORNING!" but he didn't respond, I knew he heard me though.

And so Naruto and I spent the day laughing and talking and playing twister. It was nice to have him back, but every now and again I'd get that familiar stabbing ache of foreboding, I'd shake it away, not wanting to bother Naruto. But it was there, just waiting to remind me over and over and over. Remind me that this can't – and won't – last, so I shouldn't learn to depend on it.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Sunday 25/6/18 **

It had never really been an option, you know, not leaving. Not looking for him. I'd never really even thought of it. It hadn't crossed my mind. Naruto said it, not in the same way, but he said it.

I was washing dishes, as I was still bound by Tayuya, who just liked watching me wash them, so just to annoy her I'd do them while she wasn't there. Naruto was sitting on the bench swinging his legs and chatting away, I wasn't listening.

"..Remember that, Sora? And we all had to hide for weeks! Haha, and remember how we broke that window? Oh, we got into so much trouble…. And then remember the time, the first time you met me and Sasuke? It took us weeks to track you down, really are a master of your art…" I tuned out totally again, humming to myself. That was the great thing about Naruto, you didn't have to say anything. He could talk forever.

"And then, oh! Remember debating? And for weeks on end you'd practise… never were a good speaker, were you?"

I had heard that last bit right and glared. "Was better then _you_."

He snorted. "As if."

"Then why was I in the team and you in the crowd?" I point out, tossing him a tea-towel. "Go on, start drying."

"Coz I didn't wanna be on the team, who would?"

"You got extra credit, time off school, and free food…." I pause for effect. "Yeah, I can see why you wouldn't wanna be on the team…"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but that debating was obviously bad luck. Look at all the horrible things it caused." He pointed out.

And with that one sentence, my eyes glazed over into memories. Of course, it was bad luck, it got rid of two of the three most important people in my life with ease.

"I mean, Sasuke met that creep from debating, obviously."

And him. He left because of that, I don't know why. I still don't, he just left. He expected me to not want to see or talk to him, but I did. Why would he leave?

"And then he ran off, seriously, I blame debating."

How could he not mention him? Had he forgotten the days I didn't move or speak and hardly ate so easily? I haven't. I don't think I can.

"And then we had to come here because of it, which isn't too bad, I have to say…."

Why didn't he mention him? He can't have just forgotten…

"Oh! And Ga-," he stopped. "He left in the Sand debate, didn't he? That caused it."

I didn't take my eyes off the dish I had been wiping for the last five minutes in the same place as I nodded.

He sighed. "Sorry, I didn't mean too- I…. it still hurts, doesn't it?"

I stare at the same dish harder as I nod again. "What if we went to find him, not Sasuke? How would you feel?"

He quieted. "I guess… but maybe, you know, it's time to move on."

My head snapped up and I glared at him furiously. "Why?"

"It's not healthy. At all, Sora," he said, eyes concerned. "Can't you see your both not good for each other?"

"Why wouldn't he be good for me?" I say, I can see why I'm not good for him… I guess. I'm so me, he's so him. He's perfect. I'm not. I'm clumsy, messy, annoying, like to break things and he's all the opposites of that. The only one thing we ever had in common is that we hated the life we had before, and we both just wanted a new future. Something else. Hope.

"Look at you, wouldn't it be nice to be free, for once, Sora? Wouldn't it just be nice to get that huge weight you carry for him and fling it somewhere and never look at it ever again?"

"Sure, it'd be nice." I agree.

"Then why don't you?"

"Because I don't want too." I say, furiously scrubbing the dish again before throwing it down on the drying rack angrily and looking at him.

"I think you should, Sora, this can't go on."

"Naruto, we've been through this!" I snap, I couldn't believe him! "Can't you see I can take care of myself?"

His face seemed to crumple in despair. "No, don't ignore me again!" he pleaded, I sighed.

"I'm not."

"Just listen, please, I know, either way you can look after yourself, but want you to be happy. I want you to forget."

I turned away from him and walked into my room, pulling out some socks from the draw, busying myself with tiny tasks so I wouldn't have to look at him, I folded the socks together once I found a pair. "I don't think I can, Naruto."

"You can, if you had of gone to find him, and I had of come, I would have forgotten Sasuke, too.

I shake my head, and continue folding other things I find in my draw, needlessly busying myself with mindless pointless jobs, like folding socks and arranging deodorant and concealer bottles on the cabinet top.

"I would have started a new life, like you have, but your holding off, I see Kimimaro hurt because you hold all these feelings and secrets back, you don't want to become attached to anyone else." He said, he was right, but not in the way he thought. He thought I would be scared I'd be hurt again, no, I was scared I'd hurt them. But either way he was right.

"What do you want, Naruto?" I said, sighing like I was tired, which really, I was.

"Give up, Sora."

I shake my head, how? How could I? "How?" I croaked, my voice breaking as I tried to fighting off tears, but they stung my eyes and I clenched them shut tight.

"Forget, let go. It's been years, it's time you moved on."

"No." I said, firmly this time. He would not win this one.

Finding my room clean, I sat on my bed and toyed with the sheets, he walked over and sat on them, forcing me to look at him. "Let it all go, please, Sora. For me."

I shake my head, convincing myself more then him. "I can't."

"You can, what waits for you with him? Not much, you don't even know where he is or, more importantly, who he is."

"Who…?" I said, quickly pretending to wipe my eyes because their itchy to eliminate any tears that had escaped.

"I know you've changed, who says he hasn't? He might not be the guy you love anymore, Sora."

And I couldn't hold on anymore, I tried to speak, saying no matter who he was I'd love him, but instead tears poured out and I had to get a tissue and cover my eyes.

"Who says he doesn't even have a long-term steady girlfriend? Maybe he's even married, or what if he has a nice, new comfortable career and life? Who says he wants a visit from the past, Sora?"

My mouth had gone dry. He was right, Naruto was very, very right. He had escaped from Konoha like any fool should, who says he wants a reminder of the ties he made there, who says he even cared? Was it just I was the best option there?

Naruto sighed, and sat by me, wrapping his arms around me. "I'm sorry, but I don't want you hurt."

I closed my mouth, which had been hanging open. And nodded numbly. As much as my mind, body and heart strived to reject it, he was right. There was no hope waiting for Gaara. He was a lost dream, like a butterfly that had escaped a net.

All the better for him, I suppose….

Naruto kept talking, but realization had finally hit me, had it ever really occurred to me that maybe Gaara didn't want me? Or that I shouldn't fine him? Why hadn't I seen it before! So obvious, what hold did I have on somebody has perfect as him? None. None at all.

"… Sora, please, please, please listen, because I knew after we all graduated maybe you were going to find him-," yeah, after we graduated… "- but maybe, maybe you should just give up. Move on, there are lots of boys here who like you, I see them! It's not healthy for somebody to obsess over something as flimsy as this… it's not right…." He continued, but nothing else from that 'who says he wants a visit from his past, Sora?' had gotten though. I didn't care about me, but Naruto had a very, _very_ valid point.

How can I know he wants to even see me long enough to tell me to go home? Would he just feel guilty for leading me on all those years ago? A sharp stab of pain ran through my stomach. Years ago. That's how long since I've seen him. Years. He's gone. Of course he's moved on. How long has it been? One, two, three… four… four years this year, since he saw me last. He kissed me then, but I doubt he'd even want to see me now.

"…I just want you to be happy," Naruto was still talking, taking my horrifyingly blank expression as disbelief. And it was, but at me. How could I even kid myself? Of course, he doesn't want me in his whole, entire, huge life anywhere. I didn't have a place to fit anymore. "…And maybe, please, give up. I know I sound mean, like I'm selfish or jealous, but I just want you to be happy…"

"You're right." I said, stronger then I had imagined my voice to sound. It was definite. My heart ached.

"Sora, please! Please, please- uh, what?" He stopped his obviously rehearsed speech.

"You're right." I say again, firmly.

"Oh… so, you're not going after him, at all?"

I shake my head. "No."

"…Er…" he obviously had thought it would take hours to convince me he wouldn't want to see me again. No, his argument was too obvious. Maybe that's why I didn't see it, it was so simple. How could I even imagine that he'd still even be pleasantly surprised to see me?

It was just that. He wouldn't want to see me, at all. He didn't have to love me, I would go anyway. I was counting on just being able to be with him again, no matter how distant a friend I would be, but the idea that he wouldn't want me in his life, at all hadn't occurred.

"I'm glad you see it my way." Naruto said, pleased.

"He wouldn't want to see me, he's probably forgotten me completely by now. I was just one insignificant girl, how would somebody like him remember me?" I said, almost bitterly. "You're right, Naruto. He's better off without the reminder of the sad lonely six months, four days, nineteen hours and thirty minutes he spent with me in Konoha."

"You counted?"

"No, I cherished. But obviously he didn't."

"I'm sure he did, Sora-," there was something in Naruto's tone of voice, guilt, almost.

"No, he didn't, Naruto." I was angry at him now for making me realize how stupid I was, then saying the opposite. What was his problem?

"I'm not sure many people could forget you, Sora." He said quietly. "Least of all him."

I shook my head. "No, Naruto. He didn't even contact me, if he wanted to see me, wouldn't of he sent a letter?" I said.

A pained look shot across his face, and he seemed to want to say something, to scream it. He must feel guilty for making me feel so bad. But I was holding it in, the pain, the crippling obvious rejection, Naruto couldn't be there when I broke down. "Maybe the letter's got… lost."

"I doubt it, Naruto, now…" I couldn't hold up much longer. "I need to shower, go and visit Sasuke." And with that, I ran to the bathroom, tears already stinging my eyes, I reached the door and slammed it behind me just in time, and slid to the bottom of the door, numb with shock.

It was over. Was there really any more point in even writing? Was there even any adventure left to document. Naruto was right, if he had wanted me, he would have tried to contact me. But he hadn't. Naruto checks the mail every week, won't let me near it. If there had been a letter, he would have given it too me. But there was no letter. Nothing.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Monday 26/6/18 **

I took today off. Naruto was worried, but I feigned a cold saying I've had too many late nights and now I'm sick, my puffy eyes and sniffy nose at least went along with my story, Naruto likes to believe the sick-cold story rather then the sick-in-the-head story, so went along with it willingly.

When he wasn't there, I curled myself into the smallest ball I could manage and shook. I didn't know whether I should be totally destroyed or relieved. It was over, all the waiting all the wishing all the suspense.

But not the pain. The pain was still there, fresh and bloody as ever.

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**Tuesday 27/6/18 **

I couldn't stay in bed; I had too much to do. I'd spent my time being eaten away, I needed a distraction. Anything, so I went to class. Listening to my Visual Arts Sensei ramble on about art – with me egging her on with her favourite questions, to the rest of the classes despair – for 90 of the lesson was better then sitting in bed and being totally absorbed by the black hole that had been left behind from where Gaara had been, like he'd been forcefully ripped out of my being by Naruto, and now there was a huge gaping hole in my stomach where he should be. It was weird to think the people I passed couldn't see it, the hole; to me it felt so visible.

I wasn't going to be depressed. I wasn't. Not this time, not anymore. For Naruto, and Kimimaro and Sasuke, I wasn't going to make them worried.

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**Wednesday 28/6/18 **

I had a short day today, only four classes, so as soon as I could I walked to Kimimaro's room; he wasn't back yet, so I curled up on his bed and waited. Eventually I heard him come in and quickly composed myself, not wanting to scare him.

I arranged the brightest smile I could manage and grinned at him when he walked in, he seemed surprised to see me there, but glad. I hadn't visited in a while.

"Hello!" he said, a smile spreading across his face, and then my false smile was gone, and I grinned back. Kimimaro didn't need excuses; he wouldn't ask prying hurtful questions like Naruto would.

"Hey, I thought I'd stop by, I finish classes early today."

"Didn't your classes end three hours ago?" he said, checking the clock.

I flush. "Yeah…"

"You waited here all that time?"

"Yeah…" I grinned apologetically. "Sorry."

He looked at my strangely. "'Sorry'?" he repeated. "_You're_ saying sorry? You're the one who's waited here for three hours."

I laughed and patted the spot beside me on the bed and grinned, he sat down and we talked about nothing basically for the rest of the afternoon. He was the perfect distraction.

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**Hello ALL! Ohemgee! So many reviews! It was sooooo amazingly awesome to come home to all those! And yes, I did have an awesome time. Only a few minor injuries, it's okay. (Not as bad as that one time I tripped over a car :P) we found a hilarious swing and it was really a swing, more like something you held onto and slid because the ground was muddy and slippery. Lots of fun. **

**Hope you all had a good Long Weekend… if you guys did. We had one here, anyhoo. Yay for mooondays off! **

**Oh! And Ink'd Fairy Wings, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Sorry it's a bit late, but still, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! WOOO. Birthdays rule. I love them, pity we only have one. HAHAHAHAHA. I was about to say 'unless you are a twin, then you might have two.' But then realized twins are born on the same day anyway. Hahahaha. Whoops. **

**Anyway, hope you're awesomely awesome. Really liked this quote, been saving it for a while. Love, to-love-is-to-lie. **


	44. You Know Everything

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**Chapter Forty-Four: **

_Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.__ - __Michel de Montaigne_

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**Friday 29/6/18 **

The month is getting away from me. I have an assignment due, a long, boring pointless essay for Human Mind. Stupid name for it, it's hardly about human mind. We're studying Philosophical History now, and it's so long and hard to remember I think I'll be lucky to pass, just like my math exam.

I sat and studied with Kimimaro this afternoon, he quizzed me on the dates. "Okkay… Aristotle was famous for…?" he'd asked me a million questions. Long, boring, pointless ones. I was getting more and more wrong as he worked down the list of dates and people.

"Err, something about atoms." I said, I was sitting on my back with my head and part of my torso hanging over the side looking up at him. Blood was rushing to my head making it hard to think.

"Close enough…" he muttered and shut the book. "You're too tired to learn."

"Am not."

"You are, look at you."

And then I decided my head would explode if I kept it upside-down for too long and sat up. "I can't, have you tried?"

"Looking at you? Yeah, I have." He grinned, and I scowled.

"I'm sure you had a horrible time, sorry you had to." I said primly.

He laughed. "No, it wasn't too bad."

My face went red again, but not because I was hanging over the bed again. "Sure, you're probably just trying to spare my feelings." I sighed dramatically. "Oh, cruel life."

He grinned again and ruffled the bit of hair that hang over my face, I blew it out of my eyes and glared at him. "Let's go get coffee," he said, motioning to the kitchen. "The fatman is going to take it away soon."

I grinned, Kimimaro had got the habit of calling Jirobo 'the fat one' or 'the man with nine chins' from me, the when he had said sunk in and I gasped. "Not the good coffee machine!" I said in horror, _real_ horror.

He nodded solemnly. "He decided too much of his good expensive coffee was going 'missing'" he looked at my pointedly and I grinned.

I pouted. "It was nice coffee…"

"That's what he said."

I sigh. "Well, let's go use the rest – for old time's sake, of course – before he deprives me of coffee all together."

"You still have the instant kind."

"It's just not the same…" I muttered as we filed out into the kitchen.

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**Saturday 30/6/18 **

Last day of June. Very bored. Bored is dangerous.

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**2:19 **

I decided to go and see Kimimaro before I went back into the like-death state and didn't do anything for the rest of the weekend. It was important to keep moving, keep thinking.

I'd just been sitting there, there on the bench near the sink and he'd just been there, too, there being leaning against that very same bench. Nothing unusual. At all. We'd been talking over what we wanted to do when we grew up. It's was weird, since it's the same question we ask ourselves when we're four, and then six, and it's still the same when we're twelve, and then it's all the same right through until now. Except by now we were supposed to have achieved all those dreams we'd had since we were four and had thought them all up, discarded them, and then grasped them again, with twice the determination as before.

"I'll just continue into Bone specialty." He said firmly.

"Unless the rapist decides you'd be fit enough to rape small children, too." I said.

"Or Orochimaru decides I can take over the school and help other people, too." he corrected, I scowled.

"It's the same thing, dearie."

"No it's not." He glared.

"It is, love, what you call help is actually sexual harassment." I look at him seriously. "To violence against various homeless people, Konoha says 'no'!"

He grinned. "We're not in Konoha, so Orochimaru can rape whoever he wants."

"And that's not you, sadly?" I said, with wide-eyed false innocence, he scowled at me and picked up a sponge near the sink and threw it at my face, I tried to avoid it but just fell off the counter backwards and took several chairs down with me.

Once I'd recovered from my fall, I stood up shakily to see him nearly dying from laughter, I glared insanely, picked up the sponge, went calmly to the sink, poured dishwashing liquid on it, made it bubbly, and then with that, squeezed it over his all-to-sheeny hair. He stopped laughing and shook his silvery hair, sending bubbles flying over the walls.

I laughed. "We should sell you to various children's parties. I think you'd be a hit, it's also be good practise for that whole rapist career you've got ahead of you." I grinned at him.

He grinned back, and got a tea-towel to pat the bubbles out of his hair. I sighed, seeing he was missing all of them. "Give it here," I muttered, taking the towel and helping him up off the ground. He took my hand and I attempted to drag him up, but I don't think I was much help.

Once he'd stood up though I found he was too tall and had to get him to sit down anyway as I patted the bubbles out of his hair. "This isn't going to be pleasant when you shower…" I said, grinning to myself.

He still had an odd lop-sided grin on his face, and I took a small step back, walked around him to check for more bubbles and then nodded. "All done."

We spent the rest of the afternoon sitting and talking and drinking unhealthy amounts of coffee- well, I did anyway- and laughing over strange things that have happened.

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**Sunday, 1/7/18 – Another month, they all go so quickly, it's quite scary. **

Naruto visited earlier, but got bored because I was still sleepy and eventually left, infact, I was still in my 'mmrrffgg….' Sleepy stupor that I don't remember much but him saying 'Sora, I think you should hand more bath towels on your dresser, they clash nicely with those technicolour opinions of yours.'

And now I think of it, this doesn't make much sense. I checked my Calender today; half way through next month is next holidays. How strange.

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**3:29 **

Naruto wasn't there, of course, he was with Sasuke, I contemplated going and finding him there and asking him what colour bath-towels I should use, because as far as I know not many technicolour opinions clash nicely with bath-towels. Especially on dressers.

But then realized I'd probably interrupt their Sunday morning sex-fest and decided I'd rather wake Kimimaro up and convince him that it's nice of us to use the rest of the Man-With-Almost-Nine-Chin's coffee, as he can't get much unhealthier otherwise he might un-spontaneously combust, since spontaneousness requires effort, effort which I seriously doubt he can summon… and even if he could, I think he would smother it before it had a chance to show any effect.

I sat on the end of his bed and jabbed his leg, he rolled over, and I got the sudden impression he was awake. "Soooraa… let me sleep!"

"It's 10am! Wakey wakey fatty." I said, laughing at myself, since he was possibly the skinniest person on earth.

"Mrrpphh…" he said into his pillow, I rolled my eyes.

"Wow that is irritating, next time I do that, just get tiger balm or something." I snap, jabbing his leg again. "Wakey, wakey, sleeping beauty."

After a long while of persuading and poking, he got up, scowled and went to go shower.

After I while, I was sitting on his kitchen bench, eating half of his toast, since he never eats all of his. It's become kinda normal, I guess.

"Elections for Captain is coming up again, are you running?" I ask.

He shook his head. "No, nobody else runs but Kabuto until he's out of Uni, and nobody else runs for Sound Four but us, until we leave." He said.

I make a face. 'Why?"

"Because that's the way things are."

"That's silly."

He shook his head again. 'No, it's not. This way we're always up-to-date and never have somebody incompetent running. As soon as theirs a place up, everyone runs. We choose the successor, and teach them the way we run things, and then leave. That's why we have elections early." He said.

"Oh… I guess." I said, still confused. "But I still say it's silly."

He shrugged. "Maybe."

We spent a while chatting, going on about other things happening and arguing about various things. He always wins, he's smarter then me. Eventually the fatman comes in and we vacate the kitchen and go to his room, as I can only hold my breath for so long.

"So is everything cool with you and Naruto now?" he asked, sipping his tea, I'd made him drink some. He winced at its flavour and I glared at him.

"Yeah, and drink all of that! It's good tea, I think so. Nothing really more… to argue about, I guess." I said, suddenly not in the mood for tea and toast and put mine down.

He sighed, noticing this and took my plate and cup to the sink, I paled, and then tried to smile but couldn't, Kimimaro came over, I looked up at him, even when I was sitting on a bench he was still taller then me.  
"I'm sorry…" he said, looking at me. "But can I ask you something?"

I cock my head to one side. "Sure."

"Who's 'Gaara'?" he asked, his eyes were apprehensive, knowing my reaction wouldn't be nice, it wasn't, I went pale, I could feel it, and cold, very cold.

"How…?" I didn't even finish my question.

"Naruto is sleeptalking again." He said simply. "He's really worried you know, he's quite loud, too."

"Sorry." I said quietly. "It might be my fault."

"Is it okay if I ask who he is?"

"An… an old friend." I almost whisper.

"Where is he now? You never talked about him, unlike Shika and Sakura and Kakashi, which I know basically everything about."

"He's… he's a long way away. Too far away." I add the last bit more quietly, I couldn't look at Kimimaro anymore.

I risked a glance, and he was nodding, looking away. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" I asked softly, even though I was pretty sure I already knew.

"I shouldn't have asked just for the sake of my own curiosity."

"Don't worry. I would have too."

"…It just seems as if, you know everything about me, and I know so little about you."

"Don't think that." I said, more firm with my words.

"Why?"

"You know more then you think.'

I couldn't look at him, and then, to my surprise, his hand touched my chin lightly, and turned it so I was facing him, his eyes were intense. "How so?"

"I tell you everything." I said softly, not really liking being this close, or the topic. I was out of my league and wanted out.

"No, you don't."

I blushed, he was right. But I had tried. "You don't tell me everything." I point out.

He half smiled, and with that, he leaned in, I knew it! I knew he was too close, every bit of me wanted to run, but I couldn't, his lips touched mine and they were softer then I'd expected, for somebody who rarely ever smiled, they were warm. My heart was beating at a million miles per hour, but not in the way I think he wanted. He was one of my best friends; he couldn't do this to me! Not now, not here! Please, oh god, say he just slipped and accidentally gently lovingly tenderly kissed me. Please, please, please.

It seemed to go on, time was frozen, and I hated it. But I didn't want it to start again, what would I say?

Of course, with that thought, it started again. He broke away and my body didn't know whether to blush or go pale, so it did both and I ended up a sickly light purplish colour.

"Now," he started. "I _have_ told you everything."

And it all made sense, and I felt like I could puke, no! No, no, no, no! How could I hurt somebody else now? No! I was a trap, one big horrible trap. Not Kimimaro, I had prepared myself to break Naruto, but not him! Not Kimimaro, he wouldn't even understand! All he'd know is that I'd left him, and that I wasn't coming back. How would I look? How would he look?

There was a loud click, and the front door opened, and Naruto walked in, I got up immediately, and the confused, but slightly pleased, look on Kimimaro's face disappeared to be replaced by his usual cold frown.

I tried to conceal the shock on my face, but I had a feeling that purple colour had faded to plain deathly white and I tried my best to get colour into my cheeks again, but failed. "Are you cold, Sora?" Naruto asked as I walked up to him.

"No," I said, trying to be confused. "Why?"

"You look pale…" Naruto said, confused.

"Dunno…" I said. "But I really need to go, I have homework." I said, and pushed my way past him, as soon as I was out of sight, I ran, and I ran and ran, not to my dorm, but to anywhere. I found myself at the pool, and instantly stripped off and dived in without a thought.

The water was nice. Nicer then I would have though, I was still shaking, I wouldn't usually be this shocked, but it was Kimimaro! He was my Kimimaro, but not in that way. I loved him, but as Kimimaro, nothing more. I floated on my back until the shaking stopped, I am a death trap. I just took and took and the people I took from think I'm wonderful and won't ever go, but I always will. Can I not love anyone without hurting them? Is it only Sasuke and Shika, people who guard their hearts and souls so well that even me leaving won't hurt them? I know Sakura was in pieces when she heard Naruto and I were leaving.

I took a deep breath and dove beneath the water, it was cold, but not as cold as I thought. This had put a lot into perspective. What could I do? Was there anything? No, the most is to just pretend nothing happened. It was selfish, but I'd already don't the damage, so what more could I do?

Yes, pretending it was all just a shocking dream was the way to go. My hair felt feathery and light underwater, I risked opening my eyes, the chlorine didn't sting that much, and I surveyed the bottom on the pool, it was spotless. I let out a sigh, bubbles rose from my mouth, and I pushed off the bottom and came to the surface. I gasped in air and push hair out of my face, looking up, I came face to face with a familiar face.

He raised his eyebrows, I went bright red. "Uhh… Hi Kabuto." I said, grinning sheepishly.

He adjusted his glasses. "I suppose you know you should be suspended for this?"

"But your gonna let me off the hook?" I said, wincing.

He half-smiled. "Surprisingly, yes."

This was a shock, I had been preparing myself to be told to go and pack my things straight away. "Er, why?" I asked, surprised.

"I don't know," he said after a while, then half-smiled again. "I haven't seen you in a while, you've been keeping yourself surprisingly safe."

"Or just dealing with the injuries on my own." I suggest, trading water and swimming over to the edge of the pool to rest my head on the bricks.

"Or that." His eyes smiled at me, but I didn't trust Kabuto, there was something just weird about him. I could see him become a snake-rapist like Orochimaru-Sensei. "Tell me…" he began.

"Depends." I interrupted instantly.

He laughed, which was surprising too. "Well, do you know who it was in the vents?"

"No." I said instantly, way to quickly.

He chuckled. "You remember that injury you got on your leg?"

I nod. "It looked an awful lot, now I think of it, to be caused by trying to turn around in a really small space."

"Wow… coincidences, hey?" I said, raising an eyebrow.

He nodded, thinking now, and then went a little red. "Oh, um, I'll let you get dressed."

I went more then a little red, I went bright crimson, and nodded, he turned around and I ungracefully scrambled out of the pool and shoved my clothes on, suddenly going swimming in nothing but underwear and a see-through singlet wasn't so intelligent.

"Okay, decent." I said, even though I felt like drowned rat.

"Well, I won't say anything about this, but just tell me, it was you in the vent, wasn't it?"

The way my cheeks got redder gave me away, and I clenched my jaw. "I don't know who it was."

He smiled. "I'm surprised I didn't think of it… I thought I knew ever single possible passage or way around this school." He shook his head. "Genius, really…"

"Well, I'll tell them if I figure out who it was."

He grinned. "Another question, if you don't mind…"

"If I can answer."

"How did _you_ break the vent?"

"It wasn't me, remember?"

"Oh, yes, how did that person manage to break a vent? Those vents are sturdy."

"I think, he or she might have, by the looks of it, tried to fit something very, very, very large through it, I dunno, around the size of a mattress."

He laughed, then composed himself. "That's all I wanted to know."

"I'm not sure about any of that, I'll let you know, it's just a guess."

"Hm, an educated guess." He smiled, and then walked off. I glared after him, Kabuto annoyed me at times. He was always better then people.

I walked quickly back to my dorm, I suddenly realized how absolutely freezing I was. All I wanted to do was sleep, so I did. And now I'm awake, and things are just about as bad as before, but only 2 hours later.

And what's worse? How the hell do I _make_ things go back to normal?

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**Hello all! Oh, SHOCK! HORROR! What now? The suspense! Sorry I haven't updated in ages. I meant to, but then realized nothing and didn't do it, as you can tell. **

**LOVE YOU ALL SO VERY VERY VERY MUCH FOR REVIEWING!! THANKS SO MUCHHHHH!! THANKSTHANKSTHANKSTHANKSTHANKS!! Things start to move faster now, promise. **

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	45. Story

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**Chapter Forty-Five: **

_Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try. - Fran Lebowitz_

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**Monday 2/7/18 **

I forced myself to go to class. Acting as if nothing ever happened was surprisingly easy, only occasionally would I go red under his gaze, but otherwise it was the usual talk, work and day.

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**Tuesday 3/7/18 **

Spend afternoon with Naruto, it was nice to act natural, and not keep myself a certain distance at all times just in case he gets too close again. I have nothing to fear with Naruto. Well, nothing but the relentless guilt I get every time he smiles.

"When are the next tests?" I ask.

He goes pale, I know he hates tests and grin. "You gonna fail again and have to stay behind and do extra credit?" I grin evilly.

He shakes his head. "When? And what? And what do I study?" he asks frantically, I sigh, knowing I probably shouldn't have provoked him.

"Nothing, tests aren't for ages."

"You sound like Sasuke! NO! Their really soon, aren't they? Ah! Why did nobody tell me!" and with that, he rushed off to get his books, I took this opportunity to slip away quickly.

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**Thursday 5/7/18 **

I can't tell him no, I'm too scared. He kissed me again, he doesn't seem to mind the look of cold shock and slight fear, he isn't deterred, and that just worries me more. He is braver and touched my cheek this time, I wish I was that brave. Then I'd slap him and tell him not to kiss me otherwise I'd never talk to him ever again. But I don't. Gah.

I wish he wouldn't.

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**Friday 6/7/18 **

He wouldn't give up, really. I guess I'll have to tell him someday, but I don't want to. I know it's not fair, if I were him I'd be going mad with curiosity.

"…Naruto was sleep talking again last night." He said, a little _too_ casually.

"Mm." I was used to this by now. "What'd he say this night?"

"He's scared, more then before. He says 'Why, why can't she just stay?' and 'why…' over and over."

A fresh wave of guilt washed over me, I'd put a seed of doubt in his sub-conscious, it probably still knows how much I want to go. I sighed and nodded. "I am staying; I don't know what he's going on about."

"…You're not planning on telling me, are you?"

I shake my head. "Not today."

"One day." He said firmly.

I nod absent-mindedly. "One day…."

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**Sunday 8/7/18 **

'One day' has come sooner then I like. But I can see this, and I know I've been cruel to keep it from him this long. If I was him, and he was holding this in I think I would have exploded with impatience and frustration by now.

He'd practically dragged me from Visual Arts once the bell had rung, and I trotted along behind him, very confused and scared, I have to say when he finally said he'd have to murder me if I didn't tell him I was kinda relieved, I thought he was dying or something. I've never seen Kimimaro so annoyed.

And he was right to be. I sit here and tell him he's one of the best friends I've ever had -besides his kissing-habits, which I ignore with a passion- and then tell him nothing about me. He deserves better then that.

He had this look of absolute pleading and anguish in his eyes and I sighed. "I don't know what to tell, really." I said simply.

"Everything." He said promptly.

"I-I don't know what that is, I really don't know if I _can_."

"Try." He said again, quickly.

"First… tell me why you want to know." I said, a small idea forming, but first I needed confirmation it was right.

"Because I'm sick of not knowing you." he said after a pause. "There Naruto is sleep talking every night, and it's become something I look foreword too, that maybe he'll tell me something. And I'm sick of doing that; I figure that I want to hear it from you. Not a sleeping delirious Naruto who doesn't even know he's telling me things."

"Well, I'll try to-,"And then I smiled. "No, I can do better then try, wait here." and I ran off, this was one thing I really didn't think I'd ever show anyone, but I trust Kimimaro, and this is the best way to show him anything about my past, I can let him live it.

I came back with two tattered worn and severely abused books. "Sorry if it's too hard to read." I said sheepishly. "Some of it's… not really legible. And the stuff that is doesn't usually make much sense, but what you can read might put a few things together."

He took them, then suddenly shook his head. "I can't."

I looked surprised. "Why?"

"That's your diary."

"Was." I said firmly. "And it can tell you more then I can."

"Are you sure? It feels… wrong."

I shake my head. "But it's not. You're practically my best friend, it's what we do." And I handed them too him, and as soon as I did I felt venerable. I felt like another piece of me had gone with them, and I wanted to snatch them back and say he just has to deal with not knowing. But I couldn't. Somehow I knew it'd still be easier then telling him verbally.

"It's a long read. It'll take me at least three days to read."

"It's okay." I said. "Make it four, it takes longer to adjust to my writing then you think."

He opened it, and his eyes scanned threw the opening words. I knew them off by heart. I saw him grin. "You wrote down the noise your alarm clock makes."

I laugh. "Of course, starting is always the hardest part of anything. And alarm clocks seem to start a lot of things for a lot of people."

He grinned, and nodded. "Thank you."

I shrugged, trying to conceal the agony that was inside my head, I didn't want him to read that, it was mine! _My_ life, _my_ story. Why should he know? I felt more venerable then ever before. "I'm gonna go, have fun reading. It's not that exciting, I have to say." I tell him, hoping that maybe he'd give it back now, if I told him it was boring.

I got home and dove under the covers, I just wanted to hide, I hated the fact I'd just given him me, essentially. Who I was, who I am. And Gaara, I had given him Gaara, or what I had left of him anyway.

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**Monday 9/7/18 **

Visual Arts essay due in next week. Yuck. VA! Why? An ESSAY! On stupid periods of art throughout history, who cares? Erg. Yuck. I really don't want to do this, I'll have to go to the library. I haven't visited the library before, it looked small and dark and full of people who haven't seen daylight in years.

Gross.

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**Tuesday 10/7/18 **

I had a short day, so I walked to Naruto/Kimimaro's dorm and sat down, waiting with my essay and various books and got started. Okay… hmmm, impressionists. They… impressioned… people… with, er, art?

I really should have listened… Impressioned isn't even a word, is it?

I was glad for a distraction, and the man with many chins came in, so I was glad to make a big thing of dramatically picking up my books and moving them to Kimimaro's room.

Unfortunately, that didn't last long and I found myself staring at the damn piece of paper again. Okay, screw impressionism. Post-impressionism. Damnit! Why must we all make impressions on stuff?!

I shifted on the bed, and found something uncomfortable sticking into my back, I reached around and glared at it, but came face to face with my diary, I felt weird, as if I shouldn't read where Kimimaro is up too, but then laughed at myself. It was _my_ diary. As if I don't have a right to read it!

_"If they bother you, tell me." He says, stepping closer. I look up at him._

_"I can take perfect care of myself, Gaara." _

_"Yeah, and you can handle making lemon batteries too."_

_I scowl and turn red. "That was an accident." _

_He lifts a lock of blonde hair. "One that nearly made you bald."_

_My scowl deepens, and my heart races at his touch. "And why are you here anyway?" I demand my face now red for different reasons._

_He smirks, and lets go of my hair. "Because I wanted to see a friend? Is that so hard to ask these days when you're in such popular demand?" _

_I glare. "Oh shut up. Sasuke and Naruto are just being dickheads. You get used to it." _

_He goes to the door. "Like I said, if they ever bother you, tell me." And before I can repeat my 'I'm FINE!' he leaves. _

_I shake my head, and then scowl again as I notice he didn't eat his cake, either did Sasuke. Those two boys have a lot in common. I wonder if Gaara is gay… Nah, he doesn't seem even slightly remotely possibly gay._

_SEE!? That is why im as unhappy as an orphan child in a shredder! Erg. Boys. They are so weird. Except Naruto, for some reason I find him more girly…_

I sigh. Wow, so he's already met Gaara. _My_ Gaara. Who he was then, I hadn't looked at this for years now, I just always keep it with me, for some weird reason. I'm quite attached to it.

I grin; I knew Kimimaro would laugh at my 'unhappy as an orphan child in a shredder' comment. It was the kind of thing he found amusing.

I shut it, and ran my hands over the pages, there were little dints in them, he'd dog-eared pages. Now I felt worse, like I really shouldn't read it, but then shook it off. It was my diary, why shouldn't I?

The first few were around bits where Temari was, and I realized how much this thing would answer. The next was around Sasuke and Naruto, and I felt guilty for telling their secret. The last one, it confused me, it was Gaara and I making a cake. This hurt more then all the other memories. It was such a good one, but it was such a pointless one. Why would he dog-ear that?

I was brought back to reality by the sounds of the front door opening, I quickly shut the book and shoved it back under the covers, feeling stupidly sheepish for not wanting to be caught reading my own diary.

He came in, and I felt happy to see him happy about me being here, I grinned back and motioned to my homework. "Possibly the first essay written entirely on nothing." I say.

"I don't see anything…" he said. "You're papers blank."

"Exactly." I grin.

He laughs, seeing what I'm getting at and sits down. "What do you have to do?" He seems to look at me now in a different way when I zone-out, even if I'm not even thinking about life four years ago, he still looks at me with a burning curiosity. He must have a million questions.

I smile knowing he'd never have the guts or patience to ask them all, and settled down to make him help me on something he has no idea on, knowing that even though he's never studied art, he'll know what to do.

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	46. Sick?

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**Chapter Forty-Six: **

_It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.__- __Pierre Beaumarchais_

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**Thursday 12/7/18 **

He did it again. The nerve. I didn't have the same reaction, but I still left the room as soon as I could, and went back to pretending it never happened. I know, that sometime my 'ignore it and hope it goes away' strategy is going to fall through, and I will be in big trouble when it does, but until then I will stick with it.

I really wish he wouldn't. I have only ever been kissed twice and even though it was so long ago, I can easily tell the difference between kissing him, and kissing Gaara. And I won't even start about kissing Itachi, if they can be called a kiss and not assault. I wonder, once he finishes, will he still kiss me? Knowing really I can't love him. It's taking a cowards way out, but either way I'll run away from the problem, so maybe this is the slightly-better way to deal with it. If it can be called 'dealing with it' at all, hoping he'll get the hint my 15 year old self left for anyone who I let read my diary and then tries to kiss me.

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**Friday 13/718 **

Gah… I have a sore throat, my voice is going, I sound like a crazy obese man. Naruto laughed like a mad thing when he heard and I had to nearly pour my tea on him to get him to shut up.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:03 **

I went to visit Sasuke for the first time in aggeesss, he seemed pleasantly surprised to see me. I shrugged. "Naruto kept laughing at me."

Of course, after hearing me speak in my croaky man voice he started laughing too, I scowled and put the kettle on, boiling water seems to persuade them all to stop laughing at my man voice.

After he had stopped laughing, I regretted it; it was only so often you got to see the phenomenon that was a Sasuke laughing fit. If only it was over something bearable, and not my man voice.

"You gave your novel to Kimimaro?" he said, his eyebrows raised so high that they went under his fringey bits.

"Novel?" I say, sipping my tea (with lemon and honey, to soothe a sore throat. I saw it on a Strepsils ad.)

"I've seen that thing, Sora, it's like two 300 million page notebooks."

I glare. "Is not."

He nods. "It is. Anyway, that's not the point, the point is, _why_?"

I shrug, I really don't know why I tell Sasuke so much, I think it's just because we're so much the same in a way, he was just more determined then I will ever be. "He wanted to know me, and so I said the best way he could was to read about my 15-16 year old self, who is practically the essence of me."

Sasuke gives me a strange look. "Yes… of course."

I sigh. "He kissed me, you know."

This gets another reaction in the eyebrow department. "Really?"

I nod solemnly, knowing that anything serious I said would be laugh at because of my croaky voice.

"What did you do?" The sad thing is, not many people realize Sasuke gossips like an old lady, he just acts as if he doesn't care afterwards. I even wonder if Naruto notices that.

I smile at my thoughts, and then answer his question. "Turned a scary purple colour and then ran away, what else?"

Sasuke groaned. "You're kidding me?"

"Nup, if I said 'I handled it with grace and precision and carefully and gently explained to him that I wasn't really interested in that kind of relationship at the moment with anyone but a boy I haven't seen for four years' would've you believed me?"

"…No."

"Exactly."

"Gehh… Sora, you suck with difficult situations."

"Ha! You think that's bad, check out my math test scores!"

"Stop joking! Poor guy, has he said anything about it?"

"He did it again just the other day."

"And you…?"

"Same thing."

This time, his head hit the table. "I think I should tape your life and show it to the first years as a list of 'what never to do in difficult situations'."

"Yeah, actually, do that." I said seriously. "It'll sell for millions and every school will want one, but I get a 10 cut." I tell him.

He nodded wearily. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, I guess I should have seen it coming."

"Er, why?"

"Not many people can resist your charm and wit." He said dryly.

I snort. "I wish."

"Sad thing is, there's truth in that. I mean, the only boys that you actually talk to that you haven't seduced are Me, Shika and Naruto."

"Not you? Damn, and I try so hard." I pout.

He laughs. "Of course you do, because falling out of vents and then laughing at my boxers is the best way to seduce any man."

I shrug. "It's worked so far, hasn't it?"

He sighs. "You're right, which is quite sad. What will we do with you, Sora? So clumsy and uncoordinated…" he shakes his head mockingly. "And yet you make 80 of the guys surrounding you fall head-over-heels for you."

We spent the afternoon chatting, before I told him I had to finish that Visual Arts essay, he nodded, of course he'd already done it, and retreated to my dorm to continue staring at a wall for an hour or two and drinking unhealthy amounts of coffee.

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**Saturday 14/7/18 **

Bahhhh… I feel terrible, I have a cold and my nose is blocked, adding to my man charade. I bribed Naruto with 5 to go and get me a lifetime supply of eucalyptus drops and butter menthol.

Now I'm in bed with chicken soup, and usually I wouldn't find this so bad because of the soup, but I do find it very bad, for the same reason. Naruto's soup-making skills need improving, but I don't have the heart to tell him. Geehh… I need sleep.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**10:23 **

Okkayy, need to get rid of this soup somehow. Preferably before he comes back from his chemist trip. But the window is soooo farr away…

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

**10:31 **

Ahah! The toilet!

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**10:54 **

Horrible timing. But a good save, I must admit. I had staggered my way to the bathroom with the terrible soup, taken one look in the mirror, wished I hadn't, as my nose was bright red and my skin was all sallow and unhealthy looking. I was just in the mist of putting the soup out of the cup and into the toilet when Naruto comes in, the door makes a loud enough noise to warn me and also scare the hell out of my, I drop the spoon into the toilet, and quickly shove the bowl into the cupboard under the sink just in time, he comes into the room and surveys the scene he looks worried.

"Did you throw up?"

Hearing an excuse, I leap for it, trying not to laugh at the fact that even Naruto could mistake his chicken soup as vomit. "Yeah… it must be the flu." I say, he comes over and tells me to get back into bed and he'll clean up, I try to resist this, and cross my fingers and once again tell god I'll never speak his name in vain ever again if he flushes that spoon down the toilet.

I hear the toilet flush, and no words of 'hey, why is there a spoon in here?' come, and I breathe a sigh of relief. Mission accomplished.

He dumps the load of various cough lollies on the bed and sighed. "Anything I can get you?"

I shake my head. "Not really."

"Want more soup?"

"No!" I say sharply, then say. "I… er, don't want to throw up again."

He nods. "Yeah, no soup."

"Okay, get out of here before you catch my cold." I tell him and shoo him out of the room so I can feel dizzy and sick on my own.

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**11:30 **

I have all but eaten half a tub of Vicks Vapour Rub. Already I've gone through several million cough drops. I am practically swimming in tissues. And whenever I get up, I can't see for several minutes due to the fact my head is spinning.

The world can end right about now, I really wouldn't mind.

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**11:36 **

I HATE COLDS!

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**Hello all! THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE REVEIWS!! They made me laugh! You are all comic geniuses! Really, you are. And I would swear some of you write longer reviews then my updates. (Not a bad thing! at all! I love it, I should really learn to update bigger though…) **

**THANKSSOMUCH!!LOVEYOULOTS!! **

**Loooove, to-love-is-to-lie **


	47. Contagious

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**Chapter Forty-Seven:**

_The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive. - Robert Heinlein_

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**2:14**

I had sleep, and when I woke up Kimimaro was there, he had cleaned up all the old tissues and such and somehow organised the cough drops in order of flavour, colour and then how many there are left.

I smiled at him and coughed out a "Hey."

He grinned back. "Naruto said you had the flu."

I nod. "True. But I mainly blame his chicken soup for the headaches and coughing fits."

He laughed. "Remind me to say no to Naruto's chicken soup if he offers."

I nod. "It would be wi-," I got half way through the word 'wise' before I went into a mad coughing fit and used about another 14 tissues. I glare at the tissues and things. "I. _Hate_. Colds." I mutter.

Kimimaro chuckled. "I brought more cough drops, but it seems you already have about a lifetime supply."

"I plan to live for several, bring on the cough drops!" I say, trying to smile but just sneezing instead, then suddenly realizing something. "Get out!" I say wildly. "You could catch this! Out, out out!"

"Naruto was allowed to visit." He says, and for an insane minute I thought he pouted but then thought better and figured it was just my imagination.

"Naruto has a normal _functional_ immune system!" I say again. "Out!"

"I'll catch it anyway, if I'm going to get it, I will have already contracted the virus from you beforehand."

"OUT!"

"Okay, okay."

"And eat lots of garlic. I heard that is good for the immune system."

"I'll have horrible breath."

"Well don't kiss anyone and you'll be fine." I tell him. "Now, OUT!" and he shuffles out moodily. Only once he was out of the room I realized my comment about not kissing anyone counted for more then just bad breath, I grinned then sighed. If Kimimaro dies from my cold I will be extremely annoyed.

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**4:46**

Gah. Why does everyone want to catch my cold and get sick and spend a fortune on coughdrops?

Sasuke dropped in, WITH MORE COUGHLOLLIES! Seriously, I wouldn't have spent like 20 on eucalyptus drops if I had of known various people would be giving me about 40 packets each.

Does this mean I own everyone about 100,000 packets of cough lollies?

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**7:57**

Needdd… Sleep… I never realized doing nothing is so exhausting. But can't sleep because I haven't done anything to make me need to sleep so I can't.

But I wannnaa… I'm sick of being conscious when I can't breathe. And yes, being unconscious when I can't breathe isn't safe, but I don't care! It's a hell of a lot more comfy!

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**Sunday 15/7/18 **

I feel worse, if that's even possible. Kimimaro tried to visit again but I threw my boxes of tissues at him. Then I realized I had no tissues and made him cover up his face and throw them at me and hope they landed somewhere I could reach.

I have read about every book I have four times. Which says something about my books, really. Naruto and Kimimaro donated their TV to me, which was very kind, and lent me all their movies, but I just read the back and got a general idea and didn't watch any, because they all stink.

I have studied everything in my test book 100 times because our term tests are coming up reaaaal soon. I've made Kimimaro promise he'll go to my teachers if I'm still sick tomorrow and get my work. Not because I'm actually worried about the tests, but because if I don't have something to do soon I'll explode.

And Tayuya, in a rare show of affection bought me a packet of strepsils. I was very grateful, even hiding the other 100 packets I have under the blanket so she felt extra-useful.

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**2:05**

Boredddd. So very, very, _very_, very bored.

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**4:34**

You know how cruel life is? Very. I'm running out of cough lollies.

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**11:40 **

I can't sleep. My head hurts too much, I think I need fresh air, being cooped up inside all day can't have been good for me.

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**12:04 **

Of course. I really should have known better, who else in the entire school would still be skulking around the pool-area at midnight? Of course, none other then Kabuto.

He was reading. I was planning to turn around and just go find somewhere else to get fresh air, but I sneezed really loudly when I was trying to be stealthy, his head snapped up, and finding me there scowling just seemed to bring a smile to his face.

"I knew you'd turn up here sooner or later."

"So was I sooner or later?"

He paused. "Somewhere in between, really. I was expecting later. You always seem to come here when something bad has happened, and I wouldn't want that, would I?"

"How would you know?" I'd never really noticed that, after I fell… then when Kimimaro kissed me, and now when I have a really horrible cold.

He shrugged. "I just notice these things, so what happened this time?"

"Nothing, I just needed a place to puke and I figured the space your wasting would be perfect."

He chuckled. "Definitely not happy, sounds like you have the flu."

"Bingo." I sniff, and figure there's no point in going home, so I sit down and roll up my pants so I can dip my legs in the warm water.

"The swimming team won't be happy when they all get infected from you touching the water."

"Good. I'd hate to think of what kind of sick person would be happy when they get my flu from me touching water."

He sat near me, but a far enough distance so I couldn't 'accidentally' cough on him. We sat in silence for a long time, he didn't seen to like me, he just seemed generally fascinated with me. And I think knowing things is what Kabuto likes, and I think I have to many secrets he wants to know, and really he can get what he wants out of most girls easily being the most powerful student in SS&UFG&HAS and frankly, that just makes him the least likely person I'd tell. I know the one he wants to know, why Sasuke won't join the Sound Four; I know he could easily make the Four a Five. Sasuke had told me when I first arrived that Kabuto and the rest of them wanted him in their club; he'd turned it down because he wanted out too. But he wanted out once he'd got out with honours, so he could get in anywhere he wanted, and then rub Itachi's face in it.

"So why are you even here, Kabuto, just to see me unhappy?" I snap, usually I could put up with his patronising smiles, mainly because when I hurt myself he fixes me no charge, but waiting here knowing I'd come here damn well pissed off was just mean.

"No reason, really." He paused. "How long have you and Kimimaro been together?"

I stiffened. "We haven't."

"Really?" There was a note of actual surprise.

"Really."

"Hm, strange. I thought I heard he kissed you."

"So?"

"Wouldn't most girls jump on a chance to be dating one of the Sound four that isn't obsessed with spiders or obese?"

I glare, feeling sorry for the Fatman. Only I can call him fat. "I'm not most girls."

He laughed. "I should have known."

"Yeah, you should've." I tell him, relaxing a bit.

"So will you?"

"What?"

"Start a relationship with him."

"Not in that way, no." I lay back with my legs still in the water, my arms behind me head; I sniff and wish I had of brought tissues with me.

"So it's Sasuke, then?"

I laugh, and then wish I hadn't as my head hurts. "No, no, no." I tell him smiling at his horrible guess.

"You spend quite some time there."

"I know him from my high school, no big deal."

"Oh… Naruto?"

"Cousins." I say promptly, it's been our excuse every single time anybody asks if we're dating ever since Sasuke came up with it to let him come along on that Holiday.

"Then who?"

"Er, nobody." Here, at least. Or ever? What happens now I have no heart to give, and I promised I wouldn't go get it back?

He frowns, he obviously finds the fact I'm practically surrounded by gorgeous boys and aren't sleeping with any of them strange. "You kno-,"

"Yeah, I know, I know how many girls would kill for my position. Surrounded by gorgeous men and being single, wow. What a gift." I roll my eyes. "They are my _friends_, I know what they eat. I wouldn't kiss them if somebody paid me."

"No _girl_-friends?" he paused. "Well, friends that are girls. Unless there is something in that…"

I glare. "No. Not here at least. I have some in Konoha." Kabuto is nice to talk to when he's not being 'I'm better then you'-ish. Which honestly really irks me.

After a while I told him that I was bored with trying to make the swimming team catch the flu and went back to bed. I stumbled around for a while before I knocked over my dressing table in the dark, found I was too tired to bother fixing it and just hopped into bed.

Gah. Sleeeppyyy. Must sleeeep. Nighty night night.

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**Monday 16/7/18 **

I really knew I'd be home today, Naruto knew too and promised to tell the teachers of the classes we have together. I woke up and felt basically the same, went back to sleep, and then woke up again at about midday. Tests soon… I can't afford to be sick.

I eventually decided to go and shower because I needed to feel slightly clean, after showering I got my schoolbag, and then realized when I'd tipped over my dressing table everything had gone everywhere. I sigh, and bend down slowly to pick everything up.

Though, the interesting part was looking at all the insanely interesting things in my dresser. I sifted through them as I put them all back in the battered dresser, I find notes, and many, many bobby pins, and what looks to be a really really old packet of jellybeans. I aim for the bin and miss, but figure that one of these days I'll feel well enough to walk to the bin and fix it.

I spend the rest of the day in bed, studying through the notes I have in prep for the tests ahead.

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**Wednesday 18/7/18 **

Feel better! Still have a runny nose and the such, but no headaches or violent coughing fits, Naruto seems glad to see me when I run full-bolt into his dorm and tackle him screaming "EUREKA! I'M CURED!"

He laughs. "Surprising, since all those cough-lollies you ate can't be good for you."

"They cleared my vascular system." I say, pointing to my nose.

"Is that even your vascular system?"

I shrug. "I have no idea." But grin anyway. "I'm gonna go find Kimimaro, he needs to know I'm cured!"

"But still infectious." Naruto reminds me.

I sigh. "Yeah… okay, well tell him I'm off to VA, and I'll see him when I stop sneezing…"

VA was fun, I spent the lesson painting a moustache on the pictures of people in the newspapers under my canvas until the sensei got pissed off at me and told me to either do my work or stop wasting paint.

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**Thursday 19/7/18 **

Being infectious is boring. I mean, I don't mind visiting Naruto but he could infect Kimimaro. So I planned to visit Sasuke, but then realized that he'd then infect Naruto who would infect Kimimaro. Gah. Being thoughtful SUCKS.

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**4:34**

We have our first half-yearly exam tomorrow. Math, in some way I'm glad that I get the hardest out of the way first, all I've got to do is pass. Just pass. It doesn't matter if I only pass by 51 percent this time. I don't care; all I want to do is pass.

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**Friday 20/7/18 **

YESS!! I PASSED!! Well, I think I did. Studying actually works, teachers say it and you go 'pah, as if.' But then it works! It's like magic.

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Saturday 21/7/18

It's like freaking solitary confinement. I hate it! grr. I don't want to be infectious, studying without various studybuddies SUCKS. To the max.

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**Sunday 22/7/18**

That's it! If I'm still contagious I'm not contagious enough. I'm going to go visit Naruto + Kimimaro.

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**Hello all! Sorry I haven't updated for YEARS!! Hope your all well! Gotta run!! **

**LOVE YOUUU!!**


	48. HalfYearlies

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**Chapter Forty-Eight (My god, already?): **

_Can I be your memory? – Sugarcult, 'Memory'_

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**2:10 **

I spent the morning in Naruto's dorm, laying on his bed with books everywhere, I still don't risk being in Kimimaro's room and I explained to him kindly that I just didn't want him to die because of me (from the other side of the door) then suddenly backtracked and told him I'd rather he didn't die at all, but it would be about 1000 times worse if it was my fault.

Then he explained that my giving him the flu wouldn't do anything, but I don't believe him. So it was just me and Naruto, who doesn't do well under pressure. Especially test pressure.

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**Monday 23/6/18 **

I hate being contagious, when do you know if your not contagious anymore?

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**Tuesday 24/6/18 **

Lalala. We have to revise. And fast. Tests soon! I have a Human Mind essay to write in class on Aristotle or whoever on Thursday. Worryworryworry.

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**Wednesday 25/6/18 **

Oh! And look! Do I see a Math exam on Friday, why yes, I do!

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**Thursday 26/6/18 **

Ahoy there maties! Quick! On the Horizon! There be a mighty fine test, lads. Come Monday we'll be seein' a haul o' English test, boys, we'll eat books tonight!

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**Friday 27/6/18 **

I HATE MATH. I am about 100.2 percent sure I failed that. And if I did, I will be insanely sad. Because I saw the hell of extra-credit assignments and holiday tests Naruto had to do, I WANT MY HOLIDAYS! Gah. Please, please, please just let me pass. I don't care if I get 51 this time! Just leeet me paaaasss! Grrr.

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**Saturday 28/6/18 **

I have been staying away from Kimimaro all week for his own safety, but today he snapped. He knocked on my door and I sung. "Come iiinnn!" in a fat musical old lady voice, opening the door and bowing comically, then realized it was him and shut it.

"OHNO! YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE JUST DONE? I COULD HAVE BREATHED ON YOU!" I scold insanely.

He sighs from the other side of the door. "Sora, even if I do get your flu it won't matter damnit! Now let me in!"

"No! if your in the room there's a good .65 percent chance I'll breathe in your general direction, followed by a 1.2.3922233111.1004883times 10 to the 5th percent chance that you might contract a cold that is found on every 62342.a.2332th molecule in the 343223.2-,"

"Sora shut up! Have you been studying math?"

"Yes."

"I thought you already had your exam."

"I'm trying to see how likely it is I'll fail."

"What's it on?"

"Indicis and percentages, mainly."

"Just let me in, I won't get sick, promise."

"How do you know! What about all those statistics I told you?"

"You made those up."

"No I didn't."

"Yes, you did."

"Nup. All true, strike me down if I lie."

"Well open the door so I can!"

"But I'm not lying!"

"Yes, you are. Now I have your novel here and I swear it'll end up in the sink if you don't let me in."

I sigh, and open the door, glaring. "Huh?"

He grins and steps in. "About time."

"Well I was worried, I mean, you sure you won't catch my flu and die?"

"Swear, scouts honour." He says solemnly. I have no idea what scouts honour is, but figure it must be important.

He surveys my room and raises his eyebrows, it's a mess, a big book covered paper mess. "Studying?"

"It's a messy business."

"Can I join? Naruto is vacuuming."

"Er, so?"

"He thinks nobody else will hear him sing when the vacuum is on."

I wince. "Ah… I see." And then shrug and motion to my bed. "If you can find a free spot, take it."

He nods, and then sighs and sits on a small patch of carpet and leans against my bed I laugh and belly-flop onto my papery bed, sending algebra sheets everywhere. "So how has your week been while I was in quarantine?"

"Uneventful. Relaxing... _Quiet_." He says.

I laugh. "God, what a miserable time it sounds like you had without me."

"Very." He says, not listening, already shifting through his folder full of notes.

"So what do you have to study for?"

"Everything, math, English, advanced English, extended math, med studies, ect, ect. All first year subjects plus others."

I wince. "You really need to ease up on the work."

He shrugs. "If I didn't work, what would I do?"

I think. "Have a life?"

He grins. "And we wouldn't want that now, would we?"

I sigh and go back to swimming in notes, slowly gathering them and deciding I should study for my next test instead of feel sad that I failed math.

After a long while, he stands and stretches, and then goes "Oh!" and digs around in his folders some more. "Before I forget…"

I sit up, tired from being off in study-land and rub my eyes. "Geh…"

He pulls out my two much abused diaries, I grab them back quickly, feeling somewhat _very_ relieved to have them back. It was like I was gone while they were; it's stupid to love two books so much.

He looks at me differently. I can tell. I look up at him, feeling stupid for hugging two tattered books to me, he smiles faintly.

"Sorry."

"For what?"

"For kissing you."

I look away and shrug. "You didn't know."

"Where is he now, do you know?" He says, sitting down. I knew there would be a flood of questions.

"In Suna." I say.

He nods. "You miss him?"

"More then anything."

He seems slightly disappointed with this answer but nods. "Have you seen any of them since?"

"It was Shika and Sakura's wedding I went too."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Good." And I suddenly realize he's become attached to people he hasn't even met, I laugh.

"One day you'll meet them." I tell him. "But don't say something weird like 'hey, remember that time you gave Sora a make-over? Oh, those were the good ol' days…' coz you'll creep Sakura out." I tell him.

He grins, and then continues with the interrogation, it goes on for a while until he pauses. I know a bad one is coming up and sigh. "Spit it out."

"Have you seen your mother since?"

"Since when?"

"Since she left."

"Just let me clear something up, I'm not a sad story, I'm quite a successful insane happy story, really. Besides a few major points, I am. Mum left because she had too, I really don't know why, and don't think I ever will. But she did, and now, I think, that I really can't blame her for it. I mean, that could be me one day. I could see me doing that, and I won't blame her when I don't know the circumstances."

He nods. "Are you going to go?"

I shake my head. "No, I want to, but Naruto told me, there's no point…" I sigh. "He's probably unimaginably successful and rich and has lots of beautiful sexy women serenading him all day."

"I think he'd still like to see you."

I shake my head. "It's not… I can't say it's not _worth_ seeing him, because anything would be. But, I can't. Really, Naruto's logic works and adds up better then mine."

Kimimaro shakes his head. "I don't know, since I don't really know what Naruto said, he hasn't said it in his sleep, sure he isn't lying?"

I shake my head immediately. "No way, he would never do that."

"Well, I'd have thought that if it was such a big point, he would have mentioned it in his sleep-talking…"

"Maybe it's not a big point to him, just one to me." I defend him, Naruto wouldn't lie to me. I knew that for sure.

Kimimaro shrugged. "Probably…"

We spent the rest of the afternoon studying and quizzing each other on things that had no relevance to any test we'd ever be doing, but we did it anyway.

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**Hello hello hello! On the run, AGAIN! Hope you lurved it! I LOVE YOU!! lovelovelovelovelovelove. Gotta run! **

**LOOOVE YOUU!! **


	49. Earrings

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**Chapter Forty-Nine: **

_And as she turned into the night, all he had was the words 'Sorry I met you Darling, I'm sorry I've left you.' – The Last Shadow Puppets, 'The Meeting Place' _

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**Sunday 29/7/18 **

Boored. I hate studying.

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**Wednesday 1/8/18 – ANOTHER ONE? Already?! Man, these things just fly by… **

Had English on moonders, did okay I reckon. Should pass. If I don't, I'll be slightly surprised. But only slightly.

VA prac assessment is due tomorrow, I have to go and spend extra time in the art room this arvo to finish my painting. Geh.

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**Thursday 2/8/18 **

Hahaha. Yes! No more tests until… NEXT WEEK! Hahaha. Naruto is a stressed mess again and is probably going bald. I tell him there's no point malting over lost marks and he tells me to stop calling him a bird, I shrug. He goes back to poring over revision sheets and text books.

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**Friday 3/8/18 **

Spent day studying, again. I need to know my Science down pat. And Blodge. Gah. Hate all this, I think I have to get out for the weekend. I'll see if I can get Kimimaro or Naruto out of the house to go get some coffee in the town nearby.

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**4:37**

LETTERS! MAILMAILMAIL!

_Sora! _

_You haven't written since EVER. What's the hold up? Everything down here is good, Shika has got full marks on a major half yearly in the top science class. A first for Konoha Uni. Also excuse for a party! We surprised him when he got home the day after, but it was only me + Ino that hid. Kakashi refused too. Said it was degrading. _

_Geh. Kakashi is no fun anyhoo. WRITE BACK! WRITE NOW! (haha, get it?) _

_Love love love love LOOOOVE love love, _

_Sakura _

I grin, wondering how Shika would have taken a 'surprise party' I can't imagine him liking it too much. Maybe a friendly get-together would have been okay, but parties aren't really Shika's cup o' tea. I grab the second piece of paper from Shika and unfold it.

_Sora, _

_Haven't heard from you. Last Thursday Sakura threw me a surprise party, it was horrible. Everyone had a great time. They threw streamers and party poppers on me, I think I inhaled the fumes from on of them. After they all gave up and realized it wouldn't be a full on party they all settled a bit and it was bearable. But Kakashi was good and just said 'I knew I'd taught you well.' And was quiet. Unlike Iruka and Ino and the others. _

_Wish you had of been there, I bet you would have at least stopped the excessive use of party poppers. Say hi to Sasuke for me, tell him I'm beating him without the fancy education. _

_Shikamaru. _

I laugh at this, a feel a stab of homesickness, I sigh and grab a notepad and pen and start writing a reply.

_Shika, _

_Me? Stop excessive use of party poppers? Never. I hate to break it to you, but I would have encouraged it. haha. Well, maybe not party poppers, but I would have encouraged various other things. More imaginative things… things that relate to your achievement. Like books and old men. _

_Yeah, yeah, I know you haven't heard from me in ages. I've been busy, we've just started out tests and it's hell. I have basically all science-y tests next week. It'll be GREAT! How much you wanna bet nobody will throw me a party for passing my math exam? 100? Great, you have a deal! _

_Hahahahah, love, _

_Sora _

_P.S. I'm serious about that bet, 100 bucks. _

I finish and rip the pages off the note pad and click the pen a few times, thinking of what to write to Sakura.

_Sakurrrrrrrrrraaaaa, _

_Yes, yes, I know I haven't written in years. I've had tests, cut a gally some slack. I got a cold from hell, I think it's just one of those things you need to experience before you realize how horrible it is… not the cold, Naruto's chicken soup. _

_Infact, just so you don't miss out on this opportunity I'll breathe heavily on this paper a few times for your enjoyment. Then tell Naruto you have a cold so he sends a packet of his soup. Anyway, so I just recover from a life threatening cold situation and am thrown right back into tests. Great. My favourite way to recover. _

_Hope to go into town this weekend. Get coffee-shop cappuccino's. Not curtesy of fatman's coffee machine's coffee, which is only really enjoyable because I'm stealing his coffee and he doesn't know. _

_Say hi to Kakashi + Iruka for me, and Ino and Lee and Tenten and them all. Say hi to Neji too, if you can get that close (aka, within hearing range. Which is hard, knowing Neji.) _

_LOOOVE YOOUUUUUU!! _

_Sora. _

I fold the paper and shove it in an envelope, put an address on it and go in search of a stamp in my drawers, I found one, and ripped it off, dropped it, got another one, and dropped it too. Finding they were the only two I had I sighed and knelt down and shoved my hand under my bed, probing for a small papery thing. If I had to walk all the way to Naruto's dorm to get a stamp I'll be really annoyed.

"Stupid thing…" I mutter, my hand groping under the bed in a pretty much lost cause to find a small piece of paper. Then I stopped, my hand came into contact with something that didn't feel like old food or algebra notes, I frown and drag it out.

It's a small velvet-covered case, and I knew exactly what was in it. I opened it with shaking hands and found a small pair of silver studs. They were a 16th birthday present, and they were from Gaara.

I touched the earrings with shaking hands and pulled out the small piece of paper under the stand they were in.

_Sora, _

_Happy 16__th_

_From Gaara. _

I almost smile. He had never been one for mushy 'THANKS FOR BEING SUCH A GREAT FRIEND!' stuff like Sakura or Naruto were. He was always straight to any point he wanted to make. I do smile. And the shut the case quickly and let out a sigh, I knew there were tears that would be oh-to-eager to spill out but I didn't let them. I kept calm in a more numb way then was healthy and put the case gently into the drawer, it must have fallen out when I knocked it over when I was sick.

I look at the wall, feeling ill, and the steady myself and my eyes find the ground, and also a small stamp under where I'd been sitting, I try to shake the nausea off but can't, so try to erase it from my mind by quickly licking the stamp and shoving it on the envelope to mail it.

I only made it half way to the P.O. Boxes before I had to drop the letter and rush outside to vomit in the garden. It took me a good ½ hour to get the letter mailed as I had to walk slowly and concentrate on other things. Maybe I should have just cried, let it out, been healthy, instead I chose to shove it away, and pack it in a little box try to ship it off, but I knew it wouldn't leave. It wouldn't go away until I let it out, and if I let it out, I might explode. And so I didn't. I chose to vomit twice on the way to mail a letter rather then cry. And strangely, I still hold to that, as stupid as it is.

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**HELLOOOOOOOOO!! Thanks SOOOOOOO much for reviewing! I went on camp! IT WAS MAD FUN! I went on a stealth mission and then fell in a hole! And tried to convince my guy friends to shave somebody's legs. I even gave them a razor! But nooo. They chickened out. And played footy and got smashed. I have bruises everywhere. It was so much fun! Hope you've all be well, now I rant… **

**THANKS SO MUCH TO KITTY.KAT.WINGS! OH MY GOD I LOVE IT! SORA IS SOOOOOOO GOOD! THANKS SOOOO MUCH! I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT. I saved it. it's amazing. I shall treasure it FOREVER. **

**black-n-white-winged./art/secondguess-90301170**

**There is kitty.kat.wings's wonderful fanart, LOOK!! I love it. I love you. I LOVE EVERYBOOODYYY!! Except the people who laughed when I fell in that hole. Gr…. **

**Anyhoo, thanks HEAPS. Love, to-love-is-to-lie **


	50. Weekend

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**Chapter FIFTY(haha, I nearly wrote 'fishty'): **

_Happiness makes up in Height for what it lacks in Length – Robert Frost _

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**Saturday 4/8/18 **

I fell asleep on the couch at 6 last night, well, more like evening. I felt washed out, it seems like it takes more effort to keep things bottled up then it does to let them out. Like plugging up a river, and building a town in the dry river bed, knowing that one day it will rain. And it will rain and rain and rain until it overflows and then you'll had to face the fact you've made a huge mistake.

Today Naruto and I are gonna go get coffee in town, we invited Kimimaro but he said no, of course, making up excuses over studying. I think Naruto's gone to ask Sasuke if he wants to come.

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**6:41**

It was nice to get out. We only went to the nearest town which is a tiny tourist town really, filled with cute coffee shops and craft stores and pointless shops full of stuffed animals and T-shirts. Sasuke came, to my surprise, and we caught the 9:00 train to the village, it was surprising to find something so adorable in Sound. I thought it would just be full of rapists and war-loving politicians.

For winter, it was a perfect day, I mean, we all got away with only wearing four layers, singlet, shirt, cardigan and then a warm thick jacket over the top, with of course my usual blue jeans.

At first, we just got take-out coffee, (Mocha for me, since I haven't had a good one in years) and went to the park.

"You know what I miss?" Naruto said, pouting.

"What Naruto?" I said in a rehearsed bored way.

"The sea."

I'd been expecting something Naruto-ish, like 'recyclable Styrofoam' (which I'm not even sure if there is such a thing) or 'taller trees' but this caught me by surprise. I'd never really thought of Naruto as somebody who's miss the ocean.

"Really?" Sasuke put in, he was stretched out lazily on the grass, and it was sending other girls wild, I glowered and threw grass at him so he sat up and glared at me in what I'd hoped would be an un-hot way. Unfortunately, his scowling to the other girls was even hotter so I sighed and lay back down, leaving Sasuke to be confused over why the hell I threw grass at him.

"What was that for!?" He demanded.  
"Your sultry positioning was annoying me."

"What the hell Sora!?"

"Look to your…." I hate a moment to check my left-and-right. "Left."

He sees the girls giggling insanely and sighs, seeing my point. "Oh."

"Yeah."

"I'd never figure you to be the jealous type."

I sit up and mouth angrily. "I am _not_ jealous! Why would I be!? I mean, it's not like we're even together! Plus, you're with _him_!" I jab my thumb in Naruto's direction, where he'd met a war veteran and probing him with questions, the man didn't seem to mind and launched into stories of his youth and the world and the rest.

Sasuke laughs. "Defeeeeensive."

I pout. "Am not."

"Yep."

"No! I'm not."

"Face it, you find me hot."

"You're so obnoxious. Really, you are, god knows what Naruto sees in you." I said angrily. "If it weren't for the fact you're too perfect for your own good I'd damn well expect him to dump your ass." I told him, glaring.

He feigns hurt. "Really, I think he sees my beautiful personality."

"Hah!"

"What, you don't?"

"What, the one who makes me so pissed off I could give him a black eye?"

"Yeah, that one, see, you see it too."

"That's hardly beautiful."

We continue to argue for another hour, basically until the War veteran person has gotten tired to telling stories to Naruto and wandered off, and then Naruto came back to us, Larry-happy.

"Guys! You missed out on the best stories ever! That guy was amazing!" he does some insane what-he-thinks-karate-would-look-like moves and makes sound effects. "He was great! He knows all this stuff! Seriously, you don't know what you missed?"

"Long winded stories." Sasuke and I said in unison, and then glare at each other.

"Well, I mean, he went into detail, that's all one could expect for such a huge- hey, are you two pissed off at each other?" he'd finally caught on, man this guy could be a detective.

"No shit, Sherlock." I say irritably.

"Why?"

"He's obnoxious!" I yelled out.

"She's bitchy!" he replied at the same time, our words run together and we glare at each other again.

"Whoa.. okay, I know!" he said brightly as ever. "Let's go get coffee!"

This, neither of us can say no too and get up and grumble, subtly trying to trip one-another over, this failed and we both hit the ground, leap up and yell "Clumsy!" and then glower and retreat to either side of Naruto.

After a while we get over being pissed off at one-another and are back to talking, this time in the coffee shop because it's gotten too windy outside. "Reckon it'll snow soon?" Naruto asked.

"I hope hope hope hope so!" I said. "I _loooooove_ snow."

"Let's see if we can get Sakura to send us our ice-skates and we can find a rink!"

I brighten up at this; I hadn't gone ice-skating for years. "Yes! Yes, yes, yes!"

"Hn…" Sasuke groans. "Whatever, I need to use the bathroom." And he get's up and leaves. Haha, he should have through twice about that. Leaving his coffee unattended like that is dangerous.

And so I got his coffee, drained a good half of it into my cup, and then reached for the salt.

"Sora!" Naruto said once he'd realized what I was doing.

"What?" I say innocently.

"You suck, you should use pepper." He grins and I laugh and nod.

"Wise…" I said, and get the pepper and undo it and pour it into the coffee, add salt and a bit of sugar and stir. Laughing.

"Hey, why are you two angry at each other anyhoo?"

"He thinks I love him."

"He thinks everyone loves him." Naruto said, laughing.

I shrug. "Still." And continue adding various things to his coffee, I end up needing to put some of it back so it smells less like pepper and more like strange coffee.

Of course, he comes out, takes one gulp and rushes outside to try and get it out of his system. Naruto and I laugh until we can't breathe.

It was such a perfect day, and I hated having to go home on the 5:00 train. Having to go back to reality and tests and studying, but I have Kimimaro in that world, since he refuses to come out into the fun world, he stays in the work one. Strange boy.

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**Monday 6/8/18 **

Today Sasuke was over at Naruto's, making coffee (with the fatmans coffee machine, I wasn't the only one stealing his coffee!) I grinned and handed him a jar. "Want pepper with that?"

He glared and took it, and put it on his palm, I looked in confusion, it brought it up to his mouth and blew, quickly, I realized my mistake and inhaled in shock and started sneezing and coughing like hell, swearing with every spare moment I had. Screw him!

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**Tuesday 7/8/18**

Holidays end of next week, how weird. This whole term, _poof_! Gone! I feel as if it's all been a dream and I'll wake up in year 10 in my house in Konoha with a million mangy cats to feed. Gah, I wish. I wish I wish I wish I _wish_! Naruto said he'd come over later to let me quiz him on extension Math (idiot, who would pick that except for Kimimaro the insane genius?)

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**3:39**

Haha, VA was fun. I teased Sasuke for Shika that he sucked because Shika was getting better marks on Konoha's shitty education system and had a wife and Sasuke was only half way to beating his mangy brother.

Of course, Shika didn't even really say any of that… but I'm sure he meant it. And if I had of said it Sasuke could have totally shot my down in so many ways, but nobody can insult Shika. It's just free time now; thank ze lord, coz I think all I can manage is throwing semi-dry paint at Sasuke.

Anyhoo, Naruto came over as promised (but dragged Sasuke with him) and we played a buzzer game except without buzzers and with various spoons and cutlery. I lost miserably when I had a turn of not being the question-asker and got fed up so I threw a spoon at Naruto. Of course, then the real competition began. I have a feeling Sasuke has a minor concussion.

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**Wedders - 8/8/18 (OHMY! LOOK! 3 8'S! wooooooooow!) **

Boredboredboredboredborrrredd. End of term kinda sucks. Kimimaro and I went for a walk on campus today, since I have gotten a taste of outdoors and now can't stand being inside for too long, even if outside is below freezing.

This weekend Kimimaro goes away to a crazy Sound Four jig up in somewhere and is all nervous because he has to represent the school and yadda yadda yadda, I said if he was nervous I could fill in for him, you know, put on an insane wig and paint dots on my face and speak all proper-like. He said he'd rather walk onto the stadium naked then let me take over. I said that I can guarantee that most people would rather I take over then that, he hit me, I laughed… and then ran.

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**HELLOO ALL! I was on holidays, don't worry, I didn't ditch you. SORRY I HAVENT UPDATED! But I can't say no to holidays. It was lots of fun and a strange man tried to sell us magazines by singing. And the guy who made my Subway roll was really really really REALLY enthusiastic and it was strange… **

**Oh! And I know how to ROLLERBLADE! I'm proud, though I have a bruise on my knee the worst shade of purple I've ever seen. Infact, I think it's mainly green now. **

**LOVE YOU SOOOOO MUCH! (love youuuuuuuuuuuu) Hope you don't hate me too much! (LOVE you.) loooooovve (Love YOU!) to-love-is-to-lie. **

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	51. ACSC

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**Chapter Fifty-One:**

_Life is an escalator: You can move forward or backward; you can not remain still.__ - __Patricia Russell-McCloud_

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**9:27**

WOW! Quick reply ahoy!

_Sooooraaa! You actually wrote back! WOOOOOOO!! Guess what? Shika caught a cold! He says it's a bad one too, I think I shouldn't have let him read your letter. I'm fit as a fiddle, but he is in bed right now. Ask Naruto to send soup, I'm curious. How was your weekend away? _

_Shika says he hates you. He also says we'll be visiting soon! And apparently you're taking us to a fancy restaurant because you passed your math test!_

_LOVE YOU! _

_Sakura. _

_P.s. tell Naruto to write once in a while! He never does!_

Fuckity fuck. He's going to throw me a party if I pass. Damnit, must not pass! Must fail. Must not lose 100 bucks. I laugh at the fact Shikamaru caught my cold, though. hahahahahhah. I really will ask Naruto to send soup, though.

_Sora, _

_I caught your stupid fucking cold. I hope you fall in a hole and die. _

_Shika. _

I laugh so much at this it's not funny, infact, Tayuya comes into the room to ask if I'm okay. I have to throw away two illiterate letters before I'm calm enough to write legibly.

_Shika, _

_I'll send you some of Naruto's 'miracle' soup. Love you too. _

_Sora. _

I tear off the paper and start the real reply to Sakura, who deserves a real letter since she sent a real letter.

_Sakurraaa, _

_I think Shika is mad. I'll get Naruto to send some soup, it isn't that bad. Really, it made me a lot better. It gets a lot, erm, __out of your system__. _

_Tell Kakashi the science sensei here has nothing on him, since I am going well. What kind of science sensei let's me do that? Pfft. _

_No! Bad, no visiting without a good occasion. And nothing has happened. Here is boring, really really really really boring. I mean, I haven't even passed a math test, not like that's a great party-occasion anyhoo… _

_Anyway, tell the lot I love them lots and that they should all stay clear of Shika since there is only a little 'miracle' soup to go around. _

_LOVE YOUUUUUU! _

_Sora. _

And with that, I jogged to Naruto's apartment, made him make some chicken soup and payed the extra 1.50 to send a thermos full of evil soup from hell to Konoha. But I really doubt it'll even make it through customs, I mean, who would let something that hideous into another state? Nobody. I think it could even be considered as a bomb of some kind.

Anyhoo, that was my lovely day.

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**Thursday – 9/8/18 **

We get to paint the art room wall! I get an excuse to miss lectures today and tomorrow to stay in the art room with Sasuke and some other kids to paint a wall! I gotta run, we have to be down there soon to draw the design on.

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**2:18**

Hahaha! It's so much fun, we have the best group, only mr. grumpy-bum- don't-actually-like-art-Sasuke didn't do much, but he just sat by and insulted various people, but most of us know he's just jealous.

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**Friday 10/8/18 **

Kimimaro has jetted off to some conference… actually, he didn't jet. I think he trained, but meh. I told him to bring me a souvenir, he said there wouldn't be gift shops were he's going and I laughed like a mad thing because it sounded really dramatic and like he was going to jail.

Lalala. Things without Kimimaro are boooooring. Am going to go see Naruto.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:46**

Naruto was trying to study, since he still has tests for stupid hard subjects he picked. Haha. His day is almost always longer then mine, since I only have like 6 subjects.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**6:48**

I'm intensly bored. I think I'm gonna go visit Sasuke.

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**8:45**

Sasuke wasn't much fun, but his fridge and cupboards were. The spiddly-man bought…. Ready for this?... A COFFEE MACHINE!! Yess!! And he has really good taste in French creamy coffee, the one I love on Sundays.

Sasuke seems very very very sad about this, but knows that I will resort back to vent-travelling for this coffee, so figures there's nothing he can do. I don't think he likes the idea of being blamed for coffee theft, seeing as he is the only other one in the dorm.

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**Saturday 11/8/18 **

Okay, things are starting to get just plain sad. Naruto has joined an advanced chemistry Study Club. They call it ACSC. But they say it as a word. And none of them can pronounce it, so they say it as 'as-k-s-k' and I sat there telling Naruto it's more like 'Ak-sk' but he refuses to listen. They study tonight for 1 hour and for 2 WHOLE HOURS tomorrow night. Gah. Seems like I shall be spending time with Sasuke!

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**4:23 **

Spent day with Sasuke. He ended up having to have a ½ and hour shower because I threw a slightly off egg at the fan and he dived in the line-of-fire to save the new coffee-table (I assume for extra comfort when drinking French-style coffee, but I feel I must test this theory) and I don't think I will be allowed back…. But I kept telling him that it wasn't my fault because coffee tables can't stain, but he said he had experience here and it would stink for weeks. I said he should put perfume on it, but he said he'd rather egg. All in all, he'll stink for weeks instead.

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**Sunday 12/8/18 **

Went to Sasuke. He refuses to let me in after yesterday… It went something like this…

"Sassssukee! Lemme in, I'm bored, Naruto's at study club."

"Sora?"

"Yeppers! Now I think your door is locked…"

"Yes, it would be."

"Huh?"

"Yes?"

"Lemme in!"

"Noooo."

"Sasuke Uchiha! Open this door this minute!"

"No. Way."

"Bastard."

No Naruto (His stupid ACSC) no Kimimaro (stupid leaders thingo, but he does come back tonight!) and Sasuke won't let me into his god damned dorm room. Gah. I may explode.

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**HELLO! Now, this may come as a shock, but I think this may be the second last chapter. You see, (I know some of you may be very slightly outraged) but I've decided to make another story for this, because otherwise this may reach a good 70+ chapters. Which would really piss me off. I don't know why, but never fear! It'll just be like an update under a different name. **

**And, as usual, I LOVE YOU THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII… (ect, ect)S MUCH!! :D **

**Love to-love(-would-never-ever-lie-to-you-all-)is-to-lie. **


	52. Betrayal

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**Chapter Fifty-Two: (I have picked two quotes for this chapter, as it is important):**

_Wars teach us not to love our enemies, but to hate our allies.__ -__W. L. George_

**And…**

_You don't need a weather man to know which way the wind blows. - Bob Dylan_

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**4:17**

Going to Naruto's, I'll finish my homework and the such there and wait for him to come back from ACSC.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**10:14**

I had gone to Naruto's and just spread my essays and textbooks on his bed, and practically fell in the middle of them.

"Geh…" I said to myself. I really couldn't be bothered to do all this. Homework on a Sunday and all, it just took to much last-minute 'oh-shit-i-should've-done-this-earlier' effort.

Eventually I picked up the papers and started studying and reading and writing, time passed and I sat up, my hand slid against the text-book paper and I winced.

"Owww! Papercut." I complained and sucked my finger. Papercuts always hurt more then normal scratches and the such.

I grabbed a tissue to put around it then ran to the bathroom to search for a band-aid, finding nothing but old razors (Gross!) I went to ze kitchen, and fumbled through draws there, once again finding none I went to Naruto's bedside table and searched the draws there, I opened the top once and sifted through the junk until I found a very promising looking box, that took up a good 80 of the space. Jumbo bandaid box.

I quickly pulled it out and shoved the bandaid on my throbbing finger, but as I went to put the box back an envelope caught my eye, it wasn't the fact it had our address on it, it wasn't even the fact it had my name on it, it was the handwriting that was on it. My heart seemed to threaten to jump out my throat, it's beating hurt, I slowly with shaking hands pulled the envelope out of the draw and then another one with the same familiar handwriting was behind it. I pulled that one out too, behind it was another. And another. Four letters in handwriting that terrified me, all addressed _to_ me.

I think the only reason I didn't faint from shock then was because I wanted to know what was in them so much. With shaking hands I opened them, they had already been previously opened by the way they came undone so easily. My head swam. I felt dizzy, carsick, nauseas.

_15/3/18_

_Sora, _

_I know this is out of the blue, and you'll have to forgive me for getting your address of your real-estate agent (who I wouldn't trust, as it only took a small bribe for him to tell me where you were) but I needed to write. It's been three years since I've seen you and I wanted to know how you've been, and what you've been doing? _

_Reply soon, the address is on the envelope._

_Gaara. _

I opened the next envelope faster then the last one.

_1/4/18_

_Sora, _

_I don't know if you got my last letter, but I was writing to see how you were going. I heard you were at Sound, interesting choice. Are you looking for Sasuke? If you see him, punch him for me. _

_I was just wanting to get in touch. Reply, please details are on the back of the envelope._

_Gaara. _

I felt like I wouldn't make it through all the letters, my hands were shaking more violently then ever and I still managed to tear open the next one and unfold it with speed.

_11/4/18 _

_Sora, _

_Hope you are well. My details are on the back of the envelope, write back. _

_Gaara._

I felt like I would vomit, but didn't want to disfigure his beautiful handwriting.

_19/4/18 _

_Sora, _

_I think these have been getting through, I enquired about the mail. He said all letters had been delivered… I understand now that you probably don't wish to contact me. If you ever do, details are on the back of the envelope. I will understand if I don't receive any word though, it has become clear you don't want to contact me. _

_If you ever change your mind, details are on the back of the envelope. _

_Gaara. _

I didn't notice the tears hitting the paper, making them crinkle slightly as they dried until a patch of ink I was reading ran, I was numb. I was past nausea and shaking, I felt like cold stone, too shocked to move. Too shocked to even stop the tears that had been refused entrance into the world for so long. There was only one letter left, I made myself move, not caring about the silent rain falling about the bed, did anything at all really matter now?

_25/4/18_

_Sora, _

_Happy Birthday… I'm sorry. _

_Garra. _

My birthday was hardly enjoyable. I spent the day staring at a wall trying to not think of you. I seem to reply to his letter in my mind. I gently gathered the letters into one envelope and help them tight, also taking the other envelopes, if they had his writing on them, they were sacred. I hurt him. He contacted me. I hurt him. Anguish poured through me. I seemed ton rock back and forth, whispering 'I'm sorry… I'm sorry' over and over, until I ran out of breath and felt as if there was no way I could cry anymore. My body, my mind my everything didn't want to work. It was a huge collision of emotions, shock, anguish, confusion, pain… and yet through it all there was suddenly fire. And even though my everything stung from hurting him by not knowing he had written, I felt as if, for the first time, loved.

He did care. He had tried, Naruto was wrong.

Naruto… his name now burned, I didn't care about him hurting me. He hurt Gaara too, I had given up three years for him, helping him, caring, getting him to Sasuke so I could leave, and just when I would, he selfishly took me back, lied and kept me here. Betrayal like that could hardly be forgiven. But right then, I didn't care. I just read and re-read those letters and how he wanted me to contact him, and felt alive, and then read the date and then felt pain at how long ago these were, but then felt alive again, all the pain I had ever felt had been dull, old pain, like the opening of old sores, they still hurt, but there was nothing you could do except wait. This was fresh, new, and there was still time to clean them before they became infected. I felt alive.

The door opened. I heard footsteps come into the kitchen, then the sound of a schoolbag hitting the floor, then the sound of footsteps into the room. I didn't move.

"Oh! Sora, hello! My study group was fun, they're great people!..." his words trailed off, and I snapped into motion. He sounded so… _innocent_! So happy! I ignored the fact he had probably forgotten these, but no person should sound happy in his position. But now I could not trust him, now, he did not need me. Now, I was free. I was alive.

"Sora..? Sora!" Naruto waved a hand in front of my face, and I snapped my head up, e caught sight of my red eyes. "Sora, what's wrong?"

I just stared at him, my mouth couldn't work yet, I moved my hand to show him the envelopes. He stopped, mouth open, and face white. Time was painfully slow, and my conclusion was confirmed. It was him. It had been him all along. My breathing, that had been even and heavy, now became frantic. How could he? Why would he! My hands went into fists, scrunching the letters with them.

"Why?" I got out, still staring at him, anger boiled in my veins, making me shake, I was so horrified, shocked, furious, I could hardly move.

"Sora, I- I don't know what to say, you weren't meant to-,"

And time was fast again. Moving quickly, making my cheeks red with fury. "Weren't mean to what, Naruto? Find out that the person I love has been trying to contact me? That the person I have been wanted to see for months now, the person that I planned to leave for as soon as you found your stupid Sasuke, has been trying to contact me, and you, hid the letters he sent from me? Of course I wasn't meant to know, because then I'd leave, wouldn't I?" I clenched my jaw, eyes fixed on him, he wanted to look anywhere else but at me.

He just nodded, numbly. "Yes. You would, but listen!" he pleaded. "I was worried, I mean, I didn't think you'd find them and I – I-,"

"Of course you didn't think I'd fucking find them!" I spat. "How the hell do you think I'd fucking like it if you were me, if I didn't tell you Sasuke wrote!"

"I mean, now that you put it that way-,"

"Don't you _dare_ act like this isn't bad, Uzumaki Naruto! 'I mean now that you put it this way!' You saw it from my view. You _knew_! You fucking _knew_ that I wanted to see these, all along! You were shitty at hiding clues, you know! I should've known, but it _didn't_ _even_ _enter_ my mind that you would ever, _ever_ do this."

"I'm sorry!"

"Sorry doesn't even begin to cover this, Naruto!" I yell.

"Sora I was afraid you'd get hurt!"

I seethe. "No, you were afraid _you'd_ get hurt, bastard."

"I was trying to help! I'd give them to you eventually, and-,"

"And everything would be fucking okay, and when you did give them to me, I'd suddenly decided I didn't care anyway because it would have been years since I'd heard from him?" I clench and unclench my fists repeatedly.

"Sora, please, calm down!"

I had had enough. There was nothing else for it. I laugh bitterly. "No, Naruto, I won't calm down." I shake my head. "Goodbye." And then walk out. He does nothing, he stands still, I saw tears, I didn't care. I had shed too many, a few from him wouldn't never evoke pity in me. He had betrayed me, and he deserved worse then just a guilty conscience.

I knew what I would do, months ago I had put away a train timetable and taken out some cash for this. It was in my draw, and I ran to my dorm, skidding along the halls, and slamming the door open, Tayuya looked up and gave me a dirty look, but I didn't care, I ran too my room and shoved some Pj's, jeans, the letters and two packs of gum in a bag, and fumbled through the top draw. There it was, train timetable and about 400bucks in cash. I grabbed it, threw it in my bad and ran out, pausing only to tell Tayuya to inform the school I wouldn't be back, her jaw droped but I didn't stick around to hear her answer. I ran into the night, if I walked quick, I would reach the station in time to catch the 9:45 to Suna. Walking quickly out of the school, I felt the weight on me ease as with every step I took. The night was cool, and crisp, my breath was steamy in the cold and the sky was clear, revealing starts and a silver-laced cloud that was covering what looked to be a nearly full moon. Tree's moved silently in a quiet wind. It seemed that the crunch of gravel under my feet was the only noise.

I made it to the bus station before I heard another familiar voice call my name.

"Sora!" Kimimaro. I stop in my tracks, how could I walk out? If only I had have been quicker, I could have avoided this. I could have left when he was still coming back from his conference. The bus station was otherwise empty, he must have been the last one. He knew I'd heard him, since I stopped, but I just picked up my fast pace again, and would try to walk past him, but his legs were longer then mine, and he was soon in my way.

"Please move." I said quietly, avoiding his worried gaze.

"What? Sora, wh-,"He started, and then stopped, not really knowing what to say.

"I have to go… you're in my way." I didn't meet his eyes.

He caught sight of the bag, and the train timetable hanging out the side. "You're going to find him, aren't you?" he said, almost softly.

I nodded, not looking at him still. "Yes. Please move." I said again, my voice even softer now.

His hands caught my chin, he made me look at him, his eyes were blank, they radiated a coldness that I had never really been victim too before. He had always only been warmish to me. Never cold.

And I realised I was doing to him what Gaara did to me, but one hundred times worse, I didn't see Gaara leave. In that way, Gaara had been kind. He would see me leave, he would watch me go. And I started to cry, but these tears weren't the same as the ones over the letters, they were tears of numb cold shock, of betrayal. These were tears because I was the betrayer this time, these were tears because I was hurting him, and I knew I would leave and there was nothing he could do to stop me. He hugged me, well, it wasn't really a hug, more of a protective hold, but he wasn't protecting me. I started to sob harder, and breathed in his slightly sweet musky scent and then tried to push away. I couldn't miss that train.

He wouldn't let me go, though. And I fought, but he caught my hand, and I couldn't leave, and I cried more. "Stay." He said.

I shook my head, I knew if I tried to speak it wouldn't be audible anyway. I shook my head again.

"Stay." This time it was hopeless. It hurt more to hear this note to his voice.

"I can't." My voice cracked.

"Why?" The explanation would take precious time, time I didn't have.

"Naruto helped me see something I should've seen a long time ago." I said.

"That the people here are not worth your time?"

I manage to smile, but I doubt it reaches me eyes. "No," I shake my head. "Definatly not. And I'll see you again, because you'll visit. And I'll visit. And we won't lose touch." I tell him.

"We don't have too." he squeezes my hands and I sigh. I had to go.

But I knew he knew there was no use, I _would_ go. And I squeezed his hand. "Don't watch me leave." I whispered, passing on the only words of advice I could offer. "Turn your back."

And I kissed him lightly on the lips, and he turned his back to me. And I walked. And slowly felt my hand leave his, my fingertips still warm, and I walked. I knew it already, we _had_ lost touch.

And I ran. Not only to leave Sound behind, but because I was now late. I had to run. It was 9:30, and I just had to hope to god that that train was going to be late. Running kept my mind of the growing distance between Kimimaro and I.

I was in luck, it was. I had 2 minutes to spare, enough to buy a ticket and watch the lights on the train pull up, 2 minutes to take on last breath in sound, 2 minutes to stand behind the yellow line and shake in shock over how quickly this had all happened. And I stepped onto the train. The carriage was empty. It still is now. There are only a few other people on the whole train, small, shadows of people, I wonder why they are going to Suna, are they searching for somebody dear to them, too?

It's around 10 hours to Suna. I will reach it by 6, hopefully. This will be a long night. And all I have is a black world outside to watch. And slightly, the further I go away, the more the pain eases. And now I see, I should have done this months earlier, and it was my fault. Maybe these letters were actually a blessing in disguise, I was gone. And there is a huge, unforgiving but marginally better world awaiting me in the darkness dotted with stars ahead.

Naruto would heal swiftly, Sasuke would help, he would've known, probably. Sasuke, I don't feel bad for not seeing him. He will understand, and he will know that I know now leaving will always be and has always been harder. Sakura will be horrified on both mine and Naruto's part, and Shika, he will shrug, and say I should have stayed in Konoha. Kimimaro… I don't know where Kimimaro's future is, probably always in Sound, with Orochimaru and the Sound Four. And mine? Mine is with Gaara, wherever he is. As Shika pointed out, Home is where the heart is, and mine is with him.

I stare out into the night, the moon has come out from behind a cloud, and I can see the land, it's getting dryer. And I stand up on the seat to open the window and lean out, immediately my hair is swept back by the icy wind rushing past. I see a lake behind us, and sand in front, the air is cold and my breath steams up the window when I sit back down, my face is numb. It all went so fast, time has a funny way of messing with your head, yesterday seemed so long ago, an age ago. And then when I found those letters, time slowed, and then when I was leaving, time went fast. And now I'm here, and I won't know what time was like until tomorrow, when I will be faced with the city of Suna.

I felt a bit giddy, I was free, I would miss Kimimaro, but life would slowly be back to what it was. Naruto would be fine without me. And I would be more then fine when I found Gaara.

I smiled, and settled back into my seat, and watched the silvery world go by. Yes, this would be a blissfully long night.

End

_My home is not a place, it is people.__ - __Lois McMaster Bujold_

**I know, don't worry. I have decided Sora's time in Suna will be too long to fit into this story, so it is getting one of it's own. It's to be called 'QuickSand' so keep an eye out! I shall put up an Authors Note on here to tell you when it's out, so keep it on alert. **

**I reall really really really really REALLY hope you liked it, and it's intentionally cut off short, and no, no a cliffhanger! Just a quick end. I have already started QuickSand and it'll just be like a continuation of this, it's just this is already like 50 odd chaps long and I think it'd make it to 70 along with what I have planned and geh, I'll make it another story. :D **

**Thanks so much! Really, thank you. It's been so much fun to read your reviews, some of them are the most hilarious thing since sliced bread and I don't know what I'd do without them. **

**Also, special thanks to: MsLCloud (for reviewing since forever), Dimly, Adecge (For writing reviews longer then my updates… heh), ****Ink'd Fairy Wings****, ****Dragonluvr1993**** (man, when HAVENT you reviewed?), ****Baka Hanyou Raevyn**** (I love you), ****Lady-Gummy-Bears****(you too), ****Readerfreak10**** (for also reviewing since forever), Kina lupi (Ditto), ****HeeHeeHee01****, Shareth, slytherinXprincessX16, ****instrument trio**** (long reviews much?), ****JoiZ. D**** (when haven't you been there either?), ****-Asa-Hoshi-****, ****Celiatsu**** (for always always being there!), ****kitty.kat.wings****, thornwrath (for my one and only flame, and then forgiving me), ****Akiko Rivers****, ****tsukiyukikage****, ****moogle in paradaisu****, ****Becca-Lynne****, ****Adorkable93**** (for being loveably impatient), ****Blood Zephyr****, ****anime.storm****, ****Apollo Pompano****, ****P260even**** (I looove you!), ****freak a geek****, Foxattack, ****RunningBarefootAtMidnight**** and last but never ever ever ever never ever least, ****kaiju3****.**

**Thanks so much! Really, you guys do the hard part, you have to sit and read and put up with my horrible spelling and worse grammar and the such and then think of constructive critisitism that won't make me commit suicide! Seriously, that's talent I'll never have. (I have a temper :P) **

**Man, what would I do without ye all? **

**I will put up an author note for this story when QuickSand is up, and I PROMISE it will be 80-90 Gaara. If not, then you have permission to burn my hopes and dreams until I hang myself. **

**LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOO VERY VERY VERY MUCH! **

**Looooove, to-love-is-never-with-you-guys-to-lie. **

**P.S. I was gonna make this 2 chappies, since it's long, but decided to make it one, because I hate cliffies. They really piss me off. **

**LOVE YOU! **


	53. Author Note

Hello all

Hello all! QUICKSAND IS GO! Looky looky on my pagey pagey for the first chappie chappie. :D

Hope you're all well, I loved your reviews some were insane! (My favorite kind) and no, I can never be bored of insane senseless rambling. Remember that. Okay? So ramble on my fiendish friends!

Anyhoo, here is a small preview. Even though you shall read the chapter now, riiight? But if you don't plan too, this is designed to make you want too.

_The 9:45 to Suna arrived late on Monday. It got there at seven. The sun was up by then, and so when I stepped onto the platform there were many bronze-skinned, mainly male, people crowding around to get on the train. There were few women, and they were all covered in huge lengths of fabric from head to toe. _

_When I had raced up the stairs, I came face-to-face with Suna, and the thing that knocked the breathe out of me was the sheer hugeness of it. It was massive. I had never been in anything bigger then Konoha, which was tiny. But this was a city. It had huge houses, small houses, shabby houses, apartment houses, mansion houses, hotel houses, building houses, houses so tall they would have privately owned elevators, houses so long they would have those flat escalators you find at airports to make people walking from one side to the other move faster, houses with heli-pads, and then from my view at the top of the hill in which the railways were situated under, I saw the poor district. It was houses that were more cardboard then brick. This huge infestation of desert-dwelling people went on forever. And I shook, how the hell would I find one little insignificant individual in this mass of humanity and housing material. _

_ I walked numbly to a bench and sat down. Where would I start? Would I spend my entire life knocking on doors until I found some trace of where he had been? I didn't have enough money to last my entire life. I had left with only PJ's, jeans, two packs of gum and 400. _

_I tore my thoughts away from Sound and back into the hot dry city of Suna. Fuck. This place is big. I must have looked thoroughly lost, since I got some sympathetic looks from the eyes of many passer-byers's. _

_Fuck. This place _is_ big… _

Love youuuu. LOVE YOU. Glad to be back! Hope you loved SecondGuess, and now, TO QuickSand!

Love, to-love-is-to-lie


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